My husband and I are very happily married and are supposed to be celebrating our 17th anniversary tonight. We've both been looking forward to it all week. My parents are keeping the kids overnight, and we had dinner reservations at a very nice restaurant that we love. I got my hair done and actually liked the way I looked for a change. The time came and went. My husband got stuck at work and I had to either cancel or push back the reservations. He said he wouldn't be able to leave work until 9:00, so I cancelled the reservations. Now it's almost 8:30 and I'm starving, and sad. Should I wash my face, put on pajamas and find something here to eat, or stay fixed up and suggest we go out somewhere for a late dinner when hubby gets home at 9:30? I'm really not in the mood to go out, but it is our anniversary and I'm usually a pretty upbeat person, so I could probably shake the bad mood once hubby gets home (he's always happy). What do you think?
Thanks, Ladies! You made me smile, and kept me company while I waited to hear from my husband. I loved your suggestions, and almost left to pick up take out, but then hubby called and we decided to go out to eat when he gets home. He should be here soon. :) We won't make it to the original restaurant we planned on because it's too far away, and now it's just too late, but there is another place with great food that is nearby. I'm sure we'll have a wonderful time!
*Someone asked why he didn't arrange to make it home earlier since he knew we had plans, and that's a fair question. He's the internet director at a car dealership, and he did his best to schedule appointments early in the day, but some arrived late. It's crazy to me, but he sells tons of cars to people from out of state, and his last customer came from 5 hours away. They got delayed and that caused my husband to run late, too. I used to complain a lot about the car business and the hours my husband works, but he takes more time off now to spend with family, and he loves his job. It's frustrating during times like tonight, but through the years I've learned to live with the long hours of being a car guys wife.
Thanks again for the input!
hit the town, with or without the husband! You're all dressed up! I'd find a bar and sit and have some wine, by myself!
Coming from the woman who's been stuck at work more times than she'd care to mention, I'm going to tell you to go with what you think he'd like best. While you've only been stuck at home, he's been stuck at WORK, feeling GUILTY, and probably po'd at his BOSS for causing this. Sometimes you just cannot walk out without undoing a lot of 'political capital' - that unwritten unmeasurable level of goodwill that you've established with you employer. If you think he's going to want to go straight to 'comfort' zone when he gets home, then slip on the fancy nightie right now & order in. Or, if you know he's the kind of guy that can unwind better by going out to a bar & grabbing some appetizers, then keep your clothes on a little longer ;) Not all of my 19 anniversaries have gone as planned, and i can't expect them to. Sometimes its him, sometimes its me. But on those occasions, we remind each other that each day we are married to each other is no more special then the next, as they are all special. Relax, don't be angry, and salvage what you can.
How about changing into a slinky negligee and celebrate there at home since your children are at Grandma??? ;-) This is not anyone's fault...so don't be upset, you can celebrate another night...it isn't so important that it happens on the night of your anniversary is it? You have time to run and get something for dinner that both of you like...take out chinese...barbeque....pizza....then change into that negligee and greet your husband with a smile!!!
Happy Anniversary!!!!
That sucks, and I'm sure hubby feels bad too. I am 100% with Kansasmom... change into something sexy,open a bottle of wine (Maybe try to get some if you don't have any on hand) and order a pizza. I don't know of ANY man who would be dissapointed in coming home to that!!! LOL! Since your parents have the kids, maybe you could go out for breakfast somewhere decent. (Yeah, breakfast isn't nearly as nice as dinner... but hey, no kids!!!) Have a bowl of cereal (Or dig out a pint of ice cream ;) lol) and read a book, work on a hobby, find a funny video to watch online, something to tide you over until he gets home. The night can still be salvaged!!!
I know I'm late but I am really inspired by what I have read here :) It takes a LOT to not get angry and bitter at times like these. I have to really work on it myself and I am so happy that you made the decisions you did. It's so refreshing to read a lasting marriage and you've made it 17 years for a reason, it's WORK! Anyways, I just wanted to say that I am inspired by your response and how you reacted!! Far too often I hear women bashing their husbands when things like this happen and it's just refreshing to read your story. I'm sorry it happened that way but hopefully y'all still had a good time. Congrats on your anniversary and thanks for posting!!
