15 Month Old Son Thinks "No" Is Funny....?????

Updated on February 06, 2009
J.B. asks from Plano, TX
15 answers

I have a very happy son that loves to laugh and play, but when he does something bad like hit me, pull my hair or throw his sippy cup hard on the floor he really needs to know these things are bad. I firmly tell him no and say that we don't hit, etc, but he thinks its funny. I'm going to head to B&N for a book, but I was curious how any of you mama's have dealt with it.

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

My son is now 16 months old. My older son is 3. Totally typical. He has no real idea of what's going on, except he thinks is hilarious that you sometimes do this "new" face with this "no" word. It's hilarious to him. He's just now learning about what is appropriate and when. A lot of babies this age also like saying "no" a lot themselves because they hear it so much. When my baby hits me (usually I hold him). I say "gentle" and show him how to touch gently. Or if he continues to hit. I say "no hitting" and I put him down. He loves me to carry him around so putting him down is an immediate consequence to hitting. He picked up on it pretty quickly. Hope this helps!

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

Mine was hitting at this age; and thought "no" was funny as well. A bit frustrating. I used time out - that seemed to make the difference. Gave a her a warning using "no hitting". Most of the time she would ignore the warning and hit again and laugh. I put her in time out for 1 minute. Now the first couple of times I did it; I put my back to her so that she wouldn't see my face. Then I would kind of glance out of the corner of my eye b/c I knew that she would try to get up. I would just march her back Super Nanny style without saying a word. Eventually she got the idea and she would sit for a minute. Now she just turned two and time out works like a charm. If she does a behavior that is not allowed, I warn her that she will go into time out if she continues the behavior. She usually listens to the warning. I really have to put her in time out very little. Maybe 1-2 times a month, maybe. Which is awesome for a toddler. I just remember how frustrating this age was with discipline! Good luck.

Also, I forgot to add that I would really focus on the positive behavior. For example if she was doing somthing like drinking her sippy cup nicely. I would make a huge deal- lots of smiles and hugs. If she would throw her sippy cup, I would just take it away. The hitting thing is when I would use time out b/c I had no other recourse or action that I could take.

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

Your son is so very very normal but this stuff is frustrating. I would say firmly, "I can't hold you/play with you when you hit me" and walk away quickly. He's exploring so many things at this time, including how his hands work, how mama will react, etc.

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C.S.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J.. Boys are boys and what rascal's they are! :)
Wait until he repeats back to you and tells you no. Rascal's.

Try this:
1. say gently "no, no baby" - no harsh No's and remove what it is that he is wreaking havoc on and then move on.
2. Always be respectful when speaking to him, always as you would another adult or person at your work. So when he starts repeating you it is not "NO!" but "No please momma". or "No no Momma" or "Please don't." I hear so many people talking so disrespectful to their kids it makes me sad. We all have our moments but remember - they are little parrots and will repeat everything you say.
~~
He will learn to manage his actions soon enough. When my son was that age my husband cried out in desperation asking "When will this be over?" I said "Four." And it was. So you too have a way to go so hang in there and you'll be just fine.
Don't forget to do something for yourself or join a kiddy group and meet other mom's to keep you sane and balanced.
Don't forget to ask the momma source mom's what to do instead (like jumping on the couch cushions)to distract him from his moments of havoc.
Good luck and enjoy~~at least he's not dull. C.

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S.C.

answers from Dallas on

My son does the same thing. He has been doing it since about a year and he is 22 mos. now. Lately, he seems to be throwing tantrums when I tell him no or stop with a firm voice....which is a change from laughing but not as fun for mommy. But at least he is getting it more....I hope. I was just like you- SO FRUSTRATED- when he would laugh at us when we were serious. I think it is just a normal phase though. We figured that he just didn't know how to react when we were serious because of his age. They are still trying to figure stuff out. Just don't give in on the non-negotiable stuff (like dangerous things) and he will soon figure it out. Just wait until his reaction is to burst into tears and fall to the floor. LOL At least you can see that they are starting to get it then. Hang in there!

