Must Have’s for Toddler Totin’ Mamas

I love this poem that, at one time, was thought to be written by Maya Angelou. Sorry to report that our beloved Maya did not write this amazing piece almost twenty years ago; Pamela Redmond Satran did.

But regardless of who did, or didn’t, I love the premise of it. Women need to be independent and prepared for whatever life throws at them.

Moms especially.

Who knew that, after birthing a Small Human out of our Nether Region, for the next 3-5 years we would have to commit to carrying 50% of our house’s content in a tote bag the size of swim mattress whenever the need to leave home arose?

But joking aside, moms truly need to be prepared for everything and anything once they leave the safety and sanity of their humble adobe. As moms we all know that trying to locate the last remaining bottle of teething gel or even a safety pin can feel a little Raiders of the Lost Ark-ish at times. That struggle goes up 10X once we leave home and are at the mercy of wrangling Little People through dangerous and treacherous places like…the Mall.

To avoid too much pants wetting and tantrum pitching (for the kids too), try to “armor up” with this short list of Must Have’s for Toddler Totin’ Mamas …

The Three C’s

In my opinion, the three things that are most crucial to navigating an excursion with little kids without losing your everlovinmind are the “three C’s.” The three “C’s” are: Courage, Confidence and CASH. I don’t mean a handful of hundos, but pocket money, or what my mom used to call “Walking around money.” Small bills are best and, whatever you do; don’t forget to keep at least four quarters in your purse. You never know when a twenty-five cent vending machine bouncy ball or slightly vampy fairy tattoo can make the difference between a happy kid and one who is wailing like a tornado siren.

Hand Sanitizer

The world is a gooey, gloppy, germy place and, even if hand sanitizer doesn’t work (according to childless experts), at least it will help you feel like you are doing your part to keep dreaded germs from attacking your little darlings. Oh, I would suggest stocking up on hand/face wipes too. Nothing is more terrifying than a sticky sucker in the hands of a toddler who has free range of the universe.

Snacks

Adults are not the only ones who experience having moments of being hangry (angry hungry) and if your kids are like mine, they seem to be hungry CONSTANTLY. To avoid having Paul Blart: Mall Cop moments of catching your child licking abandoned candy off the sidewalk, keep a stash of finger foods like crackers, pretzels, raisins or Goldfish crackers handy at all times.

Distraction Materials

These “materials” are also commonly known as BOOKS and TOYS, but let’s face reality here. These items are necessary and great, but your child will be likely be more entertained with an age-appropriate iPhone app or tablet that plays the Disney channel. I am totally an advocate of screen-free time, but I also think moms prefer to be able to survive a waiting room experience with a toddler with minimal collateral damage. Your best bet is to be prepared and take several forms of entertainment with you on your family journeys.

An Extra Change of Clothes

I am here to tell you that blow-outs and Mudslides South of the Border happen at the most inopportune times. I will never forget the time a toddler at the park had one such incident and her unprepared parents let her run free in her soiled pants. Basically, she left a “mark” on everything her butt touched (use your imagination—it was gruesome). Needless to say, an extra change of clothes would have salvaged everyone’s fun at the park that day. I know you may be tempted to skimp and only pack pants, but don’t. All it takes is one episode with CRAPAGEDEON (the type of bodily explosion that shoots poo up your child’s back and down his/her legs) to understand the importance of taking along a FULL change of clothes. This is the voice of experience talking here!

Patience

Parenting is hard work and kids are crafty little buggers who can make our hearts fill with love and our head sprout gray hairs in roughly 20-second intervals. Family outings can most definitely be patience-testers, but the Season of Parenthood goes by sooooo fast. Focus on the positive, drink in every precious moment and don’t be afraid to go on adventures whenever possible. Remember the day at the beach not as being The Day My Daughter Cried Eight Times, but instead remember the sight of the sand betwixt tiny toes and the look of wonder when your kids discovered new critters. Embrace the messy moments along with the good.



Rebecca Flansburg is a Mom, Blogger, and Freelance Writer. Her veteran blog FranticMommy is all about moms, kids, parenting, and women in business (with a healthy side order of FUNNY). Rebecca prides herself in her ability to write in a fun, fresh, and conversational way and totally appreciates the value of naps and large quantities of chocolate. You can connect with her on Instagram and on Pinterest.