When to Stop Breastfeeding

J., I think one of the best reasons to breastfeed is to provide the antibodies for fighting sicknesses. With the winter months pretty much gone you should feel ok/better about stopping. I fed my first for 15 months and couldnt WAIT to be done. I lasted 10 with my second in case he was as smart as the first about it. Congrats for doing it in the first place!!

I only breast fed my 2 boys for 6 weeks. My doctor (who is a specialist in the pediatric field) told me that even if you only breast feed for 1 week it is better than not at all. I don't think you should feel guilty. You have done a good job and now it's time for you, too. I think you could stop any time. Good luck

I guess I see it from the other angle... why pay so much for something that is synthetic, full of man made things that isn't really the best for your baby when your body makes what his body needs and is made to use for free.

I just couldn't justify spending that much for formula when in reality its not all that great. You have 4 months until your baby turns a year old. That may seem daunting, but its really not THAT long, and at 8 months he should be down to nursing only a few times a day and eating solids, and moving to table foods. In a month or two he'll be nursing 2-4times a day, and eating more table foods. by 10 months he'll be nursing twice a day and eating mostly table foods.

I know its hard, and I know with BOTH my children I kind of his a breaking point around 8/9 months where I was like 'ok get this leech off me!' but I refused to pay for formula. I don't like the way they market and 'attack' new moms with thier stuff. Or the way they override the WHO code, or pay off doctors to push thier product. I just couldn't justify it.

Whatever you choose, your baby will be ok. But the benefits of breastfeeding are as important today as they were his first hour of life. He is still getting the fats and nutrients his body needs, the perfect food for his brain, bones, muscles. Plus he's recieving antibodies that will stay with him, fighting off illness and making his immune system super strong.

Plus, if he is your last baby, in a month or two you will enjoy those first morning and before bed nursings... when your baby is too wiggly to give hugs or kisses during the day. When he wants to follow his brothers around instead of snuggle with mom. Those will be your times together, and you will cherish them.

Good luck with your choice, you've done amazing to breastfeed for 8 months, and you should feel proud of that.

My honest opinion is that this is such a short time in your life that has such an impact on your child's! Think about it it's only a couple of years out of what 70-80 years of your life? I have been BF straight for 4 1/2 yr thought the 2 of my children & it can definitely be hard, but I will get through it knowing the benefits I am giving. Maybe people around you have discounted what it is worth. Also maybe you need more of a break. Just stick it out! The benefits to your child are life long! Here's some compelling info:
HELPFORM –extended nursing refs

http://iwantmymum.ipbhost.com/index.php?showtopic=49

Nursing toddlers benefit NUTRITIONALLY
Although there has been little research done on children who
breastfeed
beyond the age of two, the available information indicates that
breastfeeding continues to be a valuable source of nutrition and
disease
protection for as long as breastfeeding continues.

"Breast milk continues to provide substantial amounts of key
nutrients well
beyond the first year of life, especially protein, fat, and most
vitamins."
-- Dewey 2001

In the second year (12-23 months), 448 mL of breastmilk provides:
29% of energy requirements
43% of protein requirements
36% of calcium requirements
75% of vitamin A requirements
76% of folate requirements
94% of vitamin B12 requirements
60% of vitamin C requirements
-- Dewey 2001

"The estimated mean 24-hour milk intake was 548 g for the 97% who were
breastfed at 12 to 23 months and 312 g for the 73% who were breastfed
at 24
to 36 months. This represents an average daily intake of 41% and 23%
of the
safe recommended daily intake (400 RE) for vitamin A, respectively."
-- Persson 1998

It's not uncommon for weaning to be recommended for toddlers who are
eating
few solids. However, this recommendation is not supported by research.
According to Sally Kneidel in "Nursing Beyond One Year" (New
Beginnings,
Vol. 6 No. 4, July-August 1990, pp. 99-103.):

Some doctors may feel that nursing will interfere with a child's
appetite
for other foods. Yet there has been no documentation that nursing
children
are more likely than weaned children to refuse supplementary foods.
References

Nursing toddlers are SICK LESS OFTEN
The American Academy of Family Physicians notes that children weaned
before
two years of age are at increased risk of illness (AAFP 2001).

Nursing toddlers between the ages of 16 and 30 months have been found
to
have fewer illnesses and illnesses of shorter duration than their
non-nursing peers (Gulick 1986).

"Antibodies are abundant in human milk throughout lactation"
(Nutrition
During Lactation 1991; p. 134). In fact, some of the immune factors in
breastmilk increase in concentration during the second year and also
during
the weaning process. (Goldman 1983, Goldman & Goldblum 1983,
Institute of
Medicine 1991).
Per the World Health Organization, "a modest increase in
breastfeeding rates
could prevent up to 10% of all deaths of children under five:
Breastfeeding
plays an essential and sometimes underestimated role in the treatment
and
prevention of childhood illness." [emphasis added]

Nursing toddlers have FEWER ALLERGIES
Many studies have shown that one of the best ways to prevent
allergies and
asthma is to breastfeed exclusively for at least 6 months and continue
breastfeeding long-term after that point.

Breastfeeding can be helpful for preventing allergy by:
reducing exposure to potential allergens (the later baby is exposed,
the
less likely that there will be an allergic reaction),
speeding maturation of the protective intestinal barrier in baby's
gut,
coating the gut and providing a barrier to potentially allergenic
molecules,
providing anti-inflammatory properties that reduce the risk of
infections
(which can act as allergy triggers).

Nursing toddlers are SMART
Extensive research on the relationship between cognitive achievement
(IQ
scores, grades in school) and breastfeeding has shown the greatest
gains for
those children breastfed the longest.

