15 Months Old Not Sleeping Trough the Night

Dear friend,

First of all, excuse my broken English too. I am from South America. My advice is don't let you daughter nap at all, you'll see how tired she'll get by 7 or 8. Create a routine try to put her in bed at the same time everyday.
For her feeding habits, don't push if she doesn't want to eat. What you can do is offer her a variety of veggies, pasta, diced meats and a drink. Maybe she is not hungry because she is full from eating fruits. Try to give her a variety of things, avoid fruit, maybe when she gets hungry she'll try other things. I wish you luck.

The book The Baby Whisperer - changed my life... and in just 2 days I had my baby sleeping through the night (without lots of tears).

I HIGHLY recommend this book!

To Michelle C - I got the secret!!!

First off, RECIPES: http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com/
Look for nutrient-dense and calorie-dense foods. Dairy foods are great - if she doesn't care for whole milk, try soy milk, cheese, yogurt (great mixed with mashed bananas), or mix cream cheese with pureed veggies. Babies have no problem with cholesterol and fat - in fact it helps their brains grow, whether it's animal fat or vegetable-based fats.

I try to get the baby to eat something right before bed, like applesauce or baby yogurt. And nurse your baby right before you go to bed (even if the baby has already gone to bed a while ago.) You should be able to get more sleep before she wakes again.

Secondly, you don't HAVE to stop nursing (or night nursing). It makes no sense to me that your doctor says that nursing is why she's losing weight. If it doesn't make sense to you, either, I can recommend a pediatrician who is also a lactaion consultant in the Alpharetta area, Dr. Kute. http://www.drkute.com/

I have to say I completely, totally, 100% disagree with the woman who said "Definitely wean her. She must start eating a more balanced diet. If she's not filling up on breast milk, she'll get hungry and eat." On the contrary, breast milk has plenty of calories, and you won't find anything healthier. In fact, a common challenge with very young eaters is to make sure they are not eating so much food that they don't have enough breastmilk, bacause that is the optimal food for at least the first year. Now that she's 15 months, that's not so much a problem, and you can feel comfortable offering all kinds of foods. (Except maybe peanuts or things likely to cause an allergic reaction.)

Sleeping through the night:
Your goal is to maximize sleep for everyone in the family, while respecting the needs of your child. Remember that night waking in babies and young children is temporary! Children grow out of night waking, even when we do nothing to discourage it. This period of time will be a very tiny part of your child's years with you.

There are lots of moms who just are not comfortable with the cry-it-out method, so don't feel like that is your only option. (The Dr. Ferber book is the classic cry-it-out book, in case that's the one your doc gave you. I couldn't, wouldn't ever do it, no matter how well it worked, because I don't believe it respects the child's emotional needs. And I LOVE MY SLEEP.) Someone else here mentioned the Elizabeth Pantley book "The No-cry Sleep Solution" - I think that's a very good one. I wouldn't ever be able to do the cry it out - I just couldn't do it.

The kellymom website has excellent infomation on sleeping through the night and gentle methods for night weaning:
http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/sleep.html

Someone also mentioned co-sleeping as a way to keep your sanity. Not for everyone, but that has worked for me, and I NEED my sleep more than anyone I know! The baby wakes up in the middle of the night and starts nudging me, and I am able to roll on my side and let him nurse and both of us fall back asleep in a couple of minutes. If you choose to do that, read up on how to make your bed a safe place so you will have some peace of mind.

I also used to wake up in the night, pick up the baby, and sit on the edge of my bed to nurse him, and I was sooooo tired. Finally one night, I started to fall asleep that way, and nearly dropped the baby on his head and slid off the bed myself. That's the night I just brought him into my bed with me and nursed while lying on my side. I went online the next day to learn how to make sure my bed was going to be safe for him. (Now I have the side of the bed pushed up the wall, and there is a tight roll of beach towels in between the bed and wall so there is no place for him to slip down. He sleeps between me and the wall.)

Nursing and night nursing is still very nutritious for the baby, and very comforting for her as well. It isn't just about the calories she's getting, it also soothes her, calms her, makes her feel safe, and even helps regulate her heartbeat and stress levels. Not just nourishing, it's NURTURING, and these NEEDS are every bit as REAL as the physical needs!

