2 Year Old Bedtime Screaming-

Updated on April 26, 2013
D.O. asks from Naperville, IL
7 answers

My 2 year old has been for the most part a good sleeper at night. Going to bed has never been an issue until the last three days. No change in routine. Normal routine, put on PJ's, brush teeth, drink some milk, read 2/3 books and then rock for about 10 minutes with his music on and usually asleep within 10 minutes of being put in his crib. The last two of three nights, same routine, but when we put him down and leave he starts screaming and says mommy rock, open door (his door has always been closed). He never cries, but just screams, stops, screams, stops etc. He did this for 2 hours (no judgement here please). I finally went in rocked and he did fall asleep. The diaper is dry, I even changed the bedding, gave him an extra favorite stuff animal, and he can freely turn his music on anytime. No sickness. Just looking for ideas, because this mommy needs some sleep. Husband goes to work very early, so he needs sleep too.

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So What Happened?

My son did wake up from his nap with a mild fever, so I gave him children's advil at bedtime, thinking maybe he might have something going on with his ears. I will have to contact the dr. to make sure. I did decide to rock him a little longer tonight and thought it worked, but he started screaming about 30 minutes after I left his room. I had my husband try, but no luck. So I went back to his room and talked a little and rocked, unfortunately he did scream for about 20 minutes, but as of 10:30 all is quiet. Will continue to try different things each night and hope to make his bedtime easier for everyone. I know he needs his sleep. Thanks for all the ideas.

More Answers

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

if your open to it leave his door open a little bit. other than that the response he would have gotten from me after the second night of this is a crack on the behind and a firm go to sleep lol. sorry probably not the politically correct answer but I have pretty well adjusted adult kids and it worked for them.

2 moms found this helpful
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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

We did some of what Sherry did (I don't care if I'm politically correct.) We also hired a baby sitter and my wife and I went on dates until our first went to sleep on his own.

The rest of our kids went to sleep on their own or we just let them cry themselves to sleep. Before we let them cry them selves to sleep, it would take up to three hours of cuddling and rocking and reading before they would go to sleep.

Good luck to you and yours.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

At 2 years old, children go through sleep tweaks. And this is expected and common and developmental based, and their cognition and imaginations are changing too, and they are also hitting physical/motor changes too. And, their emotions are not even fully developed yet.
Hence, it is a TON of stuff, and "growing pains" they are going through at this age.
How they used to sleep, no longer applies.
Because, they are no longer a baby. But a Toddler. Now.

Also at this age, developmentally, children may start to have nightmares. It is normal and developmental based.
And they also start to have general "fears" of nighttime.
It is a reflection of their changing cognition/imagination and also, their emotions are NOT even fully developed, yet at this age.
And hence, they cannot accurately say, why or how they feel or what is bothering them. And they don't even have the vocabulary to then analyze their own discomfort much less, to tell the parent.
And we cannot turn "off" their imaginations or feelings.

It is an age stage.
It is not easy for them either.
But yes, at this age a child still needs comforting. They get anxious. They "miss" their parent etc.

What we did was: have a futon on the floor of our bedroom. And then ANY time our kids needed too, they could come in and sleep there, on the floor. We got sleep that way, and they got sleep.
It did not disturb anyone.

It is not only the parent... that is getting interrupted sleep. It is the child, too. Sure, a parent needs sleep. We all do.
But at certain age phases and developmental hardships, a child needs us. It will ebb and flow.
The sleeping patterns of a child, is never static.
It changes.
And kids hit many stages of growing pains and cognitive/emotion based changes, too. Developmentally. And they can't help it. They are changing/growing/developing regardless. And it is not easy for them.
Growing pains are not just physical. It is also their cognition, too. Changing. But they don't know that. But the parent needs to know that.

For me/us... instead of fighting against it, I would go according to my child's cues.
And then bedtime was not a battle.

Try, talking with your son. About it. And see, why/how come he is doing this. My kids always took comfort in my talking with them... about things at bedtime.
And maybe he may have an ear infection as the other posted below.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

We used Ferber, it worked for us. seems like rocking is his sleep association.

When the bedtime routine started getting a bit elongated, with lots of requests - kiss the bear, kiss the plant, kiss the humidifier, kiss the choochoo train, wipe my nose, wipe the mobile, wipe the crib, kiss the nightlight, let's say our alphabet, let's count from 10 backwards (at about 2 years old), I quit doing it.

I let hubs tuck him in for about 1 week straight, and it was lie down, tuck in, and goodnight. After a week of hubs establishing the new/ prefered routine, either of us could do an easy bedtime.

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E.R.

answers from Champaign on

Def normal. We just started leaving the door crack and made sure a night light was in there so he could see somewhat. It seemed to help.

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L.B.

answers from New York on

My two year old was doing that this winter and I was so sure he wasn't sick, but then I found out at a routine appointment that he had an ear infection. It only bothered him at night. Something to maybe look into.

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D.M.

answers from Denver on

I think it's common at this age, and there is no right answer. Rule out an ear infection (my kids rarely got fevers with them....) . Also at this age, they are starting to assert a bit of independence. I am on the other side of this... I would and still do help my kids fall asleep at night. They actually were great sleepers as babies. I just found a way to enjoy (95% of the time) our time together at night. My 6 year old still asks me to lay with her at night before bed. I enjoy our 20-30 minutes of downtime before bed each night. Do what you need to do for your family and sanity. Best of luck

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