Yesterday when I picked my son up from Jr. Kindergarten, a group of Moms were talking outside waiting for their kids. I joined the group. One of them immediately asked how old my son was and if he was starting Kinder this Fall. I told her he turns 6 in November and would be starting this Fall. She commented back to one of the Moms that was typical to start kids at that age and that 4 was still “a baby”. The other Mom sounded defensive said that her daughter was 4 but turned 5 just 3 weeks after starting Kindergarten (last Fall) and that she was definitely ready. She went on to say that her daughter is incredibly smart and reading above average, and that the teachers say she is the most mature child in the class. I piped in that my daughter started at age 4 and turned 5 a week after starting Kinder too. At this point I didn’t know there was a debate going on.
The one Mom who commented about 4 yrs old being a baby still, no matter if they turned 5 a week later, said she didn’t understand how parents could start a child at age 4. She said starting a child at age 4 was absolutely terrible and how could anyone do that.
When I realized this woman was blatantly insulting this other Mom I stepped in and defended her. She just kept going back to “Seriously, I don’t understand! How could you do that? It doesn’t matter if she was academically ready or very mature, she was ONLY 4!! I could never do that to my children. You’re setting them up to fail. I’m going to let my kids be kids for as long as possible.” My gosh, what the heck was she insinuating?? Sheesh!!! The debate went on for about 10 more minutes but I won't bore you with all the details.
She had to add right at the end that her 9 y/o is reading at a high school level and her 7 y/o was the next Doogie Howser while her 4 y/o (turns 5 in November) is off the charts academically but a baby and would never put her in Kindergarten so young.
I’m still dumbfounded by her lashing out at this other Mom regardless of her opinion and the fact that she was also insulting me! I had just said my oldest daughter was 4 as well, but she has been very successful.
Now I’m totally wondering what you all think = What is your opinion on this topic? Do you think starting a child in Kindergarten at age 4, just about to turn 5 is a really bad idea (IF they are ready of course)????
I sent my daughter to Kinder at 4... She was behind and still is and they will be holding her back.
Oh and she has an Oct. birthday, so not even a few weeks in more like a month or 2 of her being 4.
My opinion on this is that it's kid and family dependant. I try to do what is best for MY kids. I assume others are doing the same for theirs. And I accept that what seems best for MY kid may NOT be what theirs needs.
Some people need causes. It would be nice if they found ones that didn't include judging other moms.
Edit to add:
We gave my oldest son the extra year. Son 2 may not need this. For folks who have big issues with this practice, please keep people like my son in mind...
We wanted to give him time to "catch up". He has no developmental delays, but because of a medical condition, if we had started him at age 5, he would have, in size and physical appearance, looked like a 2 or 3 year old. I am soooo grateful pre-K was an option. He is now socially and academically right on track for his class, though he is still one of the smallest kids. We did not want to give him an advantage. We wanted to give him a CHANCE.
I CANNOT tell by looking which kids were "held back". In fact, the 2 biggest kids in my son's class are 2 of the youngest kids. People, including children, come in all sizes.
Well you walked into that one! I think it all depends on the child. My daughter misses the cutoff by 3 weeks. She is 5 years 4 months and 47", 51 lbs. She is about one head bigger then every child in the class, including the boys. She is a giant compared to the rest of the children. She is leap years ahead of one of the neighbors, as I can't even understand him when he talks. Waiting is fine for me.
If the school district says they're at an age qualified to start kindergarten, that works for me.
I will be sending my child in the fall. He will be 5 then. I think its normal to send kids between 4-6. Some are ready earlier than others. Do what you feel is right for your child. Don't worry about other's opinions. They don't have to live your life or live with your child.
M
Every child, is different.
It does NOT matter how "smart" a child is... their emotional 'readiness' differs. And is a key point.
Many schools, the entry age for Kinder, is 5 years old, per their cut-off dates, for school entry.
Keep in mind, if a child starts later for Kinder, at turning 6 years old, SOME schools will enter that child into 1st Grade. Unless, the parent requests to the school, that their child enter Kindergarten. Each school, being different.
