My son will be two June 5th. My strong not afraid of anything has started to become scared of things. It started when I took him to see the Easter Bunny at the mall. OK DUMB IDEA but once again my son never showed signs of being afraid of anything. SCARED HIM TO DEATH. He still asks me every day "Easter Bunny all gone". I have talked to him in great length about the Easter Bunny is all gone, he is never coming back, I would never let anything happen to you, mommy will be here to protect you, blah blah blah....Still asks me. OK I can deal with the Easter bunny questions. He is the real problem....My grandma is on oxygen. Never bothered my son and we visit her often. He always is very excited to see her and visit her. Well about 2 weeks ago, she had to do a breathing treatment with a oxygen mask. Well needless to say flipped him right out. He wanted to go home and acted a little scared. He still gave her a kiss goodbye so I didn't think much of it. Then we had a family get together for Mother's day and my grandma was of course there. OH BOY! Tears, trembeling, white in the face and wouldn't even be in the same room with her. My son is afraid of my grandma. I don't know what to do. I have tried talking to him and it is a no go. She called to talk to him last night because it is bothering her too. He wouldn't talk to her because he was instantly scared. Then when I hung up with her he told me he didn't like her. This is breaking my heart. Any suggestions.
She also took her oxygen off on Sunday and tried to talk to him but it didn't work.
Just wanted to let you all know that last Sunday we went to visit my grandmother and he wasn't scared of her. For weeks and weeks we talked daily about how much fun grandma is, how funny she is, how much we love her, oxygen helps grandma breathe and so on. It WORKED! He was a little apprehensive at first but warmed right up. I am very blessed to still have her around so we need to visit her often. I am so happy. Thank you for all your advise. It is much appreciated.
It will pass...
Buy him a couple play masks and then AFTER he has worn them and he likes them make comments about how its likegrandmas mask... :-)
it is a phase, but I would suggest a trip to your library and ask the librarian to suggest a book about being afraid. You can read that over and over again and he'll see the little person in the book overcoming a scary situation. He'll want to, too. I've gotten books about a lot of difficult situations. Librarians are great!
A.; yes kids can be scared of things at that age, they are older and see the world through a childs eyes and although they have been in those situations before, he now remembers it, and sees things differently, most kids are scared of holiday people dressed up, we chose to not do those things and make them a part of their life. the grandma thing can scare him yes, not cause of grandma but maybe the noise and he dont know grandma as a two year old, he is realizing differences and his life is scary , whose isnt, its ok for him to cling to you and others, just be there for him and dont push in a direction he dont want to go unless its a must , like with grandma he might need to visit her more often, or invite her to his house, on his turf, he might get more scared out of his home than in it ? i dont know, be patient and know he is becoming a person, and realizing different things, its ok and perfectly normal, maybe he is sensative to noises? like grandmas machine, take him to an arcade or a place with lots of noises, he might still be scared, or make home a bit noisier, although the easter bunny i dont know he brought different noises too, but either way , be patient and let him see its ok and have a good day, D. s
It will pass. When my son was two, Meijers put their halloween display at the enterance. It scared the daylights out of my son. For 2 years he asked if "scary man" was going to be there.
Hello, My son also wewnt through this phase....from about two until 4. He was afraid of anyone in a full costume from Mickey Mouse to Santa claus. ALl you can really do is support him and don't push him to get close to them (we have absolutely no photos of him with Santa or the Easter Bunny....never went to see them). As far as your mom, you might want to check the library as there was a book my son had that had where different people took off masks to show who was behind them (example: the friendly fire fighter). I think it may have been a sesame stree book. My son is 16 now so it may not even be in print anymore. Just love him and support him and don't make a big deal about it.
Something similar happened with me. What if you try putting beautiful photos of her - and other loved ones, like your mother - around the house to talk about her in an environment where he feels safe (i.e. she's not there). Talk about her when he is in the room but where you're not talking TO him necessarily, say with your mother or siblings, maybe tell funny and loving stories about her so that he can hear them but he doesn't feel pressure to "do" anything at that moment. Talk to her lovingly on the phone when he listens but doesn't have to talk himself yet. You can show him how you love her, even making games of hugging and kissing the photos. If he gets comfortable with the photos then take those with you when you see her next, help him put them together in his mind.
