What Do You Do When You're Babysitting Kids and They Don't Eat?

Updated on April 14, 2012
A.G. asks from Orem, UT
12 answers

Several times over the past few months I've babysat for some other moms in the evenings. It's usually last minute...generally between the times of 4 and 7-ish. Each time, I provide dinner for their children (not a problem...). I thought we ate fairly normal...definitely on the healthy end and trying to get better...but not way extreme or anything. None of the kids I have recently watched (3 different families...kids all around the same ages as mine)...none of them eat my food (??). I'm not looking for validation on our diet or wanting somebody to tell me, "Don't worry, your food is great"...my kids and hubby love it and it's generally good for them. My problem is...I don't know what to do when I'm babysitting and the kids don't eat. My husband is of the opinion - just put it out, if they eat it, they eat it, if not, they go hungry. That's what we've always done with our own kids (unless they want to reheat leftovers from the night before) - but our kids rarely ever don't eat what I've made. I feel bad however, when a mom comes to pick her child up at 7 and her kids have hardly eaten ANYTHING...I would not like it if my kids were suddenly famished at 7:30 - right before bedtime :/. I've done smoothies (not sweet enough), fajitas (the tortillas were 'brown'), potato cheese soup...I TRY to think of things that are reasonably kid-friendly. I asked if they wanted to just eat the meat (diced steak - not spicy or anything) and cheese from the fajitas without the brown tortillas...no. Even the orange juice I served was rejected because it had too much pulp. I'm fine with other families eating how they want to - there are foods that I don't make because I know my family doesn't like them. I still don't know what to do? It seems silly for me to keep white tortillas or no-pulp OJ around just for company. None of these moms have ever paid me - it's just been a favor for a friend (again, I'm ok with that...I just don't feel any pressure to go out of my way to get food we wouldn't normally eat). Would you be upset if you picked up a child from the babysitters and they were really hungry right before bedtime? If you have a picky eater, how would you want a babysitter to handle it? If you've babysat picky eaters...what do you do? I hesitate to use the word picky...because everybody has food preferences...my father doesn't like chicken nuggets, white bread, or mac 'n' cheese...*shrug*. Picky sounds kind of negative...but you know what I mean :).

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So What Happened?

Thanks for the suggestions! I think I'll just mention it to the parents next time...Maybe I'll just make it a practice anytime I babysit to say, "We'll be having _____....so and so is welcome to join us, there is plenty...but I know there are things my kids don't like, so if she'd like to bring something else, she's welcome to." I don't know why I didn't think of doing that sooner... :p. I tried the PBJ thing a few times ago but we do either homemade whole wheat bread or something with 'texture' (my husband's not big on bread with no 'texture'...lol...the rest of us have grown accustomed to it...but I used to HATE bread with seed STUFF in it...so I can relate other kids not liking it).

Generally it's understood that they'll eat over here...I'll ask the moms if they have any allergies, etc. Sometimes they wander around the kitchen for a bit after dinner asking if I have certain foods...but the two times that's happened...I didn't (ie...I had crackers...but they were soda crackers...not ritz).

Gamma G. - Yup, at first I thought it was just a one time thing...but after 3 different families...I figure my food must be odd! I'm OK with that...I'd have a hard time eating canned raviolis or a tv dinner...so I guess I can kind of relate to their disinterest in my food :). I hate making it an issue - I think that's why I've never brought it up before with the parents. This is good practice for me in communicating and opening my mouth!

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

I'm kind of suprised the moms don't at least drop their kids off with a snack that late.

I guess you can keep a few cans of ravioli on the shelves. But usually, when I have watched a few kids who don't like to eat what I make (I tend to do a little healthier meals like you), I usually get them to eat a few bites, then give them cheese and crackers and an apple or something.

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K.H.

answers from Indianapolis on

If I picked my kid up (after having the pleasure of a couple of hours away free because you were kind enough to watch them), all I'd need to hear is 'Well I offered them this, this and this and they didn't really eat much'. You tried, not much more you can do. Next time, ask the mom to bring something for them to eat if they don't like what you are offering. As the mom of a 'picky eater', I will bring food along for her, so as not to put out whomever is watching her.