In MANY States as well, keep in mind that Kindergarten is not "Mandatory." As well.
I have 2 kids. BOTH 'smart' and very bright.
My eldest, entered Kindergarten when she was 4... and turned 5 a couple of months later. She being late born. For HER... she was ready socially and academically. Her Preschool Teachers echoed the same thing.
As her parents, we KNEW she was 'ready' as well. And for her, SHE told us she wanted to go to Kinder, as well.
She had NO PROBLEMS entering Kindergarten at this age. She did well, all around and adapted fine. She is now in 3rd Grade. And is 8.
Half of her class though, was comprised of kids that were turning 6 years old, in Kindergarten.
My son, my youngest child is currently 4 years old. HE is different than his sister. Being a boy. He is 'smart' and very bright. I have registered him for Kinder, (he will be turning 5), for the fall. BUT, if I feel, he is not ready, I will have him enter at turning 6. For now, he seems fine. I have him just recently, in a part-time Preschool that I found and he LOVES. In just a couple of months, he has matured a lot.
At my kids' school, their 'entry age' for Kindergarten, is 5 years old. The age cut-off, is in August. If a child is 5 by then, they can enter Kinder. For the late born kids, they have a Jr. K. class. At this school, Kinder is NOT Mandatory. So, IF a child enters school at turning 6 years old, they will enter the child into 1st Grade. OR the parent can request, that their child enter Kindergarten, instead. They do a Kindergarten 'testing' of each child, per school entry. As well.
It really depends on the child.
Each child is different.
It is not true... that entering a child into Kinder at 4 turning 5 years old, will derail them and create their failure. That did NOT happen, with my daughter. At all. My daughter, is very successful in school. And has had NO problems academically or socially.
The Mom who had this issue, and got into a debate about... well that is just her and her opinion. EACH child is different. It is not everyone.
Kids will be kids.... per they way you raise them.
It does NOT matter, when you enter them into school... it depends on how you raise them and nurture them... at home and how you teach them things about life and the world.
all the best,
Susan
I am a kindergarten teacher and I must say that it depends on the child, but if there is ANY question I would suggest waiting. Babies sit up when they are ready, crawl when they are ready, walk when they are ready, so why should a child go to school just because they are 5? Age does not matter, the child's social, emotional, and academic readiness are what is important. I have had many parents ask me about this, some take my advice, some don't, but I have never had a parent sorry that they waited. I have had some that were sorry that they didn't.
Kindergarten is not what it was 15 years ago. Academics have taken over and kindergarten is the new 1st grade. If you have not spent time in a classroom in the last 5 years you really don't know what it is like. For a younger child this can be very stressful.
Another interesting thing to think about is that all those schools around the world, that are supposedly better than the US, start their kids at the age of 6. When they are really ready for the rigors of school.
It is important to know what your child is getting into. What are the expectations? What is your child expected to know and be able to do coming in, and leaving? And don't think that it is okay to repeat kindergarten...we are not a babysitting service, and many schools will fight retention.
It is okay to let your child be a child for another year...what is the hurry? A stimulating preschool may be a better place for a young 5 year old, and definitely for a 4 year old.
I have to say I am so tired of this debate. (In general, not because your bringing it up.) Especially because my children are fall babies...and it seems like I'm always drawn in on this debate.
My daughter started Kindergarten at (Gasp) age 4. She turned 5, four days after starting. My youngest will start 9 days before she is 5. I don't see what the harm is in starting kids. I am of the opinion, by the end of Kindergarten they will know whether my child can cut it, and if not they can do another year of Kindergarten.
But let me tell you this, while I don't believe my daughter is by no means at the top of her class, she is far from the bottom. Yet, she is one of the youngest. I could not imagine her even being in preschool this year, she would be way to advanced. She would be much more mature and she would be the tallest. My state's cutoff is Dec 1, so I don't see the point of holding my kids back when they are far from the cut off. Maybe that will change one day, but its been the same since I was a child. And somehow I made the cut, my sister made the cut, and I know of lots of other children that made the cut after me. (My mom ran a daycare)
I believe if a parent thinks their child is ready, then why not give it a shot. If they don't that's ok too.
