Wwyd? - University Place,WA

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My daughter missed the bus her first day....i had no car or friend that day at that moment....so i called a cab......it was 7 dollars.

I would call a friend. I'm a contingency person, but I think I need to feel in control all the time. I have back ups for my back ups: )

Would the nurse or someone else at the school drive her home? I mean it's only 1 mile - where's the village to help raise the kids.........My kids principal herself would do if my kid needed it. They have so many people at the school, a gym teacher who has this period off etc, someone should be able to run her home for you. It would take them less than 5 min!!!

This is just my opinion but it doesn't sound like she's very sick. I mean a fever of 99 isn't anything to panic about and her stomach hurts but she hasn't vomited. I would just let her ride the bus home and get ready to put her to bed. She can lay down in the nurses room until end of school. I know you feel bad but really, there isn't too much you can do. Just take good care of her when she gets home. Good luck.

Can you take a cab to her school and pick her up after your son gets home?

I'm sure your daughter knows you are doing all you can!!!!!!!

Now is a good time to get a backup plan in place - neighbor who could step in and wait for your son while you go get your daughter. Or even a babysitter that you could hire every once in a while as needed for stuff like this!

I would let the principal know that the nurse was being inappropriate for giving you a hard time. Your daughter doesn't really have a fever - her temp is up a little. Unless she's throwing up, I think laying down in the nurses office and coming home on the bus would be fine. If you can get a taxi, or perhaps your area's public transportation has an on-call shuttle, you can go get her.

Oh poor thing, both of you :( I know everyone's home now, but this is what emergency contacts are for. Get a neighbor or close friend/relative to add to your contacts, so next time this happens, you have a plan B! Hope your little one is feeling better :)

And don't let the nurse get to you. We had this one AWFUL school nurse who actually used to live across the street from us. My daughter bumped her head on the playground one day, and went to the nurse to get ice. The nurse called me and told me what happened... I was like 'do I have to pick her up?'... she said no... but then didn't hang up. I was like 'okay, so really, do I have to pick her up?'... she said 'why don't you speak with your daughter?'... well, Emmy wanted to go back to class, so when the nurse came back on, I told her... and she still wouldn't hang up. I was like FINE, I'll pick her up, whatever... there was NOTHING wrong with her, she had a bruise, big deal... what a waste of a school day!!

It's okay, mama. Your daughter has a slightly high temperature and a tummy ache, but she'll be just fine until she gets home. She can stay with the nurse until it's time to get on the bus. If it were more serious, I'd say try to make arrangements with a friend to pick her up or something, but in this case, I think she can make it. I would start thinking about what to do if it happens again and it IS worse, though.

Again--all you can do is really all you can do. I don't think making her walk a mile home is the way to go.

Is there a neighbor who could watch your son after he gets home & let you borrow their car or give you all the short ride to the school?

Could your husband possibly get there before school ends? Keep trying to get hold of your husband.

Otherwise, she can lie quietly in the nurse's office until dismissal and take the bus.

Well. Will you get there before school lets out? I walk a little under a mile everyday to get my son (for the exercise), it takes a little time. Or will walking just make you arrive when school lets out? And do you have a wagon or sit and stand stroller you can use? If your daughter has a tummy ache, I can't imagine a mile walk making her feel any better. If the answer is yes to both questions, I'd call the nurse and tell her you are on your way...that it may take a bit because you are walking. If the answer is no, then I would just leave her at school. I understand the nurse's concerns and her position, but there is only so much we can control. Sometimes inconvenient things happen. Surely the nurse can understand that. And your daughter will understand too.

Your daughter may not feel well but will probably be okay to stay the rest of the day. I think it's better to let her stay and ride the bus home rather than walk home for a mile just to get her out a little earlier.
I'm surprised you and the school don't have a few emergency contact people on file for these types of things. After all, stuff happens! I never had family nearby either so I just used a few of my kids' friends' moms (and they had me as their emergency person as well.) You may want to set this up with a few moms so you have a back up going forward.

I too am sorry the nurse wasn't more understanding.... :-(

I just wanted to say how lucky Amanda G is that a cab ride only cost $7!!! Here they are ridiculous! 7$ would probably only get you a block or 2! I wish cabs were that reasonable here! I've taken a cab home before when I've had a few too many drinks (cheaper and more moral than a DUI) and it was well over $20 just to go 2 miles!

The school nurse should not be giving you hell, and I'd be complaining to the principal about that. You are in a situation where you are not able to get her. Period. They have cots and cool washcloths that they could let her use until you can either get there to pick her up or until she can ride the bus home. She doesn't have to go back to class.

My only suggestion is that you make friends with a neighbor or parents of kids in your daughter's class, so that if this ever arises again, you have a backup person who would be willing to take you to get her. So sorry!