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K.H.

answers from Boston on

As the parent of a selective eater (my daughter's term for herself), I do not expect other people to go out of their way to accommodate her eating preferences. I usually give parents a heads up not to worry about it and I often send her with something she will eat (e.g. applesauce). I'm sure your friend is happy that you are helping out in a jam and not upset that her kids aren't eating what you prepared. If it bothers you that much, you could ask her to send something next time.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I would not be upset with the sitter if my DD didn't eat well but food was offered. If food hasn't been discussed before, I'd call the parents or talk to them when they set up another sitting gig and say, "I've tried to offer June dinner when she's here, but she usually doesn't want to eat. I understand that kids are quirky and can be reluctant to try new foods. Is there a snack you would like to send so she's not starving at pick up time?" And then offer it at dinner or at a snack time for your own kids. Since it's a favor for a friend, you should be able to discuss it with her. It may be that she's fine with the kid going hungry until dinner is served at home. You might also consider keeping something simple like PB&J for kids who otherwise don't eat. It's not much effort and most kids (unless they are allergic!) like PB&J sandwiches. Your friend should be fine with "We had x for dinner, but June really didn't eat."

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

After the first time I would suggest to the parent(s) to bring something since last time they did not eat. Some kids just will not eat food they are not sure of and some kids (like mine) will eat whatever is in front of them. It just is what it is and I would talk to the parents BEFORE you make plans again that Tommy and Sally did not eat well last time and you think it's simply becuase 'i'ts not my mommy's food' and we all understand kids and change, so if it's not too much trouble please bring something for them to eat with - we can do a brown bag picnic dinner - it will be fun!

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I.M.

answers from New York on

I would tell the parents to bring them with their dinner. I have a friend of my daughter that I love to death, I told her that next time we buy a house it will have a bedroom just for her :) But she is a very picky eater, so when she comes for a sleepover she brings her own food, which are mostly frozen foods. She eats cereal without milk!!! No juices unless is apple. So at least her mother and I are under the same understanding, she can stay at my house whenever she wants but only if she brings her food! lol
Just talk to the parents :)
Blessings

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S.Q.

answers from Bellingham on

I wouldn't be upset. I agree with your husband. Two out of three of my children are picky stubborn eaters. If they don't eat what we've cooked, then they don't eat. It's their choice, and i provide child-friendly food. I mean, what sort of kid doesn't like mashed potato? They won't starve.

M.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I know my kids, and there likes and dislikes. Generally one of them hates anything and its a fight to feed her myself. The other one is a bit shy to ask for anything and direct questions will make her clam up. She eats well, but its more of a game with her. She has no problem eating my sisters cooking, my close friends, or my in-laws. However I have had a few others watch her very seldom, and they have had problems getting her to eat anything other than snacks. Going into it, I am aware of my kids issues, if they dont eat at the sitters, then they get asked once, when we get home if they are hungry. Then if they are not, they go to bed hungry. My littlest now is a year and just getting into the eating thing. I am fine if a sitter is ok with feeding him baby food and a sippy of milk. I never feel bad if they dont eat. I know them. It is AWESOME you try to feed them, and a large home cooked meal at that! Its above and beyond a sitters need! Kudos! can you come to MN to babysit?

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

My thoughts are this:

Since 3 different families have done the same thing then sweetie, your food is odd to them all. It would be odd to me and my kids would not eat it either.

I would tell the parents next time they need you to watch thier kids they need to provide their dinner. Else their kids will go hungry.

They do not eat like you so you must either provide them with normal food or have the parents send food with them. They could bring a can of Ravioli's of Spaghetti O's, a TV Dinner, a frozen pizza, something from the family's fridge or freezer.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I would be upset, however, only if I thought that the babysitter didn't offer them anything. If something is offered and they decline, then there's nothing more I can do.

You might want to start telling the mom when she asks what you plan to have for dinner and tell her if her child(ren) doesn't like that or won't eat that, to please either feed them before they come or have them bring a little something you can reheat for them. Let the mom know that you've noticed that they don't normally eat what you serve - that your eating habits are just different and you don't want their child to be hungry. That should take care of it! Communication!

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

When I drop kids off to be babysat in the evening I feed them before I leave. I just feel like it isn't a sitter's responsibility to feed them. Sure if a sitter comes over she can feed them...anyway are you sure they are not being fed before they get there and it has nothing to do with the quality of your food. :)

Okay just caught the you don't charge. Oh yeah! if I am not being charged I would feel like expecting food is asking too much of the person.

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M.A.

answers from Denver on

I think if I were you I would tell the other mom "Sure, I'm happy to watch your child while you're out. But I've noticed that X doesn't seem to eat much while s/he's here. If you want to send a little something for X's dinner/snack I think that would be great."
That way they could send whatever they want AND if the other parents have the same rules as you (eat what you're given) they'll be able to tell you and you can enforce it at your house.
I have TOTALLY worried about this when my boy starts bringing home friends from school.... In other words, I haven't actually had to do it yet! :D
Good luck!

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