She sounds like she's living in a dream world where she is the Queen of All Things. Some day reality will come crashing around her ears, it always does.
All kids are different, some are ready at 4 and some aren't ready until they're 6, end of story. Every situation is different and anyone so rigid that they can't even bother entertaining another idea isn't worth wasting your time trying to convince them otherwise.
This woman was not just mean, but she was wrong according to the data. Being yonger is a statistical advantage, and is actually setting that child up for success, especially a child who may have a learning issue, for each year you hold those kids back to "mature" them, you lower the number of years and hours that this child will have to get targeted intervention, and in so many cases, you set the child up for full academic failure. I see it daily as an eduational advocate.
Send your children to Kindergarten on time, even if that means that they don't turn 5 until the actual cut off, and start when they are 4. Send them if they do not seem ready, and then put the school on the case to help you figure out why, don't mask a problem with age. It is an educational disaster.
The data is so clear. Read about it at www.wrightslaw.com scroll down the left side of the page, and click on retention.
As for this outragous behavior, I would take note of it, and avoide her in the future. How nasty.
M.
What a beast that one is! I don't get why there is a debate. Doesn't the school set minimum age requirement. So what's there to talk about? My personal opinion- not that it means anything at all - is that kids are individuals. Some are ready before others. Those that have been in daycare since birth, for instance, would already be socialized and used to the routine and structure of school. Thos whose parents read to them often and gave them a lot of lap time would be well prepared. In any even, that hose beast had no right to alk to you two that way. She sounds very unlikable and insecure.
My sons birthday is Aug 21 and he will be turning 5 this year. He will be starting Kindergarten this year, we along with his teacher think he is ready educationally and holding him back would just hinder his learning and attitude. For some children the early start is right and for other it just isnt.
Some people say that boys are hard to potty train and take forever, but my son self trained at 2 1/2 so it really depends on the child and parents.
My daughter's birthday is Sept 3... 2 days after the age cut off for kindergarten. My daughter was absolutely ready for Kindergarten... so I searched for a school that would accept her AND offer a scholarship (since it had to be a private school - public did not take them after their cut off date). School started Aug 18 - almost 3 weeks before she turned 5.
She is doing VERY well, keeping her own and even one of the top in her class - and most of her class is 6 y/o's. If you hold your child back - that will only cause problems since they will get bored in school and be disruptive. If your child is NOT ready - there is no harm in holding them back to wait for the next year.
Studies and statistics show that it doesn't matter. Kids who are a little younger will forge ahead as they are supposed to. It all ends up the same in the end. Think about it - when you were a freshman in high school were there kids who were talked about for being younger and therefore, couldn't keep their grades up or were social misfits? No, because it all works out and very quickly.
I was not yet 5 when I entered Kindergarten and no one thought anything about it. The cut off was December 31st back then.
Too much is made of the cut off age these days. It's something parents do thinking it will make their kid be in the top of the class due to age. Older doesn't mean smarter. Let me tell you something, 6 months is not going to make any difference in whether your child goes to Harvard or the local community college. If only it was that easy!
Newsweek article - http://education.newsweek.com/2011/02/08/the-problem-with...
I guess I'll be better able to answer this question on a personal level in a couple of months or so. My daughter will be 5 late Nov. & I plan on starting her this fall. Our school district does Kindergarten RoundUp & will be evaluating all the incoming kids. If they believe that she is ready, then she will go. In her case, I truly believe that she will do great. I believe that it is an individual thing & only the schools & the parents are able to make the decision for each child.
The thing is, it's NOT up to that mom. States have laws as to when kids are allowed to start kindergarten, and the parents can decide if their 4 3/4 year old are ready - socially, educationally etc. Obviously the children aren't just turning 4 and parents are dropping them off in kindergarten. Sounds like you just might need to steer clear of her, because no matter what you decide, it will never be 'right' for her. Good for you for stepping up for the other mom, BTW.
