13 Month Old Crys When I Leave

Separation anxiety is normal at this age. You might let him take a favorite toy with him. When my son was little, he went to Mom's Day Out. I would have to kiss him on both cheeks before I left. I told him if he missed me, he could touch his cheek where I had kissed it and remember that I would be back soon. I have heard of moms who would leave a lipstick print on the child's hand or cheek and tell them that as long as the lipstick was there, mommy would be back soon. I didn't want to leave lipstick on him because I was afraid he would freak out if it got wiped off. Try reading books such as "The Kissing Hand" and other books about mommy leaving and coming back. Always tell him "bye" when you leave. If you ever try to sneak away while he is playing, he will learn not to trust you and will be more afraid every time you leave the room to do anything. Good luck!

It sounds like your son is going through separation anxiety, which is very common in kids his age especially those with stay-at-home moms. My son went through it too. My husband and I were able to break him in about 2.5 weeks by doing the following. As soon as my husband would get home from work I would leave for 10 minutes then come back. Every day we increased the time by a few minutes until we reached one hour. After several days my son finally understood that when I left I would eventually come back; however, he does need to wave goodbye to us at the door and watch us drive away. Maybe a neighbor could help you with this so your son would be in his own surroundings. I know it's hard, but hang in there.

I have a 16 month old that does this same thing when I leave. The best thing to do is pretty much what you're already doing. Dropping him off a little early so that you can sit with him for a little bit is great. What I do when it's time to leave is I get my mother-in-law (or whoever may be watching him) to take him in the back somewhere and get him interested in something back there. I sneak out as quietly as I can, and he never even realizes I'm gone till much later, and by then he's ok. Please don't feel guilty for leaving him. You have to work to support him and yourself. You have to think of it that way. He will be fine. No child has ever died from crying.

B.,
that's an awful feeling to have to go and leave your baby, however you do have to do it. Have you tried maybe leaving something of your with him. I know he is really too young to understand that you'll be back. Have you tried leaving him then waiting about 2-3 minutes then going back and forth, maybe he'll get used to seeing you go, but know that you;ll be back. If you have to go to work, say you leave about 30 minutes early, to take him wherever, try stepping out about 2-3 minutes then go back to him and try that several times before its really time for you to go. Its gonna take some time for him to get used to you, do have to have patience and time..

I completely understand what you are going threw. With my first son there was a divorce and it is unbelievably hard on them no matter how young they are. They seem to understand that daddy has left and not only will they suffer from seperation anxiety they will also have abandonment issues as well. As little as he is he saw daddy leave and not come back and he probably has a fear that mommy will do the same. Your all he has and he is obviously incredibly attached which is great for you but extremely difficult for him to deal with. As he gets older try to place him somewhere with lots of other children. You being a single parent now there are daycares that will work around your earnings to help you better afford it. After my son was put into daycare he changed so much. He was always a little upset when I would leave but the other children started coming up to console him and he soon got really attached to his new friends and just forgot about mommy leaving. Leaving them with family is great but other kids always seem to change them positivly.

Sorry honey-

It is the plight of the working mother. Guilt. THen you feel guilty because you leave them all day and by the time you get home it is time for dinner, bath and bed. There was a new report on how some working mothers are cooping. Some are telecommuting, making their own businesses. But I can't do those things so, My children will just have to know that I love them more than anything but I have to work to feed them.

Your son has separation anxiety, but the second he gets over it you will wonder why he is not crying for you. Then you will go through a guilt there and think he does not need you anymore. But that is not true. You can't win for loosing. But keep your head up. One day our kids are going to grow up to be huge succesful, happy well rounded people, who may be rich and take care of us(perk) so press on.
H.

its seperation anxity "sorry spelling" just let him cry. Just say I love I will see you later bye bye. And go to work he will get used to it. Its not cold and heartless, yes you feel guilty but just let it go it will be all right. good luck

I don't leave my son often but at this age I did attend some classes and so I left him twice a week. I found that saying bye bye to him and letting him have a minute to say bye (not really speak) but love on him and then leaving helped a lot. I tried the sneaking out the door and I could hear him cry as soon as he realized I wasn't there. Maybe you could start a routine where you sit him on your lap and you read a certain book then tell him Mommy is going and you will be back soon and see how that works. Best of luck!

B. - I feel for you, we went through the same thing at the same age and while it doesn't last forever, it sure feels like it when your angel is the one crying.
If he stops shortly after you leave, then try to drive thru, drop off. Call your ex or your family member when you are around the block and have them come outside and have them take your son out of the car (don't even get out of the car).
Hope this works!

MAYBE YOU COULD TRY TAKING HIM TO DAYCARE, WERE THERE ARE OTHER CHILDREN HIS AGE FOR HIM TO PLAY WITH!! TO KEEP HIS MIND OFF OF YOU NOT BEING THERE!!!