What to Do When Making Foods with Pasta for Family but One Child Can't Eat It

If it were me, I'd just make a big plate of raw veggies and dip or salad for the whole family whenever I serve pasta. That way there's a healthy choice. Veggies are the healthiest thing a person can eat and ideally fresh raw veggies or salad SHOULD be eaten with each meal (less pasta). It will keep the digestive system healthy and keep the whole family at a healthy weight in the long run. Maybe you could compromise with giving him some of the pasta sauce like give him a bowl of the cheese sauce, alfredo sauce, etc. that he can dip his veggies in.

Children are often more intuitive than we give them credit for. Don't rule out the possibility that he may have a wheat allergy.

On the days you have pasta, why not give him whole wheat bread dipped in the sauce? He can sprinkle cheese on it, just like he would on pasta. Pasta and bread have almost the same nutritional qualities, and this way he is sharing the same meal.

It's hard, I know. I don't want to keep giving my son (who is younger- 13 months) a million different foods for each meal. But I also don't want him to go hungry. It's a fine line to balance.

Hi S.
I have an only child but have the same issue with frind's kids. My son has sensory issues and has NEVER eating anything 'slymie', aka: pasta, mac & cheese, casarole. He used to like eating the meat sauce with bread though, either diped or like a sloppy joe. So maybe a minium of noodles and extra sauce. It wouldn't single him out as much. Good Luck!

well maybe he truly doesnt like it? i mean, i hate lots of foods and there is no way i would eat them. if he eats likes of others things, he obviosly doesnt like it so adjust. i agree that you shouldnt make him his own meal or make him eat it. i find it great of him to actually continue trying it knowing he didnt like it last time. most kids wont touch something they know they dont like(or even try something new they never had to see if they like it).

instead of making it an issue, get some other things in your meal. just add something simple as side dishes and let him eat just that, and everyone else can have pasta and the side dish. will he eat the chicken out of the pasta? have some chicken or meat with sauces and let him have that. if you want a grain, give him a piece of whole wheat bread(but i wouldnt even worry about not having that considering he eats fine otherwise). think of it positively, its time to spice up the usual menu and maybe you will end up coming up with some new ideas and recipes that you never tried before. good luck, and i wouldnt worry.

Well, since you don't want to make something special AND you don't want him to go hungry, you're going to have to have a lot of sides that he will eat. Will he eat salad, you could always throw some kidney beans or chick peas on it, or chicken when you're having chick alfredo. Have bread as a side (might be too much with the mac and cheese, but works with the other pasta dishes. Also add a green vegetable like broccoli or peas if he eats those. Broccoli goes well with most italian meals (or broc rabe if he's a really good eater).

The other thing you can do is have a mandatory "no thank you helping". This is what we had to eat at my grandmothers house - for her it was a taste of whatever she had made, at home we had to "eat our age" - so, 3 forkfulls of pasta because he is 3 years old, 3 peas/beans/pieces of whatever you want him to try. So long as he eats whatever you require from the meal, he can have dessert (if you're having one), or he can have a "snack" later (a bowl of cereal, or some other nutritious filler, so that he won't be going to bed hungry, but you're not cooking special for him.

Good luck, just remember, you won't win a food battle with a 3 yo, it's one thing they can control.

I would just serve the meal and let him eat everything but the pasta. He can do the work of picking it out if it is his choice to not eat it.

I feel strongly about this so I'm responding. Your son sounds like a "good boy" who doesn't like pasta. Pasta is not life-saving medicine that he needs to eat to survive. It seems kind and respectful to not "make" him eat it since he "basically eats all other foods". I also have three children. One does not like red sauce. I once tried the book approach of "that's all we're offering tonight". She did not eat and was hungry. I felt terrible and regret enforcing such an unkind rule. It's setting a very high standard to expect our kids to like every food we prepare. I suggest offering just the meatballs if you're serving spaghetti and meatballs, a cheese sandwich if you're serving lasagna or macaroni and cheese, etc. On occasion I've offered my daughter a healthy cereal instead. (I wouldn't recommend preparing an elaborate alternative...just something simple. I also don't draw attention to it. It's done quietly so that it doesn't become a bigger issue.) If your son won't eat any food any time then that's a different issue but re: your post I think it teaches compassion to respect his strong dislike of pasta. Good luck.

We have one pasta eater and one rice eater. I alternate them, making sure there is enough left over for the next night. But each child has to try the other at least once a week, since I have not yet given up hope that they will grow to like it one day. The fridge is always stocked with yogart as well incase a meal is completely rejected.

I agree with you that as long as children are eating a varied diet, they should not be forced to eat things they really do not like. Perhaps a conversation with your pediatrician will help your husband understand this point of view?

