So my hubbys couzin will b getting married&i loved this white dress that i saw.. i have gotten different opinions about wearing white or not some say dont.. some say do lol... the dress has a black stripe above the waist and in one arm.. this wedding is a cristian wedding she will b wearing an ivory dress.. so what do u think? Would it look bad if i do wear a white dress?...
Even though I am only 34 I guess I have the 'Old School' way of thinking on this matter...it has came up a few times on this site over the last couple years and regardless of how things *might* be changing it is my opinion that it is VERY RUDE to EVER wear white to a wedding unless you are THE BRIDE!
.....Even if it has some black in it......!
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R.J.
answers from
Seattle
on
Completely off limits.
2 black accents on the waist and arm aren't enough to qualify as a "black and white" dress. ((Any combo of white and another color when it's 1/3 - 1/2 the other color are fine, just not not not when white is the primary color!!!))
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K.M.
answers from
Chicago
on
Are you the bride? If the answer is no you do not wear a predominatly white dress to a wedding, you can wear a black or other colored dress with white detailing - it is just rude. I do not care what trends are now, it is just rude.
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J.W.
answers from
St. Louis
on
Yes.
I think it is the last remaining no no color for a wedding. Find a different dress.
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K.L.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Do NOT wear a white dress to anyone's wedding but your own!!
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T.S.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Uhhhh... no... sorry.
If you love the dress, save it for something else. Just don't wear it to a wedding :)
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J.B.
answers from
Boston
on
Wow...a unanimous response! I think that's a first here. And I agree with other. You DO NOT wear white to anyone's wedding but your own. And question the judgment of anyone who told you it was OK. Because it's not.
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C.W.
answers from
Phoenix
on
White is off limits......I would choose a different dress
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X.O.
answers from
Chicago
on
Ya know, there are some traditions that have fallen by the wayside, but I really don't think that this is one of them. The rule is still no white at weddings.
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S.H.
answers from
St. Louis
on
my vote is "no".
you have a rainbow of colors to choose from, including black.
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B..
answers from
Dallas
on
I don't think you should wear white to a wedding, unless you are the bride.
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B.C.
answers from
Norfolk
on
If you're Pippa Middleton, and your sister says you can - you can get away with it - but rules for royals don't apply to the rest of us.
Find a nice pastel/floral dress and you'll be fine.
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E.T.
answers from
Albuquerque
on
White is just about the only color that you really can't wear to a wedding (well, ivory would be bad too). Sorry, but I just wouldn't do it if I were you.
You'll look like you're trying to be the bride, or look like the bride... and you'll be embarrassed.
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C.M.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I would never wear a white dress to a wedding. I would keep looking if I were you. Sorry
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V.C.
answers from
Dallas
on
Yes, that would be a breach of etiquette, as would doing anything that would draw attention away from the bride.
If you really like the dress and have other places to wear, get it for that and another dress for the wedding.
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R.M.
answers from
Cumberland
on
It will not only look bad-it will be bad.
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B.B.
answers from
Missoula
on
Choose something else for the wedding. White is only appropriate for the bride.
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C.S.
answers from
Kansas City
on
Don't do it. It will definitely look bad. I wouldn't wear white or anything close to it to a wedding unless the bridal couple requested it.
ETA after reading other responses: My husband was in a wedding back in August where the bride's SIL, who was not in the wedding, wore an off-white formal dress that looked very much like a wedding dress. I thought it was in poor taste AND she didn't even come close to looking half as gorgeous as the beautiful bride.
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G.B.
answers from
Oklahoma City
on
Ummm, no.
How would you have felt if some cousins wife wore a white dress to your wedding. Everyone would be looking at her and talking about her wearing white behind her back and that would have taken the attention away from you. Same will happen to you. You will be sitting there with everyone's eyes on you and they will be holding their hands over their mouths but you will know they are talking about your poor choice of attire for a wedding.
Find something else for the wedding and buy that dress for church or some other activity.
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K.G.
answers from
Boca Raton
on
I say do not wear white to someone's wedding :)
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L.D.
answers from
Dallas
on
Don't wear it. Definitely.