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S.G.

answers from Dallas on

My little boy is 16 months, and does the exact same thing. I am also a full time working mom, so there is the factor of what they do at daycare to combat issues (at this age, probably nothing. I completely agree with picking your battles. My problem is my little boy has the cutest little dimples, so I end up laughing too!! (horrible I know). So, things that aren't that big of a deal (i.e. throwing the cup on the floor, turning the TV off and on, making a mess at dinner), I don't even try right now. As for more serious things (i.e. hitting, biting, fingers in electric outlets), I firmly tell him "don't hit, don't bite, HOT!" and walk away (usually because I know I'll laugh if he does). That way he hasn't gotten the reaction he is seeking from me, and those things just aren't as fun to laugh about by himself. I've done this for about a month and have noticed a HUGE improvement. Hope this helps :)

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

A MUST read is "To Train Up a Child" by Michael Pearl. It's less than $5 and will change your (and your child's) life!

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S.C.

answers from Dallas on

When my oldest was that age, he said no all the time to me because I said it so much. I got smarter with my next boy and instead of constantly telling him "no", I'd say, "you're not making good choices right now". Then I would tell/show him what a good choice would be or ask him what he could do different to make it a good choice.

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M.K.

answers from Dallas on

Thinking "no" is funny is normal for children, but it's what happens after that's important. We are firm believers in time out even at a young age. The rule we always stick to is one minute per age of the child. Trust me this is enough time. We would put our daughter on the floor in the middle of the room (away from all toys) and let her either scream or cry it out. Then we'd go talk to her and explain that what she did was unacceptable and if she did again she'd end up back in time out. It only took a couple of times for her to realize we were serious. Sometimes it sucks but you have to stick to your guns don't back down or "threaten" punishment always follow through or they'll figure out your bluff and start trying to run the show!

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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

time to start time out. It won't be so funny to him if he gets no reaction from you, just placed into timeout. After his 90 seconds of time out tell him why he was there and have him hug you and learn to say "forgive me?" or "I'm sorry" (I personally prefer forgive me because kids get really flipppant about sorry as they get older. He won't get it at first, but he'll pick up on it very very quickly. This is the age when we started with my daughter. At first she thought it was new and fun, but she got the idea quick.

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

Since you are headed to the bookstore, I recommend The Happiest Toddler on the Block by Harvey Karp. It is a huge help!
Firmly separating yourself from him when he hits you and exagerrating your facial expression to show that he hurt you should get the point across that unpleasant behavior has unpleasant consequences.

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

"when he does something bad like hit me, pull my hair or throw his sippy cup hard on the floor"
You need to put an immediate stop to this kind of behavior. Accompany "NO" with sitting him in time out for about 2-3 minutes. He will soon learn that his poor behavior is not tolerated. Also if you use a stern look and voice each time he thinks "no" is funny he will get the message that Mommy means business.

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V.T.

answers from Dallas on

All kids tend to go through that stage. And they will react that way b/c what you are doing to tell them no doesn't affect them or "hurt" them in some way. I personally slap their hands when I say no so that it gets their attention. You might try putting them in time out for a few mintues. I think it is a big deal b/c they are learning that what you tell them doens't really matter which can be a big problem to fix in later years! I would recommend the book Shepharding a child's heart. Good luck!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Then don't use no, say stop and tell him it hurts to be hit and leave it at that. He is really too little to understand much more. Also, make sure you use an authoritative voice and walk away if he begins to laugh. He'll get the message.

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

Welcome to toddlerhood! Both of my kids thought/think it's hilarious when I get onto them! My oldest is 8 now, so she knows trouble when she hears it now, but my 15 month old will laugh, and go right back into doing what she was doing before, but of course now it's MORE fun because she gets a reaction out of me. I pick my battles, and realize that she's just exploring her world and the cause and effect of her actions. If she's doing something dangerous, I swat her on the hand, but otherwise, I just re-direct her and get her interested in something new, and "ok" to do. Good luck! Time-outs aren't effective until about 18 months old, so just try to deal until then.

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