"Your baby will begin to comfort herself and to sleep for longer stretches at her own developmental pace. If your baby wants to nurse at night, it is because she DOES need this, whether it's because she is hungry or because she wants to be close to mom. Sleeping through the night is a developmental milestone (like walking or toilet training) that your baby will reach when she is ready to. Trying to force or coax baby to reach this before her time may result in other problems later on."

"If you can try to take a more relaxed approach and trust that it will come in time, you'll see your baby eventually become a good sleeper. You'll be able to rest peacefully in your heart and mind knowing that she reached this in her own time when she felt secure enough to do so, not because he had no other choice but to quiet herself because no one would come."

"Probably one of the main reasons that night-waking babies are such a big issue is that parents don't have realistic expectations of the sleep patterns of babies. We are bombarded with magazine articles and books that perpetuate the myth that babies should not have nighttime needs. Babies were designed to wake up often at night to feed and cuddle, and keep in mind that many adults wake during the night, too. If our expectations for babies were not so different from our babies' expectations for themselves, much of this "problem" might disappear." (kellymom website)

Seriously, I think it's a huge advantage to be able to nurse your baby back to sleep. It's like a great magic trick, and I feel a little bad for the moms who don't have it as an option (for whatever reason). They have no choice but to get up again and again, or to let the baby cry it out. But for us - baby wakes up and cries - stick a breast in his mouth - baby is IMMEDIATELY quiet and we both fall back asleep. Done!

L., I'm so sorry you're so tired. It can be so hard to sleep poorly for a long time. Have you thought of letting her sleep in your bed so you won't have to wake up all the way for her to nurse? Night nursing shouldn't cause a weight loss, I would think. Maybe help with weight gain, but not loss. She may be eating so much at night because she needs more calories.

You may want to have a nice calming time before bedtime and make it fairly regular. Don't stress over schedules, but try and keep things kind of regular. Have certain things you do before bedtime to help her wind down.

She only eats fruit? Nothing else? Maybe you could make fruit recipes and slowly add other things in, such as cream cheese, etc. Maybe you could let her 'help you cook,' by stirring or putting in ingredients and then she'd be interested in eating it. Maybe you and dad could talk to one another about how much you like a certain food, but not offer her any unless she asks for it.

For your comfort and her sense of security, I would encourage you to wean slowly and when needed. It sounds as if she is getting all her protein from the breastmilk. If you wean her, you'll be *trying* to substitute with a food that's not as good for her as your breastmilk. What if she won't take your substitute? How much weight will she lose then? So, if you weaned suddenly, she'd be feeling bereft of the warmth and cuddling in your arms and be hungrier, too. Not to mention how much milk you'd have in your breasts. I suspect you give more than you know.

Just some thoughts,
D. S, mom to 5

Hi L.- I too- did not sleep for the first year of my third sons life...it was extremely hard to raise a family on no sleep - so I feel your pain. My advice would be to wean your baby from breast feeding - thats WAY too often for child that old to nurse- it is for comfort only!!! offer water in sippy cups and keep offering food- one day she'll take it- my son is now 17 mos and he is picky- it is typical at this age to be picky eaters - not to mention they are developing and teething- which makes them more irritable and causes middle of the night wakings...the most important thing for you to do is stop the frequent nursing and let her cry in the middle of the night - it will take 7 days MAX (maybe just 3 or 5)but she will learn to sleep- this is wha tI eventually had to do with my son- I didn't let him cry because I was afraid he would wake the other 2 children....he did a few times- but after 4 nights- he was sleeping thru the night and I cannot tell youwhat a differnce it has made for me - he sleeps 12 hours a night and takes one 2 hour nap- it's wonderful!!
Good Luck to you. please email if you any other questions.
Nikki Kenney

I can completely understand where you are coming from as I went through the same thing with my youngest. Truthfully, at 15 months nursing is about comfort, not need. I finally got to the point where I had to wean my daughter from nursing through the night. She still nursed to go to sleep but not throughout the night. It was hard the first couple of nights, I was exhausted. My daughter fussed and cried for long periods of time but after about 3 nights of this she eventually got used to not nursing and she slept better. The other problem that we discovered with our daughter was that she needed tubes put in her ears. I'm not saying that your child will need to have this done but for us, she was having chronic ear infections and colds and wouldn't gain weight even tough she ate constantly. We finally saw an ENT specialist and had the tubes put in her ears. Now she sleeps much better and only has a few nights when she won't sleep all the way through. You might find that once you wean, she will start drinking milk and eating other foods. Breast milk is slightly sweet so she may not want regular milk until she is no longer nursing. My youngest did the same thing to me. Wouldn't drink it until we weaned and now she loves it. As for how to wean, honestly it might be easier to just stop rather than a slow withdrawal. It's hard for the first couple of days but they do eventually understand and you will be a better Mommy for it. I know I was.

