My Resume-Then and Now

I distinctly remember the moment it hit me many years ago. The moment that awakened me to the fact that my super-businesswoman-persona was fading away and being replaced by a new version of me; a version with mac-n-cheese on her shirt and a 24/7 yoga pants habit.

Back in the day, I was “that girl.” The Melanie Griffith-in-Working -Girl-type of ambitious chick that was bursting with goals and dreams. Though I wasn’t from Jersey and didn’t have big 80’s hair, I loved this movie. I think it was because I felt connected to Griffith’s character, Tess, who fought her way to the top armed with only a boatload of drive and gutsy girl chutzpah.

Like me, Tess clawed her way to the top with no college degree. Like me, Tess dealt with mean bosses, a controlling boyfriend and naysayers up the wahzoonie. Although I was from a small town that didn’t have tons of options for a college-less-but-savvy womanpreneur, I dug my heels in, worked hard and rose in the ranks of the company I was employed with. I was a respected, credible and I kicked bootie and took names daily. I was a case study in going after, and achieving, what I wanted career-wise and my resume reflected just that.

Then, six years later my biggest dream came true and it had nothing to do with boardrooms and sales goals. I became a mom to a beautiful, albeit demanding, little boy. Overnight my white collar world went topsy-turvy and my learning curve as a mid-thirties newbie mom was huge. But no one died and I discovered that it is indeed true that parents do not die from lack of sleep. I was happily up to my eyeballs in spitty rags, diapers and colic, but even then my sleep-deprived brain felt the shift in my identity. The hyper-driven-business-y version of me was slipping away one bleary-eyed day at a time.

I think it was the day that I found myself sitting patiently with my now two year- old son, in my yoga pants and pasta- adorned shirt, as his plastic dinosaur feverishly pecked at the side of my head. It was not my choice to play a rousing game of Rexy Eat the Mommy, but as any parents of a toddler knows; sometimes you just roll with it and pray it doesn’t last long. But it was in that moment of peck, peck, roar! peck, peck, roar! that I realized that my little gift from God did not give one rip that I had lead teams, formed marketing plans and beat sales quotas handily. In that moment, I am simply pretend lunch for his toy dino, and I was MOMMY. Period.

In that moment I also realized how drastically different my resume was going to look now that I was immersed in the hardest (and most important) role of my life; being a mom.

My Resume THEN, and NOW

Then: Manager of the Sale Department in charge of achieving sales goals and motivating team members (so we could line the boss’ pockets with the green stuff and fund his European Travel Addiction).
Now: Head of Maintenance in the Toilet Unclogging Department and Primary Cheerleader for things like “cleaning your plate” and mastering the alphabet song.

Then: In charge of ordering and distributing company logo-wear and uniforms.
Now: Chief Clothes Sniffer and Laundry Tech (since my boy child cannot seem to find the hamper and I find myself “test sniffing” to determine if something is “worn,” or “unworn”).

Then: Proficient in problem solving and crisis management.
Now: Veteran lost hat and mittens finder who can ferret out those lost pesky items using only my Spidey-senses and mom version of crisis management skills (“If you don’t find your hat, you’ll freeze your ears off”).

Then: Ergonomics Expert: I could state OSHA’s rules and guidelines for workplaces safety verbatim and sell products that would, “transform work areas to be user friendly areas by using tools and equipment to cut back strain and/or repetitive motions and teaching staff correct work strategies, correct posture and safe lifting techniques.”
Now: Professional Shoelace Knot Picker Outer with a side expertise in Blanket Fixing and Pillow Fluffing. Not just anyone can conquer a spider web of snarled cotton laces or prepare a bed that is kinda-sorta made and an inviting place for tired little bodies to land.

Then: Customer Happiness Expert: I could turn a grumpy/complainer customer into my BFF with a few “I would be happy to fix that for you” and a bunch of well placed, “I am so sorry’s” in under a minute.
Now: Fixer of broken hearts and hurt feelings that can only be mended with chocolate ice cream, previously mentioned rousing games of Rexy Eat the Mommy and boo-boo kissing (because mom saliva is magical, don’t ya know). Also Master of Re-direction, Pretend Peeled Banana Fixer and Head of the Bedtime Storytelling Division.

Parenting is without a doubt some of the hardest work we will ever do. And FYI; your PhD in Child Phycology will be of little use to you when your tot decides that the flower pot in the garden section of Target is his new toilet (they are such fast little buggers!). Accolades, degrees and sales quotas are lovely, but motherhood is by far the most rewarding work we will ever do. I think I like my new resume, my Mom Resume, far better than my old one.

Rebecca is a freelance writer and blogger living in Northern Minnesota. She is the dedicated mom to two beautiful kids, a veteran blogger at FranticMommy and someone who loves to laugh about the trials and tribulations of parenthood. If another mom reads her corny stories and thinks, “Thank gawd it’s not just me!”….mission accomplished. You can also follow Rebecca on Pinterest