Nursing toddlers are WELL ADJUSTED SOCIALLY
According to Sally Kneidel in "Nursing Beyond One Year" (New
Beginnings,
Vol. 6 No. 4, July-August 1990, pp. 99-103.):

"Research reports on the psychological aspects of nursing are scarce.
One
study that dealt specifically with babies nursed longer than a year
showed a
significant link between the duration of nursing and mothers' and
teachers'
ratings of social adjustment in six- to eight-year-old children
(Ferguson et
al, 1987). In the words of the researchers, 'There are statistically
significant tendencies for conduct disorder scores to decline with
increasing duration of breastfeeding.'"
According to Elizabeth N. Baldwin, Esq. in "Extended Breastfeeding
and the
Law":
"Breastfeeding is a warm and loving way to meet the needs of toddlers
and
young children. It not only perks them up and energizes them; it also
soothes the frustrations, bumps and bruises, and daily stresses of
early
childhood. In addition, nursing past infancy helps little ones make a
gradual transition to childhood."
Baldwin continues: "Meeting a child's dependency needs is the key to
helping
that child achieve independence. And children outgrow these needs
according
to their own unique timetable." Children who achieve independence at
their
own pace are more secure in that independence then children forced
into
independence prematurely.

Nursing a toddler is NORMAL
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children be
breastfed for
at least 12 months, and for as long after that as mother and child
both wish
to continue (AAP 1997).
The American Academy of Family Physicians recommends that
breastfeeding
continue throughout the first year of life and that "Breastfeeding
beyond
the first year offers considerable benefits to both mother and child,
and
should continue as long as mutually desired." They also note that "If
the
child is younger than two years of age, the child is at increased
risk of
illness if weaned." (AAFP 2001)
A US Surgeon General has stated that it is a lucky baby who continues
to
nurse until age two. (Novello 1990)
The World Health Organization emphasizes the importance of nursing at
least
years of age or beyond (WHO 1992, WHO 2002).
Scientific research by Katherine A. Dettwyler, PhD shows that 2.5 to
7.0
years of nursing is what our children have been designed to expect
(Dettwyler 1995).

MOTHERS also benefit from nursing past infancy
Extended nursing delays the return of fertility in some women by
suppressing
ovulation.
Breastfeeding reduces the risk of ovarian cancer.
Breastfeeding reduces the risk of uterine cancer.
Breastfeeding reduces the risk of endometrial cancer.
Breastfeeding protects against osteoporosis. During lactation a
mother may
experience decreases of bone mineral. A nursing mom's bone mineral
density
may be reduced in the whole body by 1 to 2 percent while she is still
nursing. This is gained back, and bone mineral density may actually
increase, when the baby is weaned from the breast. This is not
dependent on
additional calcium supplementation in the mother's diet.
Breastfeeding reduces the risk of breast cancer Studies have found a
significant inverse association between duration of lactation and
breast
cancer risk.
Breastfeeding has been shown to decrease insulin requirements in
diabetic
women.
Breastfeeding moms tend to lose weight easier.

References
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Casey CE, Neville MC, Hambidge KM. Studies in human lactation:
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References: Immunological Benefits

Immunological Protection by Kathryn Orlinsky

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state, and
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Hamosh M, Dewey, Garza C, et al: Nutrition During Lactation.
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Lawrence R and Lawrence R. Breastfeeding: A Guide for the Medical
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References: Allergies

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References: Intelligence

Breastfeeding and Cognitive Function Bibliography by Marsha
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Bauer G et al. Breastfeeding and cognitive development of three-year-
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Crawford MA. The role of essential fatty acids in neural development:
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Florey C Du V, Leech AM, Blackhall A. Infant feeding and mental and
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Horwood LJ, Fergusson DM. Breastfeeding and later cognitive and
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Lucas A, Morley R, Cole TJ, Lister G, Leeson-Payne C. Breastmilk and
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Makrides M, Neumann MA, Byard RW, Simmer K, Gibson RA. Fatty acid
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References: Social Adjustment

Baldwin, EN. Extended Breastfeeding and the Law. Mothering 1993
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References: Breastfeeding as the Norm

American Academy of Pediatrics. Work Group on Breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding
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The American Academy of Family Physicians. Position Paper on
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Dettwyler KA. A Natural Age of Weaning.

Dettwyler KA."A Time to Wean" from Breastfeeding: Biocultural
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References: Mother's Fertility

The Lactational Amenorrhea Method of birth control

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Diaz S, Peralta O, Juez G, Salvatierra AM, Casado ME, Duran E,
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References: Less Ovarian Cancer

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References: Less Uterine Cancer

Brock KE et al. Sexual, reproductive and contraceptive risk factors
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References: Less Endometrial Cancer

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References: Less Osteoporosis

Osteoporosis: Reduced risk with nursing? by Debbi Donovan, IBCLC

Osteoporosis by Kathryn Orlinsky, PhD

See Calcium for more information and references.

References: Less Breast Cancer (breastfed as child)

Freudenheim JL et al. Exposure to breastmilk in infancy and the risk
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References: Less Breast Cancer (mother)

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[top] References: Diabetes - Decreased Insulin Requirements

Davies HA et al. Insulin requirements of diabetic women who breast
feed.
BMJ. 1989 May 20;298(6684):1357-8.

References: Mother's Weight loss

Butte NF, Garza C. Anthropometry in the appraisal of lactation
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Dewey KG, Heinig MJ, Nommsen LA. Maternal weight-loss patterns during
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Heinig MJ et al. Lactation and postpartum weight loss. Mechanisms
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The benefits of breast feeding are unparalleled. There is absolutely nothing in the currently available, corn-syrup and gmo-based synthetic "milk" formulas that can compare with the nutrition of breast milk.

If you do decided to wean, please at least research better formulas that contain no artificial flavors, sweetners, corn-syrup, genetically-modified soybeans, or anti-biotic laden milk products.

Once you have found something that is as healthy as your own breast milk you will feel better about weaning.

