I will go searching through and see what has been said before...but wanted to see if any of you have any immediate advice on things that you have done to help your child sleep.
She turns two next week. She's never been the best sleeper...always a very light sleeper, and had silent reflux pretty bad and was taking meds until about 6 mo ago. She had, however, gotten into a pretty good routine for the last few months. sleeping from about 830-7am and napping from about 130-330.
I will admit, that because of her reflux and difficulty sleeping (she was also a preemie, born 9 wks early)...I have always fed and rocked her to sleep. I still do. it's just the routine that we got into because of necessity in the beginning and then it just continued....
This lack of sleep has been going on about a month....and during that month alot has happened....we went on a vacation to her grandparents out of state for a week, she has had a yeast infection (she takes daily antibiotics because of kidney reflux and to prevent infection) and her first ear infection, which she is currently still taking her 10 day dose of antibiotics for.
So...I'm hoping it's just all too much for her little body/brain to take....
That said - I need to find out a way to get her more sleep. I feel just terrible for her. She's only getting about 6-7 hrs at night, and the last 3 days, has refused her nap. And it's not because i'm not trying....after about 3 hours though, it gets to be 4pm and then i figure i need to give up and try for bedtime a couple hours later. I'm concerned her reflux may be back...or something. I have an appt for her doctor on Thur morning. When she does wake up - she wakes up with a screech and screaming for me.
She will finally sleep in my arms after an hour or so....but the second I put her down she pops up and starts crying. She wants to hold my hand, or rub her back, or rock, or put her head on my shoulder...she asks for all or some of these. in the middle of the night she wakes up and she's totally awake after only 6 hrs of sleep.
I've tried it all. She would cry for hours and hours if I let her. She just stands in her crib and says "mommy come back." and if she gets really upset throws up. ...want to add too....I'm not the best at the cry it out - (though I have tried it in spurts)...but I figure, and she has proven pretty steady, that her sleep issues stem from not feeling good usually.....and if she needs me, then she needs me. I have tried to let her sleep with me a couple times...though that doesn't work - she just wants to play....she doesn't sleep in our bed. I have made a bed next to hers and held her hand....though sometimes she sleeps and others she just squirms around.
She has huge black circles under her eyes and it very needy and has attached herself to me.....her temperament is just not "herself."
Anyone have any ideas?
Thanks!
REALLY late in thanking you all and telling you all what happened! As I'm sure you all could guess, I didn't have alot of free time ;).
We did go to the doctor - not only did she have an ear infection and the yeast infection still from her antibiotics, but she had another viral infection! poor thing! it really helped to hear you all remind me that it was a passing thing - you know that, but it's always nice to be reminded! :)
I am one that figures, if she needs me she lets me know. And she was letting me know! Mattress got put in there and I slept next to her - holding her hand.
A week or so later, she got better and we started getting better sleep and eating better, etc. Soon after that - end of October or so, the bottle fairy came to our house and picked up all of her bottles that she didn't need anymore, so that the little babies that need them can use them. She got some fun treats for her generosity. ;)
So we are now bottle free and sleeping better.
...now we have to break the rocking to sleep........and me being the only one that can put her to sleep. ......as all things, I'm sure it will happen when she's ready.
thanks again for all your thoughts and advice!!
oh wow I would have probably gave in and let her sleep with me to see if that helps. She already doesn't feel good and then to be alone probably makes her feel sad. I know when I'm sick I don't like to be alone so imagine a baby. My children are only allowed to sleep in mommy's bed if they are sick or Friday nights if they want but they usually don't. Good Luck!
Whenever a child is on the cusp of an age change, and typically at 2 years old... sleep tweaks, happens.
They child is changing SOOO much, developmentally and emotionally and per overall development.
It is, growing-pains.
It is a phase and temporary.
Just try and keep to the usual sleep routines and bedtimes and nap times.
A child this age, still needs to nap.
And yes, they also get separation-anxiety too. This occurs at various age-stages and is manifested differently, per age.
Your child is over-tired.
She needs to nap.
Getting her to nap or sleep... even if you need to co-sleep with her until she falls asleep, may be needed.
Kids also get more needy, when they don't feel good.
Or when yes, there is a lot going on in their lives.
Just soothe her as need be.
Talk with her etc.
Also at this age, they start to get either "Night-Terrors" or Nightmares, and various "fears" of night time. These are developmental based.
LOTS going on, at this age, both developmentally and emotionally for a child.
Emotions are not even fully developed yet, at this age.
Just help soothe her.
It is a phase.
For us, we have a floor futon in our room. IF/when our kids need to, they can go and sleep there or when they are sick.
It is no big deal. It works for us.
Next: when a child is over-tired or has sleep deprivation... they are not themselves and it actually makes it HARDER for them to fall asleep and they wake, more.
Even adults, are not themselves when they are sleep-deprived.
Hi W..