And, saying that the other children are at a high school reading level, will be the next Doogie Howser - setting those standards and bragging seem like a much higher chance of setting her own kids up to failure if they don't keep up with their achievements and her expectations.
Yikes!
I guess that woman would have a lot to say about my boys then! Both started kindergarten while 4. We had a half day kindergarten. Neither had any problems.
The oldest is a freshman at an engineering school on Merit scholarships (and yes he was 17 when he went away to college), the next is a Junior in HS and in UHS/AP classes and thriving (and he was a 26 week preemie too).
So for us, no, it was not a 'really bad idea'.
(Of course, in hindsight, what the big hurry? I secretly wish I had one more year of them being home and I would've if I'd waited that extra year for kindergarten!)
:)
:)
In MY opinion, if they are 5 by Sept. 1st than they should be able to start. Of course some parents disagree and send their 4 yo that will be turning 5 in the fall to kindergarten. It really all depends. My daughter has a Nov. 1st Birthday. Our cut off is Dec. 1st - she did kindergarten that year (started at 5yo and turned 6). In our situation - since the cutoff is Dec. 1st here - I had the option to send her and was told she was ready. But I made the decision (because she is on the small side AND because I wasn't in a hurry) to do what I did. She is 8 now. In a 2nd/3rd grade split class and I couldn't be happier with my decision.
To answer your question - a 4yo, turning 5 in the fall starting kindergarten is fine if they are ready. My issue though is - why rush it?? It's not "holding them back" if they aren't 5 yet. I say this because that is how I hear it put - "Oh, you're holding her back" sad face :-(.... Um, no - she isn't 5. :-)
My son is in kindergarten now and it's Feb and there are STILL a couple of 4yo's. (private school - parents get what they want) It's so annoying because these kids in particular would benefit from the preschool program so much more than trying to keep up with the kids who've already done their time in preschool and are now of age to be in kindergarten. I don't get it. Sorry - guess I had a little venting there to do. :-)
After reading some very thoughtful responses, I do want to say and echo what other said - this is a VERY individual situation. What works for one may not work for another... My opinion is soley based on my experience at one place. I see the other side too. (yea, I'm not a confrontational person) LOL. :-)
I was 4 when I started school, I have a late Nov birthday so I was very young compared to the other students in my class.
Academically I did fine, emotionally I struggled. I was a late bloomer on top of it all (aunt flo didn't visit until I was 16) so there were many times when I felt more connected to the students in grades lower than mine, than with the students in my grade. I was plenty mature enough...but just felt like I didn't quite fit in.
So far I don't have to worry about this with my son. He has a summer birthday so will be 5 before school starts, but if I have a child that has a birthday in the fall...I think I will do as my parents did. Start school early (age 4) and see how they do.
My son was 4 when started K but had a birthday two weeks after school started.
I did have problems but it was more with his teacher than with him being in class. We moved to an area that really really stresses preschool and since I did that at home they had a problem with it. It didn't matter that he could write his name and stuff. I was frustrated because if we had not moved I would of gotten none of the phone calls and problems that I had.
I say (as well as many teachers) as long as the child can write his name (doesn't have to be perfect) and wants to go and finds it fun and has a good basics of things and can understand rules send them. I have seen many moms not be ready but the child is.
Plus it all depends on the school that they are going into. Some have taken nap time out completely in grade K. They don't even have it the first week of school. Some I think are trying to take snack time out. You have to be careful to see what the school system will do. Then let that be your guide.
My son is a great student. He is almost done with his year and still 5. Still can play games and act silly. I wouldn't say he has grown up much at all. lol
When I was in school, the age cut off was Dec 31st so if you turned 5 by the end of the calendar year, you started school. Around the time my son was born, the age cut off changed to Aug 31. His birthday is Oct 17 so in DE he couldn't start until he was about to turn 6. We moved to Maryland and their cut off was the same as DE's used to be so he started when he was turning 5 (every child there was in the same boat if their birthdays were Sept - Dec because they started when turning 5). The only problem he had was he was bored and the teachers didn't do much to challenge him so he lost interest...hated school after that.