This is really a decision you are going to have to make for yourself - one that you are going to have to be comfortable with. Either way, chances are you're going to hear comments from either side - breastfeeding and weaning is one of those hot button topics.

What the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends is to exclusively breastfeed for 6 months, and then to continue to breastfeed for at least the first 12 months and then for as long as mutually desired. The World Health Organization extends that out to two years.

Are there benefits to continuing to nurse? Absolutely. Are you going to alter the course of your child's life by weaning now? Probably not.

For what it's worth, my personal rule of thumb is, if you're feeling guilt at the thought of weaning, you're probably not really ready either. So then, you should probably ask yourself a couple of questions: why do you feel guilty? And why do you feel like you are ready? Answering these two questions may really be able to help you decide whether or not you're really ready to wean, and if so, help get you started. Or if you're not, help identify some areas to help you get the support you need to help you over the next few months.

In all honesty, I would encourage you to BF till at least a year. How many teeth does your child have? Ideally, you want to avoid giving solid foods till the child has about 8 teeth or till at least 1 year of age. Why? Because the child's 'leaky gut' has not closed till around that time. There is a saliva test you can have child take to determine if the gut is closed. By waiting till the gut has closed, you avoid/prevent food allergies from forming.

If you would like more info - PM me. Also look up 'leaky gut' on google.
I solely BF my kids till at least 1. (Then we added veggies and egg yolk first) We have NO food allergies.

HOpe this helps!
C.
-a holistic momma-

My honest opinion is that you are being selfish. The reason that you breastfeed is for the benefit of both you and your child. The longer the better. Formula is a very inferior product with cleaver marketing. It should only be used as a last resort- behind breastfeeding, pumping, or using donated breast milk. Even goat's milk is more nutritious. There is a big difference in children down the road, no matter what people say. No, you may not be able to look at them on the street and see the difference, but if you were to take a look at their medical histories and IQ scores you can tell who was breastfed and who was formula fed. There has been a lot of studies lately proving that the lining used in formula cans is causing health problems in children. There is a reason the World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding for the 1st 2 years MINIMUM. Pediatricians are not required to have any knowledge of breastfeeding and have money constantly thrown at them by formula manufacturers, so what do you expect them to say? There is a reason that you feel guilty- listen to your instincts.

Hi J.,
Sounds like you are a great Mom and enjoy your boys a lot! When to stop breast feeding is really up to you IMO. I suppose you could do the research on the benefits and such. Congrats for breast feeding. I breast fed my son till he was over 4 years old but he was also my only child so...
Blessings and Joy,
S.
Homeschool mom of 13 year old a I have a business on Mamasource.

Hi J.,
My honest opinion is nurse your baby as long as possible... I nursed my daugter for 27 months and weaned her just before our new 3 month old arrived so that I didn't have to tandem nurse. I plan to nurse my son for just as long or longer if he'll let me;-) My daughter has never even had an ear infection and I am convinced that it's because of all of the antibodies from being breastfed for so long. Breastfeeding is the optimum nutrition for your baby. Formula does not even compare... There are so many benefits for you also. One example is that your risk for ovarian and breast cancer goes down.. I would suggest doing a google search on breastfeeding benefits to help guide your decision. You will be amazed at all of the reasons to stick with it! Dr.Sears.com is also a great website. Since you are a stay at home mom you won't have to deal with all of the pumping to keep up your milk supply. Although it might seem time consuming, keep in mind that they are only little once and it's bonding time for you and your baby and the best nutrients imagineable! I hope that you will really take the time to read about all of the many reasons to continue breastfeeding. If you stop completely you may regret it one day... Good luck!

Melissa

Relax its ok to stop breastfeeding. Its very time consuming. I breastfed all three of my boys for no longer then 6 months. My boys are now 21 and 16 and have never had the chicken pox, even after exposing them numerous times to other kids with the chicken pox, i asked my pediatrician about this and she said it was because i breast fed that they got immunity from me (i had the chicken pox twice before I was 6 years old, first time was very mild) but i did make sure to get them vaccinated as teenagers though since we don't know how long immunity from chicken pox would last having been breast fed.
Plus since your son will take a bottle thats great, weaning him will go much easier. ITs more you enjoying the time you spend with your baby that you feel you will miss and thats what is making you feel guilty, its ok to feel that way, but you spend time with him in other ways too always remember that. And since you are thinking of this now then that means to that its time to wean, it will be ok and that your feelings are totoally normal. Good Luck and enjoy them while they are little because believe me there are some things I really miss now, like when they would cuddle with me on the couch to waatch tv. Hug your kids every day and when they become teenagers they will still hug you even in front of their friends. Take care.
J. in wisconsin

You know J., it is all up to you. You have given your baby the best for 8 months and have now gotton past the flu season. He is at the age where is is thriving and will be just fine. Medically he can not digest cows milk well for a few more months and would need formula, but know you have given him the extra boost in life already. You nursed him inside for 9 months, now outside for 8 now it is okay to let him fly. I know it is emotional, but this age is actually the perfect time to wean, they are so into the enviroment that they want to "get going" and do emotionally okay. I would not wean to a bottle though. At this age, just go straight to the cup and even start to pull the bottles. You can do formula, juice or any breastmilk you have left over frozen. To stop nursing is always emotional for the mom, after all you are dealing with a change in hormones. You can go to just one "special" feeding a day until your supply is down and hormones more balanced. Or, just be done and celebrate a milestone with your "big boy".

I just asked the pediatrician the same question last week and she said that it would be nice to nurse until 1 yr but the longer you can get the better. I have a 4 month old that everytime I think of stopping and would like to have my body back I also feel guilty b/c it is going so well that I think that I should continue as long as she is doing ok. Good Luck in making your decision, it is not an easy one!!

