What Kind of Gift(s) Should I Get My Son After His Sister Is Born?

Hi Cristi,

I have never had this problem because my children are close in age, but I would suggest that you give him something that he is already interested in.

i think a big brother t-shirt would make him feel proud about his new sibling. i have a 6 year old and she loved her Big Sister t-shirt. She put it on soon after the delivery and to school the next day. Congratulations. K.

With a child that old, the best gift you can give is your time. Carve out special time every day for just you (or your husband) and your son.

My son was also 8 when his sister was born. I went to Zazzle.com and made him a shirt that said "I'm a proud big brother" on the front and "Big Brother AKA The Boss" on the back. I had them put my DD footprints on the shirt and then sprayed it with scotch guard, to keep the footprints from washing out. He was also present for the birth and was the first person, after the doctor to hold her, he was so proud. He wore that shirt for a whole month. They absolutely adore each other now, good luck.

I did not get gifts from new born to older siblings when mine were born. I did however make it known that they were important to me and to the new brother or sister also. I would take time to sit with them listen to them and play games with them when able. I would also ask them to hold or feed if possible their new sibling while I fix dinner of do something as simple as take a bath. Just be sure that they do not feel left out and still feel needed and loved. Have time to go places with just them a movie, dinner etc. Either you or husband. Good luck.

When my baby was born about 3 months ago. A couple of days before she was born I made t-shirts for my older two. The "I'm a big brother" and "I'am a big sister". My kids were so proud to wear it the day my baby was born. Then they both liked going down to the gift shop at the hosp. with their grandparents to buy there new baby sister a present. They were just so happy to see the baby and hold her that the shirts were all the needed. I remember that we gave a friend of ours daughter a button that said "I'm the big sister" when we went to visit them in the hosp. She thought it was the best thing.

Hi C.,
I was in the exact same predicament as you are now! My children are 8 1/2 years apart, with my son being the oldest. He had asked for a sibling for years and we finally decided it would be fun to have another little one around. Believe it or not, he and my husband wanted a little girl!!! Well, God answered their prayers! Our son is now a senior in high school and she is in the 4th grade. They are very close and she has been in "mourning" for his entire high school career, knowing that one day he'd move away to go to college. He was accepted to his first choice school two days ago! Hopefully, your son will be as excited and protective of his little sister and they will be very close. We let him choose a special baby doll for her, when she was born and it is also in the hospital pictures, right next to her face. He always made sure that baby was with her, wherever she was, and she grew quite attached to it. She still has it on her bed today! It was a simple fisher price doll, appropriate for babies; no eyes or anything that could be removed, all cloth. We then bought him several books on being a big brother. We also found a couple about big brothers and little sisters! Of course, we got the I'm a big brother and I'm the little sister T'shirts!!! (I believe the one for her we found at Babies R Us) I also made sure he was the first person allowed in my room, after she was born, and the first to hold her! I had my husband go get him AS SOON as I was presentable and we have some of the sweetest pictures of him holding her that you'd ever see!!! He also taught her her first spoken word---"Bubba"! I feel truly blessed everyday that God choose me to be there mom! I hope I've helped some and am excited for you! Let me know if I can help you with anything else! Kaylyn M.

When my daughter was born, she gave him a book. However, we had him pick out a special rattle for her and they exchanged gifts in the hospital. I think a picture frame would also be a good idea (then get a picture of them in the hospital to put in the frame). This isn't related to your question but before our daughter was born, we told our son that this is "his baby." Said they would be best friends and will always have each other. We reminded him how important a big brother is and how much she'll look up to him. We also asked family and friends to always acknowledge him first when coming to see the baby. Make his "job" as a big brother seem as important and special as possible. Remind him of these things often. Once you are home and the baby is born, make sure to give him lots of attention and special time when the baby is sleeping or you have someone to hold the new baby. Maybe it was just good luck for us but our son is wonderful with our daughter and she is 14 months old now. He loves her and still calls her "my baby" instead of by her name. He will often touch her and say, "I love her itty bitty face and eyes." It's really sweet. Congratulations to you.

Last year when we had our son our daughter was 7 and we got her a necklace that said Big Sister; she was super into jewelry and pretty stuff. So I would just say something that he would be able to keep forever that he will also like now. Sorry I can not come up with any specific boy ideas.

I was just as worried about her feeling left out. So I made sure that before anyone else was able to see him that she got to. The nursery was great about letting her go in with Daddy to see her new baby brother and it made her feel very special to have the opportunity to see and hold him before anyone else did (with the exception of Daddy).

Good luck and congrats!

I found a cute book "I'm a Big Brother" and a shirt that said the same. My older son wore the shirt on the day his brother was brought home. I also tried to have him help me get things ready for the baby. He took his "responsibilities" seriously! Best wishes.

I agree that giving the 8 year old a gift is a great idea, what it is will be up to you. I would recomend something that you think he would enjoy and would help occupy those times when you just can't give him your attention (sceaming baby you have to calm kind of moments). We actually got our son multiple inexpensive gifts (play doh, coloring books, $5 dvds) he could open whenever other friends came to visit the baby and bring the new baby gifts so he wouldn't feel left out. Having your son pick out a gift for the new baby is also a sweet touch.

Our oldest is only 21 months younger than his brother. I went into labor during the night and my mom brought him to the hospital when he woke up. He came in for a quick visit right when they got to the hospital and then again immediately after his brother was born. He was the first one in once the doctors were done with me (stitching, etc..). My husband held him up so he could sit on the bed with me and we kept him at the hospital as much as we could. Being young though he couldn't be there full-time and spent some of the day and slept at our house with my parents. When he was home my mom had him helping prepare a "party" for his new sibling (what kid doesn't like a party). He helped her bake a cake and put out balloons. It really kept him involved in the birth even when he couldn't be with us.

