Why Is 4 Such an Emotional Age!

My DD is 4 can get this way, but usually it's when she is overtired. Personally, I would just ignore them - let her run to her room, and don't give her any attention for her outbursts. She'll have to learn to get over herself and not act like such the drama queen. It's okay to tell her you are not mad at her and you don't mean to hurt her feelings, but really, that's where it needs to end. My daughter's approach is to walk away and sit pouting with her head hanging down. I will tell her I am sorry for hurting her feelings, but I also sometimes have to talk to that way if she doesn't listen the first time I use a "nice voice"

Think about it. She's been on the planet for 4 yrs now, and is figuring things out. Trying to process stuff with a 4 yr old maturity level is hard. Thats why when we have older kids acting immature we say to them "stop acting like a 4 yr old".

at four they are able to talk to you & express some emotions (not always in the "right" or conventional ways lol) but they are not able to control their emotions or understand that by you saying no in a stern voice doesnt mean you are super mad at her....she just knows that it hurts her feelings & goes off crying...honestly I think its completely normal...I try to talk to my daughter often & tell her I dont mean to hurt her feelings but that it is important that she knows that if I say no I mean it, or that even possibly I snapped at her out of my own frustrations...I just try to show her extra love & be understanding & tell her that it's okay to have emotions & to express them to me even if they dont seem to make sense...as a child I was very emotional but it was even harder for me because I was taught to not show those emotions & was punished for how I was feeling...so I try to be extra understanding to my daughters emotional days & tell them it's okay to feel whatever you feel & its okay to cry & its okay to not know why just to know that mommy & daddy are always here to listen if they want to tell us why or how they feel ....& it works, I am so glad that my daughter is able to tell me if she is mad or hurt by something I have done or said, no matter who is "right" I am just happy that she can express this emotion to me now & that she can tell me how much she loves me & appreciates our life even at a young age...its something that I still cannot do with my own mother

I watch 5 four years olds and let me tell ya!!! Lol. They are like little teenagers! Some more than others, but you know.

It's not a girl thing. It's a four year old thing. My son was like that - they do not have all the social skills, ability to process, etc that they will have as an adult. They do not have the physical dexterity either and they get frustrated. My son used to lose it when his lego refused to disobey gravity. A loud no - instant tears - somehow he could never see that ahead of time and it was always a horrible surprise to him. They just get better over time, I think it is a simple maturity thing.

I know this is going to sound crazy, but i want to say "SHE'S FOUR!" LOL... What you descibe is typical for a 4 year old. I actually took a class when my oldest was 4 called "Focus on 4's". It was a year long class that met two times a week. The parents went into a class for three hours while the kids had a seperate preschool class in a near by room for the same time. The class was amazing and helped me realize I was not alone. I will never forget the parent educator said "4s are like 2s; they come with a class of their own." The scary thing is they say how they are at 4 is what your teenage years will be like (LOL)... At 4 they are figuring out reality from MAGICAL thinking and that is very emotional.... Also at this age, they struggle with death and dying and the ideas of things being permanent. That is a lot for a 4 year old brain.... So just be patient and honor, respect and acknowlege the beliefs and emotions they have and this stage will pass. She sounds VERY normal.... Good Luck!

Wow! I am sitting here with my 4 yr old crying and apologizing for screaming/crying when she got hurt 2 hours ago! Always crying that she is a bad girl. She is very hard on herself. Tells us when she tells a lie and breaks down crying. She is critical of herself and its really hard for us to understand. We are pretty calm and most things roll off so we dont understand where she gets it from. We pick our battles. We tend to let the petty stuff just roll off. She is always afraid of making us upset and wants to please us with everything. Its draining at times. You are not alone!!!