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K.B.
answers from
Tulsa
on
The one woman who did this was accused of trying to upstate the bride.
Don't be like her. It is the bride's day.
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M.T.
answers from
New York
on
Christian weddings are no different than Jewish or any other type. It's in bad taste to wear a white dress if you are not the bride. Choose something else.
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H.M.
answers from
Dallas
on
If you are not sure why don't you ask her if it's ok with her if you wear a white dress. Unless you don't feel comfortable asking. I don't see anything wrong with it as long as it does not look like a wedding dress or bridesmaid dress. Especially if she's wearing ivory.
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L.F.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Do NOT wear a white dress~! Don't compete with the bride--lol. She will not appreciate it. I would find another dress--good luck!
M
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L.R.
answers from
Washington DC
on
The dress may look great on you, but the one who's the focus of attention is the bride. If you wear white or even this dress that's mostly white, you will attract attention and be talked about -- and not in a positive way. If you want just to enjoy the wedding, and don't want to hear about your dress for years to come, don't wear this dress. Get it for other occasions but don't wear white to a wedding, even white with this little bit of black on it.
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A.L.
answers from
Charleston
on
Do NOT wear white. I don't care if it has black stripes on it or not. If you do, I'm afraid you run the risk of ticking off the bride and her family, which means trouble for you do the road with family functions. Find another color and keep the peace.
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M.S.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I could have cared less if people wore white to my wedding. In fact all of my bridesmaids wore white and the men had on black pants and white dinner jackets and all the children in the party wore white. We had a summer garden wedding. I was just happy to have everyone there to celebrate!
Ask the bride, or her mom for their thoughts.
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L.D.
answers from
Modesto
on
Please don't do anything that would even remotely have a chance of upstaging the bride. It is the only time in a girls life where she gets to be the the "center of attention" with everyones support. I'd like the courtesy extended to me, so I would extend this courtesy to others. I'm sure you can find somewhere else to wear the white dress and find a different one for the wedding.
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M.D.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Etiquette says only the bride should wear white/ivory. If thr bride was wearing a colored dress, then I think it would be ok, but since she isn't my vote is don't do it.
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A.G.
answers from
Mansfield
on
I think that "rule" applies to immediate family of the bride and groom (ever seen Monster-in-Law? hahaha). If you like it and it doesn't look prom/bridesmaid-ish wear it :)
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K.W.
answers from
Sacramento
on
if there is any question about it than I would always stay on the safe side and say don't wear it regardless of what color the bride is wearing.
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T.M.
answers from
Philadelphia
on
Please dont wear it. It is not nice to do to the bride.
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A.B.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I wouldn't. I also wouldn't wear white to a bridal shower, but that's just me. My friends think that's okay.
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M.C.
answers from
Washington DC
on
My future BILs girlfriend wore white to my Christmas time wedding. She pulled me aside a few days before and asked if it would be okay. I told her okay, just because 1. I knew she didn't have money for a dress, and 2. I knew she was trying to put a burr in the day, and wasn't going to give her that.
So she wore a white dress to my wedding. Its there forever in the family pics, even tho she is no longer part of the family....
I would ask what the bridesmaids are wearing. If the bridesmaids are wearing white or a variation, you may be able to wear it and not offend anyone. If they aren't, I would try and find something else, or add a wrap for the service/pictures.
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M.M.
answers from
Boston
on
I wouldn't. I still remember who wore white to my wedding 10 years ago.
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J.H.
answers from
Kansas City
on
I don't think it's appropriate...I know some will disagree. Also, why do something if you're questioning whether or not it would be offensive? When in question, heir on the side of caution. No need to potentially upset the bride.
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C.S.
answers from
Las Vegas
on
Since you are asking us you must be somewhat conscious that it would be awkward to say the least. Buy the dress and wear it somewhere else, find a different color for the wedding.
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C.N.
answers from
Baton Rouge
on
If it were my wedding, I wouldn't care if you wore white, black, plaid, or showed up naked. I invited people because I wanted them there, and didn't give a rat's arse what they wore.