Would You Be Offended If a Co-worker Offered You Clothing?

Updated on November 14, 2017
N.G. asks from Fayetteville, AR
12 answers

On the job a person asked another person what size her daughter wears. The one person had lost weight and her clothes no longer fit her. The woman is very well-dressed and her clothing appears to be quite expensive.

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So What Happened?

Mamas, I read that some of you say, "no one would object to this". Uhm, no. If that were the case, there'd be no need for this question.

But I agree with your gist. I relish hand me downs, yard sales, helping folk move so that in can get things that can not fit in the moving van. Lol.

However, this was a small issue at our workplace last week between two,women who actually got along. I was thinking darn, I wish I could wear that size.

And no she did not offers in front of others and no she did not bring the items in. The offended party was looking sad in the break room at lunch and it was brought out and yes the offender was there and apologized for the offer.

Featured Answers

W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

there are some people who do NOT like used clothing. Period. End of Story.

HOW did this W. approach the other? Did she say "Hey - I've lost 50 lbs and these clothes don't fit me anymore - do you want them?" that would be a slap in the face.

If the co-worker comes up and says to everyone - I am giving away some clothes that I don't need anymore - please let me know who is interested? Then no one is being called out and no drama happens.

2 moms found this helpful

More Answers

E.A.

answers from Erie on

Your have to be a special kind of a**hole to be sad because someone offered your child clothing. Geez.

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

No not at all. I am never offended when people offer to pass along stuff - I think it's a kind gesture. That's clearly someone who has no use for it anymore as opposed to "Oh you clearly need help" (which is kind of a more delicate situation which should be handled differently. I don't get that vibe from what you've written here.
I once asked someone this though (I was going to pass on my daughter's clothes) and she didn't respond, so I may have offended her. It wasn't my intention and she knew me very well. Or she just didn't get back to me. Either way - I'm not someone who would reach out to offend anyone (even if I didn't care for someone). It was meant as a thoughtful gesture (a lot of my friends would jump at the chance to inherit a ton of clothes - I know I would). She would know that - regardless.
I think it's how you present it.

4 moms found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

No, I would not be offended! I would be delighted!

2 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Not at all! One of my favorite sweaters came from a colleague and I'm glad that before tossing or donating it, she realized that the cut and color that didn't work for her would look great on me.

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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Well, the only reason I could think of for a lady to be upset was if this well dressed lady was older than her daughter. Most professional women wear nice dress clothes to a professional job. So if this woman offered clothing that was too old looking or for an older person and not for a younger girl, then maybe that's why she was upset. Because her girl wouldn't want to wear "Old lady clothes" even if the lady was only in her 20's or 30's. To a kid that seems super old.

1 mom found this helpful
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G.♣.

answers from Springfield on

Why was she offended? Did she think people though she was poor and couldn't afford clothes? Maybe she was afraid people thought she had poor fashion sense? What, exactly, upset her about the offer?

1 mom found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would be thrilled, not be offended. I have run into people who feel they are "too good" to wear hand-me-downs or shop second hand, but most people I know would be happy. These are usually people I couldn't be bothered with, because I can't stand their entitled attitudes.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Nope!
Happens all the time.
People trade shirts/pants and with kids especially everyone appreciates hand me downs!
Why would anyone be offended?
If someone could use the item they say "Thanks!".
If not they say "No thank you but thanks for asking!".

Additional:
Sounds like this other person at work took something personally somehow - like the clothes offer was some sort of comment on how she dresses maybe.
Sounds like it's all over now.

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

Not at all. I have had co-workers give me cloths. They feel line they want someone to get use of them.

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B.A.

answers from Columbus on

One of my co-workers has brought in clothes that her step-son has outgrown several times. I love it, and I'm not at all offended by it. I actually just carried a box of toys and clothes out to my car to give to another co-worker tomorrow who has a son that's younger than mine.

I also wouldn't have a problem accepting clothing that fit me. I don't know if I'd wear it to work because I'm too self-conscious. But I would wear it outside of work!

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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

This has happened to me and I took my coworker up on her offer with many thanks.

I have also offered maternity clothes to a pregnant coworker, which she accepted gratefully.

I don’t understand your offended coworker’s reaction. Was it because the woman was giving them away because she had lost weight and she thought the woman was implying that the daughter was overweight?

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