2 Year Old Sucks Index Finger

C.,

I sucked the very same finger until I was 12. I'm so grateful that my parents let me work it out on my own until I was ready to give it up. However, there were many other people that felt it was their duty to break me of the habit. They used ridicule, hot sauce, Popsicle sticks taped to my finger. It made me feel humiliated and like something was wrong with me. Luckily my parents always made it clear that it was none of their business and I was to be left alone about it. I was grateful for their advocacy. Finger sucking is simply a symptom of a need. Children suck their fingers because they are working out a solution for whatever need is behind it. I'd say it's a pretty independent and simple solution--good job for the child in figuring something out. The challenge is, even if you are successful at removing the symptom (and I'm not sure it can be done without some sort of damage to the child's sense of personal "okness"), you haven't done anything about the need behind it, just taken away the coping mechanism. Needs that are not solved are just managed in some other way, and once again, you generally don't get to choose how. One day my dad asked me if I was ready to quit and he asked me what I wanted as a reward for my goal to quit. I chose a stereo. It would be my first and I was very determined to get it. I was ready and there was no humiliation or intimidation, only success in accomplishing a goal. It all worked out just fine. And by the way, my teeth are perfect. That's of course no guarantee that others' teeth won't be affected, but don't let anyone tell you it's an absolute, especially with the low pressure that that particular finger uses on the teeth. Of course, as a parent, you have the right to make decisions about what is best for your child, as it should be. But, take it from a past finger sucker, it's not that big of a deal, and it's not the worst way to manage whatever need your child is working out. Good luck!

Congrats to her and you be sure everyone leaves that girl alone about her finger sucking! It is only a 'bad' habit if you deem it so. Studies now are showing that all prior advice to stop thumb sucking and such was quite wrong. All humans (adults included) need to develop a survival skill called self soothing as a coping mechanism. She will be a happier, stronger more confident child and adult as she has this strength that some others are robbed of. She may, in time, develop other methods but for now the finger is perfect and that is why she does it when tired or nervous, because it is natural! My 8 yr old used to suck on his blankey and my 5 yr old still sings himself to sleep. Congrats on your new arrival and enjoy them both. Do be sure when the new one gets here that you have her sit with you while someone else hands her "her new baby" so she feels that it belongs to all of you and that she is not being replaced. Do expect some extra finger sucking when new baby comes. They are such a joy.

I sucked my first 2 fingers until I was at least 7 & have no problems now w/my teeth or being able to self-soothe. For me, it was mostly a way to occupy my hands-I pick my lip or pick at my cuticles now. My youngest sucked his middle two fingers til the day he lost his Lovie in Walmart-he suddenly didn't need his fingers anymore now that his cuddle buddy was gone (before this, we'd go back to the house to get him if we forgot the Lovie) Redirect her attention to something else, maybe that will help.

C.,

I hate to break it to you, but its not "almost as bad as thumb sucking" it is the SAME THING as thumb sucking!! That being said, who said thumb sucking is bad? My son started sucking his thumb at about 4 months and now is 6 years old (as of yesterday, I might add =]) and for awhile I tried to break the habit. I had many people telling me he was going to ruin his teeth, kids were going to make fun of him, someone even told me that I should give him a pacifier to replace the thumb and then when he relied on only that, to take it away! I tried hot chili, he ended up liking it, vinegar, which he would lick off the flavor and wipe it on his shirt and bitter nail polish. I even introduced a lovie stuffed animal that he still sleeps with every night. Nothing would deter it. But then I asked myself, really what is it hurting? It was a way to self sooth himself. Would I have taken his lovie, if he had one? Just threw a favorite stuffed animal or blanket in the trash and told him to get over it?

Now that your daughter is getting older, she will slowly wean herself off the finger as she is ready. Which, with a new baby coming, will probably not be any time soon! That will definitely give her reasons to be nervous, or unsettled. As a few people have pointed out, there's many studies showing that thumb, or finger sucking is not that bad. I sucked my thumb, and my teeth are much straighter than those of many other people who haven't in their life.

Its a blessing that your daughter has found a way to calm herself when faced with a difficult situation. Focus on that, that skill is one that will definitely benefit her as she gets older.

V.