I don't think there is anything selfish about wanting your body back. Some people breastfeed for years and others don't ever do it. Yet if you were to meet the children down the road you wouldn't be able to look at one and say "he was breastfed" or "she must have been given formula". If you want to be done I say go with what you need to be happy. I was a bottle fed baby on formula that was a lot less than it is now and I turned out fine.
Whatever you chose make sure it is your choice and nobody elses! After all it is your body we are talking about.
Good luck :)

Hi J.,

I'm just writing to tell you my experience, not to tell you what to do :) First caveat, I breastfed my daughter for 2 years and 2 months. Second, I worked almost full-time (roughly 30 hours a week) since she was 3 months old and pumped for her so she was used to that. However, during those 2 years and 2 months, the experience breastfeeding and the amount of time/energy, etc. changed drastically depending on her age. At around 9-months to a year (the age I thought I'd wean) the time I spent breastfeeding dropped dramatically and I thought, "this is sooo different." Gradually it was only before naps and before nighttime and once during the night (because she was such a light sleeper and as a baby she was colicky and it'd soothe her and me back to sleep). Of course, when she was sick, it was more often. The whole 2nd year was completely different than the first so that's why I decided to just let it stop on it's own. Granted, I "encouraged" her nearing the 2 year mark, but she was really ready. At two years, 2 months, I went on a trip, came home and when she asked for it, I said, "Why not play a game?" We did and she asked for it again a few days later, same thing happened and then she forgot about it. Pretty easy weaning :)

I just thought I'd share what worked for us. Of course, we all know our own kids best and know what they need - every child is different aren't they?

J.:

Question for you... Is your second child any worse off for only having breastfed for 7 weeks? Probably not.

You need to do both what is best for YOU and the baby. If you feel that you want to be done now, you are not starving your child in anyway by substituting with formula.

As moms, we need to give ourselves a break! There will always be something to feel guilty about. Don't let this be it.

I am mom to one. I was a stay-at-home mom for 2 years with him. We stopped breast feeding at 9 months. It was a decision that happened really naturally... he was less interested, my supply went down gradually. He took the bottle and sippy cup with no problem. Since he was so close to 1 yr. we went right to cow milk- whole... again, no problems. Do what feels right for the two of you.
Deb.

If you're ready to stop and your baby takes formula fine then I think you should stop. You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. I nursed my children only for the first 3 months and they are now thriving, happy 15 and 11 year olds. I'm sure you're a great mom and won't be any less just because you're not nursing anymore!

This is really a decision only you can make. Only you know if you are both ready to stop breastfeeding. And like another poster wrote, if you're feeling guilty you're probably not ready. For me I breastfed my first for 11 months and started wearning to whole milk and he nursed for the last time when he was 13 months old. I was having a lot of trouble with supply and keeping up with him so I cut out pumping and just nursed hime before bed until 13 months. With my daughter, she is 13 months old and she is still nursed 2 times a day. She is not ready to give it up and I don't want to force her. I just have up pumping and other feedings she would have before meals. Of course I felt the same way as you, a little selfish for not wanting to continue breastfeeding. I started weaning her at 1 year and I am totally fine with it. I figured she has only had breastmilk for a year and she is still getting some breastmilk. I'm sure whatever you decide to do will be fine as long as you feel good about it. Just be proud of yourself for making it this far.

As you know, breast is best, BUT there's NOTHING wrong with formula. Hundreds of thousands of babies were and are raised on formula- they are happy and healthy. Giving your baby formula is NOT selfish, especially since you have given him the best stuff for 8 months.
I quit nursing my oldest after 7 weeks when we figured out he was lactose intolerant. I despise nursing for so many reasons and was thrilled to be done! I don't feel guilty at all. He's now 5 1/2 and has been as healthy as a little boy can be.
With my youngest, I pumped and bottle-fed him breast milk pretty much exclusively (he never really liked formula) for his first year. We found out he has asthma at 6 months.
Both of my boys are strong, happy, active, energetic, smart, funny, stubborn, and independent. They have healthy appetites and no food allergies.
Decide what is best for you physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially. At 8 months, your baby has gotten many of the benefits of breast milk and is most likely eating quite a bit of solid food. DON'T FEEL GUILTY, NO MATTER WHAT YOU DECIDE TO DO.

M. opinion is that you can stop whenever you feel comfortable with it. Once your child hits the 6-7 mo range, your breastmilk doesn't have enough iron or vitamin D in it, so you need to be sure that they are receiving it through another source (cereal or formula). I breastfed until 11 months with M. twin girls, but had to supplement a vitamin because I couldn't get them to eat cereal well. (They pretty much went right to finger foods). Now they are taking formula w/ iron until they turn a year (in about a week)! You are the only one who knows what's right for you & your child when it comes to breastfeeding. If it's starting to take it's toll on you, why don't you gradually cut out feedings & supplement w/ stored breastmilk or formula? This way it's gradual & a lot less physical pain for you!

Good luck!

Personally, I think it is okay to stop breastfeeding whenever you want to. You should do what is right for you and your baby. I think going 8 months is awesome and you should feel proud of that. I think it is bad that we can carry such guilt over this nowadays, or that the pressure from others, over what we do with our own children, can cause such anxiety. Remember...formula isn't poison :)

I know this is easier said than done...I will need the same advice when I decide to quit breastfeeding my 13 week old twins :)

Good luck!

