My16 year old daughter was just accepted to be represented by a top modeling agency in our city. She is very smart, mature for her age, straight A student and so very excited to try this! We are so happy for her and are celebrating that one of her dreams of trying to land jobs is coming true - not looking for a career, just something interesting to try. We know that it is a very hard business, we have studied, talked to people and have done our homework. Its a waiting game and she knows that you don't always get the job, but even being considered for them is thrilling for her....I think its a really great experience and we hope to learn a lot along the way. Being under age, she will never be alone, I will always be with her and will have to sign release forms for any photos used of her - most jobs in our city are for commercial use.
The problem is my family, They just can't figure out why we even consider something like this for her. They are pretty conservative and fashion, makeup, etc is just not considered important to them. I am just getting some really uncomfortable feedback. My daughter has no idea her family would respond like this and I don't want her to feel bad about trying her dreams, so far I have said nothing to her, we are just doing our own thing and keeping "humble" throughout the whole process....She is not one to bring it up, thankfully, but I feel like I have to hide from the topic and am afraid it will come up over the holidays and she will catch on to the negative vibes I'm getting.....
and......we chose to take photos with a photographer before sending them in. It was not a requirement - they only asked for snapshots. She has already been sent out to a casting call for a major brand!
Thanks for all input, it's good to get different points of view.
Sorry mom but this is a scam. Reputable agents don't charge anything and they don't require professional photos.
Please don't fall for this!!!
If this is something she is dabbling in, she will be made aware of all kinds of different feelings on the matter. I think she should know. If this is a dream, this is an excellent lesson on follow those dreams no matter what nay sayers offer.
Your question of what is my take... I think it feeds into a narcissistic culture that I actively reject. What is modeling? Its value? I'm not conservative - not at all - but I don't see how this benefits your daughter in terms of her whole personhood. She sounds well rounded, you present as grounded, I just wonder how this contributes to her, to society, etc.
Just be very careful, and don't spend any money, not on classes or portfolios, photos or workshops or anything.
My nephew did some modeling as a boy. It required a fair amount of travel into the city (San Francisco) and he didn't always get cast, so it was often a waste of time (90 minutes each way.)
There are SO many scams out there, they have been around for years, and my kids and I have been approached more than once by these people, both times at Target!
Unless you are willing to relocate to LA or NYC and really go for it your daughter doesn't stand a chance.
Not trying to be negative, just realistic.
REAL agencies don't ask for anything, so if they start trying to sell you something, or refer you to professional photographers, turn and run. Save your daughter the heartbreak.
Sounds like you're handling it very well. I wouldn't worry about it. This can't be the first time you've had family question your parenting decisions. I can think of dozens of times I've been "offered" opinions and advice unsolicited from family, friends, and strangers. Do what you would normally do -- tell them thanks, you have it under control, and you'll let them know if you need anything from them (which you won't). If you try to defend or justify, you'll hear about it later, no matter what the outcome of her endeavors. Focus your energies on her, keep your ear out for their words, just in case they say something you might need to hear, and let the rest go and have fun.
I think that many people see models as frivolous people who have no real value in our society except to make normal girls feel too fat or too ugly. They don't have much good that is said about models.
Think about what you've heard about a models lifestyle. They get to eat a few hundred calories per day, that is unhealthy. They get to go to exotic places to shoot photo's. When in actuality they are standing on a beach in a bikini in 40 degree weather trying to look like they are enjoying a day in the sun so they can see their bikini's in a couple of months when spring starts.
Models are portrayed as being too thin, vain, and self absorbed. That's probably why they are acting like it's silly to have this as a goal.
I suggest your daughter start thinking about it this way. Pretend she's at a pageant and has just been asked what she thinks about models, how they influence society, how their lifestyles make young kids want to start bulimia or anorexia type lives for themselves.
They she could start practicing saying her answers to that. This way when someone asks her why she would want to do that she can give a valid non-goofy answer.
If my daughter, who was tall enough and thin enough and did want to be a model for a while, had been asked why she wanted to be a model she would have answered "I want my picture to be in magazines and on billboards. I want people to look at me and watch what styles I am wearing then copy me".
She would have enjoyed thinking that she was influencing people to be like her. What a head rush....
So if your daughter has some good reasons she can come back with when she tells someone she is trying to break in to modeling that make sense to the common people who just think of models going hungry or starving all the time she might be able to help the other people understand her reasoning.
I've modeled most of my life and my daughter (almost 18) models as well. We are independent and not signed with an agency because a lot of companies don't want the hassle of the larger agencies. We work with large corporations that are well known as well.
Granted, we are not full time, it's just for fun and neither if us have this in mind as a career.
The career models are hard to come by. Its a very tough industry. There is a ton of rejection out there even with calls for people who work independently. Please make sure your daughter can handle the brutal treatment and it not destroy her self esteem.
You should not be spending any money. Any money earned should be set up for her for education, etc. make sure she has good tax counsel if she makes enough money where she's required to file reports with the IRS and pay taxes.
Your family may be reacting in a way you don't care for because this is such a long shot and it can hurt you emotionally if you are not strong. Your family probably sees tv shows that are examples of how models can be treated and they are concerned for your daughter. Honey Boo Boo out on tv right now does nothing to help their opinions.
It can be a very rewarding experience. We've had some fantastic opportunities and we've had some that weren't so fun.
Keep her grounded and not let her head get too big for her own good. Support her and the first time she says I want to stop.... STOP!!
I agree there are problematic aspects to this type of path for a young girl, but I think with guidance from wise parents who are grounded in what really matters in life, this could be a great opportunity. The economy is so awful these days, jobs are hard to come by, so if this helps her pay for her college and/or advanced studies in some field, more power to you guys! Keep us posted and let us know if she lands a job.
I say screw the family and go for it!! My niece modeled when she was a little girl, her father was with her all the time and she socked the money away for college.
I would just ignore the family and if they are actually stupid enough to say something to her or in front of her then I would nicely ask them to keep their comments to themselves. Then after that, it's up to you to keep her grounded and level-headed!!
Good luck!!