I am so sorry A., I am sure your husband must feel very disappointed as well. How often do you get all dress up? Don't change, you look great today and it will be nice for your husband to see you like that.
It doesn't matter where you go (or if you stay at home) at then end the real celebration is that you guys have being married for 17 years!
Congratulations.
You could even go to the hot dog in the street and make it special.
When huby and I got married, we didn't have a big party, but we still wanted to go out. We went to Papayas (a hot dog place in NY) and we ate there. We just went there in this past anniversary with our kids, and even if they didn't care to much about the place it was a good memory for us.
I would go to a new place, but if you really don't feel like leaving home, then get some wine, nice food, candles, oils, etc, etc.
Don't feel sad, today is a great day to remember why you guys got in love to each other and look how much you have accomplish.
Congratulations and hope there are many more to come!
I was just picturing you opening a bag of say cheetoes and drape them on the floor all the way to the bathroom where you,ll be soaking inthe tub with candles lit and the smell of his favorite perfume and romantic music. Better hurry times a ticking.
I know I'm late to respond but if it happens again here is my suggestion... grab a bite to eat out of the frig then go get some sexy lingerie on and wait in bed for him, it's still your anniversary and when he gets home he will know that you love him even if he is late! after 17 years dinner can wait but time together is what is most precious!
I would be disappointed too, but I think that if you can follow kansasmom's advice, you'd be able to shake that disappointment.
And crappy take-out always tastes better in bed, if I recall correctly : )
HAPPY, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, I am so happy to hear your response!
Dear A.,
If you like Chinese and they deliver in your area, order in. I hope your have some champagne on hand (or if your and your man are not drinkers have some sparkeling cider on hand). If that doesn't work for you and you have a good market near your, stay fixed up, go to the store, get a GREAT steak (ribeye or NY strip), get some NICE salad mix and a nice dressing, some good brand twice baked potatoes (if I can't make my own I recommend Stoffers), and the garlic bread that is prepared or just regular french bread (make sure you have some butter). For dessert, vanilla icecream with fudge sauce.
Basically what I am saying, don't let the time line spoil this day with the one you love. If you need your husband to pick up some things on the way home instead of your running out....just let him know, you can still make this evenig SPECIAL. I can garunatee you it will be more special then if you went out tonight.
If he's a good guy I'm sure he will make it up to you. If he's not, then I guess you will just have to dump his sorry YOU KNOW WHAT!
Keep us posted....and Happy Anniversary!
Blessings....
Eat a light snack (soup or salad) and wait for him. It is still your anniversary.
It's wonderful to acknowledge the actual day of the anniversary, but you're really celebrating that you've been married 17 YEARS. You've already moved forward in your plans, but to others reading this who are also likely to have unexpected obstacles on anniversaries, remember that you can celebrate the YEARS together any evening. My husband and I often do so when our anniversary date falls on a weekday.
The biggest disappointment for you must have been all of the special preparations that didn't lead to the evening that you expected. But, you were probably such a lovely vision to him when he walked in the door, that it's still worth it, even if you didn't go to as special of a restaurant.
Go out, of course!! Or you could keep your hair and makeup fixed and hop in bed with him. I guess it's up to you whether or not to be in a bad mood, but do realize that sometimes things that are out of your control can happen and life will still go on.
Why couldn't your husband leave work at a resonable hour?? Did something unexpected come up? Since your husband knew you had nice dinner plans, I don't understand why he didn't leave work hours ago??
I'm very late in responding, but as someone said it doesn't need to be celebrated always on the exact day. Years ago my husband took me to a place on Vday that was absolutely horrible. Bad food, bad atmosphere etc. It was something new and we like trying out new places. The next weekend we went someplace else that was magnificent. I knew he was sad about Vday and told him honestly that this was our Vday. As long as we're together and being in each other's lives, today is Vday. He was so happy.
I'm late in the game. But you are a saint. My husband is too. One time on our anniversary at the dinner table i got a call from a laboring mother and she was moving along quite fast.....we had to leave. Marriage comes with its partnership to support one another through it all.....I have had to cancel on my family too. But i do try to schedule special time when I can.
Happy Anniversary.....K.