Hi J., I was going to try it with my son for 6 months but my milk production was really slow so all I could do was 3 months then supplement with formula and breastfeed only once at night for a couple more weeks and pump during the day what I could get out. I was happy with 3 months now looking back on it and our next child I will only breastfeed for 3 months also if I can. I do have a in home daycare so it will be hard so we'll see, as for you 8 months you have done it for a long time already and you shouldn't feel bad for stopping he will be just fine on straight formula, I only did 3 months and Caden is just fine. Plus the longer you breastfeed the harder I guess weining will be. With the bottles I just took them away cold turkey but with breastfeeding it may be a bit longer of a process plus he will get to the point where he will be asking for it and know what it is then that is really hard to take away from them also. So the longer you wait the harder it is on your child and harder on you. Im not saying by any means that waiting until 1 year is not a good idea if you want to do that then go for it. If I could of done that I just wouldnt of but that is my choice. But if you want to stop then stop there is nothing wrong with anyones choice in how long they choose to breastfeed. People can recommend a year but you can make your own decission its your child and your choice and if he is taking the bottle and formlua just fine dont feel guilty. We were all on formula when we were little and turned out just fine. You will make the best decission for your son!

Hi J.!

When you stop nursing is totally up to you and when you are ready. If you talk to an 'expert' they will tell you to nurse for a year or longer. But you need to do what works for you and your family.

I nursed my 1st son for 4 weeks and couldn't keep up with him by 6 weeks he was on full formula. I nursed/pumped for my 2nd son for 3-4 weeks and then he was on full formula (again couldnt keep up). With my daughter I was determined to nurse as long as possible. I nursed her until she was 9 months old. I was 'ready' to be done at 8 months but did it for one more month. My doctor will let me put my babies on whole milk at 9 months vs some doctors wanting you to wait until the baby is 1 yr. I didn't want to go from nursing to formula to milk so I nursed the 'extra' month. Obviously if your child has other health issues that your doctor recommends formula/nursing until they are a year you should do as they suggest. My 1st and 3rd child had no issues so I put them on whole milk at 9 months. My 2nd son did have other health issues so he was on formula until 13 months.

I am all for nursing! BUT I am also about your own comfort level! I hate when 'experts' make people feel guilty for not wanting to nurse for very long or at all. You need to do what works for you and your family and not feel guilty about it. You have given 8+ months to your son, what a WONDERFUL gift! Now you can let others enjoy the bottle/snuggling time with your child.

GOOD LUCK!
P. (MN)

Honestly, do what's going to be best for you and your baby and don't let anyone make you feel guilty about your decision. I didn't nurse my 3rd child at all and feel totally comfortable with that decision no matter what anybody else has said. I nursed my first for 6 weeks but didn't have adequate milk supply and could not increase it either. My 2nd was a preemie and so I nursed her for about a month, but she never wanted to nurse because it was easier from the bottle. After pumping for a month, there was absolutely no supply...just not the same as actual baby. With the 3rd, he was also preemie, but I had no desire to nurse and I feel a happy mommy=a happy baby. Formula is so much more advanced now that it's almost as good as mother's milk.

I am a mother of 3 beautiful childern ages 5 1/2, 2 1/2, and 8 1/2 months. I never nursed any of them, and my kids are wonderful. I am all for the mothers for what ever they fill confortable on doing.. I don't think it is right for anyone to tell you that you are a bad mother if you do not nurse. Its your own choice. I know that breast milk is the best thing, but only if you are able and welling to do it. If you don't feel confortable, or just don't want to do it, then its not good for your baby. Your baby feels your feelings. You do what you feel best. It will not hurt your baby if you stop now. But it is your choice... Good luck.

I breastfed our youngest for an entire year, and only pumped for 2 weeks with our oldest. Even with such a big difference in the amount of breast milk they received they are both healthy, smart, funny, fun-loving, good looking boys =) Don't feel guilty, you gave him breastmilk during the crucial first few weeks and it would be fine to stop now. Especially since he doesn't mind having formula from a bottle. You made it farther than some moms (including me!).

J.,
I think if you are having negative feelings about stopping, you might want to keep going for a bit. I nursed four kids, each for about 2 to 2 and a half years, which was a bit longer than many people, but for me it was exactly right. When I weaned them, I did it with no regrets. What about going to one or two "comfort" feedings a day? I believe there are some immune system and brain development benefits still to be gained from breastfeeding at 8 months.
G.

First of all, Congrats on making it this far with nursing. I have always heard a year is the ideal minimum for health benifits. With my daughter, that seemed just about right for me. My son, however, had a different idea. He became really resistant around 8 months. He kept biting me and was really fussy when I tried to nurse him. So, I decided to let go of the idea of nursing for a year. He did fine and drank formula(something I thought I would "never" do). Point is: go with the flow(PUN) and followe your heart. Nothing is set in stone. You have already fed him 8 month of his life: good for you. That is a huge accomplishment.

I would try to go a year but it is hard! Even if you do it in the am and pm would be very helpful. I BF for 14 months and I remember the last day.... I said I am done I want my body back and put her to bed and never throught about it again and she was fine! I am having another baby and will bf again but a little worried about time. I had more time with my daughter then I will this one so I hope it goes as well.

Also Cod liver oil is the best thing you can do for you and your family I agree start giving it to everyone now. My little one has been taking it since she was 6 months and asks for it daily. She justs drinks it and is fine with it.

J.

Deciding to stop breastfeeding is, in my opinion, a very personal decision. My first son I breastfed exclusively for about 2 months - I tried to go another month pumping at work but had to quit and switch entirely to formula. My work environment wasn't supportive or conducive to pumping. My second son I went until 8 months...then I decided to wean him as I was going on a 3 day trip and didn't want to continue pumping. My daughter is 3 months old and things are going well but who knows how I'll feel by the time she is 8 months and getting teeth! I say follow your heart. Don't let that mother guilt get to you. If you aren't enjoying it anymore take care of yourself which in turn helps you better care for your son. If he is doing fine with formula and expressed milk he'll be just fine. I know people say breastfeeding is best and I agree but I don't think it makes any difference once they are older. He'll be able to drink cows milk in a few months, too... So do what you think is best for you...if you aren't enjoying it then it isn't a time to bond with your son anymore and has become a chore...

