I love asking questions on here cause I always get such wonderful and different points of views...
Before I had kids and throughout my pregnancy with my first I was always so busy and always on the go. Looking back I didn't have a lot of friends but I guess I never noticed cause I was always around people at work, and on the weekends I had things to get done, my hubby, family, and outings with friends sometimes. After I had my son I became a SAHM and felt so lonely at home all day by myself. Now I have two kiddos oldest is 3, I work a few hours a week, part of playgroup, have pets, but I still can't shake the feelings of loneliness. I have a lot to do and really enjoy being with my kids all the time, we go somewhere several times a week like a park. I guess I am just sad that I'll get back to that place of being stuck at home all day feeling lonely especially if I have more kids (which I really want) I don't feel depressed, I just want to know how to get over this weird hang up I have. Re-reading this it sounds odd and I realize that I guess I am just having a hard time putting how I feel into words.
I work outside the home and am crazy busy with taking kids to all kinds of events, but guess what? I have the same problem you do. I don't get any ME time and get lonely. It has made me wonder what will happen when my kids fly the nest! I've realized I need to focus on making my own friendships and nurturing them so I won't become a basket case in 10 years!
i really understand where you are coming from. I paint, walls and murals and artwork, and toenails, lol, i scrapbook, i garden, i make recipes, lots and lots of recipes (my current fave, homemade crackers hummus, yogurt popsicles and chocolate) ive started learning to tile, and strip down wood to stain it. i rollerblade with a racing stroller, i ride a bike, i do pilates, yoga, i recently took up paper mache and am making my own flower hair clips, berets and headbands,,,,,etc... but still feeling lonely even though i am never alone. You know who i think it is we miss?....and i really dont mean to sound corny....but i think its ourselves, a little part of us died and even though it was replaced with something more fulfilling and wonderful we still mourn what once was.
Mom,
Do you have friends with young children too? I would plan to get together with them a few times a week with them while your kids play just to talk and hang out. You meet at one of your homes or at the park, pool etc. you may even want to consider starting a even a neighborhood toddler playgroup once school starts bk for the older kids. If there is not one in your neighborhood you can set onewith other Moms in your area. Just call or go over and introduce yourself to mothers in your neighborhood with children your children's. Meet weekly, have each child bring a few toys to play with and share. the host provides a light snack/drink for the kids that week. Hold it in an area where the kids can have fun like your family room or a playroom and let them pay for a few hrs with Moms to supervise and also talk. My child is a teen now, I but I can fully relate because I have felt this way in the past when I was going between job or going bk to school and working only a little out of the home. It can be hard to adjust to not having adults around to talk with, you and the other Moms will have a lot in common. If you are a church goer maybe even your church can provide a community room or hall where the kids can play and Moms just socialize each week for a few hrs. Hope these ideas help.
You do not sound wierd. Not at all. As a SAHM, I feel totally isolated from other people. From the responses, many of us moms feel this way. The more I have to do, the more alone I feel. Don't have any advice, just letting you know other moms are feeling the same way. I think the mom who said it may be a since of lossof self is on to something.
I think you need more "away" time.
Although Im busy trying to rent out my house, entertain kids, go to the gym and do playdates and find things to do I am too very lonely and stressed out. I have 2 kids one is 3 other is too. I sat back and ponders as to why I still feel so down even though things are going well. Im goign to start school soon too but I have that feeling i will get to lonely even more. I dont call it depression I really think I miss not having so much responsibility and actually having a day off to do the things I WANT TO DO! Without having to compromise/fit in kids/husband ect ect. I think you need it too, day away from "the grind". Its funny how one night out alone can change your whole mood.
Like before kids we tried to escape work as much as possible, now we are trying to escape family lol God Love them but we need our needs tended too as well. It be nice if someone cleaned my house, did my laundy, took care of the kids and let me off the hook for a day.
As mothers that only applies to the very lucky ones. Kids tie you down so much you dont even realize it. Just know you are not alone and start getting out more. For both our sakes, i havent had a day off in 4 years!
