The Genius of Down Syndrome
Before sitting to write this post, I kneeled down next to my two little daughters and prayed. As I kneeled, they automatically flung their arms around my neck and kissed my cheeks. I prayed that somehow, God could give me some words to communicate the miracle of my daughters to you, to anyone who would take the time to read. I have the fear though, that my writing will come across as a proud mother or a compassionate soul. I worry that you just won’t get it. That you won’t hear the truth, that you are blind. Because I was blind until they taught me. And they continue to teach everyone they meet and especially those who take the time to see.
On the way home from a doctor’s visit, my twelve-year-old son suddenly looked at me and said, “Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all get a chromosome injection? So many of the problems we have just wouldn’t exist.” My son who scores extremely high on all standardized tests, who is in honors language arts and math, who is a talented singer, speaker and writer, and has had almost everything in his life come easily.., admires his five-year old sisters with Down Syndrome. He wishes there was a way he could be more like them, he wishes he could have what they have. He wishes he could have their gift of love.
“Yes,” I said without thinking, “Yes, it would be wonderful. What a beautiful, wonderful world that would be.” I thought to myself what a profound thought; to understand that my daughters’ ability to love is a valuable skill, something we work hard to learn, those of us without this gift. To think, if we could have our strengths of learning without our weaknesses of character! Yes! I would take a chromosome injection if that is what it meant.
I finally understood! Down Syndrome is for many, a type of genius. For some reason, many people who have Down Syndrome have a very similar strength; they tend to have an uncanny ability for love and happiness even in extreme adversity and trial. Yes, they struggle. They struggle with things that most of us take for granted. People with Down Syndrome have varying degrees of learning and physical disabilities. They are no saints either. They pout, disobey, throw fits, and manipulate right along with all of us. But one area overall seems to come easily; the matter of choosing love.
The overwhelming majority of us believe that the diagnosis of Down Syndrome is a tragedy, a pitiful circumstance. I have heard it said that people with Down Syndrome are blissfully unaware of their struggle and unaware of pain or heartache. This is untrue! My daughters get sad, they feel frustrated, they get angry, they have opinions, they have personalities of their own, they have a sense of humor, an individual taste in music and art, they enjoy learning, they feel compassion and empathy for others and more. People with Down Syndrome are no tragedy, they are triumphant! They make the choice of love and happiness and they make it so easily that the rest of us might be fooled into believing that it isn’t a choice for them at all. Ah, but it is. It is always a choice.
People with Down Syndrome work hard to learn almost every daily task. They focus and concentrate and apply themselves to learn, to think, to act. The first five years of my daughters’ lives were spent in institutional settings. They both spoke a different language and were never exposed to English. Within five months of living in the U.S., they have more than a basic understanding of the English language. They are able to understand most things we say, follow multiple step directions, express themselves and their needs, speak a few sentences, sign a few words, sing new songs, and so much more. It is amazing what they have learned with great effort. But choosing love comes easily for my daughters, perhaps it is all that comes easily for them, but what is more important than love?
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13
Perhaps so many of us are quick to pity people with Down Syndrome because we have a disability of our own. True genius is often unrecognized because those who truly possess brilliance can not be appreciated by those with no category to understand.
Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see.—Arthur Schopenhauer
So while my daughters might not score well on standardized tests, and while they need therapies and extra help to learn and speak and perform tasks which come automatically for so many of us, they can love better than anyone I have ever met. There is no bumper sticker for the proud parent of a loving, compassionate, joyful, heartwarming, individual but there should be. It is a much more exclusive club and I pity those of us who don’t belong.
Erin began her career as a 5th grade teacher, then became a stay-at-home mom and homeschooler for 6 years. Currently, she writes on her blog, Excuse Our Mess while staying home with her children. Erin and her husband recently adopted two five-year old girls with Down Syndrome from China. She has a passion to raise Down syndrome awareness and advocate for her daughters and other families as well as raise awareness and advocate for the orphan crisis in China. You can follow her on Facebook and Twitter.
