Why Wont These Kids Sleep Alone?!?!

Updated on August 22, 2010
E.M. asks from Louisville, KY
7 answers

I have an almost 7 year old little girl who since age 3 will not stay in her bed at night! Every morning i wake up and there she is....NEXT TO ME STEALING THE COVERS!!! If im awake the first time she does it i take her back to her bed and she will return 1-3 hours later. This has totally ruined my love life with my hubby b/c we never know when a little person will show up at our door. (we have no lock) her little sister 3 is also now waking up in the night to come to our bed. our 6 year old stopped coming in for a while after we got her a bunk bed but now shes comfortable enough to venture down half asleep. as for my 3 year old she was a great sleeper up until about 7 months ago. it used to be that i could lay her down and out she went and thats the only way she would go to sleep now the only way we can get her to sleep is to fall asleep watching tv in the living room then carry her up. Im at my whits end mommas please help!!!!! PS we just switched my daughter to a toddler bed 2 days ago and she fell out this morning. its supposed to be one of the cribs that crib toddler full but i cant figure out how to make it a toddler bed any one know how lol???

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A.U.

answers from Detroit on

Well first off I'd say that you need a lock on the door for your "love life" time... Then unlock it and if they kids feel that need to come to you, whats the big deal? They're only little for a short time, one day you'll miss it :)
It makes them feel secure......don't sweat the small stuff...enjoy the cuddle time with them
:)

4 moms found this helpful
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D.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello E., I am sure that I am repeating what others have said but GET A LOCK, heavens it takes only minuets to install and its dirt cheap. But I have to tell you that we traded rooms around and forgot that this one didn't have one and -- low and behold in comes one of the children ...
I can give you the answer in a nut shell--- they want the comfort, security and love being with mom and dad brings.
As for the oter problem about the children. We have 5, and they were all likely to sleep with us at any given time, now I have grandchildren that are the same they want to be with me. This was a simple solution to our problem. I kept a stack of quilts , blankets and even a few slumber bags in a cornor of my bedroom-- when a child came in they would curl up like Big Bird in a nest and go to sleep. The thing you have to be careful about is not stepping on someone if you get up!
I want to say that you can put the children all in a room together and that helps as well as they will snuggle up to one another-- I came home one day after we were doing some things to our home and furniture was our of the rooms-- my children had moved their beds into the main bedroom and were all togeter and that ended the problem for some time. We used the next smaller room and dthe 3rd bedroom became the play room. I ended the TV problem in a simple way. 1 hour before bedtime I turn it off and then put on music. They can have the music on for hours as long as its soothing. We as adults could wait until they were down to watch it. We learned it was just a way for the little one to be with daddy that much longer so he started reading to them-- They didn't seem to care if it was Tom Swayer, Westerns, Scriptures or his school books as long as they heard his voice.
As for the toddler bed--- go on line / youtube and look up the company and they will have step by step instructions on what to do.
I know that parenthood is a great adventure, at least with my 5 it is and now with grandchildren. I think of it as a theme park ride lots of twists and turns a thrill around every cornor and fear and excitement along the way but at the end of the ride is joy, happiness and the knowledge that you enjoyed it. I promise you MOM that you will make it throug this and it will be a memory to talk about someday.

3 moms found this helpful

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

You created this mess and now you have to fix it.
You need to bring her back to bed every single time.
As for the little one falling asleep watching TV - please! Do your bed time routine and put everyone to bed. If they want to read with a flashlight, let them. BUT the rule is they cannot get out of bed until the clock says 7am or whatever time you choose. If they get out, you bring them back - again and again and again.
Nobody just falls asleep instantly... they need to learn to self comfort...
It will take some time and you'll have some very long nights....
But YOU have to fix it.
LBC

1 mom found this helpful
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L.C.

answers from Dayton on

I agree with Nanaglenda about letting them sleep together. It helped with my older two and now with my younger two as well. Little one will go to sleep better if she is laying down with sister and they will be less likely to wake up and come to you if they wake up and are not alone. We had one of those double/twin bunks with the full size bed on the bottom and my boys slept together in that for quite awhile and they slept alot better. We took the mattresses off our 3 and 4 yr olds' toddler beds and put them side by side on the floor and now they are happy, peaceful sleepers. It always reminds me of how puppies sleep in a pile. :)

And, yup, get a lock. Nothing kills the mood like having a little come in going, "Daddy, what are you doing to Mommy?"

E.A.

answers from Erie on

I asked a similar question about my 8yo. You can go to my profile and look up the question, I got great advice. Letting the kids sleep together is a great idea for the next year or so, but you can gently encourage them to learn to sleep apart, too.
Co-sleeping with your kids isn't evil or a bad habit, when it's beneficial to everyone. But I understand wanting that time alone with your husband, too.

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J.B.

answers from Denver on

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child... This book is awesome.

As sucky as it may be- take her back to her/their beds EVERY time they do this and firmly say "Silly __________, this is mommy's bed. You have your own bed. You sleep in your bed and mommy sleeps in her bed." Repeat, repeat, repeat.... It can take 10 days or more to re-establish sleep patterns. Also- maybe get her a white noise machine to help keep her brain in the snooze-zone...

Good luck

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V.C.

answers from Wheeling on

They won't sleep alone because you don't make them. As long as you keep letting them come to your bed, they probably will keep doing it. Watch a few episodes of SuperNanny (although their issues about sleeping are mostly about going to bed and staying in the first place), put a lock (even a little round sliding 'deadbolt' like are used as replacements on bathroom stall doors when the original gets broken), and be the boss. Say it, mean it, and enforce it!

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