When Do You Think a Child Is Overbooked?

Updated on September 13, 2007
M.M. asks from San Antonio, TX
8 answers

OK... So My son Is taking Golf lessons because he loves to play golf and wants to be better than Tiger Woods. My son is 9. My son also begged to be registered for Soccer all summer long. I registered him at the beginning of Aug but the first game isn't until the end of Sept. and will go till mid Dec. with one practice a wk and a game almost every Sat. He is also a new 4th grader and has Sunday classes at church. With all that being said... I spoke w/my husband & said I'd like to stop the golf lessons at least until he's done w/soccer. MH didn't like the idea bcuz he felt that my son would be giving up on something he likes. My thing is he is only nine and I don't want him overbooked. MH says golf lesson is only 1/2 an hour a wk. I still don't like it. Bcz with that half hour also comes the need to practice and work at as well as with soccer he will have to practice and work at it. Where does being a kid and watching some TV or playing a game fit in. I don't like it but I don't know If I'm being too lenient or maybe too easy. Just wanted to get some insight. See what the MAMA's thought. LOL... Thanks girls.

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So What Happened?

OK... So I think that you girls have totally put me in my place and yes... I too am a busy bee while he's in school. So I'll lay off making him lay off. We've been pretty fortunate to have a very easy to handle kid academically. He's always an A honor roll kid and he wants to do what he's doing. He's not complaining about being tired and we actually do have a family game night and a closet full of games. For those of you with older kids, we just bought the game "In a Pickle" and it's great. My son loves it and it helps the kids think creatively and broaden thier vocabulary. So my boy wants to play soccer and play golf and he's got school and sunday school. Sounds like he'll at least be outta trouble and it sounds like he's not as overbooked as I thought. Thanks.

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D.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi M.!
It sounds like your son loves being active and I think that is great. Most kids would rather sit in front of the tv and play xbox or ps2, rather than run around. I think, as long as your son isn't complaining about having to do so much, then I would keep him in golf and soccer. Let him try everything and anything he wants while he is still young and as he gets older he'll be able to choose one or two sports he is completely interested in pursuing. Also, you are very lucky that you only have one practice per week! Our 6 yr old son has football practice 3 times a week and our daughter has soccer 2 times a week plus an optional 3rd per week and all their games are on Saturdays, meaning we are running from one game to the other. Just have fun with it and support him in whatever he wants to do.
Take Care!
D.

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V.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Hmmm ok, it does sound like maybe a bit much, hoooowever. You could let the schedule run its course in the sense that maybe your son just wants to do things like that and can handel it as well. You will see in short time either he will be tired, grades slip a little, then maybe let go of something and rethink things as a family. You never know he might be able to do all of this, at this age its great to see him so active, it kind of kills me to see children who do nothing but school, then come home and watch tv.

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N.M.

answers from Corpus Christi on

If you're worried about him being overbooked then he probably is.... I would ask your son which activity he would like to cut back on or out completely. Give him a choice. As long as he's involved in something, let him choose. If he likes golf then give up soccer. Don't push him into an activity because it's something you like to do or want him to do. I hated when my parents did that with me. I wouldn't worry about his time being a kid too much. TV is not necessary. And I wouldn't mind if the video game industry became non-existant by the time my kids are old enough to play them. As long as your son is enjoying himself and isn't complaining, then I'd let him do whatever activity he wants as long as he's outside and active.

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S.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

First - TV is not necessary, and soccer and golf are both games. If you're talking about playing video or computer games - to be honest, they're not necessary either. Electronic media (IMHO) sucks your brains out through your eyeballs.

That said, maybe I'm biased. I grew up with skating (competitively), including 3 hours of lessons and 9 hours of practice a week, jazz, tap and ballet (for a total of 3 hours / week + practice), with alternately softball, clogging, gymnastics, sword dancing, belly dancing, and highland fling... oh yeah, and I took karate.

And violin. 2 hours of lessons and 7 hours / week of practice - junior orchestra at 9, senior at 14.

I made excellent grades (national merit scholar) and never ever ever went to parties, snuck out, or got drunk. I had a part time job in the summer and on holidays. I didn't have the time, and I didn't have the inclination to try drugs or try to 'find myself'. After getting over my toddler Sesame Street thing, I watched TV regularly for the first time after I got pregnant with my first child.

I chose ALL of my own activities, my mama went with me to almost all of them - we were closer than any other parent child relationship I knew.

I think that (even multiple) activities for kids (as long as they choose them) are AWESOME. They teach responsibility, discipline, good sportsmanship, teamwork, help avoid weight problems, and increase academic performance. I think the problem comes in when PARENTS are trying to overbook their kids in an attempt to impress someone or to relive their own childhood.

JMO, for what it's worth.

S.

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R.H.

answers from Odessa on

Hi! I feel like a child is overbooked if it gets into family time...meaning if you are having to run your son around here & there all the time with little time to spend quality time as a family, then maybe he's overbooked. I just believe in the family unit being most important in life!

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C.O.

answers from Brownsville on

I believe a child is overbooked when they tell you that they don't want to go somewhere or they flat out tell you that they are tired. Golf...Soccer...Church....I am sure he can handle the three if you can. Just observe and talk to your son to see if he is happy doing all three.

Then again, what do I know? My little ones are not there yet. I feel I am overbooking my children with all the things I want to expose them to...music and dance....nursery rhymes, books, math and science....

When my little ones seem life they have had enough, we move on to a different activity or just relax.

Take a deep breath and enjoy all your precious moments.
Hope something was helpful.

C.

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S.P.

answers from Austin on

Well, I don't have a lot of experience yet, but he sure sounds like he takes after his mama! You seem to tackle a lot and like to do a wide variety of things. I would say keep it as it is and if school starts to suffer than worry about it. Playing soccer and golf are better for him than sitting in front of the tv. Make one night family game night if that is important. Hope it helps. Believe me, you would rather have an active kid than a lazy one!

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J.C.

answers from San Antonio on

I think he is only overbooked if his schoolwork starts slipping or he complains about being too tired. I say be greatfull you have an active boy, let him enjoy being a kid the way he wants to be, healthy, active, involved. Don't jump the gun that he is being overwhelmed, it sounds like he is doing just fine.

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