Hi S.
Hope you are having a great day!
Pasta is a funny food if kids don't chew well. Have you tried alphabet letter pasta, it is small enough to just slide down if they don't chew well? Have you tried cutting his really well before it goes to the table? If pasta gets stuck in their throats even if you didn't know they don't want it again. Some people get full on pasta quickly, and others like myself could eat it all day and never get full. Does your family like rice, I would probably try that for a while for the whole family and have pasta less, because I don't make lots of different meals. Serve pasta as a side dish for a while. Then he can eat it or not and still have a balanced nutritious meal.
Perhaps he is fuel efficient when it comes to pasta and only needs a few pieces so 10 on his plate is enough compared to 50 on someone else's plate.
Has he had spaghettios? That would tell you if it was size, usually all kids like them even if adults think they are horrible. Have you tried any pasta soup? Alphabet soup is a great try, again for pasta size and gets away from tomato.
Having said all that are there allergies in your house?
Kids don't eat what they are allergic to unless forced and then they build an addiction type response. Just a thought.
God bless
Write me any time
K. SAHM married 38 years with adult children

Have you tried risotto, or is anyone in your family interested in eating risotto? What about other types of grains, like quinoa? I understand about making different dinners...and I also don't like to not feed a child just because they won't eat the meal that was made (my daughter recently had a day when all she would eat were pancakes - made from scratch, but still, not a great way to eat all day!). You could try making pasta with roasted veggies and a very light sauce (maybe just some olive oil and garlic, or sauteed tomatoes), and then he could have the roasted veggies without the pasta, and maybe some bread instead. The roasted veggies are very easy and don't take a lot of time to prepare- you can just cut up a lot of them, toss them in some olive oil and salt and pepper, and stick them in the oven (you probably know this :) Do you make meatballs? If you have a slow-cooker, you might try turkey meatballs and sauce in the slowcooker; he could have that separately while the rest of your family puts it over the pasta. I hope this is helpful!

I guess I'm not understanding why you want him to eat something he doesn't like. It's not like eating lots of pasta is a healthy thing to begin with - no matter what type of grain it is. An actual serving of pasta is only 1/2 of a cup. But even so - he doesn't like it. Give him something else.

As long as he eats his protein (the meatballs that you serve with spaghetti?) and the side vegetable or salad to make the meal complete, he's fine and eating very healthy. It is MUCH better to get your carbs and fiber from fresh fruits and vegetables, and it sounds like he's eating most everything else anyway.

If you are serving a one dish meal with a salad, like lasagna, have something else for him already prepared and ready to go. Let me give you an example. My son cannot have wheat, gluten or dairy. He also has sensory issues and food aversions, so there are things he just won't eat. I pretty much always make something separate for him. To make this easier, I prepare it in advance. I set aside time to do this. I make special single serving pizzas for him using his special breads and non-dairy cheese. I usually make about 16 or so in advance. I take the bread, put the sauce on it, then the shredded cheese, and put them on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. Then I set the whole pan in the freezer and let them freeze and harden completely. Then I transfer them to a freezer ziploc bag. Then I can simply take one out and heat it up in the oven or toaster oven while I'm preparing the rest of the meal. I also do this with gluten free pancakes. I cook them up, let them cool, and put 3 in each little ziploc for 1 serving, and put all the individual bags in one big freezer ziploc to store in the freezer. When we're having pancakes for breakfast (or any time he wants them), I simply take 1 individual bag out and toast them up while I'm preparing everything else.

I really hope this helps you out.

I think your answer is right in front of you -- just do for your son what your mother did for you. I was raised as you were, and I had a brother who could not eat many foods as a child. He grew out of that with time and was eventually able to eat anything. My mom never made a fuss about it. I didn't either with my children, in spite of serious in-law criticism. I tried to have choices by serving leftovers. So my non-pasta child ate yesterday's chicken when we had pasta, and my non-meat eater had pasta when we had chicken. We also went through a phase of plain pasta only -- very boring, so I just set up a series of bowls with things to add -- veggies, cheese, sauce, etc. -- another way to have a "different" dish each day without having to cook it. My children are adults now and eat all sorts of things. We laugh about the things they would never eat at home but tried when out with friends or at a boyfriend or girlfriends home as a guest. The key is not making the food a big deal -- the important part is being together for a meal and sharing time together that is fun. As long as pasta is the only thing that he doesn't want to eat, it's not a behavioral problem. And, from what you said, he is willing to try a few mouthfuls.

You might ask him -- not at dinner time -- why he doesn't like it. Is it the taste, the texture, the smell. Does it make his stomach queasy. Gather some info and talk to your pediatrician. His dislike might have a physical reason, such as gluten intolerance. He might prefer white pasta, or perhaps a multigrain that has a lighter taste.