My older daughter started losing weight at 6 months and we've gone for monthly weight checks at the Dr's office for about 2 years. She's fine now, but after MANY Dr's appointments and seeing a specialist, the biggest helps were these: (sorry I can't adise regarding breastfeeding...)
1. keep her on a rigid schedule throughout the day as far as meals go. Every 2 1/2 hours or so she should have a mini-meal. Focus on proteins and carbs, with at least 2 servings each of fruits/veggies/grains/dairy. A strong schedule has taught her to eat rather than her appetite. At night, I was told to give her just water to fill her tummy but not give her calories (to help her body adjust to caloric intake during the days) ... and she eventually didn't bother waking anymore.
2. Dont bother with Pediasure if you've been considering it. It's way too expensive. The specialist told us to use Carnation Instant Breakfast in whole milk once a day. (Maybe 10 cents a day versus $1.50 per day for pediasure) It provides the exact same nutrition but costs less - and comes in more flavors.
3. Not sure about a 15 month old, but when she turned 2, we were told to put her on a multi-vitamin.
Talk to your ped about these options to see if they're right for your little one. Now my daughter looks healthy and even has some "baby fat" appearing around her cheeks.

My son also would not drink milk, white milk. Now I put strawberry syrup in it and we call it a milkshake and he loves it. Have you tried to flavor the milk? You said she likes fruit, strawberry flavor it and see. As far as nursing, if she is thirsty, she will drink what you offer. I know you are tired and this could be a little hard but that is what I do with my son. I offer him something and he either drinks it or it sits there until he does, of course milk is put in the fridge to wait. Eventually he gets thirsty and will drink it or eat the item I give. He also wouldn't sleep during the night because he wasn't getting enough in his belly to keep him satisfied all night. I gave him extra food and then he started sleeping longer. Hope this helps. Good luck!

Giving fruit gets them addicted to the taste of sugary foods. I would definitely wean her. She must start eating a better balanced diet. If she is not filling up on breast milk and fruit she will get hungry and eat. Most are eating meals from the table by this age. This may be her way of maintaining control in the family by your worrying about her eating Put the food in front of her and ignore her. Most things can be cut into proper bites that she can feed herself with her hands. If she makes a mess, she will wash so don't worry about it. The more attention she can get over eating issues the more she will have. V.

Wow! You are a super mom, running a household with no sleep is imposible! Have u tried a sound mashine? They have some pretty cool onec with like the sounds of ocean or waterfall...I heard it works for some children. My son have been sleeping through the night by 4 months and thats when I got my brain and energy back!lol What we did: Put her down in her crib, give her a kiss and a passy, turn ALL the lights off, shut the door and walk away. It was hard listen to her crying, so I would turn the monitor off. Wait 5 min. If he is still crying, go in her room, give her a soft kiss, her passy , say I love you, and walk away. Wait 10 min. If she is still crying do the same thing! Repeat in 15, 20 min...And dont pick her up! We did this for 3 nights and it worked! Whoo hoo, i sleep all night now! Good luck!

Hi L.,
My little girl is 15 1/2 mos and as well is still not sleeping through the night, I can very much relate to you on that. I have tried it all and nothing seems to work.
I don't have too much insight to give you on what helps, but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone.
I wasn't able to nurse long so I am not sure I can offer you any support on how to end it. I was going to mention that if she doesn' like the whole milk, maybe give her Soy milk, my little one likes them both. Also she went through a spell when she didn't want the whole milk either, I then started to flavor it with the Nestle Strawberry and she loved it. Also, the pedia sure is a real good weight gainer! Mine eats everything in sight but loves fruit as well! I hope you find the answers you are looking for!