Dear C.,

How about a ceramic or wood statue that has a big brother being tender toward his little sister? If you can find that! That would be a visual reminder to him that he is her protector, and that she looks up to him. I would look at Hallmark stores. Or, a picture of the same idea.

J.

Hey C.,
I was the same age when my sister was born and just being able to help out with the baby and knowing my mom needed me and wanted me to help was enough for me. My mom always made me feel loved and appreciated when ever I helped her. She also had date days with each one of kids. A day with me a mom to do what ever I wanted. If you want to get a gift just give him something he enjoys but I don't think it is something you need to do as long as you let him know he is an awesome big brother and you love his help with the new baby.

B.
www.MoreForMyBaby.com

At that age there are several different interest, I would by him something pertaining to his interest. With that age gap you may want to remember after baby gets here how much of your time he used to have to himself with you because babies are so demanding of our time it can be overwhelming to the other child who used to have your full undivided attention. I've been in that boat is why I say.

My baby "got" my son a couple of books and a Magna doodle (which he played with while he visited, since he had very little interest in the baby at 2 years old!). The books were about life with baby.

He "got" her a little, baby safe, stuffed doll.

My daughter is 8 years older than my youngest too. We gave her a gift bag with things to do at the hospital. A deck of cards, some books, colored pencils and a drawing pad. I also took a picture of the two of them and gave it to her with a scrapbook and some fun papers so she could make her own "sisters" scrapbook.

Its been hard on her since the baby was born. I think she feels like she got replaced at times because she was never used to sharing her parents. One thing we tried to do was to have some one baby sit the baby and her and me and daddy all go out on a "date night." It wasn't something we could do all the time but I think it was nice for her to get our undivided attention every now and then.

Good luck and congratulations!

A friend of mine was in the same situation a few years ago. I sent them a baby gift and also a gift for the 8yo... coloring books, puzzles, a favorite of much desired toy - things to keep the sibling happy and entertained while you're busy w/ the new baby. :)

C.,

I don't think the idea of giving an older child a "token" gift is about the gift at all. It is about teaching nurturing and making sure they don't get "lost" in the activity that surrounds the newborn. You should simply commit to make sure that he never "feels" replaced or left out. I personally think it is more important to give siblings, say ~4 and under, something to "hold" while you are holding the baby. A small baby doll or stuffed animal allows them to emulate your actions and be tender with "their baby" while you are being tender with the new one. Eight year-olds are not as grown up as the world would like to make them, so your son is probably not too old for a cuddly token if you want him to learn to "love on" his (surrogate) baby. But if you simply give your older child a "toy" of some sort, it's purpose will be lost.

You and dad should commit to make sure that your son never "feels" replaced or left out. You can do this by agreeing with your husband that EACH of you will spend one-on-one time with your son, even when things are most hectic once the new one arrives. Get dad to agree to tend to the new baby's needs on a regular schedule while you spend time with your son. This time can be spent reading a storybook together (I favor reading children's' Bible stories daily, for creating a "special", memorable time with each of your children). Just make sure that the time is focused on some entirely unique and special activity that you and your son enjoy together. You should also facilitate this kind of time for dad to share with your son each day: you watch the baby so that your husband and your son can share a "special" time together every day. This kind of consistency and commitment does not "just happen." It must be planned. Do this and see how much greater impact it has than a one-time "gift" for your 8-year old.

Blessings, in Christ,
K.

Genesis 50:21 - "So therefore, do not be afraid; I will provide for you and your little ones. So he comforted them and spoke kindly to them."

Mark 10:14-16 - "... Jesus...said to them, "Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all." And He took them in His arms and began blessing them, laying His hands on them."

I've never heard of this but it sounds OK. How about a book he would enjoy or a game. A note from the new baby could be included with a request that when she is old enough maybe he could read the book to her or teach her to play the game. That way there would be a connection.

If he is into video games-handheld or otherwise- that might be a lovely gift from the baby to him. (and to you) It would give him something fun to do and maybe give you a few minutes to yourself. He is old enough that he probably won't be THAT jealous- he has his own life and friends at school. Make sure he still gets to have his friends over and that the social part of his life stays the same and I bet he'll be fine. Maybe get him something to give to her, also- how could he not be happy about something that requires presents all around!? With my third, the oldest (boy) got an Arthur doll, the middle (girl) got Kate and then they gave the baby girl, Baby Kate. And they got some new Arthur books...

My daughters were 6 & 8 yrs older than our son. His birthday was in December.I had decorated after Thanksgiving , presents & cards done in advance because I was older & had a few health issues & wasn't sure how I'd do after the baby. I had gifts s from "Samantha" to her new sisters under the tree. Of course, Samantha turned out to be John but the gift tags & cards were easily changed. My 8 yr old was very excited about the baby & wanted to hold him & push the stroller. My 6 yr old was extremely jealous through out the pregnancy. She wasn't too thrilled with her brother at first. My toddler would turn off the TV if that sister was watching alone but now they are very close.
Congratulations!

We gave my son a gift from his little brother. He was 3 at the time and he is really into Thomas the train, so he got a Thomas movie and some new trains. I also did some of the mess free "aqua doodle" books. I also found a button that lite up. He loved it. When my niece became a big sister to twins a friend gave her a disposable camera to take pictures.

My son turned "7" a few days before his sister was born. He too was an only child. I thought he would feel very left out but we just made him apart of everything we did before the baby was born. I didn't get him a specific gift, but we both went online together and I let him pick out/design his own big brother shirt. He was so excited. That was all he really needed to feel like he was apart of it all. It has been a year and he still wears that shirt. He is so proud.