I'd walk the mile, and also I'd maybe call your son's school to see if there was a drop-off closer to your daughters school so you could get a head start on walking there. it is obviously too late now (the school day is over). But, that is what I would do, cause a mile really isn't that big of a deal... it could easily be walked/jogged in less than 10 min.

I'd contemplate this for the future since this is a scenario that could happen again. We are sharing a car right now, too- I know how it is, but you gotta have a game plan for these "emergencies"/situations.

I am a bit shocked the nurse gave you hell for that. Her fever is very low and she is not vomiting. You have no car right now- this is life. She will be ok lying in the nurses office till it's time to take the bus home.

Your hands are tied. If she is feeling sick, walking a mile home may not be a good option for her either. She doesn't sound so severe that staying in the nurses office and riding the bus home for an hour is going to be horrible. How much longer is her school day? If she were desperately ill or a high fever, I would talk to neighbors, call up church friends...

That nurse should not have gave you grief! Hope you get your daughter and she feels better soon.

You are not a horrible mom, you sound like you are doing all you can. Call a friend to help you pick her up. Remember no one can help unless you ask.
Have a great afternoon.

Do you attend a church, is there anyone in your congregation you can call to help you? I guess if you had to walk, you have no choice, maybe you could give her a piggy back all the way home?? That's definitely a hard one, sorry:(

So if the school can't bring her home, I'd not worry about it.

If it was earlier in the day, you could walk to school to get her if you don't trust her to walk home. I don't know your neighborhood, but I walked 1.2 to 1.4 miles to and from school every school day for several years. Not a big deal to walk home.

Good luck to you and yours.

Hi,
By now your daughter is home and resting. I hope she and you are feeling much better. I'm sorry the nurse was difficult with you. One never knows what is else going on in the nurse's office (other children vomiting, contagious disease, etc.) that makes the nurse want to get the slighly ill children out of harm's way. For the future, you really need a plan in case your child is seriously ill, and many folks here have made good suggestions. If you think the nurse was really rude, please speak to her directly. A good relationship with the school nurse can be a very reassuring thing to have.

I think you should have a plan for the future and if you have to walk a mile each way so be it, that is not that far. As for the temp of 99, what is her normal not sick temp? My son's normal is 97.4 so 99 is like 100 to most other people. How they are acting is more important then the number on the thermometer.

i think making heer walk a mile sick would be worse than letting the nurse let her lay there until ur husband gets to her

There has been times that I had to stay longer than that sitting in the nurses office until school got out because I had no way home.

The nurse shouldn't have treated you that way. Actually at our school, if they don't have a temp and just a belly ache they have them sit in the office for the rest of the period and then see if they can go back before calling the parents to come and get them. Next time since its only a mile away can the nurse drive her home? Our nurse has done that for us... walked them home when in town if one of the younger ones were sleeping and I couldn't leave or with the kids in school a town over when I don't have a car ( we only have 1 also) she has brought them home.

I hope she feels better and in the future if the nurse acts this way politely put her in her place.

Since she doesn't sound critical with only a 99 degree fever I would not do anything because walking there would mean she would have to walk home sick too. I would take your husband to work in the future in case of emergencies down the road. Then pick him up later. I did that for years if I needed the car and otherwise was stuck at home like you are with no car. It worked for me but that was years ago and more people home in the day not working and family close, etc. I don't know why the school would be so upset when they can let her rest there and she's not throwing up or running a raging temperature. Don't worry about it.

Hi M.,
I'm sorry! If it makes you feel any better about all of this, our pediatrician insists that anything under 100 degrees in children is not a fever. Although I totally understand her not feeling well. I'd keep trying to get a hold of your husband and if worse comes to worse she'll ride that bus home and you can take care of her then. But yes, this is a good time to rethink backup plans for the future. Good luck and keep us posted!

This is one of the many reasons I never wanted my kids in school. For a good many years I had no way I would have been able to get my kids. When I was licensed and had 10 kids, I would not have been able to get up and run. My husband has never been willing or answered the phone. I may as well have been single. My mother wasn't available either. I am so sorry that the school treats you that way.

When I did finally put my kids in school, my mother moved in with me that same year. BUT, she was working the first year and she would have to leave work. It only happened once when I wanted to bring them home on 9/11 and once when one of them got hurt in school and needed a cat scan.

You are doing the best you can and I am sorry you got grief for that from the nurse. Technically she only has an elevated temp and at our schools, you are asked to pick up your child if he temp is over 100.

Do you know any of your neighbors? Daughter's friends' moms? Do you know anyone? I am trying to wrap my head around how you don't know anyone when you have 2 children in school...

Around here, we work together and if a mom is sick or child is sick, we pitch in to help out if needed such as keeping a child for a while, etc.

