Ive been asked to travel for work but am afraid that it might be too traumatic for my toddler. I know this age is where the attachment is really important. Her routine would remain the same- ie. daycare, dinner, bedtime routine. What are your motherly instincts. I have some guilt and worry here. She has spent 2-3 night w/out Mommy and seems to have been fine. But a week is very different.
Do you have to go? Who will be looking after her? I don't think that it's wrong at all , if you are leaving her with husband/grand parents then she will be fine , sometimes these things have to be done , and it's not like you are going off for a week to have a holiday without her , it's work.
Hi D.,
I went with my brother, his wife, and their ~3 year old son to Florida many years ago. We stayed at my parents' home. My brother and his wife then went for a vacation to the Keys. I stayed with my nephew so he would have someone he knew with him. He always wanted me in sight, even while I was in the bathroom. When they returned, he clung to me. He was in an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar people except for me. He warmed up to them soon after.
Your daughter will be at home with your spouse, I assume. Her routine will be the same, so I think she will be fine while you are gone and when you return. Call her when you are able so that she can hear from you. Can you Skype while you are away? That would be great.
I think all will be fine.
Have a great trip,
: ) Maureen
It's not right or wrong...
We left our son with grandparents for 5 days when he was 2 years old. It really wasn't a problem.
My guess is your daughter will be fine - the question is, will you be able to focus on your work while you are away from her?
I think you should go on the trip. In the grand scheme of things, she will never remeber you left. When she gets older and she sees that you go away for work explain to her that mommies work and it is important to be a smart, strong woman. Your daughter will be fine with you gone, just make sure to call her daily to tell her how much you love her!
I say go ahead!
Your daughter will be fine. My husband used to travel all the time for work and bring home a special treat.
If her schedule is not changing at all she is going to be just fine... you on the other hand will have the stress and anxiety thinking you are doing her an injustice... but you too will be fine!
I am sure the trip will be just fine. I think that a 3 year old can't really tell the difference between 3 days and a week - both just feel like long times. One week apart will in no way damage your attachment to your daughter. You can still call her on the phone, etc. You can also think of it as a nice way for her to get some serious bonding time with her other parent.
I spent a week away from my daughter about a week before her third birthday AND over Easter. It was MUCH harder on me than her! She honestly didn't seem to mind at all. It was a very happy reunion, but I was the one who was anxious and stressed. I never imagined that I would have missed her so much and I was so surprised that she was excited to tell me about her day on the phone, but ready to move on and do the next thing. There were "I want my mommy moments", but overall - just not a problem.
Just prep your child well if you're going to do this. Let them know what's up andhave some special things planned from you to her over the week. (Mommy made cookies for you in the freezer, mommy has a picture/letter for you/ mommy left a surprise gift for you - stickers!...etc....)
D.,
I have a 4 year old and have been travelling for work since she was one for about 4 days at a time. I do it about 3 to 4 times a year. If you have a great routine in place and a support system (husband, other family) you're little one will be just fine. Yes, she'll miss you and you'll probably miss her even more but you'll both be fine.
The first time may be a little tough. I have to say that although it's a lot of work leaving for a week (all the prepping at home like laundry done and emergency numbers ready) you may enjoy actually being away for a few days, even if it's for work. Enjoy a long relaxing hot shower or soak in the tub! We forget as moms to take time out for ourselves. Whatever you do, don't feel guilty!!
Good luck!
One way to stay in contact, if you go, is to SKYPE your daughter each day. You can introduce the child to skype by skyping a grandparent / friend/ aunt / uncle so she is familiar with it. If you won't have a computer, or there is no computer at home, call her each day- in the morning, just before bed. Read her a story on the phone, and have her have a copy of the book to follow along. Have a goodie bag for her, so she opens one special thing each day you are gone. Be sure she has a picture of you- on the table- on the frig or nite stand.
As to your question- is it wrong to leave your child... that is a decision you need to make. You indicated it is for work. Think too about about your professional opportunities and responsiblities. A business trip is an excellent opportunity for networking, and advancing your skills and knowledge. For me, if I had to make a decision like you need to do, I would weigh all the options, and importance of the trip, reason for the trip, and what it will do for your career. Is there an expectation from the employer that you will attend? Remember in today's society you should be able to stay in contact with your daughter. You have also indicated that her routine will not change if you go.
Good luck as you weigh your options and make your decision.
Hi D. - I travel for my job too... I took a year off from traveling b/c I was breastfeeding. Then, when my son was 13 months I had to go to China for 10 days. I almost died but I was SHOCKED at how well my son did! I had family help out my husband and everything went great. I still go 2x per year to China and everyone survives. Trust me, it will be WAY harder on you than on anyone else!! Good luck!!!!!
