Want to Leave Texas with My Daughter

Because of his spite, the only way he might agree to it would be to allow him to stop paying child support. To me, I would do this IF he severed all parental rights forever. Drastic, yes. Hurtful, yes. Has it been done? I know several women who did this and went on to marry better men.
I would NOT just move and fight it out. I would get an attorney and consider it part of protecting my child.

PS Document all visits(times, dates, what they did, who supervised her).

I knew a man at church who allowed his ex to move out of state, across the country. He didn't really want the kids, but he didn't want to look like scum so he blamed it on her husband being military.

Wow! Your story is so close to what I went through a few years ago-including that my hubby is a chiropractor lol. We live in Fl, and my hubby wanted to moved 3 hrs away for a job. We have residential custody of my daughter & my ex is very unstable but still was getting visitation. I did get an attorney b/c I felt our situation warranted it. My ex was served with an intent to move & of course he fought it. We never went to court, just mediation,& we finally decided that I could move but he had every other wknd, each Spring Break & 2 weeks in the summer. Of course, being an unstable person he lost his visitation twice! but thats another thing. My point is it doesnt have to make it to a judge court, but I would recommend a lawyer. Good luck!

WOW that is a tough one. Go talk to some kind of legal aid, or even get a free consult. I understand the ex who does nothing with your child, and new husband being the real dad. Prayfully this works out for you all.

I think it would be better to wait until after you are married. After the wedding call the Attorney General Child Support office and explain you need that part changed because he is moving his business to another state. They will know what needs to be done to change the decree. I don't think you need an attorney to petition the court for the change. I know 15 years ago I had a court order changed and all I did was call the child support office and talk to them. I never went before the judge, she just signed off on the changes.

Petition the court for your move, explain why, etc. My brother in law and his ex wife went through the same thing...she NOW lives in Texas, he in MN, but they both started out in Arizona. She got a petition to move because of her job. You may want to wait until you are actually married and then say look, my husband is a chiropractor and would like to move his practice. The courts would probably grant you a move, and it would just change the visitation schedule...right now, my brother in law gets summers, two weeks at Christmas, and spring break.

I know you are hoping to avoid costly legal fees, but custody issues are simply too complex and too case-specific to rely on information from non-experts. Please talk to an attorney so as to best protect your and your daughter's interests.

Nope. He has several options.

1) He can agree & keep visitation the same
- he pays
- you pay
- you both split the difference

2) He can agree & change visitation (like the one weekend a month, or all summer, or, or, or, or).

3) He can agree only if he gets primary custody

4) He can disagree and fight to keep you in state/ aka the courts will not 'allow' you to move with your daughter or be in breech of your agreement WITHOUT any change in custody

5) He can try to coerce you (I'll agree only if I don't have to pay child support, TOTALLY illegal, btw)

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First step... as always... speak with your attorney. They'll list any options I may have forgotten, and they'll give you a "timeline" (aka when to file/petition) that your local courts are most amenable to / would get you the best probability of you getting what you want.

My cousin's wife is currently dealing with this same situation and has been for several years. Her aggreement with her ex won't allow her to mover out of the Dallas area either, he does not pay child support and yet the judge still won't let her move. She married my couisn almost 4 years ago and they have been living apart this whole time because the ex won't agree and the judge won't make him pay support. She has cancer and can't work and she just had her home foreclosed on because she could not afford it due to his lack of paying child support . The judge actually lifted the support claus so the ex leaglly does not have to pay support. I don't think the your situation will change even if you get married unless your ex agrees to to it. My cousins wife actually had to take her case to the Govenor and the Atty General and are waiting on a decision from them as to what her options will be. I don't want to sound discouraging but this is also how your case could end up. Hopefully your ex won't put you through this but from how you discribe him he sounds just like her ex. I would seek legal advise, and follow the proper proceedure. Good luck to you.

1. Get married first. & do not give custody to the biological!
2. Prove that the move is in the best interest of the child. (due to it's all about the child. And be prepared to answer why the fiance can't work here.)
3. Documentation (visits missed, visits that occurred, late pickups, no shows, changes, treatment of child, how child feels about the visitations i.e. does the child act out like she doesn't want to go or comes home in a different than normal mood, is the child being fed, bathed etc.)
3a. the documentation will either prove that the order can be changed on the grounds of parental neglect, parental abandonment if the visits are rarely occuring, etc.
4. Petition the courts for an amended order & attorney general office.
or Get a form "Termination of Parental Rights" get the ex to go with you to a notary to sign it and offer him termination of child support if he gives up all rights. This way you can take it to the court and the order will be lifted.
OR
5. All else fails, can get costly but after getting married you and your husband file for a step-parent adoption with termination of parental rights of the biological.

Your goal is possible, you just have to be diligent about it and remember the main focus "in the best interest of the child".

It sounds like he just has someone else watch her when she's there and his girlfriend, who is #1, doesn't like her (kids)? Sounds bad that she even goes over there. Can you try and swing a lawyer and him not have visitation? It doesn't sounds like he is a healthy person for her to be around and with his #1 not wanting kids I wonder what goes on over there? Is she nice to her? Would she be nice to her if you flew her in and you weren't there? Are you going to have her fly alone? After you get married and if he is a really good guy and you feel he is a great dad to her, have him adopt her and it will take away dad's rights. That means no more child support (I assume he pays?) and dad has to sign off but he doesn't sound like he wants her anyways (no offense of course).

i'm only guessing, but i think that he can fight to keep her in the state without having primary custody. but, each state is different i think and like i said i am just guessing. maybe if he really doesnt have much of a relationship with her he may feel it is a relief....and i dont mean to sound nosy/rude/bad mannered, but if he is paying child support, and you can live without it, maybe suggest to him that if he goes along with an out of state move you wont ask for the child support???