Do you have a large wagon or something? I would probably walk to the school to get her, but, I would also be prepared that she may not feel like walking home. SO, I would use the wagon and just make an adventure out of it.

This is a cue that you need to be meeting some people and get a network going for you. No one knows that you might need help uless you ask, that is what friends are for.

We live a plane ticket away from all family but I have such a good network of friends, contacts, etc... I would not consider moving away from here.

I do home childcare, and have my daughters entire school career (she is a senior this year). So while I am always available for the phone calls, my husband is not always available for a sick pick up for about an hour or more (he installs auto glass so orbits the Twin Cities and if hes in the middle of an install, he has to finish of course). Luckily, my daughter never got sick much, but it did happen with similar circumstances as you describe.

If mine had less than about 100 or even a tich more...wasn't hysterical or barfing, and was close to the end of the day that way, I would ask them to let her sit class out, lay in the dark with a cool cloth, then have them get her worksheets, etc together for her and send her home on the bus. By the time my hubby could even possibly get there, it was bus time anyway. Not ideal, but realistic.

If it was earlier, my back up plan was to contact any and all relatives close by (3 grandparents and some aunts and uncles when she was that young) to see if anyone was working at home, or could skip out for an hour...grandparents helped in those pinches for me as I couldn't leave 4-8 other daycare kids.

Good luck.

How will she get home I assume around 3:00? Resting in the nurse's office shouldn't be that big a deal for the school. But if she's going to take a bus home, that might not be the best idea so if you can't find a friend to help, do you have a stroller you could push your son to school in and then put her in to get her home? He'll have to walk... Or how about a taxi?

I wouldn't walk up to get her and have her walk back home. It happens...she can rest on the cot in the nurse's office.

This might be a good example to give your husband for why YOU need the car, and not him. Is there another way he can get to work? Can you drop him off and pick him up?

Do you have any neighbors or friends, or other Moms, that can help you and drive you?

Then, did you leave a voice-mail message for your Husband about it? Meaning, sometimes a Husband will not call back right away... unless they know it is an emergency. Especially if they are busy at work.
Or, call the main office line of your Husband's office, and say you need to get a hold of him. That your child is sick etc. and is being sent home from school.

And yes, if you have to walk, you have to walk.
Or, can you get your son earlier from school? Just pick him up already, if you can. Then head on over to your daughter's school.
Let the school Nurse know what is going on.

Per future needs of your vehicle:
Me and Hubby have only 1 vehicle as well. I am a SAHM and have 2 kids in school. My Hubby, car pools to work and catches the bus home. So that... I can have our vehicle. If he took it to work (he does not need a car for the job he has), then it would just be sitting in a parking lot all day being useless and he having to pay for parking. Thus, since I am the one home with our kids.... I have the vehicle to use. It is more useful and necessary, being I am the one with the kids during the day and needing it per, what if... emergencies happens? I need a vehicle.

Call a taxi. If the school is only a mile away, it shouldn't cost much. Or you could walk there and use the taxi to get home so your sick daughter doesn't have to walk. Good luck! I know this is extremely stressful for you and who is that nurse anyway

99 is not a fever. I would have waited for your son and walked up. No point in starting an issue with the nurse. If they know you are coming the would be happy enough. Funnier even if it took you longer to get there and they had to stay late (I'm evil like that)

I think the schools overreact and send kids home for now reason but what can you do?

I say let the nurse handle it until you can get ahold of your husband, provided it doesn't take too long. I'm thinking that they don't want to expose the other kids on the bus to whatever she may have.
School nurses are licensed and just as capable as the ones at the Dr.s office. She/He should be more understanding.
Heck, ask her if she wants to drive her home. It's only a mile. You don't have a car at your disposal and I'm sure the principal would okay it. (Sarcasm here)
No, I don't think walking home would do her any good. Yuck. If she felt like walking home she would feel well enough to stay at school.
Sorry

Edited to add: I totally agree Amanda. And at least one of the principals I work for, probably two of them would take the child home. Or even the guidance councilor, or whoever was available, but at the third school you would probably get the same treatment you are getting now.

You are doing all you can...which is the best you can do. It would not sit well with me that the nurse is giving you hell about this. To me, her job as school nurse is to take care of sick kids until their parents can get there. That is her JOB! You are trying to make arrangements as best you can and she's just going to have to deal with that!

I would think your daughter walking a mile home while feeling ill probably isn't the best solution. Do you have any neighbors home who might be willing to give you a ride to the school to get her?

Like others have said a temp of 99 is not a fever. What are you going to do, walk a mile to the school and have your daughter walk a mile back home with you, with a stomach ache? That doesn't make sense. I am sorry the nurse gave you a hard time, she shouldn't have. I hope everything worked out and your daughter feels better.