10 Year Old Daughter

A lot of girls get a bit heavy right before they start puberty, at least that's what our pediatrician told me when I had the same concerns about my just turned 9yr old daughter. And sure enough, now that she's almost ten (and definitely starting puberty), she's slimmed down considerably. Some kids tend to grow like that. They'll get chubby, then shoot up and get taller, then get chubby again, then shoot up and get taller. All three of mine are like that! Keep encouraging her to eat nutritiously and get plenty of exercise, choose the sweetness of fruit instead of chocolate for dessert and cut back on processed food and she should be just fine. Or maybe it's time to add an organized sport to her schedule? Team sports are fun, but lots of kids do better at individual sports like tennis or swimming (swimming, in particular, is FANTASTIC for getting strong!). Try to help your daughter see that, in the end, it doesn't matter if she has extra weight around her belly - she's still an awesome person, but if she truly wants to make the effort to get healthier (not "skinnier" or "thinner", please, please don't use those words with her, but healthier and stronger), you will help her by keeping nutritious food in the house and help her choose a sport she would enjoy. Good luck!

If it is just around her tummy and she is active, I would not worry. My daughter gained a little bit of weight around her tummy at that age (and was very active). However, over the next two years, she stretched out and began developing.

I think that this is normal and is her body's way of padding before she shoots up and begins developing. I would not worry about it if it is not due to diet or lack of exercise. I would tell her (and I did tell my daughter) that this is your body's way of preparing it for the changes ahead. If you ease her mind about it, I don't think that she will develop any eating disorders.

Between 10 and 12 is when girls should have a little extra chunk. When shes 13 it will move around into the right places.

Hi R.,

I have 3 girls, one of which is 10 right now. My two other girls are now married and both of them used to struggle with their weight in the pre-teen years.

We happened to run across the most wonderful book that helped them to make the right choices. It is an older book, but it is fabulous! It is called The Stop Light Diet for Children. I just googled it and found it on Amazon for just $1.30 + s/h, so it wouldn't cost you much to check it out. Literally within weeks my girls were able to take off their extra weight and learn that their choices made a difference.

I have to mention that we always focused on being healthy, and being beautiful on the inside, and not on looking like the latest Hollywood hottie. I think there are too many messages out in the world telling our girls they aren't adequate and I think it's my responsibility to remind them of what true beauty is. I'd rather have overweight girls that are beautiful on the inside than a thin daughter whose beauty is only skin deep.

Best wishes to you and your daughter!

~P. G.
LCC, Culture Care Au pair
Owner, Portland Preschool Directory
Author, Mrs. G.'s Kindergarten
http://www.PortlandPreschoolDirectory.com
http://www.MrsGowing.com

If she's not eating veggies, make sure she eats a lot of fruits. Take walks with her a couple of days a week. Reassure her that she is not fat & like the others said it will probably fall off in a couple of years.

As mothers, it is our job to teach our children that they are fine just as they are. if she says my belly is too big, ask according to who? if you focus on her weight then she will focus on her weight and then it will be a problem, an emotional one. I was "pudgy" kid and parents tried to "help" me by telling me I was too big, which just made me feel not good enough, not even for my parents. please show your daughter she is good enough just the way she is.

Hi R.-

I also have a 10 year old daughter. Last year she had a wonderful science teacher who explained that its very normal for kids to have a round tummy. She said its due to all the internal organs not having enough space so the only way they can go is forward. As the child grows taller, the organs gain more room and the tummy smooths out. I don't know if there is a factual basis to her explanation but it sure made my daughter feel better.

You are wise to have eating disorders on your radar. They can start at this age. Focus on eating and exercise to keep your body strong and healthy, not on diets or negativity. Most importantly, set a good example. If she hears you complaining about your body, she will look for the flaws in her own.