1St Time on Bus

Hello there,

I was wondering if you are in the Amherst area, and what the before and after school program you mentioned. I am looking for one myself for my son who is 8. Any advice would be welcomed.

S.

Good morning..
I had the same concerns when my kids started school.. I was picked on so bad in school.. So i was really worried about my kids.. They are 9 and 10 and i still worry.. But the schools are a little more aware of things than they used to be.. They do keep the kindergardenb up front with the driver and they do keep an eye on them.. My brother in law is a bus driver and we laugh at his stories.. Most of the trouble they might have that i hear of is not knowing where they live.. If he si not sure at the fisrst of the year where to drop them off he asks if they know where they live, their reply is usually something like, yes i live in a white house and i have a dog.. Not usually very helpful.. So if you want to teach him the name and number of your street.. Or the name of the day care where he will be going that would probably help.. But as for you being worried you will worry but after the first week or so you will see that they do fine.. As for preparing him.. I would just mention if anyone hurts his feelings it is not anything to do with him.. Some kids dont know how to play right and if he ever needs to tell you anything tell him he can and you will help him through it and can talk to the teachers with him to make sure it doesnt keep happening.. My kids get picked on from time to time but nothing like they used to thank goodness.. Good luck and best wishes.. Just think your little boy is growing up... So sweet.. These are special times..

Hi C., my daughter started kindergarden yesterday and I put her on the bus for the first time. She was all excited until we got on the bus, her whole face changed and was filled with anxiety. It ripped my heart out! I realized that I had to show her I was ok. So I smiled at her and kissed her and told her I would see her after school. All day I worried about her,
much to my relief when I got her off the bus that afternoon,
she was sitting next to a friend and grinning from ear to ear.
She told me about all the things she did at school on her very first day. I wanted to let you know you are not alone. I hope I
have helped ease your pain.

Hey, try not to worry to uch because once when he gets on that bus and makes friends he will forget all about you. When my kids were that age it was very scary. I would make sure they got to and from school and also tho the Boys & Girls club. It is hard thou I must say if you are a 40 hr work mom. But try to hang in there, He'll be fine. If not tell him that you love him and that you'll see him afterschool. Maybe give him something he can hold on to in his pocket or school bag. That usually helps. Well good luck. N. (OH always give them a HUG) :)

I understand your worries, but I do not think he is too young for the bus. As someone else stated, day care staff are good about getting them on the bus in the am and off the bus in the pm. During the first week of school teachers will all be on hand to help him find his classroom. I teach at a k-6 school, and I can asure you that the older kids want nothing to do with the younger kids. Your son will sit in the front of the bus near the driver. As far as the teasing, I might talk with him generally about how good friends play with each other and how mean names can hurt people's feelings, but I wouldn't say that kids might say mean things to him about his size. Kindergarten teachers are very conscientious about teasing so I just don't think that will be a major problem in kindergarten. By the time kids start really teasing, who knows, maybe the other kids will have caught up to him in height and it wont be a concern.
I know it's an emotional, bitter-sweet time for you, but I think you'll see that everything will work out just fine. :)

I just sent my 3 yr old on a bus for summer school.. He did fine.. try not to worry.. they look at it as a great experience, and all the busses have monitors.. so if anything does happen, talk to the transporation dept and they will take care of it for you. He'll be fine..

He will probably be fine. I understand your frustrations.

Do some role play- does he even know what teasing is? Use some puppets or stuffed animals... even have 2-3 come in and be another aggressor or another that comes to stick up for the other being teased.
I have always liked this article as well-
http://www.loveandlogic.com/pdfs/teaseproof.pdf

With a little prep- he may just suprise you and really step up to the plate. I was always teased as a kid and the only time I felt comfortable was college. I am thinking now there are more programs on anti bullying than there ever were.

I had some of the same concerns but my son was so excited to go on the bus and he was just fine. He loved it. They sit in the front and usually (with out school) have a buddy. The teachers wait for them at the school and make sure everyone is accounted for. I don't know if I would talk to him about other kids teasing. You may cause some anxiety for him and he may get scared. I would talk about teasing in general like at a playground etc.

Collette - it looks like you have already gotten tons of great advice. Like a lot of them said, talk to the bus driver and let him know your concerns. I am sure everything will be fine. I actually worried myself to the point I was sick to my stomach a year and a half ago when my son had to take the bus for preschool. I was so paranoid... then he had a horrible time behaving and he had to be put in a harness! SO now he is entering kindergarten and I am with you... sooo very nervous about him riding the bus. I am more worried about mine picking on other kids though! So anyway just wanted to let you know you aren't alone. Good luck with it all!

