2 Year Old with Night Terrors

Updated on October 10, 2006
S.F. asks from Barbourville, KY
7 answers

My daughter has recently been having really bad dreams. The other day, she woke up from her nap screaming. When I went in her room, she was curled up under her bed biting her mat (I keep napmats next to the twins beds incase they fallout). Every night this week, and a few nights before the incident, she would wake up screaming. Now, if she sees a picture of her father (whom I absolutely do not bash infront of the kids)she screams "bad man". The other night, she woke up around 1 in the morning, crying. I pulled her into my arms and asked her what was wrong and she said "bad man get momma. bad man hurt my bubby". When I asked her who the bad man was, she pointed to the picture of her dad. They haven't seen him in about 3 months. Now, when she wakes up, she comes into my room and sleeps in the bed with me. Does anyone know what I can do to calm of these thoughts? I've taken the picture of their father out of their room, but that still doesn't seem to help.

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone who offered help. Maybe I should give alittle bit more info. Their father left when they were 6 months old. I tried my darnedest to not fight in front of the twins. Someone told me to figure out who bubby is. Bubby is my daughters twin brother. They did witness him verbally abusing me, but their father never actually physically abused me. She was awake when he left me....telling me that he never loved me and that he had cheated on me, so she saw my breakdown. He's never had unsupervised visitations with the kids due to his mental stability. He hasn't seen them in about 2 months. As a matter of fact, he doesn't even live in the state anymore..he took off to Illinios without even so much as a goodbye. So, with that little piece of background info, maybe that will clear up some of the confusion. Thanks again for all your help.

More Answers

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L.N.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi S.,
a shot in the dark but has your daughter witnessed any physical encounter between you and your ex? or has your daughter spent any alone time with her father and something might have happened then?
you might want to bring this up with the pediatrician just in case something shows in the future, you should have this on the record with your daughter's healthcare provider. just a thought. i am sorry you're going through this
vlora

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E.L.

answers from Orlando on

I would definitely get her in to the doctor immediately. Not to scare you or anything - but 2 of my 3 children had night terrors (the youngest still does and she is 4 now) but they never remembered their dreams.

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S.T.

answers from Orlando on

Well, I don't know how this is still going on for you, but I wanted to just let you know, that I believe this to be normal for 2 yr olds. My own children went through it as well when they were around this age, and I asked their Dr. about it, and she said, it's quite normal for 2 yr olds to have bad dreams. It's when they are really becomig aware of things around them and can tell that bad things do happen sometimes. My children are much older now, but I do remember them growing out of it ina month or so. I would first talk to my Dr. and see what he/she thinks. Hope it turns out well for you!

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P.P.

answers from Orlando on

The first thing you need to know is what is a bubby, apparently she is conscience of some disagreements you guys have had. But this sounds a little serious. I have been in child study for a very long time. First of all you need to re-asure her that she does not have to see daddy if she doesn't want to. Find bed time stories to read to her that has pleasant out comes about children and their families. Children loves books with lots of pictures. If the bad dreams continue you migth have to take her to see a child pschaitist so that youy can get to the bottom fo what happen to her. Because trust me,(something truly happen to that baby).

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B.A.

answers from Tampa on

I would definitely take something like that seriously. You may want to talk to her pediatrician about a physical exam or referral to child psychologist. It may just be the strong imagination of a child, but it could very well be a sign that she has seen, heard or experienced something inappropriate at the hands of your husband or another caregiver. I wouldn't want to take any chances with something like that.

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A.N.

answers from Boca Raton on

Dear S.
I too am a single mom of 3. If you live in W Palm Beach area try Youth Services (it's free) ###-###-#### or Homesafe ###-###-#### ###-###-####. God forbid they were abused or he did something bad in front of them. My 8 year old daughter is in therapy. Honestly I would not push him seeing the kids. You and they are probably better off without them. Good luch to you and your babies! A. in Palm Beach GArdens

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M.

answers from Miami on

S.,

I am concerned about this. I would start her in counseling with a good child therapist right away. I am not saying that anything bad has happened to your daughter, but you need to know. Even if she just witnessed something or has heard him say things, it can leave lasting issues. I have a 24 year old son that suffers from Post Tramatic Stress Disorder and other anxieties, just from hearing his father verbally abusive me. As a teenager, he would sometimes snap and become physically abusive. For him it was complicated because he has learning disabilities and has very limited expressive language, so he went mis-diagnosed until just a few years ago. I quit a very good job and lost everything just so I could devote my time to him and get him straightened out before something really bad happened. Once I figured out what the issues were, the solution came quickly and I had a totally different, very happy son in months.

The sooner you find out what is troubling her and help her to deal with it, the better. Not just for her, but all three of you.

M.

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