What Do You Think -- Stay with the School or Move On ...

What? Why would you ever consider sending any of your children. If you honestly believe the school did something maliciously to harm you son, why oh why would it even be a question about sending any of your children there?

Not sure why you would keep a child at a school that violated your son's civil rights so badly that you are suing them? Wish you would clarify what happened. I would definitely take my child out of there if I were you. I do not think that you are being paranoid-of course the school does not like you. And they are probably treating your daughter differently because of this as well.

We pulled both of our daughters out of a private school (that we had really liked) because one of our daughters was mistreated there. (And by mistreated, I mean that as a 2 year old, she was punished for saying "no" to her teacher by being put outside completely alone. I did not object to her being punished, but I DID object to a 2 year old being left unsupervised outdoors.) Anyway, just so you have the back story to why we pulled our kids. At the time, my older daughter was distraught about having to leave the school, but honestly - if they would leave a 2 year old unsupervised (because they knew she couldn't speak up for herself), then what ELSE would they do?? We re-enrolled the kids a year later when the principal was let go and a new administrative staff was hired, and after having a conversation with the new principal about how our children WOULD be supervised at all times.

My question to you is, do you REALLY want your daughter to go to a school where they would treat a disabled child as your son was treated? (Was it more a lack of resources on the school's part - such as your son needed assistance with using the restroom, or eating, and they did not have the staff to accommodate him? Or was it that they were just being insensitive?) If the federal gov't got involved with a private school, it leads me to believe that the school was not being sensitive to his needs and/or not wanting him to go there BECAUSE of his disability. I don't know that as the parent of that child, that I'd want to continue to give money to that school....? Sometimes you have to take a stand.

Once in 15 years of teaching, a M. called the civil rights complaint hotline. She was embarrassed that the people she brought to the school meeting heard about a lot of crazy stuff her child did(stripping and telling how M. likes to throw her bra was the most awkward one).
A child was a constant behavior problem and the M. would not do anything to help so the M. was asked by the principal to take her child out. She played the race card and the investigator totally ruled in my favor and the school's favor. The parents who witnessed her violence and disruptions all wrote letters and called, rallying behind me. This includes all the other nonwhite parents. The investigator interviewed all sorts of people and her personal drama was made quite public when she brought her M. and friends for support. The investigator, himself the same minority as them, reported them to CPS and she lost custody for the crazy stuff that went on at home. It was a sad situation, but now the girl is safer than she would have been otherwise.

Personally, had she left another child in the school, everyone would be documenting everything to avoid another problem. Her financial aid would not be renewed. No one would want her there. The child would feel it and know that something was between them and everyone else. It also hurts your claim because why would you give the school a chance to violate another kid's rights?

If you daughter likes this school and you are happy with the way she is being treated, then you might as well just let her stay. It can be so hard for kids to C. schools and make new friends.

Try to look at your civil rights complaint against the school as an opportunity to improve the school, not a vengeful act for the way they treated your son. Hopefully, your son is attending a school that is more responsive to his needs. Maybe once your daughter's school is investigated, the school will become a better place for another student like your son.

Meanwhile, as awkward as you might feel, you and your daughter shouldn't worry about any backlash from school officials. Any kind of hostile act toward you or your daughter can be considered retailation for filing your complaint and is prohibited.

When I was in college, I filed a Title IX complaint against my university, and it turned into something huge. I was pleasantly surprised at how thorough and how seriously these complaints were handled. Hopefully, you will have some good results from your complaint. Good luck!

How much longer would she potentially be at the school before she aged out (for lack of a better term)?

If it were a long time then I would pull her . . . if it is a relatively short time then I might try to stick with it if that's what she really wanted to do (with reluctance).

For me it would depend on doing what is best for my daughter for the short and long term. It sounds like you have already done that with your son (good for you).

Good luck.

If it's awkward for you but your daughter is being treated well, is happy and is learning, I'd leave her there. This really should be about what's best for her so unless she's being snubbed because of what's happened, she should get to stay if she wants. I'm not sure what issues your son has but sometimes it seems like there's extra attention on the child with some kind of disability (natural) and the sibling has to sacrifice a lot. To avoid resentment, maybe don't make her sacrifice this...

Since the school is now being investigated and probably their behavior is under a microscope, if your daughter wants to stay I would let her. Just keep an eye on her feelings about and treatment at the school.

I would leave but this could be a good way to teach your daughter not to run from problems and to face adversity head on ... I think I would need more details as to the nature of her experience and the civil complaint to really make an informed decision.

Well, I think it is very possible that this didn't affect the teachers' attitude of you, but it did the Administration -- undoubtedly. It might make the school simply behave better with you and treat your daughter and family with kid gloves. I'm sure they aren't thrilled to see you at meetings and gatherings. But, your daughter is happy. Of course, there is going to be some bad feelings between the school Administration and you. The question is, do you care? I wouldn't necessarily care unless it began to affect my daughter negatively.

It could go both ways. They could either hate you because you filed a complaint and take it out on your daughter or they could be extremely nicer to your daughter because you put them on the radar.

Since your daughter has just 3 more years left and your case with your son is different, then I would keep her there. Just keep a watchful eye if anything changes and ask your daughter about her day without letting her in on your paranoia.

as long as they are treating her differently and she still wants to go there let her.

Put your daughter in another school.

If the school is so darn bad that you've filed complaints against them, why would you want to subject your daughter to the same lackluster experience your son received?

On one hand, you're pursuing a case against the school, on the other, it appears as though you sanction it's policies and procedures by allowing your other child to remain there.

if both your children no longer attend this private school, then they can use it as a stalling tactic, or as a handy excuse to have the case dismissed,
, saying, well, they no longer attend this school, why should we do anything at all? talk to other parents, like yourselves, whos children attend the same private school, they may have complained about the schools treatment of their children and been bullied into not saying anything, or had their concerns dismissed and then swept under the nearest rug
K. h.
the more people that have complained about civil rights violations, the more closely your concerns will be dealt with.
talk to the americans with disabilites foundation

I would pull her out. We had a situation with my son at a private school both my kids were attending . He was being bullied and when he finally had enough and retaliated against the bully he was being suspended and not the bully. The principal and the superintendent were not supportive of anything we tried to tell them. I pulled him out with three months left in the school year and we left our daughter in for the rest of the year only because we felt that she would be protected by her teacher (who was a former teacher of my son's and supported him.) We did not let her go back the next year and she still to this day wants to. It was a good school as far as the education they were getting but with the bully (who was asked to leave the school after I took my son out - guess they figured out where the problem was?) the principal and the superintendent we won't put our kids back in there. We were truly afraid that the principal would find something to pick on our daughter about if she returned.