2 Year Old Afraid to Go to Bed

With all my years with my own three and teaching preschoolers, here is my two cents worth. Hope it helps.
I think you will need to observe closely, difficult I know when he are crying or screaming, to figure out why. At this age it could be seperation fears, bad dreams, or awareness that crying or screaming gets a reaction or result.
At this age, it could be awareness that life goes on even when they are asleep. Mom and dad are doing things and he might feel as if he is missing out.
Children do not like to say good-bye, it makes them sad even if they realize you are coming back. Maybe good night makes him sad.
At this age, children also may begin to become more aware of dreams. Or maybe something scared him one night. TV and movies sometimes cause this, even if you are careful of what he watches.
And, sometimes it can be that it gets a reaction that they desire. If he can turn it off quickly if given the result he wants, then you know.
If you are sure he is truly upset, you might try sitting on the floor next to his bed or in the doorway. Don't interact very much but a quiet song or just a simple shh, it's okay, shh...might reassure him.
Another thing to keep in mind is at this age, chilren often need to go to bed much earlier than when younger as they are not taking so many naps during the day and they are growing very quickly both mentally and physically. Sometimes when children are very tired, they can become upset much faster and to a higher degree.
And, just thought of this, if in a growth spurt,hunger could contribute to this. At times, I have given mine oatmeal to eat before bedtime.
If I think of any other suggestions, I'll pass them on.

Hi C.,I feel for you! I believe it was right around age 2 when my Son started doing the same thing. Our pediatrician said that at that age they are more aware of being separated from their parents and just more aware period of everything. Then there is the control issue that starts. They want to have some control of their environment. The advice I have read and received has been to let them cry at least 10 minutes and then go in soothe them, do not pick them up or turn on lights or even really talk much...be boring. Then say time to go night night and leave. If the crying starts again, repeat but wait longer to go in. Basically you are letting them know you are there but are not going to get them out of bed and them getting up is not an issue. Most Moms that have shared this including me will admit it isn't easy but should only take two nights for them to get the routine down. You and your husband may have to take turns doing this. Just remember consistency is so key here. Daddy can't get him out of bed or be funny or rowdy. He needs to be boring when he is in there so your Son won't think it is fun. The point is to soothe them, patting them on the back and speak very few words but reassure you are there and then say it is time for night night and leave. He will test you and depending on his personality...maybe quite a bit the first night. He will learn though that if he screams or cries that it doesn't mean he gets to get out of bed and hopefully will go to sleep. Hope this helps you! Blessings, J.

This happened with ours and it is the age when both of mine started going to bed with their door wide open. It took our son longer to get over it, but he did. Maybe add something to your routine like sitting in his bed with him to read a book, and let him know you'll check in later. Also, give him some choices. Kids this age really struggle with control. If you can find something that he can "do all by himself" and have control over, he might feel better.
Be sure to tell him what's going to happen, what his choice is, what you expect him to do, and follow through: "Mommy will read you one book, then I'll turn out the lights and do some laundry. I'll check on you after I put the clothes in the washer. You may play with your cars while I do laundry, or you can stay on your bed, I'll check on you after I put the laundry in the dryer.."

Once we gave our son a little control (in an appropriate way) and assured him that we would check in, he was fine. Some nights he has played in his floor for 30 min after bed time, some nights he goes right to sleep. Doesn't bother me. I figure I could fight him and hear him cry for half an hour before he goes to sleep, or he could play by himself and wind down for 30 min before going to sleep....

I read somewhere to try giving me a flashlight that he can turn on in bed, it stated that it makes them feel safe and they can see if anything is in the room that is scary, etc. Maybe that will help.