I am sorry for the loss of your mother. My father passed away this spring in the early stages of Alzheimer's. My mother misses him terribly, but she has a wonderful group of friends who make sure she gets out to lunch, the senior center, and her exercise classes. They also invite her to their children and grandchildren's sporting events and concerts. I hope your father lives nearby you and can spend time with his grandchildren.

Good luck. Your husband needs to support you on this. Divided parenting leads to an issue becoming larger than it is because your children will quickly see when you disagree. Get him to focus on making dinner a good time with dad; talk about what he did today, about sports, etc. Even though they are little, they will pick up some of it, and most importantly, they will know that dad wants to spend time with them. That's more important than pasta.

My husband and I had this same argument when my kids were little until he forced my son to eat something he hated and he threw up all over the table. That ended that!!! I completely get not wanting to prepare separate meals for each kid, you would never leave the kitchen. What I would do is make sure you have some veggies handy or something he will eat. Maybe make pasta on a night when you have some leftovers so your son can eat that. I am not a believer in force feeding children I think they are entitled to have dislikes as well as we are. However if my kids didn't eat they couldn't have a snack or any dessert and they knew that. Risotto is another choice. Have you tried pasta with a little butter and parmesan cheese? My kids loved that. I also made a lot of past dishes with fresh vegetables like mushrooms, zucchini,etc. maybe he could just eat the vegetables. Pinwheel pasta is always fun for kids. Sorry fresh out of ideas. Good luck!

It sounds like your son has a good foundation for eating lots of foods - Perhaps when you all have pasta, give him the "sauce" or topping that you put on the pasta on the side without any noodles. If he likes pizza, perhaps he could dip some bread or whatever rolls (if you are serving that) into his sauce instead eating the noodles and you could call it his dipping pizza. It also sounds that you are paying attention to your family's diet, so if the few meals a week that you serve pasta your one son does not get the noodles as part of his complete diet I'm sure he would be okay. Stick to your guns about the one meal for your family thing!

We have an interesting assortment of food allergies in our family. As a toddler, one of my sons refused to eat anything with cheese. Later, we found he was allergic to milk products...!--Like his body knew something we didn't.
I had a husband allergic to wheat, a son allergic to milk, and another became a vegetarian (by choice.) I have learned creative ways to accommodate this crew without a lot of extra work.
Spaghetti? I make one batch of pasta, and one batch of rice. They can put their sauce over either one. I cook the sauce, then separate some out for the vegetarian before adding the meat. If your son likes bread, you could put his sauce over a roll for a sloppy-joe as opposed to the pasta.
He may grow out of his dislike, but I found "forcing" them to eat what they didn't like made the situation worse. I just offered alternatives without creating a lot of extra work for me. Later, some disliked foods could be introduced.

S.,
You said you wouldn't eat goulash - pasta - when you were growing up.

Chances are it is a texture thing. I think if you try tapioca, you might find he doesn't like that either...

I've been learning more about people who have issues with texture, not taste of a food (although it certainly affects whether they get to taste it!) and it's rather surprising.

Maybe it's hereditary?

Good plan not to force him to eat it. you might try doing pasta sauce separately, and giving him it over rice or potatoes instead. That way you're only doing one item separate.

Good Luck,
M.

Well Stacey, I have a 4 year old who doens't eat pasta either. So when the family decides that's what we are having I usually give him a kids TV dinner.Hope I was helpful

it could be a texture thing...some kids are very picky accordding to texture...not so much taste...on that note...I am a firm beliver in everyone should try it...not be forced to eat it but try it...we but a piece of broccoli on our children's plate's everytime we have it...we asked them to take a bite...now they are loading up their plates with broccoli by their choice...having 5 children(one with a dairy allergy) I tend to make everything seperately and then add it to plates at the table...so usually everyone can find a combination of what they like on the table...we put plain pasta on the table, 2 sauces, and then they can choose by taste (or allergy)...if your sons eats breads I wouldn't worry...if his digestion seems okay, I wouldn't worry...but next time you're at a check up if it hasn't changed...mention it. I have noticed in my expirence as a mother all my boys ate well until about 18 months...then they got picky and by 5-6 they seem to start eating more foods again..so at the moment we have one allergy, one picky eater and three that eat almost everything....

I just had to say, that's amazing. My niece will ONLY ever eat pasta, and my sister is always worried she won't get protein. Not likely meat/cheese/protein could be more challenging. Kudos to you for making homemade stuff!!

Pasta is not at the top of the pyramid. Continue to put on his plate, but only put those 3 or 4 bites worth. Put more of what he does like. As long as he's eating part of it then that should be fine. If he weren't eating the stuff that's really good for him that would be a different story. My 3 year old knows that he has to at least taste everything on his plate everytime. He's fine with that and will sometimes close his eyes, but he will always at least taste it. I thinks that's good enough as our taste buds do change as we get older. Also, my 3 year old doesn't care much for pasta either. I think it's a consistency thing with how it feels in his mouth.