We are back in DE now and my 4 yr old is ready to start to school now but her birthday is in Dec so unless she is evaluated and determined "gifted" then she has to wait until she is turning 6 to start. There has to be guidelines but her preschool friend is going to be 5 in May is at least socially isn't ready to start school yet (but will because of when her birthday is). My daughter is socially and academically older than her birthdate implies.
My point is what is normal depends on what you are used to. Certainly a child that just turned 4 is generally too young but a child that is almost 5 may not be. Everyone is entitled to their opinions but should be respectful when expressing their opinions which apparently this mom was not doing.
Depends on the child. My youngest started K at 4 and turned 5 about 2 months after she started. She's in 3rd now and doing really well. Starting her early was a good decision for her and us. I, myself, started (and ended) Kinder as a 4yr old, I turned 5 the summer right before 1st grade. I had no problems academically or socially and feel like my childhood was pretty great. There are other kids who are 10yrs old and still act like 6 year olds, it really just depends on the individual child. And for some mother to attack another mother for making that choice? Well, actually, I feel sorry for her - she's obviously overcompensating for SOMETHING. People who protest too much have insecurities about the very things they're protesting. Chances are, she tried to get her youngest into K early and was told "no way, not ready", and since it didn't work for her, it shouldn't work for ANYONE! Classic Aesop's Fable about the Fox and the Grapes.
It depends totally on the kid. I was a young starter as was my stepdaughter (getting straight As in HS!) and I did very well academically too. However, the concern I would evaluate before sending is how emotionally and socially ready they are. Looking back - no harm done to me, but some social aspects would have been easier if I were a bit older. My stepdaughter is doing well all around... My daughter is also in the same boat - would turn 5 3 weeks after kindergarten starts. I'm holding her back to be older... because of my personal experience, and I think it's best for HER. Bottom line, I think it depends on the child... and 4 is not a "baby" and that woman sounds very unhappy - don't give her comments so much weight. Just my $.02.
In PA, we aren't allowed to send our kids until they are already 5. They can start later, but not before.
I do feel it's USUALLY best to hold back until they are older, Kindergarten these days is VERY academic. But I would not berate a mother who chose differently, MOST of us know our own kids well enough to make good choices. We want so much to be GREAT parents, it's something about our culture, (lots of educated moms who Choose to stay at home to parent, lots of books, shows and advise on parenting) so we feel pressured to be really good parents that we get insecure and want to prove our choices are the BEST choices.
This is such a weighted topic, as it is becoming more and more common for parents to hold their kids back. It used to be just Nov/Dec kids were held. Now, it's common to see kids with Sep/Oct birthdays being held back, and even some summer birthdays are being held.
Right now, the cutoff date in CA is Dec 2, but over the next few years, it will gradually move back to Sep 1. So parents are now even MORE likely to hold their kids back knowing that the date is going to change anyway. It will basically ensure that all kids are 5 when they start kindergarten.
Anyway, my daughter has a bday in late October. I would have started her when she is only 4, but with the cutoff date changing, I will be forced to wait. So now she will be 5, almost 6, when she finally starts kindergarten.
It sounds like that lady was rude to continue harping on the same point over and over. If a child is ready, there is no reason to hold them back!!
K.
http://oc.citymommy.com - connect with other moms in your area!
I believe there are only 4 states that allow children to begin Kinder at 4 when they start school, as long as they meet the deadline to turn 5.... California and Michigan are 2 of those 4 states. I wonder if that woman use to live somewhere else, with a much earlier deadline. I have noticed that folks who live in states with earlier deadlines thinks that having a summer birthday is considered a late bday whereas people in Cali or MI most likely wouldn't and would send their kids without question. Ultimately, it is a personal choice, largely dependent on the child. I struggled long and hard, as my daughter turned 5 on Nov 29 (Dec.1 cutoff here)...and she is super bright, socially engaged kid. I chose to put her in Young 5's because our district has a fantastic Y 5 program... and I really didn't want her to always be the youngest in her class..... and the youngest by far as our area is really big on following the what most of the country does.... 5 by the time they start Kinder! To judge someone else on this decision though is just ignorant if you ask me.