My younger 2 nursed in to there second and third year,I would keep nursing her because from that she not only gets nurishment but also comfort.My youngest daughter was tiny and both if them were picky eaters, If you feed her baby food try mixing the friut with anything else she is eating that way she gets what she wants and you can make sure she eats a variety.I would also try finger foods like vienna sausages,chicken nuggets,french fries,and things like that.If her weight continues to bother you, the Doctor gave my daughter Pediasure for awhile.Through the day does she take a lot of naps if so wean her off them keep her up more during the day, and when she fusses at night let her cry it out for a bit and see if she might go right back to sleep.

Can not believe your pediatrican would not help you!!! Anyway try giving her a bottle befoere bedtime with som cereal on it so it will hold her thru most of the night Secondly little by little try introducing your baby to pancakes, milkshaes, etc so hopefully she will gain some weght

Hi L.,
I feel your pain girl! My 15 1/2 month old son isn't sleeping through the night, either. Unfortunately I wasn't able to nurse him for very long...up until about 3 months ago he would wake up every 2 to 3 hours and demand a bottle and when I mentioned this the the Dr at his 12 mos check up he told me to stop it cold turkey. He told me to try and give him a bottle of water and he warned me that he would throw it at me, which he did! we went through this for about 4-5 days and he seemed to be sleeping better but now he wakes up usually when I am going to bed and stays up for upto 5 hours just being fussy, he dosen't want a bottle(I tried) I think he is just a restless sleeper which in turn makes me a restless sleeper because I hear EVERYTHING. One thing that was reccommended to me was to have my husband get up with him because he doesn't associate him with feeding and whenever my husband would do that he would go back to sleep very easily but unfortunately he doesn't get up with him very often. I'm sorry I can't be of much help..but know that you aren't the only one!

M.
p.s. if you figure out the secret PLEASE let us know!!!

Hi L.,
I am the mother of a 13 month old. I have a similar situation, but I am trying a new approach this week. First of all, my daughter co sleeps, so her frequent nursings were no big deal. recently I became tired of feeling like a nurse drive through so decided to make her sleep in her bed.
Now, she doesnt sleep through the night, but to train her to sleep through the night, here is what I am doing. (Last night was the first night that I didnt put her in my bed after she woke up the first time.)

I feed and nurse her b4 I put her in the bed. Once in the bed, I tell her to lay down and normally she complies. I then pat her back for about 5 minutes until she goes to sleep.

If she doesnt go to sleep w/i 5 minutes or so, I leave her in there and she cries(screams) for 3-20 minutes. Usually with no tears.
THIS IS WHAT I TRIED LAST NIGHT
When she woke up in the night, the first time I nurseed her and put her back in the crib. The second time I told her to lay down. I patted her and she was sleep in about 1 minute. The third time she woke up I did the same.

Finally she awoke at 5 am and just wanted to scream and I was in a bad mood by this point. SO I asked her if she wanted to get dressed. I washed her up got her dressed then we both went back to sleep in the family bed.(I have to leave out by 7:15) for work and I figured if she wasnt going to go back to sleep at least I could get her dressed and not reinforce the idea that if she screams long enough I'll pick her up.

The funny thing is when I say go to sleep, she plops down in sleeping position but she pops right back up.

I dont know if this helps you. But my main point is do not nurse everytime she wakes up. Just provide comfort and encourage her to go back to sleep.

Just be prepared for your daughter to complain a LOT when you start to change her eating habits. I'm sure she loves the snuggling, nursing, cradling, attention every two hours. If she's nursing every 2 hours at night, her metabolism is staying revved up. You are going to have to wean her off that. By 15 months, she should only really be getting a nursing first thing in the morning as a "good morning" and/or last thing at night as a "good night" but definitely not all night! You poor thing!

Try feeding her a filling dinner at night and a last nursing before bed. For the first week, only nurse her every 4 hours. For the next week, only nurse her once in the night. After that, no nursing.

It will be a hard transition. She will cry A LOT -- but you are not harming her. You will be teaching her better sleeping habits and helping her to get into a healthier eating habit too.

