What to Do with Child Who Has Trouble Going to Sleep

You may want to try Calms Forte or Calms Forte 4 kids. They sell it at Whole Foods. It has worked really well for my three year old. It helps her quiet down so she can fall asleep on her own.

Hi Judy,

I have a 6 yr old nephew who has trouble falling asleep at night because of his fear of being in his room alone. We have found that when we play music in his room at night it relaxes him and he falls asleep.

Hope this is helpful.

I'd encourage you to peak at the appropriate sections of "Healthy SLeep Habits, Happy Child." This will help you see if there are things that should be done to increase her sleep. i also think no tv, comp, phones in the room is good advise. I've heard good things about melatonin.

Also, I would encourage you to be okay with 1-2 hours of her laying in bed before she falls asleep. Perhaps she could use that time to listen to good chapter books one tape, or read. Solitude is somthing that few value in this culture, but can be a good thing.

You are not the only one-
Thanks for posting-it's nice to know I'm not alone.
There have been times when I thought my girls were asleep-
only to hear "mommy" an hour after lights out.
Sometimes- well all the time- it makes me perfectly batty!
I'll be asking my pediatrician about melatonin.
Good luck

Hi Mama- we solved this problem with story tapes! Adventures in Odyssey are my kids' favorites, and they're available at most public libraries. It helps them keep their bodies still long enough to get drowsy, and then they often fall asleep.

I'm unclear from your question whether your daughter is getting enough sleep. If she is getting enough sleep even having to get up for school or activities, I agree with the recommendations for quiet time in her room. If you feel that she may have anxiety or other issues that may keep her mind spinning, you may want to try a relaxation CD such as Lori Lite or similar. My daughter, also age 9, has always had a hard time falling asleep. Her doctor finally recommended melatonin. It is a miracle! You may want to run it by her pediatrician and see what the recommended dose is for her size. They may advise you to start out with 1 MG and go up from there to whatever maximum they recommend if not effective. I will tell you that I resisted this advice for well over a year, feeling that I shouldn't be medicating a child to sleep. However, giving her the ability to rest via melatonin has led to an amazing improvement in her quality of life (and those around her too :)

My whole life i have been a night person. Some people, including children naturally do better at night. I sleep so much better after midnight and best in early morning. The only back fall was I struggled with getting up for school my whole life.
I think if she has her own room and does not have problems with getting up during school, don't worry. I really believe people are different. I also believe there are people who will always need more sleep than other people.
Our son who is now 19 years old could easily sleep 10 hours every night and he has always been that way he likes his sleep and when he gets it he is ready to go.

Good Luck

Hi J.,
My 10 year old had the same problem years ago and his doctor recommended giving him melatonin, its totally natural, so don't feel bad about it. It works wonders!

Hi J. Have you taken her to see her pediatrican? Try reading to her or a glass of warm milk with ovaltine may help.

Hi J.,
My oldest, now 14 and currently a great sleeper, has generally had difficulties with transistions including from wakeful to sleep. When he was younger, during the summer months we would occasionally do a 'no electricity' evening, which meant not turning on lights as darkness fell. With the entire household shifting gears we would all head for an earlier bedtime with quiet talk and relaxation. These evenings were wonderful and encouaged all of us to get a little extra rest, which helped all of us enjoy our activity filled summer time together. It may not be a panacea but it is one more tool for your bag of tricks.
Good luck.
A.

I am concerned that at this age that growth spurts and pre-puberty are not making her sleep longer not less. Make sure their rooms are not simply small apartments with computers, TV's, phones(yes I know they might seem young but often parents will indulge a child who asks)as it disrupts sleep also these things in family areas help keep teenagers in view later for monitering their behavior. If a bedroom has the basics a comfortable bed, alarm clock, clothes and maybe a few books then a child doesn't have to decide a very adult decision of when to try to shut down for the night. I am unsure of their age at adoption, but if you received the child more than a few months old you have no control of things that may have happened with night, things that may bother or scare them or set them up for poor sleeping habits. Daytime insecurities are often worked through at night as well, find out what may be bothering her. If chatter is a problem(I know it is with my child), stop responding and let her talk herself to sleep...in her room.

If she stays quietly in her room, there is your time away. She may just need time to wind-down. Let her read a book for that hour or two. I would not recommend tv or texting though. That's too much unsupervised time and that could lead to much trouble.....and too much tv really does melt their brain and their morals.

Hi, J.. I know what you are going through as my 8 year old daughter doesn't go to sleep easily either. My fix has been melatonin. Melatonin is a non prescription pill that can be taken before bedtime. (There is tons of info on the internet.) For my daughter, who weighs 45 lbs., we bought the 1 mg. pills and split them in 4 pieces. She get .25 mg at night and in about 20 minutes she is yawning and very ready for bed AND sleep. It has worked wonders for her and I'm satisfied she is getting the right amount of sleep and wakes up with no side affects.

Good luck.

My family has lots of night owls, and I am one of them. I have never been one to be able to go to bed early. Since your daughter is 9, she really should not be much of a bother to you if she is up. Just have the rules be that she has to be in her room, not out and about snacking or watching tv or being on the computer or talking. I used to just snuggle up in bed and read until I got tired. It worked fine because I was "resting" and was not up doing things that kept me up or my family up.

You can't let them stay up longer just because they can't sleep. Summer is a little different story but being up half an hour later is plenty. Otherwise put them to bed at their normal bedtime or you'll have trouble reconditioning them for back to school. Tell her to lay there with her eyes closed and rest. She'll stay there unless you "give in" because you are MOM.

I know this will sound gross, but when we were younger, my mom would warm up some milk and add a little bit of butter. It would warm us up and we'd be fast asleep.

~C.

My kids have always been like this....however my 6 year old finally started falling asleep within 5 minutes once kindergarten started/naps stopped. However I now have my 2 year old having this same issue. I agree with the other post - the rule in our house is that it's bedtime, if you're not tired, you can read/play quietly in your bed, but you cannot get out of your bed or your room. My 2 year old takes trains to bed with him....last night I put him in his crib at 8:30 and he was still awake at 10pm when we went to bed. I think it's okay and some kids just don't need as much sleep as others....if you want time away where they are sleeping (with your DH perhaps), maybe you need to adjust their sleeping habits - this will take a few nights...but going to bed earlier and waking them up earlier...not sure what time she is sleeping until, but if it's late morning then that might be an issue. Otherwise, you are getting your time away in the morning too if they are sleeping late (and you're home). Good luck, but I wouldn't fret about it....it's not a bad thing..