I think it depends on the child.
Sounds like she had PMS.
My opinion is to start them when they are ready. And then to explain this simply, repeatedly and calmly when asked. I think my only other secondary opinion on the topic is that I would like to see schools consider separating the kids that were held back an extra year. My son who started at the recommended age (the 1st September when he was 5...And he was barely 5 being he's an August birthday), is physically dwarfed by the held-backs some of whom are 2 years older than him. That age gap will mean less as they grow but in K it is quite a difference.
So to this and all similarly divisive mama topics (like BFing, CIO, circumcision, SAHM, etc.), I guess I say "Who Cares?" and walk away. The debate cannot start and feelings won't be hurt if we do not fan the flames.
I think maturity and readiness should be key...not age alone. If the child falls within the SCHOOL's guidelines, I think the Mom of the almost five year old should tell the other mom to stuff it!
In Illinois, the child must be 5 by 1 September of that school year. Gone are the days when you could ask/tested to be "moved up" (for ex, if you turn 5 on 15 September), I do believe. If anything, most people are seeing the assumed benefits of being on the older side. In fact, we've got a bit of a "redshirting" issue where all of the sudden anyone with summer birthdays (where you turn 5 in the months just leading up to the beginning of school) is perceived as a bad thing because you'll always be the youngest and therefore, you are held back (and will be 6 by the time you start kindergarten). In my mind, someone has to be the oldest and someone has to be the youngest and that might seem like a stark contrast when they are young, but a recent study just came out saying that there is no real lasting advantage in the long run.
I agree that there was probably a misunderstanding somewhere along the way - as I said, her in IL the districts do not let anyone who is still age 4 begin, so there is your answer....
In most school districts kids must be a full 5 years old to start Kindergarten. The reason is that they will be 17 and turn 18 some time during their Senior year. That way they don't have to take a year off before legally being able to live on their own and can go to college right after graduation.
O.k. so Blabbermouth Mom was really being rude and probably feeling uncertain about her own choices and dishing it out on others to bolster her own confidence.
Unfortunately - in CA kids can go to Kinder at age 4yr.9mo. which o.k. for a few kids who can sit still for long periods and listen etc. My son is doing his 2nd year of Kinder 'cuz there were no Pre-K classes in our area and the Preschool was too unstructured for him and we foel 2 years of K would work out better for him. I really glad we went this route for our son - he excells at math and science but is a wiggly boy that has trouble sitting still and is still struggling with reading. He gets b's and d's confused constantly - so did I.
Anyway - according to the research I did on this subject- every kid is different - BUT boys tend to do better if you hold them back. Another reason we are delaying 1st Grade is because we are looking ahead to 7th Grade etc. and don't want him to be the smallest, most immature kid in his class when puberty and bullying are at their peaks.
I think 4 is a little early. Our education system in this country pushes academics way too soon, especially on the littles. Research is starting to show that it doesn't matter how much of a head start a child has, that by about ages 10-12 it starts evening out anyway.
I definitely think it's best to wait on boys. Their brains just handle the sitting still and everything like that much better. When it comes to the girls, unless there's a developmental delay where it would be best if they waited, if they're 5 by the cut off (Here, the cut off is before school starts. I didn't even know some schools let kids start K at 4 or that a cut off could be so late.) I don't see why they shouldn't start. So often, they're definitely ready for that environment. I know my daughter was, and she loved it.
