My one year old Granddaughter is throwing herself backwards and then hits her head against carpeted floor, my daughter is a first time mom and is allowing her to do this, my concern is can the one year old get a head injury and should we let her continue to throw herself backwards to strike her head ??? Now as to the hitting , grabing and pinching, she like to grab the face and squeeze as well as pinch when she gets upset as well as hits, she only does this to her mother, how should the mother react to it?? I have people come up and tell her to respond to it in the same manner but I would think you strike back in same manner only reenforces that it is okay to hit and pinch? What it the correct matter of handling this daughter and I are not agreeing .
My daughter is yelling OUCH!!!! to let baby know that pinch and hitting is hurting, but she is letting the baby throw herself back and letting the head hit the floor, my thing is she should catch her tell her no Owwie and lay her down no let the baby throw herself back....any advice on this?
An adult should not be hitting and pinching a baby.
Dumb advice from others.
* Note: the "others" I mention are the people referred to in the post, not Mamapedia members.
If it's a tantrum, ignore her. Walk away. On carpet, she's not going to hurt herself.
And I agree with Page W.
hi. I have dealt with some children that would do this kind of behavior you just take them to a carpeted area and walk away and let them do their tantrum after a few times they will learn that throwing their head back hurts and eventaully will stop doing it.
When they hit, pitch, bite, put them down and walk away. If they throw their heads back in protest, oh well. It will pass more quickly if the behavior is ignored.
Tantrums are just so much fun, aren't they.
I would not allow her to throw herself back like that. One day she will do it on tile or wood floors and could hurt herself. When my kids were that age and pinched me I would say loudly "Ow, that hurt." And I would put them down and walk away. If we were out, I would put them in a strolled and ignore the protest.
I have a 14 month old granddaughter who is doing pretty much the same thing! Arching her back, throwing herself backward, and hitting when she doesn't like something. Obviously, when you think she's going to injure herself, you need to protect her from that. As far as the hitting and pinching - one thing we all do, which seems to be effective, is say one firm "NO" and then put her down and walk away. She gets no attention (reinforcement) for this behavior. It seems to help with our little one. She does not like being "left" and cries, comes to us, and we pick her up and tell her she needs to be nice. If it happens again, same thing. I believe it is just a stage, but if the hitting is getting her lots of attention (negative OR positive), she will continue. Ignore the negative, reinforce the positive (as much as is reasonable, that is!). Hope this helps. As soon as this is resolved, there will be something else, so you may as well come up with a plan and stick to it!
I imagine that your daughter sees the signs when your grand daughter is getting ready to hit or pinch...she needs to intervene BEFORE it happens and tell her in a kind, calm voice..."we use gentle touches...don't hurt Mama"...or don't hurt the kitty, or your friend or whomever she is getting ready to hit. Don't get upset...she is just showing frustration over something. She is probably not able to tell you in words yet what she wants or what is upsetting her My grandchildren use basic baby sign language to be able to communicate ( My 14 month old grandson can tell us if he wants "water" or "mama's milk"...if he wants to "eat" or wants "more". It saves a lot of melt downs because we don't have to GUESS what he is wanting...he can communicate with us and let us know what he is needing or wanting. He is also learning signs for different animals, for telling us that he needs to go potty....all sorts of things. More and more parents are teaching their children basic sign language...and I can tell you that it really helps.
I would NOT put her in her crib and let her "cry it out"...that is just going to make her more and more angry, upset and emotional.
As to her throwing herself back and hitting her head....more than likely she is not going to injure herself severely but you can use the same methods as you do with the hitting....you can probably tell when she is getting upset and going to throw herself back...you can pick her up...and just talk softly to her, comfort her and try to see if you can figure out what is upsetting her.
These are all signs that she is upset and frustrated or dealing with new emotions that she just simply doesn't know how to express.
My youngest is 11 months and he loves to pinch and grab faces roughly, he smiles while he does it! I always say no no do nice to mama(or brother or dada whoever he is assulting). We usually grab is hands if we see it coming but sometimes we get caught off gaurd so that is where the do nice comes into play, I usually make his hands rub my face nicely. He thinks its all a big funny game but he is also just a baby and really doesn't know anybetter but you have to start reaching young. I don't know about the throwing back my kids never did that. I don't think she will seriously hurt herself though but I am not an expert I'm just assuming. Your daughter should call her pediatrician on that one,
A one yr old gets frustrated because they have no language skills. Those tantrums are a phase but if it is predictable I would probably not let her throw herself back like that, I'd put her in her crib until her tantrum passed.
You are a nice Grandma for worrying about this! :) I just wanted to add another vote for NOT using physical discipline (pinching, hitting, whatever) with a child this age (or any age, really), particularly for something like this. Not only will it teach her that hitting/pinching is indeed ok (and that bigger, stronger people hit little people) but it's also mean-spirited because she is not trying to do anything wrong. She is a baby, and has discovered something that gets a reaction. I agree with the walking away idea. I also know alot of people who have had luck with the "nice touches" approach. Not sure what to say about the banging her head-sounds like it has the potential to be harmful so I would have her call her pediatrician for suggestions. With all of this, I would encourage your daughter to go out of her way to provide lots and lots of snuggles and positive attention when baby is not doing these things, because it sounds like she is sure wanting some attention from mommy!