Be sure during the day to feed her healthy food. Not just fruit -- too much sugar and not enough of the other things her body needs! Breast milk is sweet, too -- she is developing a sweet tooth, I think. It will be so good for her to learn that other healthy foods are good to eat -- and you'll be establishing good habits for life.

Nursing her is fine -- but not all the time. By 15 months, nursing is more about connecting with mom and less about receiving actual nourishment for her body. She needs to be eating "real food" for that. Whole cow milk, cheeses, yogurts, eggs, whole grain breads. You can try (with your pediatrician's okay) putting Carnation Instant Breakfast in her milk to "fatten her up" -- I did that with my daughter because I was worried about her not eating enough.

If your pediatrician isn't helpful in this area (shame on her, by the way), ask for a referral to a nutritionist. Balancing the diet is VERY important.

Good luck!

I went through this with my son. He was nursing every couple of hours at night until he was 20 months old. He weaned himself during the day, but was still dependent on those night feedings to get back to sleep. (I think he wanted the comfort, not the nourishment.) I finally couldn't take it anymore, and just quit cold turkey. There were about 3 horrible nights where he cried and cried, but I just held him and rocked him until he fell back asleep. Ever since then, he has been sleeping through the night with no problems!
My son lost weight around this time period as well, but he has a lot of food allerigies and the doctor said that is normal. He was losing weight, but gaining height, so the doc wasn't concerned. Good luck!!!

Try giving her an avocado right before bedtime. We did that when our daughter was about that age, and it helped her sleep through the night. Good luck!

first hugs L..
Second let me give you some history. I'm the SAHM of 2 kiddos , and I did the same thing with both of um, One slept through the night at 3 years , yes you read that right 3 YEARS. The other at 12 months. For books I'd recomend The no cry sleep solution by elizabeth Pantley. very good book many people have done well with it. I have NO attention span so I just can follow a plan to the letter, I did do some of the suggested things in the book though. I've found that kids will sleep through the night when they are ready. and for tha nightly feeding I would give her a sippy cup or bottle of water. And when switching to Whole milk you need to do it gradually, mixing her milk with breast milk with a stronget and stronger miture each day till its all whole milk.

Hello L.,

I also nursed my daughter on demand until she was about 14 months old. I decided to "night wean" her because I, like you, was exhausted. But, I continued to nurse her during the day.

This is how we did it. I noticed that dd could sleep until midnight some nights so I decided that no matter when she woke up I wouldn't nurse her until midnight. Instead my husband would rock, sing, cuddle her back to sleep. It helped that he has always done the bedtime routine with her so she was used to falling asleep with him. Soon I noticed that she could sleep some nights until 2am - so I held of nursing until then. Later she slept until 5am most nights and finally she was sleeping through the night. I'd say the entire process took 3-4 weeks.

We have also experienced a similar problem with dd's weight. She started off well but my 9 months old had completely dropped off of the weight chart.

I want to share two things with you.

1) Please look at the height and weight charts from the World Health Organization (WHO). They use a much larger sample and are more representative of 'normal' for breastfed babies. According to the WHO charts dd has always been just fine and I suspect that your baby is fine too.

2) I respectfully dissagree with your pediatrician. I don't think that nursing is the cause for "underweight" babies. I don't think that substituting cow's milk for human milk is the answer. Since your daughter likes fruit, I suggest that you make high calorie, high fat fruit smoothies for her. You can add flax seed oil, tofu and later peanut butter. My daughter LOVES smoothies. I typically leave one out for her while she plays and without even knowing it she can drink 16 oz and several hundred calories.

I hope that helps!
E.

I would try to wean her off first. Then do what you must to get weight on her. Try different textures of foods, baby foods, etc. My son loved oatmeal with fruit in it. You can put the fruit in a blender or puree it and then mix it in with the oatmeal. His favorite is apples and cinnamon and maple and brown sugar. Instant oatmeal....he doesn't care for the plain...

The trick someone told me was to pack your child full of food before bedtime. I nursed my oldest, but I also pumped breastmilk for when I was at work or we had a sitter (i.e. Grammy), so I know how those little interruptions for nursing can keep you exhausted.

At about 3 months, we started by giving her a bottle of breastmilk with some rice cereal to thicken it. Then, once she was on solid foods, I would give her a TON of cereal and veggies before bedtime, and then nurse her just a little to help her sleep.