My advice is this...since your son will be getting on the bus from the before-school program, let him do that, even on the first day. But, watch from a distance (best if he doesn't see you). That way you can see his confidence and that he is safely on the bus. You can even follow the bus to school if that will make you feel better. I was nervous too when my son when the first time. But they are stronger than we know! It is a growing up experience that we can't do for them. They need to do it themselves. I agree with most other comments regarding the teasing. The kindergarten kids sit up front and they don't interact with the older kids. The teasing usually doesn't start until they go out to recess as they get a little older.

My oldest son just went through this last year. I have 2 other kids, and was pregnant at the time and he had to ride the bus. It was scary for me to know that my son was growing up, and I wasn't there to protect him. Then I thought about all the other times he grew and didn't need me. Like the first time he crawled, and walked. I even thought of him riding his bike, how he just loved the freedom, and always was okay. It was hard. And putting him on the bus was just as hard. I knew at the end of the day he would be there on the bus safe waiting for me to get him. It got easier as the days went on and he was just so proud of himself, being a big boy like the older kids. And I was proud of him too. There were times when he said the older kids were picking on him. So we came up with a stratagy for that-sit near the bus driver so they can hear what is going on and stop it. This works for the kindergarders. But as he gets older he has to learn to fend for himself. That's life always someone picking on someone else for some reason or another. And if he is confident with who he is, it shouldn't matter. Your son will be okay, safe and all. Just don't show him you're scared as he will follow your cues and be scared too. Just smile and wave, even if you cry once the bus drives off like I did for the first week. It all works out. Hope this helps.

Hi C. -
My oldest daughter is going to Kindergarten this year too. I'm lucky enough though to be able to have my husband drop her off in the morning and I pick her up after work. She will also be going to a before and after school program in the Ashburnham school. I don't know which school your child will be attending, but the after school program here also consists of Kindergarten thru some Middle school children. What I'm trying to say is...don't worry so much about the teasing on the bus because there can always be teasing in the classrooms as well as the after school program and you can't keep your child from going to school. Teasing can be a very mean thing and affect children all thru life...you just have to try and stop it at the very beginning before it gets out of hand. Teasing is a part of growing up and may make your child a stronger person because of it. I wouldn't worry to much about it until an incident actually happens. I hope that helps some.

Hi, let me tell you something. Kindergarten is the best time for the bus. It's all so new and cool. If you're really concerned, talk to your driver. My mom drives school bus and has for over 20 years. She loves it and there are many drivers that are just like her. Every year she has a parent that is concerned and she gladly talks away their fears. She would rather know that you and he were a little freaked out than have him burst into tears unexpectantly. So go ahead and talk to your driver as he gets onto the bus. As far as being teased, that's why kindergartners sit in the front. Drivers and monitors (if your district has them) keep an eye out for the little guys.
I hope this quells your fears some.
Good luck, it'll all be all right ;)

Don't be scared C.!

My daughter LOVED the bus...taking the bus made her feel like such a big girl (well that and eating in the cafeteria ha ha). My suggestion: let him ride the bus, mom. You don't want him to be worried about it, you don't want to stifle his excitement regarding anything that has to do with school. Get to know your bus driver. Get their name, introduce yourself. Express your concerns to the bus driver (away from your child's earshot). I'm betting the bus driver is expecting it. Get to know other parents at the bus stop and see if there are any others who share your concerns. More than likely there will be other older kids at the bus stop and hopefully their parents, so you can ask them if they've had any concerns with this bus driver.

Don't let it get you all wound up (which it sounds like it already has). This is another part of your son's growing up - he'll be okay!

One of the things that has always kinda surprised me since I've become a parent is the fact that as my child is growing and learning, I've found more and more things that I have to grow and learn about, too. Your son is just at a stage where you're not in control. You now have to trust someone else with your child's care. But don't stress it, Mom. He'll be a-okay. You wanted to know how to prepare him in case he gets teased. Stop stressing over what MIGHT happen. Don't talk to him about that until it happens....and that's IF it happens, which more than likely it won't. If it does, then deal with it. But if you start trying to tell him how to deal with something that hasn't happened, you run the risk of stressing him out and scaring him. Keep everything about school in a positive light. He'll be fine, Mom!! Millions of kids started school riding the bus for kindergarten and they're all fine. Your son will be, too.

Hang in there...

R.

I can understand your concerns, but he will be just fine. Kids tease. Your son will be subjected throughout his school years. Everybody was teased as children. He will be hurt, I'm sure, as we all were, but it will make him stronger. Don't worry too much!!!