Whatever is going to work best for you and your baby! There is no selfish answer to when to stop bf, being a mom is selfless. I have been bf my daughter for 13 months now and there is no sign of her starting to wean herself and I am feeling ready to wean her. I know that it will probably be a battle so I am waiting until it warms up so I can take her out and keep her busy so she doesn't think about it. IMHO, I think that if he takes a bottle fine and you feel ready, wean him. I think the longer you wait the harder it will be, unless you are ready to nurse him until he is ready to wean himself. Good Luck!

I had a really hard time nursing, but worked through it and was really glad. Keep nursing as long as you are able and maybe at just certain times of the day. Perhaps you would make a point to nurse upon waking and at sleep times. Maybe that would lift the burden and guilt from what you are feeling. Even if you only nurse at say, bedtime, the benefits are tremendous, for both you and baby, health-wise and other. I would highly recommend a nursing support group such as La Leche League who can help you with weaning and not feeling guilty. Ask Dr. Sears online is wonderful too. Bottom line - make it work for who you are and what you want for your family. Someone said to me when my oldest was born, the days are long, but the years are short. This era in your life is very short lived. Whatever you do, savor the moments you have with your little one, as you know having other children, the time escapes far too quickly. You are fortunate to be able to stay at home - I am envious! Good for you!

We need to do the best we can do - thats a rspsblty we took on - becommg parents!
Well The average age for breast feeding world wide..... wait for it........... it's 4 yrs old - but thats also because in these stats you have very poor nations - which, their only option is to breast feed that long - in some cases. But with saying that, If you can at least make it up to a year this seems to be a good base for a child to start with. It gives a bit more of a boost to their immune system - epsecially through those doses of those nasty shots (vaccines) a child can recv up to 60 doses in total after the full schedule.
If you do choose to throw in the towel on BF... before this I stongly recmd adding a supplement of cod liver oil (daily) for the good A & D vit's because pasterized milk & Formulas just don't cut it (because the synthetic A&D have shown have oppist effect eg: softng of the bones rather then making them strngr etc... I could go on and on, but I have to get back to my own kids) - NO matter what anyone want's to say differenty! A & D vit's are crucial for all the other vit's in your body & and espically baby's body... to work properly -not including good cholestl for brain developmt! good luck with what you choose - A little about me I'm a Mom of a 4yr & 2yr (almst 3)old I breast fed as long as I felt I could 14mo for the first and the second one was due so I stopped and fed the second one for 12 moths I would hav gone longer if he would have contind.
Cheers, L.
****tip for taking cod liver oil - float it on top of a tiny bit of juice and shoot it - my kids line up for it and bug me until I have given they're daily dose (3 ml)(and my husband & I take it as well)

I think 8 months is great! You can't let other people make you feel guilty about stopping. You know when it's best for you and your body. Breastfeeding is a lot of work!! And you've given him 8 months already--be proud of that and don't worry about what other people think.

I am still nursing my 12 month old son. I am ready to be done, but he is still very interested in nursing. He does fine with a cup (he no longer has a bottle) at daycare and when I am not home, but if I am home, he wants to nurse. Do not feel bad (I tell myself this too) You did a great thing for your child. If he is taking to formula and your ready to be done then that is your choice. I am struggling to stop, I don't pump anymore, but he still want to nurse when I am with him. I will give him time and we will see. Things work out different for every family and every child. Do what works for you!!

The AAP suggest Breastfeeding for Two years. Their are still so many benefits to breastfeeding it's not like after a year all the health and brain building attributes disappear in your milk. If you can hold out for your son to lead the weaning it is a lot easier on the child and you. But if you really cannot hold out don't beat yourself up you have done a great job breastfeeding this long. Enjoy the moments you do have when they're small because as you know they grow up fast.

Hi J.,
I felt the same way you do about being ready to stop breastfeeding. I breastfed my daughter until she was 1 year. I was pumping twice at work but I switched jobs when she was 11 mo old so I started doing formula during the day and breastfed morning and night. That worked out good. Then transitioned regular whole milk when she was 1 year instead of both the breastmilk and formula. Luckily we had no problems but I did feel guilty too. It's like we're given this gift to be able to feed our children naturally and it feels wrong to take that away but I was ready to have my independance back. I'm just surprised I lasted a year! I think you'd probably feel good if you made it to a year. I was ready to give up plenty of times but just kept at it. Good luck. Whatever you end up doing you should feel good that you were able to breastfeed as long as you did.

Some people feel as if you are neglecting your child by not breastfeeding for 1 year. However, some mothers can't even breastfeed and there children have to be on formula since birth....do you think there children turn out any better or worse because of it. I was a purely formula fed baby, as were my brothers, and we all turned out well adjusted, close to our parents and healthy.

I breastfed my baby until 5 months and decided I wanted to stop. I have a busy job and it just wasn't working for me. Just remember, when you are happiest...you are a better mother. I firmly believe that. My son is now on formula and doing just great.

So you see, you need to do what is best for you and not let anyone or your self, make you feel guilty. Just remember...your child has been breastfed for 8 months...he has gotten plenty of the benefits of it by now.

Just my opinion...hope it helps!

I breastfed my first for three months, and my second for one year. Overall, my second has been healthier than my first, but who knows for sure if it was because of breastfeeding. I couldn't wait to be done after a year. I wanted my body back! It would be great if you could make it for a year, but if you don't that's okay. You gave your baby a great start to life! You have to do what is best for you too. A lot of mothers don't breastfeed at all so be proud of what you accomplished!!

