Okay mama's. I'm a step mother and we only have the kids on a limited basis. Recently we heard them up at 4 a.m. (they are two young kids - under age 7). They were whispering and then got quiet . My husband got up about 15 -20 min. later and said they were asleep on the couch. So, we left them there and went back to sleep. Well, I asked the youngest why they were up at 4 a.m. during breakfast and the answer was that she wet the bed but was all dry now. So, we didn't make a big deal about it but checked it out and the bed did smell. My question though is why didn't she get me or my husband up? She always says she wants to live with us and says she misses me. So, she's not scared of me. And, I've never made a big deal of her wetting the bed. The most we do is have them go potty before night night so there won't be accidents. But, when there are, I wash the sheets. I have rubber covers on both beds. Why would they both get up and she go to sleep in wet clothes? I always woke my mother up when it happened to me.
To the response that may be what they do at their mother's house. That's what I'm afraid is happening. I will say nothing negative about the mother, but I guess I forgot the question: What do you mama's do when your child wets the bed? Tell them to go back to sleep and not bother you or change everything in the middle of the night? My mom and grandma always changed everything in the middle of the night. Thanks mama's - She will be back for Christmas break and I'll try to find the right time to mention it. I don't want to embarass her but I don't want her in pee clothing either!
My son never wakes me. He changes himself and goes back to bed, although he doesn't drench the bed. She may be afraid that you won't have her come back, and you don't know what her parents' reaction is to her wetting the bed.
My daughter is always afraid I'll be mad at her, and I have told her repeatedly that she can't help it if she wets the bed when she is asleep. It only happens when she is going through a growth spurt. She gets up, goes to the bathroom, changes her clothes, and gets in bed with me. I change her bed in the morning, and she knows intellectually that I'm not upset with her, I tell her I am not upset with her, and yet she still is very hesitant and tentative when she tells me she wet her bed. I think children are so strict with their view of the world, they can't always forgive themselves for minor incidents like wetting the bed, and can't see how a grownup can forgive them either.
They are just scared even if you're nice about it.
It's normal.
I would not make a big deal about it (that will only make it worse).
Just let them know that you have no problem having them wake you up so their dad or you, can get them dry comfy pj's & sheets.
Keep having them pee right before bed, tell them not to worry, be loving & supportive and things will possibly be different next time
I know even w/me being an adult, I hate waking people up from a sleep.
I have always cleaned up. I will change my daughter out of wet clothes and change the bed sheets. I don't think any child should go back to sleep in wet clothes or a bed.
I would let the kids know to wake you or your husband to help them clean up. Not that they are bad, but that you don't want them to have to sleep that way.
This summer my step daughter was visiting and she had her period leak onto the sheets and bedspread. She was afraid to tell me about it since her bio-mom got mad at her for it at home. I let her know that it happens to all women at some point and to not be afraid to tell me or ask for my help cleaning up.
Maybe that's just what they do at their mother's house. I would simply tell them "oh, next time you wet the bed, come get your dad or I and we'll help you." I don't think you need to stress out about it.
I dont have step kids, so this is all new to me... but just wondering how long have you had this arrangement... your step kids may not be scared of you, as you say -- but they may not want to stir the pot, they may be scared to upset anyone -- scared of disappointing you or their dad... expecially if its a new situation. Scared that if they disappoint, they may be abandoned/rejected.... dont we try to put our best foot forward in any new relationship? Maybe talking about and having a dialog with the kids in addition to not making a big deal of the situation... Just my 2 cents.... hope it gets better...
I might calmly ask them why. I would reassure them that it is OK to wake you up, and that you know that wetting the bed is something they can't help.
They wear pull ups so it's not an issue. I choose to not have all that extra laundry every day. My time is worth something and doing laundry and using up so much of my money on extra water, laundry detergent, fabric softener, dryer sheets, gas for the dryer, etc...with blankets and sheets it is always at least 2 extra loads every day so no way am I getting that.
Pull ups are way cheaper that using all my time plus raising my bills so much.
When my kids were potty training and wet the bed, I would make up the bed with 3 layers: waterproof pad (or incontinence pad you can throw away) then a fitted sheet, waterproof pad, fitted sheet, sometimes up to 3 layers. That way at night you can tear off one layer and have a dry bed. Maybe have her help or watch you make up the bed this way, and let her know she can wake you up to help strip one layer to make a nice clean warm bed again.
"step" has nothing to do with it, don't put THAT on yourself :). Mine hide it from me too sometimes. Embarrassed. They are disappointed in themselves. I have put out extra clothes so my 4 year old can change if need be...he knows to throw the wet or damp clothes in the tub or sink so I can take care of it...then I know I need to tend to the sheets too :) Sometimes it is a near miss in the bathroom so the bed is OK.
