Whining Is Driving Me Nuts!

Hey girl, the last response was right, it's all part of motherhood, lucky us!! I am using sign language with my tot, who's 15 months, he caught on really quick and it REALLY helps!! He's able to tell me what he wants and it's kinda fun making him sign "please" whenever he wants something, he knows that I have the upper hand (well....I think that he thinks that at least:)). So my advise to you is to learn some sign, at least the easy ones, please, thank you, milk, juice, hungry, blanket, it is my BEST advise!!
Good luck
Z.

Welcome to the beginning of the terrible 2's (tho I thought 3 was much worse....) Now is when they start to test limits and parents. My Daughter would scream and yell at me when she was mad or upset, but never her father. I'm not sure of the reasoning behind it, but it happens all the time. But, then when she was sad or hurt she always comes running to me. I think it is a safety / comfort thing. She knows I will respond, and talk with her or hug her which ever is needed.

With the whinning, I would refuse to get her what she wanted until she asked me nicely. I would just tell her, "If you want something you must ask nicely." It took a while and she does still occasionally whine at me, but for the most part it ended. (she is now 4...)

He is communicating try using simple sign language. My son is 16 months and is kicking up the whining big time. Most of the time I can say, "what do you want," and he will sign it or say what he wants such as "up." You don't need a book to teach sign just look up some key phrases and just add it to the word throughout the day. Some great words are: food, water, up, finished (all done), more, sleepy, etc. I totally feel your pain...it really couldn't be more annoying. Any why do they whine so much more with the mommy?????

Welcome to motherhood. It is at that age that they START experimenting with voice and volume. Your doing right as far as quiet voice, indoor voice vs. outdoor voice. But, please know that this is a part of childhood and whining will occur. Mother vs. Father whining is also a part of it. I have three boys and have gone through this with all of them. Other mothers too have gone through it. This too shall pass. Don't worry too much. He is experimenting with vocal cords.

I feel ya...my daughter is teething right now too...and she is not easy to console:) Alas...one thing I can tell you is this it will pass. I can remember with my son going through some of these stages and feeling the same way. Looking back what seeemed klike forever was really only a few weeks. Couple of things, if you try to look at it like this is his very limmited way of communiucating, and he is also having fun using "his voice" right now to see your reactions, maybe it will help to put it into perspective. Also, they do seem to fall apart more when mom comes home...really don't know why, but they just do...probably I suspect they get a bigger reaction out of mom...because honestly most dads will think nothing of tuning out some of the whining and letting them try to figure it out forst before rushing over. We just rush. I hope this helps, and good luck I am sure he'll be through it soon.

Hi M. J -
It is something you are doing that has him whining more - especially since fine with dad. He certainly is seeking attention and thinks bad attention is as good as any. Try ignoring him when he whines and only give him things when asks nicely. Let him whine, you losing your patience, but giving in anyway won't teach him to stop...will just teach him this works. You can break him of it -- just be consistant and stick to your guns!
Good luck.
S.
Lisle, IL

At 14 months i wouldn't think you could expect him to use his words unless he knows sign or his vocab is amazing. I believe the key is to figure out if he's uncomfortable and needs cuddle time/ tylenol or if he's whining because he knows you will react to it. Positive reinforcement for the kinds of things you'd like to see. I read if you ask whats wrong or to point, its an not so concerned voice but more matter of fact it helps.

I read this in an article about whining, not sure if it works, but might be worth a try. When your child starts whining you can, like another poster said, ignore him or you could even try saying "I can't understand you when you speak like that. Would you like to try again, this time in a different voice?" It might take a lot of patience with the 'try again'/broken record technique, but maybe he'll learn that if he wants to get your attention effectively, he will need to speak to you in a usual tone of voice?