Hi J.. I believe nursing is a wonderful experience. I wanted to do it with my first daughter, but she became jaundiced after I had brought her home from the hospital so she had to go back and at the time, they thought my milk is what made her that way (we're talking way before they knew much about it). So with that "fact" in mind, I didn't even try with my second daughter 4 years later. Fast forward 14 years and my third daughter comes along. I was going to nurse her no matter what. I wanted to experience it, it was cheaper and convenient (second marriage). Well, I nursed her for almost 3 years. I was blessed to be a stay at home mom, so I could do it for that long. We bonded so much and we didn't even do the formula route. We both benefitted from it. She and I are VERY close - I homeschooled her till she was in the 8th grade. All three of my daughters are beautiful, wonderful and healthy women so either way works :)

I'd say as long as you both want to and are able to do it, then do it. W.*

It is ok to stop breastfeeding whenever you are ready!!!

The staff who did home visits for me when my son was born told me that there is verifiable benefits to nursing for one year, and beyond that, there is little or no evidence of continued benefit. However long you nurse is good for your baby. I have heard that nursing for just a few days right after birth is still beneficial, even if the mom doesn't breastfeed beyond that. They call colostrom "liquid gold".

The benefits of nursing for the first year include a stronger immune system, less infections, etc.

I think that women should breastfeed as long as they feel comfortable doing it, and not any longer than that. My sister stopped after a few weeks. I went a year and a half.

I was shooting for 2 years, but I was ready to be done at 1 1/2, so I quit I felt sad during and after the weaning process, even though I knew I was ready to stop, because it is a loss of a special bonding time that you can never really replace with anything else.

You have to go with what you feel is best for both of you. If you are ready to quit, then quit- and try to let go of your guilt- you have given your baby the benefit of 8 months of breastfeeding! Good for you!

I felt the same way when my oldest weaned himself at 6 months. I nursed my second son until he was a year and plan to do the same with my daughter who is almost 8 months old. Just do what is best for you. I have decided to go to one year because that is what they recommend. Plus, my daughter won't take a bottle. Don't feel guilty if you want to quit now. I know so many mom's who made it to the 7-8 month mark and switched to formula. Be proud that you made it this far and were able to give your baby that great foundation!
Our children are all the same age. Let me know if you would like to meet and play some time!
Good luck
K.

I think that breastfeeding for 8 months is commendable! Good job, J.! I nursed both of my children for 6 months. I made a conscious decision to stop at that time--I needed my body back! After 9 months of pregnancy and 6 months of breastfeeding, I was ready to feel like myself again. Don't forget that the way YOU feel plays a very important role in your ability to parent your children---you need to take care of you, too! Plus, I didn't want to get to the point of resenting breastfeeding. I felt VERY pressured into breastfeeding my first child because of all that I read and I thought that it meant that I would be seen as a "failure" if I couldn't do it or didn't do it for long enough. What a bunch of malarkey! Don't breastfeed or formula feed just because you feel pressure from outsiders. These are your children and YOU get to make the decisions, regardless of what other people think is right. Whether completely formula-fed or completely breastfed or somewhere in the middle, babies come out perfectly healthy and happy in the end. I guess my point is that you should do what you think is right for you and your baby. (Although, I'm sure you knew that already, anyway!)

I have had to stop nursing early on with all three of my kids. So I understand the tendancy toward feeling guilty. Please don't!! You absolutely have to do what is good for you. Your little one has had 8 great months of mommy's milk! That is wonderful!! If you need to stop and take a break for you you shouldn't feel guilty. You have three kids to take care of and a household to run so don't feel bad if you want to stop nursing. Whatever you decide will be good for the baby. Hope your day is wonderful and God bless!!

I feel for you!! I went along the same pattern you did...
The first one though was the one that I did not nurse long, second child had breast milk about 6 months and then this last time I lasted until 10 and a half months. I too felt like you... unsure and on the fence. I did a heart to heart talk with my doctor. He assured me that if I stopped she will be fine and that the older two ended up fine without having mommy milk as long as she has.
Look in your heart, what do you want to do and be honest!

J.,
Do what you feel is right! Remember the ABSOLUTE most important part of the whole breastfeeding is the colostrum (sp?) that the baby gets that 1st day or 2 before the milk comes in (immunity wise). I only breastfed for 2 months, even though I loved the experience, my daughter just started weaning herself and was done the week before I had to go back to work. She is a healthy, thriving, intelligent 4 year old! She's even starting to read already! So don't let people make you feel like you're depriving your child by not breastfeeding till they're 1. Some people choose not to breastfeed and some are physically unable to, and their kids are just fine. I know they've done studies that claim breastfed babies are smarter, healthier, etc. But like I said my daughter was only BF for 2 months and she'd screw up all of their studies if they included her! Don't feel guilty. If you will be happier when you stop, it will reflect in your children! They'll be happier. Good luck with your decision!

I think that you're the only one that can really answer your question since you're the one that has to live with whatever decision you make.

If I were in your position, I would probably try to tough it out for those last few months simply so that I wouldn't have to buy formula. But I am incredibly cheap and can't stomach buying something that I can produce for free. At 8 months, you are already 2/3 of the way to a year and then you can go strait to whole milk instead of having to transition to formula in between. I remember being sooooo done with breastfeeding when my first was about 9 months old. At that point, though, I figured that I had already put in so much time and effort to keep her breastfed that I might as well just suck it up and keep nursing for the next few months and get to the magical one-year mark.

However, you shouldn't underestimate the importance of your own mental health and if weaning a little earlier would make a difference for YOU. I know that some people really love nursing and are content to nurse their babies well into toddlerhood. It's ok if you're not one of those people. Any amount of breastmilk you can give your child is beneficial, whether it is for 2 days or 2 years.

You NEED to take care of you too. One thing I did that I did with my 4 kids when I was ready to be done nursing was to just nurse them 1st thing in the morning and before bed at night. I still had my freedom during the day, but I still felt that "connection" when we could just relax. Bottom line, you have given your little guy a fantastic foundation of 8 months of breastfeeding. Be proud of yourself and feel good about that. By the way.....kudos to raising 3 boys.... I had 3 girls and then a boy....WOW, they are a handful!! Good luck with your decision.

