What a Teacher Told My Son

I agree with you, no matter what the problem is a teacher should NEVER use words like that to a child.
I would definitely bring this up, I would email that teacher and the principal. I wouldn't let it just slide though.
Thats unacceptable that anyone ( and a teacher !? )would talk to a child like that.

I am a teacher and would never say that to a student. That being said... it would be a good idea to contact that teacher and talk about it. Even over e-mail, it is a good idea to get both sides of the story. I'm surprised that a teacher your son doesn't interact with regularly would have anything negative to say about someone else's student. You should bring it up with his teacher also so that s/he is aware of what is happening. As a teacher, if I don't know it's happening, I can't deal with it!! I found out about stuff, sometimes 3rd or 4th hand, but I always welcome parents to let me know what they've heard so that TOGETHER we can get to the bottom of it. I'm not implying that your son isn't telling the truth, but I would dig deeper if I were you. Just my opinion.

When I was in 7th grade, my homeroom teacher hated me...don't know why. She also taught us several other subjects so a large part of the day was with her. She made us sit by alphabetical order, which put me directly in front of her desk, even though I was the tallest kid in the class. I was also a straight A student, quiet, never gave anyone any trouble. While she never said anything directly to me, she would make comments that were clearly directed at me...I was the only kid in the class with acne (both of my parents had terrible acne as teens) and she told the class that if you wash your face, you will never get acne (she was the science teacher too). We got book orders one day and she listed exactly the books I had ordered (typical 7th grade books) and said "why would anyone order these books? They are so STUPID"...stuff like that--she clearly intended for me to know she was talking about me and wanted me to feed bad. I still don't know what her issue with me was. We did have an IQ test that year...maybe I scored higher than her or something, but I certainly never flaunted my score or talked about it. I never complained about it to my parents or anyone, and luckily I had a strong enough self-esteem that it didn't mess me up, but I remember those comments to this day...can't remember much else about grade school. It's good that he's talking to you about it and you'll get a meeting to clear it up...if nothing else comes of that meeting, at least it will let the teacher know you won't tolerate it.

Good for you for confronting this issue head-on! I agree that it could have been a misunderstanding, but you can't fix it if you don't find out what happened. That being said, if this teacher was making enough negative comments for you son to avoid her, that needs to STOP. Even if he misinterpreted her comments, too, that can affect his self-esteem. Even if all of this was unintentional, she needs to know how it was interpreted and be more careful in the future.
I had a bully for a math teacher in 7th grade. He demeaned all the girls in the class, calling us stupid and asking why we even bothered to TRY learn something HARD like math. He degraded every girl that ever asked a question, and praised the boys for asking even simple questions that they could have figured out by looking at the book. I got a knot in my stomach every single day before going to that class, and it was the first, and LAST, B I ever made in school. It really created a mental block for me, and to this day, I HATE math! When my son asks for help with his math homework, I still picture that bully!
I hope this can get resolved quickly, so it doesn't have a lasting negative impact!! Good luck in your meeting!!

Just today in national news a teacher in North Carolina is being called out for writting LOSER on a 6th graders test paper. Apparently this began in the fall, the mother complained and the comments stopped. But just the other day her daughter got a test paper back with 20% deduction for being a loser. The teacher claims he is just speaking the lingo the kids use to motivate them. Motivate them? Since this is not your sons direct teacher I would speak to your son to get the exact facts again, and then speak with the principle. If it was his teacher than I would speak with his teacher, but since she isn't you don't have a relationship with her so her boss, aka, principal should be spoken to. How rotten this is. Congrats on having an honor roll son, you don't want this negative behavior from this teacher to affect his grades and it could if she continues and it affects his self esteem.

This is bullying & shouldn't be taken lightly, good for you for standing up & giving your son a voice to a teacher who is suppose to be protecting him at school......look at that mother that was pretending to be a young boy on myspace & demeaning a young girl & she ended up committing suicide over it........

I agree with you. They should not use those words. Sometimes teachers are rather unpleasant people themselves as they are human. I remember one teacher who picked on my son the moment he stepped foot into first grade. Not a good beginning. She actually looked like him and to this day I think perhaps he must have reminded her of her brother or something.
I currently work with a teacher who has her mouth going all the time. Her relative was at school once and she swore constantly (the teacher) I guess just to impress her. It is terrible but it happens. And unfortunately for some reason when it comes to keeping people like that they seem to win-I guess if they are loud and nasty people think they are confidant. I am sorry your son went through that. There are a lot of wonderful caring people in schools and education and he really should stear clear of this particular person.She was way out of line.You could report this, or complain only I have done those things and it seems like it is more aggravation than worth it. And then on top of it they couldn't stand either!!

I would contact the teacher first via email. CC the principal and you son's teacher. If she doesn't respond or you are not happy with her response, contact the principal directly.

Did he say 'Disgust' or 'Discussed' ? Sounds the same. Meanings are different. Teachers talk about students all the time. Some talk is positive and some is not. Certainly have a meeting and clear things up.

I know that you already have a meeting with the principal, which is great, but I just wanted to reiterate what Kelly was saying. I am also a teacher (semi retired) and sometimes what really happens doesn't get translated correctly to the parents. I encountered many instances where a child told their parents something that just wasn't quite right, and not because they were "lying" or trying to get anyone in trouble, it was just misunderstood. So I guess I'm saying you absolutely should find out what happened, because if that is what she said, it's not okay, but maybe there was a misunderstanding. So please don't go into the meeting defensively. Just go in with an open mind hoping to find out what really happened.

I would talk to that teacher and ask her 'her side' of the story. There is no excuse for someone in the education field to speak to ANY student that way.

I agree that was not nice to say that to a child, but at the time did she use it because of his behavior? Teachers can have plenty on their plate some days, although I'm not excusing her for harsh words, but is it possible she was having a bad day? I'm assuming since he had detention his behavior was not according to expectation of all the teachers at the function. Highly intelligent kids get bored and they make act out because they are bored. Teachers should keep him challenged as much as possible. Unfortunately, things like that can happen. If he feels like he may get into trouble, he can ask teachers if he can help them some way.......you'd be surprise what teachers can come up with. There are so many things to do.

You should go to the principal and have a conference with her/him and the teacher.

I would consider context in this instance--the point of Fear Factor (the show, anyway) is to disgust people! Perhaps the teacher was just getting into the spirit of the day? In my experience, little boys are thrilled by the opportunity to disgust an adult. On a different day, yes it would be inappropriate, but on this day, maybe it was actually intentional and meant as part of the fun.

I would go to the principal and have a chat with them both! Good Luck !