However, my older son has a lot of issues so we did K with him for 2 years, the first year at home before we enrolled him in the school system (he was 6 when he started the second year). He's now in a mixed 1/2 class (he's in 2) and he's doing well (he relates more with the 1's though because of his developmental stage). Martha R., you're wrong that holding a child back, especially if they have developmental problems doesn't help and makes it worse. Can you think of being in a class where age wise you belong but developmentally you don't? You won't understand what's going on and every year you fall further behind. THAT'S what the research shows. All of the professionals that work with my son said he did so much better than if we'd pushed it and put him in sooner (He might be almost 9 but his developmental age is 7). That is not to say that we completely ignored the issue. He had a good support system in place and we worked with him a lot at home. What is your experience in this? Do you have a developmentally delayed child?
My younger son missed the cut off date since his birthday is in November so he was almost 6 when he started and because of that I think he got a much better experience. He was READY to sit still and learn. It doesn't matter how developmentally ready a child is, their emotional level has to be there as well and for four year olds, I just don't see that very often (of course, there are exceptions).
While I don't think the woman should have been in your faces over it, I do agree with her. There's a reason our education system is one of the worst in the world.
My son has a late birthday, Nov. 1. We've read a lot of books about boys and maturity and have chosen to start him when he's 5 (almost 6), rather than when he's 4 (almost 5). He's ready for kindergarten now, but from what we've read, he may have a harder time grasping concepts in future grades.
My daughter also has a late birthday, Sept. 22. I plan to start her when she's 4 (almost 5) because I've read that girls are more mature.
I can understand both sides of the argument, but for me this is the path I'm choosing.
I am an early childhood teacher. If a child has social, emotional, and academic readiness for Kindergarten at age 4, and the parents agree, I don't see a problem with sending them. I've taught many 4-year-old's who have done very well in school.
Great topic + timing :-) First, in our city ( which is a MAJOR city) there is no 1/2 day kindergarten, if you can believe it. All city schools are full day, had 1/2 day been an option - I probably would not be where I am right now. My daughter would have been a newly-turned 5 year old, upon entering K a few years ago. It was too soon for her, me + our family. I felt, that for in our situation ( I am 100% stay at home mom) There was no reason for my 5 year old to be gone for 8 hours a day. Luckily, we found cyber-school - which is rapidly emerging as a viable education option for many, in our state. My daughter is now in 2nd grade + is more computer proficient than most adults. It has worked amazingly well for her, we have enrolled her in various extra-curriculars ( Tai-Kwon Do, drumming, painting, Swimming,acting, zoo school) throughout the years to meet her social needs - As well as an after-school program, which she attends 3X a week for a few hours, with the local schools students. It has worked for our family + our son will follow the same path in September, when he enters cyber-kindergarten. I think the key here is that people need to do whatever feels right to them + not judge anyone for the choices they make regarding their child's education. I realize that cyberschool, most likely, would not work for most families. Just as sending my 5 year old to F/T school would not work for us. There will come a day when my children will walk through the doors of a brick + mortar school ( as cyber-schoolers call it - lol.) They will let me know when they are ready to take the plunge. For now, the flexibility that cyberschooling provides our (now) family of 4 kids, feels right to us + we plan to stick with it.
I looked at the big picture for my son. He would have been ready earlier, but what's the rush? I get to keep him a year longer and he gets a head start physically, emotionally, socially, and academically. I started K at 4, High School at 13 and College at 17. I was ready for the first two but could have used an extra year or two before college. I was extremely homesick and looked way younger than my age.
As with your story, I also don't think it is something to argue about or make others feel bad about. We are all doing what we think is best for our families.
I am also PRO-optional 1/2 day kindergarten!! Children will be in school for YEARS. Why overload them at 5/6 yrs old? But this is a whole other topic and I am sure I am in the minority on this one.
In my opinion as soon as a child is old enough to talk to you and tell you about their day they are ready for pre-K. Mental stimulation & socializing is never a bad idea, & typically while in pre-K the teacher will asses the childs learning needs & notify the parent if they are ready. & even if the teacher is unaware, (which can easily happen considering the juggle many children at once) you know your child. Everyone parents differently, & some feel there way is perfect but we all know that no one is perfect, & I have never met a perfect mother. You know what is best for your little one. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Good luck!