I hope this helps!
-M.

Hi L.,

Don't apologize for your English! :) It's quite good!

First of all, you may have a smaller milk supply than you had before and it's not satisfying her as well as it once did. Make sure her tummy is full before you put her to bed at night.

Next, make sure nothing is stimulating her during the night. Laundry detergent, Chlorine bleach, etc that the sheets are washed in mess with the brain and DO stimulate. If that is the reason she is waking up, it might just be habit that is causing her to want to nurse. That's a simple, inexpensive fix if that is the problem.

If she won't eat anything but sugar (fruit), you may need to wean her off of it. Does her tongue have a slight white residue on it? If it does then she has a nutritional issue with yeast. That will irritate and stimulate and cause cravings for only sugars. It's not a dangerous thing unless it goes too long.

If you would like to talk more on any of these things or want more detailed information, please let me know. I would love to help!

Regards,

M.

Oh man. I am so sorry. I have a 4 month old who doesnt' sleep and still nurses a ton at night and I know how exhausted I am. Can't imagine how bad you must feel! We are actually trying "sleep training" tonight. I read a few sleep books but the one I liked best and that a friend of mine has used successfully is "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Ferber. There is a ton of great info in there, including not only how to sleep train, but how to deal with too frequent night feedings that you might find useful. One of my friend's son also has weight gain trouble and she has started giving him yo-baby yogurt. Have you tried that? Her doctor recommended it.
Good luck to you!

For the sleep issue....please know that this is usually a problem for moms who nurse....I have four children and eventually there is a problem with sleeping vs. eating. I think that we moms think they are hungry and the baby really needs the comfort of nursing to get to sleep. AND eventually practically all of us have to do SOMETHING to sleep ourselves. I have always had great luck with DR. FERBER. His suggestions seem harsh, but THEY WORK very well. My first baby (now 12) used to be able to cry all the way to his grandparents house--5 1/2 hours away. I thought he would cry all night. I knew I could not take it! I followed the rest of Dr. Ferber's suggestions (the book is "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Ferber) and I was sleeping through the night immediatly and within three days he would go to bed without a peep!!

Make sure your nutrition is GREAT so that your milk is nourishing to your child. Also, you might pump and see if cereal made with breast milk is better for her. Keep trying with new foods. Sometimes they will not like it for ten tries and love it on the eleventh. It also, unfortunately works in reverse too. Just keep trying!

This reminds me of when we took the bottle away from my now 20 mo old...21 days ago. I nursed her for 11 mo, but stopped cold turkey. I had a deep cut on my nipple (invisible to me)I went to pump and blood gushed out. I told my husband...just bottles. it was a fight, but we made it. The bottle/being on the breast sometimes can cause your LO to not want to eat anything. We were livid. All she wanted was milk and her diapers were mushy. So when we took her to her Pediatrican on 4/4, the doc simply told her. No more bottle, it is for the baby, my 11 week old. She said that if we had to give her a bottle of water, not milk if she hollered for it. So we braved a lot of hollering for like 4 days and NOW she sleeps TOTALLY through the night and eats like a horse.

When my daughter was around 14 months old, she was very similar in waking up every 1-2 hours to nurse. I did the Jay Gordon method of night-weaning her. Basically you choose a 7 hour block of time during the night when nursing if off limits. Here is a link - http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp
The first week was tought with my little one, but then she started sleeping all 7 hours! I was amazed and so rested!
You don't have to wean entirely for this sleep problem if you don't want to. My daughter is 22 months and still nurses during the day, but it is off limits at night. (now off limits for the whole 10 hours of night).
As far as her weight goes, keep trying the whole milk and also avacados and peanut butter (if there are no nut allergies in your family). But also, is your dr. supportive of extended nursing? Make sure you are going to a doc who is in line with the World Health Organization (who recommends nursing until 2). Many docs in this country recommend weaning at 1 (either explicitly or implicitly), and are going against all scientific research when they give that advice....
Best of luck to you! It DOES get better! :)

Have you tried contacting someone in La Leche League? If you look on their website, you can search for a La Leche League group in your area. you can then go to meetings or simply ask the leader questions. I have found this group to be most helpful with my breastfeeding questions/issues. I think you will find some helpful insight here.
Good luck!