Poor kid's just confused! With the love and care you describe, though, you'll all get through it! Have patience.
I know most people won't like my response, but how about this: instead of doing everything you can to "protect" your son, why don't you do what you can to empower him? The more you try to protect him - the more harm you actually do from a psychological perspective. As you protect, you are subconsciously telling him that there is much to fear and he cannot protect himself - you must do it for him. By telling him the Easter bunny is "all gone", gives him the "idea" that it is not within his control and it could come back...because it is just "gone", and not explained appropriately. A simple explanation as opposed to discussions a two year old can not comprehend would have made more sense. "Tell me what it was that frightened you (if he can explain himself), it was a man/woman dressed up in a suit pretending to be the Easter bunny... when he is done working, he will take the suit off and hang it up... the man/woman in the suit is not a real Easter bunny...
Unless you correct this, the fear will continue to grow and he will not move on emotionally to the next stage of development... in other words he will always be afraid of something that requires you to protect him from...and not because he wants it - but because he is giving you your "purpose"....protection. You are defining your roles as protector and the one who needs protection.
I hope this helps...
My daughter went through the same kind of phase. Before she turned one, I had taken her to Santa/Easter Bunny and her face would light up. Then we went to Disneyworld when she was about 18 months, scheduled a character dinner (I thought that since she did great with Santa, she'd love Mickey), and when Goofy came around, she FLIPPED. Honestly, I thought she was going to have a little heart attack :( She couldn't even eat her dinner when the characters weren't around because she was too nervous and kept looking over her shoulder to see if someone was coming. After that, any kind of "character" would freak her out for a while. And this also extended to people in wheelchairs or on things like oxygen. I think it's just fear of the unknown. Like you, I was at a total loss. I was fine if she didn't want to see Mickey Mouse or the Easter Bunny or Santa. But I didn't want her scared of people in wheel chairs, etc... So I just started talking to her and explaining things. I explained why people sometimes need wheelchairs or oxygen, etc, and that they're still just like she and I on the inside. It took a while but she's starting to come around (she'll be 3 in late July). I think you need to just keep talking with him - be consistent. I can imagine it breaks your heart that this is affecting your grandmother but I suggest to just keep talking about it with him. Maybe tell him some really fond stories/memories you have of fun things you've done with your grandmother to help him see that this oxygen thing doesn't change the fact that she's a wonderful person and loves him very much... Best of luck!
does he love fire trucks like most boys at this age? Mine sure does. Take him to the fire dpt. for a fun trip and have them show him their masks and helmets and such. they will let him sit in the truck and everything. just call and make an apt. when there will be another kids group there for you to join. but this will pass, just like everything does in time. GOOD LUCK!
this is a normal phase. It will pass. My son is afraid of lawn mowers...(he will be 2 in june) he is afraid of baths so bathtime is a disaster.
when they are tiny babies they dont know anything and are not afraid of anything. as they start to grow and learn they have stages when they are afraid...
You realy cant reason with him. he doesnt understand. My daugter was terrified of the easter bunny at 2 years and 4 months.. but loved the easter bunny this year at 3 years and 4 months...
We didnt even try to go see santa when she was just 2... We barely got a santa picture when she was 1. But at 3 she was excited to go see santa...
So wait a year..your son will be more reasonable and less fearful.
Sorry but you cant really rush child development..
I remember this with my daughter. We didn't see her consistently,so she didn't remember her. I made photo albums of the family groups. I'd tell stories about the Great Grandma and other family members as we looked at the albums. Finely when my daughter was 3 she jumped into GG's lap and posed for a picture with her tong out.
So my suggestion is to talk your loved ones up, build the family connection for him. Tell him why you love her so. And enplane she needs help breathing. Tell stories about her as a child, that's what my daughter asks for.
Good luck, A. H