J., I won't feel guilty about quiting. If it gets to that point where you are not into it and it seems more fustrateing then I would suggest to stop. I have 3 kids, oldest is 9 and I ended up only nursing her for 3 months. Not that i was planning on only doing it that long, but it just ended up that way. The second child is 4 now, I was alot like you wanting to stop and feeling guilty about it. I ended up not nursing her till she was 10 months old, there was so many times I wanted to quit but She refused to take a bottle so I really didn't have much choice till she got better with a sippy cup. The youngest is 20 months old and I nursed him for 8 months. He born 5 weeks early and now he is in the 75% for his age. So I don't think there is anything too important about those last few months. I have been told the first couple of months are the most benificial and important.

Alittle about me:
I am a stay at home mom of 3. Two girls ages 9 and 4, and one boy 20 months old. I also have 2 babies in Heaven, first lost was a little girls stillborn at 26 weeks, and second baby I miscarryed at 7 weeks.

Good luck, hope I helped some
K.

Go as long as your baby wants to go - or somewhere in that general area. I nursed for 14 months with my daughter. After 12 months, I would sometimes only nurse twice a day. It was a gradual stopping process. Until one day, I whipped it out and my daughter looked at me like I was crazy, went to reach for it as if she needed to apease and then swatted at it and then glared. I was like - well, that's that. And then we were done. The only people who were non-understanding were my in-laws, but I didn't give rats butt (sorry). They were upset when they would come to visit and I'd disappear with my daughter to go nurse cause they wanted to spend time with her. GIVE ME A BREAK lol. I didn't let it bother me in the least.

My motto: "Your opinion of me is none of my business"

Do whatever you feel is right.

Ann,

A happy mom is more important to her child's health than breastmilk. If you and your family are getting more out of the freedom of being able to get out of the house, then you have nothing to feel guilty about. (I personally found it more convenient to pack up my breasts than a bottle, but maybe that's just me ;))

Hello- I just wanted to let you know that you should never feel guilty- you did more for your children than many people do! I nursed all three of my children- the older two weaned themselves at about 10 months, and the last I did the full year, but I had started a new job and was supplementing, so he was getting more formula than breastmilk at about 9 months old. I felt guilty about not sticking with breastmilk, but I really enjoyed the closeness of nursing him at bedtime, and did that until he was a year. I still felt like I was getting some breastmilk into him, and yet I had the freedom of not having to nurse or pump during the day. I think with him it was more difficult because he is our last baby, and it just goes way too fast!

Best of luck with whatever you decide to do!

Sincerely,
M.

i dont think you are being selfish at all.

however long you nurse, there will always be benefits. i tend to be less trusting of formula, as it is, after all, made in a factory... how can we be sure it is always going to be safe? i am still nursing my 17 month old son, and i love every minute of it. however, i realize that not every mom is as joyful about it as i am.

it does benefit your son to have breastmilk until he is one year, then you can switch him to regular milk, in a sippy cup. you can choose to only pump the milk and give it to him in a bottle or sippy cup, if you want to try to pump a lot of milk every 4 hours or so, whatever schedule you decide, your body would adjust to that.

however, i understand if you want to just forget nursing and move on. that is fine. only you can make those decisions for you son. since i am such a fan of nursing, i offer my full support and encouragement to go through a year, but you certainly dont have to feel guilty for changing to formula. just think, you have for 8 months given your son the best you can give him. some moms either dont get that chance, or they dont even try. youve certainly done good by your son.

are you having problems nursing? is it a discomfort? is it a time issue, chasing 2 other boys cant be easy when you have to stop and nurse....

have you looked for a la leche league in your area? there may be moms with solutions to your problems, or the la lache league representitive (whatever they call themselves) could be able to help you with any problem you have. i recently called the la leche league rep in my area and she answered my question and it made me feel a lot better (my son was leaking breastmilk out his nose LOL. she said it is probably from an overabundant supply or strong let down - see, im lucky)

that is a great resource if you want to continue breastfeeding.

but, even though i really sound like im 'pushing' a little for you to continue, if it is not making you happy, if it is a bother instead of a joy, if it is something to dread looking forward to, please dont feel guilty about stopping!! 8 months is better than none at all. your son will be fine whether he is on breastmilk another 4 months, or if you switch to formula. its up to you - and if you want to just be cautious and are afraid you will change your mind in a few days, just pump a little here and there or when you feel sore, and if you change your mind, you can start again.

do what feels best to you, your kids and your lifestyle! and let us know what you decide!

While it is recommended to nurse until one, I think that it is your choice, and you should do what feels right to you, no matter what anyone else says.

I was unable to breastfeed either of my boys, and they turned out healthy and smart on formula, so I wouldn't worry too much about it.

Breast is best, but not breastfeeding doesn't doom your child to a life of misery and failure.

Hi there! I nursed my firstborn to 15 months (!) and my 6-week-old baby is formula fed because I'm on medication. I felt guilty not nursing my new baby but now that I see she's thriving on formula I'm okay with it. I'd say 8 months is a perfectly good start, you can wean off the breast without guilt, you've given your baby a very healthy start with your milk! That's just my opinion. You've done a terrific job of nursing! ~peace! :)

I don't believe it is true that mother's milk doesn't have enough iron or vitamins after 6 months - I think that's what mothers are being told. If you can, nurse for the 12 months as mother's milk is proven to be the best nutrition a baby can have in those first two years especially when Mom is eating very well too (and gives the child the best foundation for immunity and health in their adult years). Yes our children can thrive on formula, but I personally want my children to thrive on the best stuff out there and that's my milk (when I'm eating well myself!). Good luck to you.