Hi L.,

I don't know if any of my suggestions will help you- hopefully something will.

My baby girl is still not sleeping through the night and she is about to turn one in two weeks, so I feel your pain. I also have a two year old who didn't sleep through the night until 13 months.

What I am trying with my baby is to get her to sleep longer stretches. She was just like your little one, nursing all night long. I began weaning her this month to formula in a bottle because I, like you, felt like I could not handle the exhaustion any more. I thought if she was taking a bottle it would be easier to switch to the whole milk gradually once she turns a year old. Will your baby take a bottle at all? You could try just starting with one ounce of whole milk mixed with expressed breast milk or formula, and then gradually increasing the amount of milk while decreasing the amount of formula until she is hopefully tolerating milk. Also make sure it is just slightly warm, the same temperature of breastmilk. I feed my daughter before her bedtime and before my bedtime I feed her again. Even if she is sleeping, I nurse (or bottle feed) her to top her off. She will eat in her sleep. This way I can get a longer stretch of uninterrupted sleep. Then I try to hold off on feeding her later in the night as long as possible. Will your hubby help get her back to sleep without you? Try www.kellymom.com and also www.askdrsears.com for suggestions on night weaning. Or for that matter, you could google "night weaning" and see what you come up with. If you are persistent you can stretch out her sleep a little at a time until she is able to sleep longer and longer amounts.

As for the weight loss, it may be her diet but there also might be something else going on. I would definitely find an answer to this part, and if your pediatrician can't help you, I would find someone else who can make sure everything else is normal. It is not normal for her to be losing weight. Like one of the other moms said, it could be that your milk supply is lower and she is nursing so often to try to get what she needs. Does she like to feed herself? Have you tried the mesh feeders that you can get at Walmart or Target in the baby feeding section, where you put the food in and she can hold it herself? If she likes fruit, you could try making a smoothie with fruit, milk, and yogurt in a blender, then freezing in ice cube trays. Then you put a cube in the feeder and let her feed herself. It is in a mesh bag so she cannot choke. You can do the same with melons, bananas, or other fruit frozen or not. Will she eat cheese or whole milk yogurt? These are high in fat but healthy. Avocado is another food that is high in healthy fat. You could try dips with her fruit to add calories made with yogurt, cream cheese. Will she eat eggs? Egg salad sandwiches, grilled cheese sandwiches, quesadillas, pasta and sauce are other higher fat foods. Try to think of anything you could add to any of the foods she WILL eat that will boost the calorie content. This is of course if there are no other issues preventing her from gaining weight.
I wish you and your daughter the best. Try to take it one day at a time, give yourself permission to lower your standards on the things that are non essential as you are dealing with sleep deprivation. This will pass, one day soon. :) Hang in there! Hugs and blessing to you and your sweet baby girl.
T.

Hi L.,

Once my baby weighed 12 lbs, my doctor said that he was physiologically capable of sleeping through the night without a feeding. So there were many nights when we let our baby cry in order to train him to sleep through the night- starting around 4 months old. If they do not eat at night, then they will be forced to make it up during the day (eat more during the day). I don't know your exact situation, especially since your baby is losing weight but based on what I know, I would suggest NOT going into her room every time she cries. Try it for three nights in a row and see if she catches on. Since she is feeding so often, perhaps she is not getting the hindmilk (more nutritious milk) and only the foremilk (less calories)...I don't know. But I do know that for many babies, sleeping through the night is not natural, it takes some training...which is much harder on the mom and dad than on the baby.

It sounds like you are a very loving mom!
C.

my 14 month old at the time was getting up between 3-5 times a night as well. in the beginning she was getting up only 1 time which i could manage to nurse but then it turned into several times and i couldn't go in there only once to nurse. she wouldn't understand. i finally, at my wits end and exhausted, had to just let her cry herself back to sleep. it was a rough few nights and i had to just turn the monitor off. she shares a room with her brother and he would still sleep right through it. that is about the only way you are going to get her to sleep through the night. i know it may sound mean but in the long run your child will be happier and healthier from sleeping through the night and you will be a much nicer mommy and wife. she is now 19 months and sleeps all night with an occasional waking and a rare cry. i am still nursing her as well. good luck. also, my daughter's name is L. as well : )