Why Do We Work to Live???

I consider work to be what I have to do to provide for my life, my family. I prefer a job I love, but I can be happy at any job, because in the end it is all about the family.

I remind myself constantly that my "real life" starts when I leave work. I work PT and am thankful for that every day!

And you're so right...ask someone from the USA "what do you do" and they answer "accountant, doctor, nurse..." Ask someone from Europe "what do you do" and they'll answer "play piano, travel, hike, collect spoons..."!!!

There's a line in Fight Club "You are not your job".

I'm with you. Having spent a lot of time in other countries the idea the "work comes first" & "life comes second" is a VERY peculiar concept that I've only ever seen here and in communist/ dictatorial nations (I know, odd bedfellows). I could postulate possible reasons (personally, I think work-dramas on TV play a large part of it, but that's beside the point, because it's become the cultural norm and anything that is a cultural norm has MANY MANY influences behind it.).. but it's LESS important how it started than to throw the breaks on it and get it stopped, in my not so humble opinion.

It's ALSO a really, really NEW concept (you didn't find it 50 years ago)... and it's EVERYWHERE. Even a generation ago parents had COMPLETE AUTHORITY to pull their kids out of school as needed/wanted to illness, travel, vacation, family issues, etc. As long as the kids stayed caught up with their class, it was no problem. An "excused absence" was a note from your mom. Now, most schools take the attitude that "school comes first, family needs come second". People accept less and less control over their own lives starting from KINDERGARTEN. VERY limited numbers of absences are allowed no matter how good the student is or what the situation is. Notes from people OTHER than your parents are required for "excused" absences, and even then, your kids can be told to repeat a grade with straight A's if they've "missed too many days". School comes first. Work comes first. Longer working days, unpaid everything, work work work work work work work.

Talk about UNBALANCED. Talk about not being trusted to know your own mind and act within the dictates of your own conscience!

How did I find my dream job? Trial and error.

I actually have several dream jobs. I've had to quit 2 (military and outdoor gear tester) because they ***don't fit*** in with the life that I want to live. There are a couple of others that are on hold until my son is grown, and there is 1.5 in particular that I am actively pursuing, because it is PERFECT with the life that I want to live.

KEY POINT: LIFE THAT I WANT TO LIVE

Most people end up taking at least one job in their life that is TOTALLY unsuited for how they want to live their lives to fulfill the sacred duty that bellies are full.

TRICK: Only work those jobs while you figure out how to work a job that provides the LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE.

It can take years. But it is my FIRM belief that no matter who you are, there are jobs that "fit" you.

If you're not a morning person, why on EARTH plan to work a job for the rest of your durn life that means you have to get up freakin early every day? If you're not a night owl, why on earth plan to work a job that keeps you up late every day? If you this, if you that...

We ALL make sacrifices, but sacrifices aren't "better" or "more respected" than finding what SUITS you best. "He whose life is the hardest / gives up the most" just seems like a lousy thing to aim for.

I somewhat agree but for the opposing viewpoint, without having to work, look at what happens to some people... Life has to have some purpose and responsibility. I think about stopping working and then start to wonder what I would do all the time. And I look at the founders of the company I work for who are literally billionaires and they still work. I admire them greatly. And countries in Europe are falling apart even worse than the US... So I partly stay motivated by my desire to set a good example for my children. And I remind myself that people have always worked throughout history and plenty of people are bored in retirement anyway.

Yep, the lifestyle over here has a lot to be desired.
When I worked in the UK, I had 6 weeks holidays a year, and that wasn't including public (bank) holidays, which added another 10 days to that.
My hours were 9 til 4 with an hour paid lunch.
Sick pay, 4 months maternity with full pay.
This was normal, everybody gets the same.
Free healthcare.
Free childcare.

I want to go home.

A lot of people take a job just because it pays good money, not because it is something they want to do. I believe if you start out knowing what your passion is and what you want to do, you should always follow that dream. You can then build your lifestyle around your career instead of allowing the career to determine your whole life. It would suck to be in a position your entire life and be miserable. Life is too short not to go out on a limb for your happiness.

I use my disposable income to enjoy my family. I try to scrape enough off the budget to take us to do fun stuff together. I plan little weekend trips to the lake, ballgames, concerts, planetarium, so that we always have something planned to look forward to. I do holidays, birthdays, and milestones big! We never miss an opportunity to celebrate. I'm always on the lookout for free or frugal things to do, so that we are so busy enjoying our lives that we don't realize we are working 40 hours a week! That's my idea of making it work.

I have asked this same question since I was a kid. When we are children we see ourselves as astronuts--authors--award winning actors or musicians and then we hit Jr high and high school and the teachers and counselors start pushings us toward good solid careers. We get pushed into computer programing, nursing, secretarial positions and while there is nothing wrong with these jobs if it is not for us; we just won't be happy. Many people took those good jobs and worked for their retirement then did the work they had always wanted to do. Grandma Moses didn't start painting until she was 72.
I always told my kids; I don't care what you want to be when you grow up as long as you love what you are doing.

Another way to answer that is work is a means to and end but an end to a means. You work because you have to. You work to get to the next level. What is your means? High paying job? Ability to travel? To be financially secure where you don't have to worry about taking off two or three weeks and year and the bills get paid? If you could do anything what would it be? Can you see where I am going with this? You have to figure out if you want to have that very high paying job and make it the priority and have no family life. Or, do you want to have a good paycheck and enjoy life? I think I would like to have the check that let's me enjoy life.

Figure out what you wanted to do as a child and pursue it. If it is art take a job in that field. Digging in dirt how about archeology or such? Is there something you do or return to when all else fails? Well, that is your calling.

I don't plan to work forever but I plan on doing the things that I like.

Thanks for the question.

Good luck all. Now I will return to thread and needles.

The other S.