5 Questions to Ask a Prospective Nanny

We spoke with licensed clinical social worker Aisha D. Pope LCSW, co-founder of Roots and Wings Consulting in La Mesa, California about tips on finding a competent, caring nanny. Mrs. Pope has two children of her own, including a son with special needs. Both had nannies up to the time of preschool and are bright, thriving children. Ask the following questions of all your to-be-nannies, but know it’s just as important to analyze their questions of you. Are they mostly logistical or do they reveal a genuine interest in learning what’s needed to nanny your child successfully? Your findings will aid in making an informed hiring decision.


#1: What are your views on discipline?

Some parents take an “I’m your friend,” hands-off approach, some are old-school strict and still others fall somewhere in the middle. Pope says, “It’s crucial that a nanny understands how you expect discipline to be handled in your home. Find someone whose philosophy/values about discipline are compatible with yours.”


#2: Please explain to me why you think kids do what they do.

Take the terrible twos. We’ve all been there. Look out for the nanny who shrugs her shoulders and says “It’s just stage…” A two-year old throws tantrums, bites, acts out and challenges parents because he or she cannot fully communicate or manage strong emotions yet. If a candidate can explain a true understanding about kids and why they act as they do-whether they’re two or 10, that’s golden.


#3: What kind of family is a good fit for you?

Some families need a live-in nanny, others are fine with a lighter schedule. Pope explains, “A nanny is not a babysitter who comes in for a few hours while you go on a weekly date night. She is probably the closest non-relative to be so intimately involved with your family and you’re trusting her with your childrens’ lives.” A nanny must understand her role as a member of the family, one that is crucial to the safety and development of the children in her charge.


#4: Do you have experience with special-needs children?


Even if your own children do not have special needs, this question provides insight into the nanny’s experience and her ability to handle more challenging or uncommon situations that could pop up at any time.


#5: Here’s my child’s meal, sleep and school schedule. How you would schedule activities in their free time and why?

Pope adds, “Of course kids need time to chill and do whatever they want. That should be a regular part of their schedules, but most importantly, they need structure.” This exercise can reveal how creative the nanny is and if she can think on her feet. One that answers with “Here’s a schedule for homework, watching TV, playing outside and free time,” among others, shows a person who understands healthy mental, physical and emotional activity options for your kids. Opt for this over a candidate that takes the schedule without offering any additional input.



Shelley Moench-Kelly is a New England-based writer and editor whose freelance clients include Google, L’Oreal Paris and TheWeek.com. You can follow her on Facebook