5 Things I'd Tell My High School Graduating Self

Recently, I hit a milestone. A big one.

Twenty years ago this year, I stood with 364 of my classmates on my high school’s football field and got my diploma. As I sat in that crowd on that field, under a setting sun, my white cap affixed upon my Jersey Girl Aqua Net-styled hair, we ruminated over the highs and lows of our four years in the hallowed halls of our high school. We looked forward to our futures, and swore we’d “stay the same!” and “never change!” Our futures were bright and we were excited. And our hair was huge. HUGE, I tell you.

Since then, I’ve thought a lot about what I would say to that naive, big-haired girl. Because there are bits of wisdom that the high school me could have reeeaally benefitted from, had I known sooner, rather than later.

5 Things I Would Tell My High School Graduating Self

• 1. Travel Now, While Your Standards Are Still Low

One of my biggest regrets is that I did not travel overseas more when I was fresh out of high school. With the demands of college and the financial restraints, it always seemed more sensible to work All. The. Summers. I spent my summers chained to a desk doing secretarial work when I should have been backpacking throughout Europe and staying in hostels. There’s a reason they are called YOUTH hostels: they are not necessarily the hotel of choice for grown ups with more exacting tastes. A trip to Europe with the standards you have now, costs about the same as a year of college. Travel now while you don’t mind sleeping with a bunch of other smelly travelers, and while flying coach seems like a treat. Even if you have to pack up your tiny piece of shit, barely running car and make your passengers pay for gas, get in that POS and see the world as cheaply as you can.

• 2. You Will Be Friends With Everyone Eventually… on Facebook

Let’s face it, high school can be a rough time socially. While I was never a social outcast, I wasn’t exactly Miss Popularity, either. I had my core group of friends and I remember my high school years, fondly. But I also remember feeling out of place and not cool enough. Although, come to think of it, that might have to do with the fact that when I was allowed to drive to school, I did so in a Celebrity station wagon (that, and I spent the majority of my fall afternoons spinning a flag in white spandex bedazzled with orange sequins…the height of cool, no?).

I watched The Cool Kids from the sidelines and I’m not gonna lie… I had my feelings hurt a time or two. But, a magical thing happens about 10 years after graduation… you get over the hierarchy of high school and throw the social rules out the window. You find yourself “thumbs upping” that Cool Kid’s post about being a new mommy and you will be thrilled for her. And, by 20 years out, you will invite anyone from your senior class to your house if they promise to bring wine and tell you how young you look.

• 3. Your First Love Helps You Find Your Lasting Love

We all have one – our High School First Love. The first person you dated seriously and to whom you said, “I love you," and meant it. The person you spent every waking weekend minute with at football games, friends’ houses and local restaurants. The person who, at the tender age of 17, you were convinced you couldn’t live without and whom you locked lips with before 6th period English at your special meeting spot near the gym. The person who would either be forever known as your “High School Sweetheart” after you’d married, and/or the person who’d eventually break your love-struck, high school heart.

Turns out for me, my First Love served a second purpose beyond teaching me about heartache… he helped me recognize my true Lasting Love. My High School Sweetheart and I broke up a few years into college, and while it was sad and hurtful, we both knew it was the right decision. I loved him and he loved me but eventually, we both found partners who loved us better and who loved us the way we needed and deserved. And, now, 20 years later, we laugh about it on Facebook as we thumbs up the pictures of each other’s kids. First Loves are great… but true Lasting Love is better.

• 4. Styles Change… For The Better.

As a graduate hailing from the AquaNet era, I and my fellow classmates fell victim to many a fashion misstep. Aside from the aforementioned white spandex and sequins, our high school class straddled the age of 80s style and the advent of Grunge. We had big hair, parachute pants, shoulder pads, as well as baby doll dresses, construction boots and flannel. Stirrup pants were a necessary part of any wardrobe, and we all ran around in sweaters that would comfortably fit Refrigerator Perry.

When I look back on my photos, I have no idea what we were thinking. I would like my high school-self to know that construction boots are not a part of my modern day wardrobe, and that today, I would never be caught dead in anything made from Cavaricci. And if I had it to do over, my prom dress would NOT have been covered in teal sequins and white taffeta (what was it with me and odd colored sequins??). I maintain, though, that Liz Claiborne made the coolest purses ever. And fist pump to being united in all the colors of Benetton.

• 5. High School Is NOT The Best Part Of Your Life

As anyone who watched Beverly Hills 90210, Dawson’s Creek or Saved By The Bell will tell you, people want you to believe that High School is the pinnacle of fun you will ever have in your life. Today’s me, calls bullshit on that thankyouverymuch.

Quite the contrary, in fact.

College is way more interesting and the word “fun” doesn’t even begin to describe what life is like when you get your first job and you have money to burn. Life after college, while terrifying at times, is exciting! When you can selfishly chase the dreams you couldn’t afford in high school and college, life takes a turn for the better. And when you move on to married life and children… a different kind of fun altogether. Nonetheless, life gets sweeter and sweeter as the years go by. High school is amazing and the memories are fond, but it is by no means the end. It’s only the beginning, thank goodness…

So when it came time to RSVP to the 20 year reunion in my small town, I decided not to go, opting, instead, to pour over the pictures and comments on (you guessed it) Facebook.

I remember the teachers, the friends and the memories fondly. I smiled at the antics on fall afternoons, driving cars and chasing boys. I reminisced about proms, chemistry classes from hell, and school musicals that rivaled Broadway productions. Mostly though, I remembered myself wearing teal sequins and white taffeta hoping that the best was yet to come… and that has already come true.

I am the Keeper of The Fruit Loops, Driver of The People Mover and Manager of the Fecal Roster. In other words, I’m a mom. I’m an Erma Bombeck/ Martha Stewart combo with a Roseanne Barr twist, and I have the mouth and organized cabinets to prove it. I live in Pennsylvania with my ever budget-conscious husband, two blog inspiring Fruit Loops and my extensive collection of thrift shop finds. When I’m not writing, I’m busy running marathons, governing the PTA like nobody’s business and pinning on Pinterest like it’s my job. You can follow me on my blog, Keeper of the Fruit Loops, Facebook and Twitter.