Poor thing sounds very over tired. I would try to sleep next to her for a day or two to help her get a few good nites sleep. I know others will disagree, but I find when my son is not sleeping well, if I sleep next to him or on the floor, he sleeps sounder...
After she catches up a bit on sleep, you can ease back into your routine.
other thoughts:
-- try to make sure she gets plenty of sunlight and exercise during the day. Little one's sleep better after fresh air and moving around.
-- make sure her tummy is full before bed
-- no lite in the room...
-- comfy pj's
Hope this helps.
jilly
p.s. try getting the book "no cry sleep solution' by elizabeth pantley. she also has a great website.
Is your daughter still in the crib? If so, I would put a mattress in her room & sleep in there for awhile until she catches up on sleep. If she wakes up & sees you asleep, she may just go back to sleep herself.
My daughter was also not a good sleeper and needed a lot of physical contact when going to sleep. We eventually stopped holding her & sat in a chair beside her crib until she fell asleep. I usually had tea during her nap & bedtime and just put my feet up & relaxed. Eventually I was able to sit outside her door until she feel asleep, and just after 2.5 years she was able to walk into her room & go to sleep herself. We were also very lenient and let her sleeep on a little bed on the floor in our room when she was having seperation issues. Now she has a little sister who sleeps in her room so she is never lonely! She also sleeps with a lot of stuffed animals which she calls her sleepy time friends.
We also put a nightlight in her room which helped a lot.
Good luck to you & your little one!!
Your post made my heart ache. My two year old also has trouble sleeping, and there have been times when she looks like a zombie when this has been going on for days, and I just want to scream, "Go to sleep, kid, you obviously need it!" It's so frustrating. When it gets that bad, which hasn't happened in about six months, I start from scratch. Either we co-sleep or my husband sleeps on the floor in her room until she gets enough sleep to catch up. It usually takes three days for her to be caught up. Then we start the usual sleep practices again. She did get confused and asked why she had to start sleeping alone again when she had just had company for the past three days, and I say that it's because she's all better now. She understands being sick and being all better, so she got that.
When they're that overtired, sleep is what they need, and any way they can get it is just fine.
Good luck. It will get better!
This is so hard - on both of you! I would talk to your doctor. I would also do what some others have suggested, and cosleep for a while to give her the comfort she needs to catch up. My daughter was never the best sleeper, and I eventually learned to do whatever I could to let her sleep (I also couldn't do CIO - maybe for 10 minutes... but then I was up and in her room!). Just remember there is no "right" way. Follow your gut and keep trying until something works. I wish you the best!
At this point, she sounds drastically over tired. She won't be able to fall back into a good sleep routine until she catches up. Being overtired makes it very difficult even for the best sleepers to fall asleep and stay asleep. My son is always a classic example of this. You need to try ultra early bedtimes for awhile. I agree with another poster who said you need to do this by any means even if that means co-sleeping or whatever. But as SOON as she gets a little more rested, you will need to work on getting her to be able to fall asleep on her own. That's a big bridge to cross, especially because at this point in her life she's gotten pretty accustomed to being put to sleep (rocked or fed.) Good luck to you!
Read Elizabeth Pantley's "no-cry sleep solution" books. Lots of good ideas there. Those were also the books that helped me identify that my son's sleep problems were *not* normal and required more than standard sleep advice.
In my son's case, the core problem was undiagnosed asthma (which *two* doctors missed---grrr).
Good luck!
Making her routine more active and busy may be helpful. My daughter had sleep trouble, but I tried to get her tired by either taking her shopping or play running and catching before bed time and fed her with warm milk after dinner time and it worked well. I also kept the home quiet, dimmed the lights and followed a similar sleep routine everyday. Now I don't have to take her out often, but still play with her before bed time. She started loving her routine and wishes me good night before she sleeps every night. Good luck!
My son would fall asleep on his own, but then wake up later in the night and wouldn't go back to sleep if we laid him flat. He had to be help semi upright. We ended up switching him to soy milk for other reasons but the same day we switched him, he slept the the night. He's been sleeping through the night ever since. It may be something to try.
Hi, for now I would do what she needs to feel comfortable. When things return back to normal then start from scratch. My daughter wasn't a good sleeper at that age either, mostly because she shared a room with us because we lived in an apartment. When she would get sick it was worse. She wanted to be held and would cry and cry. So I would sit in a rocking chair next to her bed. During the day, although it was hard for me, I wouldn't make her nap if she was adamant about not sleeping. I would turn on her favorite show and let her relax. She had to sit or lay quietly in her crib. Eventually she would fall asleep.
With everything that is going on with her, poor baby, she just has to get back to normal. Believe me it will. I have decided regardless or what people say, not all kids sleep as much as we may want them too. Even if they need it. We just have to keep encouraging sleep and hope for the best. She'll get there. Hope all gets better.
S.
