Any tips on how to handle my 17 month old daughter when she throws herself on the floor (bonking her head or busting her lip open), and screams and cries if she doesn't get her way? She is so well behaved until she wants to do something or have something and I don't respone immediately. In public I really don't know how to handle it. At home I ignore her or distract her and this seems to help.
I have a 20 month old boy who also knows how to get what he wants. I have found www.askdrsears.com really helpful when I need some advice on how to handle parenthood. Good luck.
When my youngest was 17 months and doing this so was my older boy who was 4. I just took them straight to the car, strapped them into the carseats got in, turned the music up so I didn't have to hear it and took them home.
If the temper tantrum continued at home then they went to their rooms and stayed there until they were quiet for a minute for each year of age. At that time the toys were in a play room so they didn't have any payoff for being in their rooms.
I agree, don't give in, leave if you have to. But the biggest thing is the hardest for me: model good anger control yourself. Personally, I tend to want to DESTROY things when I am angry, but that hasn't worked out that well for me, and I certainly don't want to teach that to my son. So, when I'm mad, instead of throwing my adult version of a tantrum (smashing, throwing, yelling--hey, that doesn't really sound that adult :)), I just tell him that I am really mad and feel like smashing something, but I'm not going to because it won't make me feel better. Instead, I say, I am going to take deep breaths and start talking about something else, something I am glad I got done today (sense of accomplishment), something I am glad I get to do today (looking forward to something), something I am thankful for (feeling grateful). I know it may seem like they are too young for this to matter, but my son (16 months) mimics me doing everything from dusting to putting on lotion, so I know he is watching and learning . . .
i remember when both of mine were that age (they are now 14 and 9) and it seems like that is natural for them to throw a tantrum. the lady that took hers and took them home that is what i did and let me tell you i know its imberassing and somewhat inconvienent but after a little bit of that they stopped. and when he threw himself down in the store and threw a fit i looked at him had him get up and warned him if he didnt stop we were going to go home and not get what we came for and explained to them both that wasnt tollerated. now as they are older i have a different delima. hope this helps. i miss them little lol. good luck
mmm idk mines not that old yet but im sure he will try that,what im thinking of doing is reminding them of "SANTA"
im gonna tell him that santa is watchng him all the time n if he sees him acting like that he wount get any toys
but i dk if that will really work
i know how it is to be out n hav ur child thorw a tantrum i have seen kids do it and had kids i was babysitting for do it,i guess ignoring them is one way but idk if it works b.c oppl will just think that u are being"mean"(i would love to see those parents discipline their kids out in public)
i really dont know what to tell u but i figure the santa thing might work for awhile
First off let me tell you..I feel your pain. My 15 month old has hit this stage and he normally gets what he wants because he has a mighty good set of lungs on him....
If you discover anything that works...pass it along.
She's at the age where a time-out should help. It shouldn't last for more than 1 min per year of age (so 1-2 min for her). Basically, it's to get her in another setting, removing her from the situation and allowing her to calm herself. I send my kids to their room for timeout, and they have to sit on their chair. I stand close by the door to make sure I don't hear them getting into toys or anything. When the time is up I simply explain what behavior is expected and give them hugs and kisses and it's usually over. If not and they continue with the tantrums/attitudes then I try laying them down for a nap because a lot of times it means they are just overly tired and need some rest. My son will be 3 in June and this has worked very well so far for him. My daughter is almost 20 months so she's still in the process of learning what timeout means. We have to use it often when they get possessive of toys and dont want to share, they start hitting and screaming so we separate them and sit them in two separate places for a "breather" until they chill out.
Hi L.!
My 19 month old son does the same thing. And we handle it the same as you. He seems to act up worse if we respond to the tantrums.
Your daughter is at the age where she is testing the waters. Trying to see just how much she can get away with. Her dramatic scenes will deminish with time; once she realizes that it isn't working.
Best wishes,
A.
Hi L.,
Naturally in-home and in-store tempter tantroms are going to behandled in different manners.
A quick at-home method is to have an ice cold glass of water ready (small glass please - and no ice cubes). During the temper tantrum you can startle her with a splash of the cold water. Once she is startled she will calm down enough that you can (and you have calmed down also) talk to her and explain why she is getting disciplined in an age appropriate language.
As far as in-store melt downs you have to be commited to stop your shopping (be prepared to walk away regardless whether your cart is partly or fully loaded) and go home. Your daughter, because of her age, might not fully understand. But, if you are consistent with the punishment she will understand eventually.
In both cases you need to remain calm and talk in a quiet voice (she will have to stop throwing a temprum in order to hear you). Neither option can hurt your daughter. Also you need to get to her level by kneeling down before speaking. Every child (and adult) needs to be heard...the temper tantrum is thrown because she does not have the verbal skills to communicate with you.
Good luck L..
W. Q
My son is 21 months and we had the same difficulty. Its difficult in public, but you have to be consistent. Its rough, but she'll get through it soon enough. My son's a big head toss kidd, and we've had to deal a lot with it. I just look at him and shrug telling him he wouldn't hurt his head if he didn't throw a fit. Getting anxious and upset with public areas and fits makes them worse. Ignoring them is still the best way, or removing them from the situation, I find. Hope that helps a bit...