I think that its ok not to eat pasta. He wont pack on the carbs. You said he eats everything else. He HAS a good diet. If you make it a big issue, then what happens when there are bigger fish to fry. Pick your battles not eating pasta is not going to make him a criminal or unhealthy. If its made available to him perhaps someday he will enjoy it.

I didn't read all the responses, but my first thought was maybe its the whole grain pasta. I know they say its better and once they like the refined flours they will not like whole wheat, but if its that or not eating... Like many have said just add veggies and meats to the meal and give him bread if you feel he needs more carbs. But I would try regular pasta and see if that is the issue or if its pasta itself.

Good Luck!

Since pasta is basically just a carb, I agree with the poster who suggested you just set aside some of the other ingredients in your pasta meals for your son and then allow him to have a different carb (even a slice of whole wheat bread with hummus on it or something). I'd be glad it's the carb he refuses, rather than the veggies or protein...Good luck!

Serve veggies and salid with pasta dinners....this child then can fill up on a healthy salid and veggies then if he wont eat the pasta. Put less pasta on his plate and don't make a big deal out of it if he doesn't end up eating it. We all have the right not to like some foods.

Hi S.,
First off don't worry about it. Children's tastes change. I would keep offering the pasta and let him eat however much he wants and if you feel it's not suffice offer him a piece of whole grain bread with the the sauce from the pasta...it's basically the same. It sounds like he's a good eater otherwise. Let him eat more of the sides if available, believe me your child will not suffer nutritionally. I also don't make my children eat what they don't like. I do however make them try everything and reintroduce anything they don't like periodically. And you're right don't start making 2 meals...will make you nuts!!
Good Luck and don't sweat the small stuff!

P. S. nurse and mother of 11 and 12 year old.

If pasta is the only thing that your son won't eat, then give him a "pass" and let him have something else - something that's quick and easy for you to make. I am sure there are things that your other children don't like, so make the same exception for them. As adults, we get to choose our foods and we avoid the ones we don't like...so as long as your son isn't refusing all foods, then don't worry about it!

Hi, Sometimes the things that our children do not like as well as like are not always good for them. As a child it took a renowed pediatrician to inform my mother. After becoming a mother I learned to listen to my children when they did not like acertain food.they were excellent with fruits vegetables and water when eating something like pizza one ate the cheese and the other the bread to this day one cannot eat whole wheat and the other cheese. They may be small but some allegies go un detected for a long time. Experiment with other foods.Also Keep his favorite carb in small freezer bags so he can have it when you are not up to preparing it. If it is not an allergy he will grow tired of it on his own.
C.

I agree with you. If your son eats everything else without a problem, why not give him this one thing? My sons didn't like rice for the longest time. I would still put a little on their plate and have them try one bite at each meal but I would make noodles for them as their main starch. Now they both like rice. It comes in waves. My oldest wouldn't eat spaghetti then eat it back and forth so many times I have lost count. Now if he complained every meal regardless of what you gave him, yeah, I'd make him eat it but it doesn't sound like that is your situation.

S., try adding things that he likes in the pasta- veggies, chicken etc.... you could serve him that wiht the sauce and leave the pasta out. Also, do you make soup or bruschetta, garlic bread with cheese, or something like that.... finally if you do serve dessert later, your might want to serve his favorite after a pasta meal- try bribing him to eat the pasta with that? I am not sure if it will work, but worth a try..

Good luck..

Dear S.,

I am not sure what to really tell you. If he really is a good eater other then the pasta issue I wouldn't sweat it. He is entitled to his own tastes and I guess he just doesn't like it. Even if he likes goulash it is in a different form. Don't force it on him. You could make a small problem worse for him. (As in a eating disorder down the line.) You mentioned that you didn't have to eat stuff you didn't like and he should be afforded the same. Good luck!! D.

You need to have other things available for him to eat. I'm not suggesting making him an entire meal but on nights when you are having pasta make sure there are a couple other things on the table that he will eat or throw together some left overs or something simple like a sandwich. One of my grandsons has an allergy to milk and dairy products so when I'm cooking I always make sure there are a couple things he will be able to eat.

S.,
I am so sorry for the loss of your mother, Alzheimer's is a hard disease to handle, both for the patient and family, just know that your mother is no longer suffering. Their is a song by Steve Wariner called "Holes in the Floor of Heaven", I highly recommend you listen to it or at least read the lyrics, I know it will help you as it does me.

As for your son not eating pasta, leave him alone. The more you push the issue the more he won't ever want to eat it. I have 2 kids who don't eat fish so whenever we eat fish I make them hamburgers or pasta, something quick that doesn't require a lot of prep and cooking time. If you do this then in time he may decide he likes pasta. Keep in mind our tastes change with age.

Hugs,
T.