Waking

My son began sleeping more sound once we taught him to soothe himself to sleep. We got him a security blanky (we travel a lot, so this helps because its portable). He will drag hat blanky all over the crib with him!

I used the techniques of "The Baby Whisperer". Its a more gentle way than the Ferber method. We allowed our son to fuss, but not actually cry. We soothed him by patting his back and "sshhhhhh". If he did start crying, we'd pick him up and rock him. As soon as he settled back down, we put him right back into the crib. It took about 1 week. The most important thing is picking up on baby cues, but also setting cues.

As soon as my son rubs his nose/eyes for the first time, its right into the room diaper change, and into the crib. At night, he gets a bath (every other night or so), diaper change, pjs, bottle and bed.

Cody goes to bed between 7:30 and 8:00 (even if we are out, he is ready for bed at that time and will go to sleep). He sleeps until 6 or 7. Our "rule" is that if he wakes before 5:30, he doesn't get a bottle. If its after 5:30, he gets his bottle.

My husband is military too and I have 6 kids. I sleep with the baby. It is easier than getting up and down in the night so I get more sleep which is so important when you are the only parent on duty. When she goes to sleep at night then i just watch TV in my room, read a book, or do paper work. If you want info. on safe co-sleeping go to Dr. Sears web site or Dr. Jay Gordon's

Hi J.,

Have you tried raising her up a bit in her crib? Laying flat may be what's making her unhappy. I have 3 year old twins and we had this same issue with my son. We took a regular pillow and put it under his mattress so that it was slightly raised and that really seemed to help him a lot. He started sleeping better. our doctor had told us that while he did not have reflux he may have been experiencing some form of it when we laid him flat on his back. Once he started rolling over on his own he'd sleep on his stomach and that also helped. The baby stores also sell this special pillows for babies that keep them raised up as well. We got some from Babies R Us.

Good luck, I promise it does get better!

H. C

My daughter did the same thing around 5 1/2 months. She had been sleeping 11-12 hours straight, and then all of a sudden started night waking... the worst was when she woke up 14 times in one night! Sometimes she would be awake awhile, and other times, she would fall back asleep as soon as I picked her up. I looked in the books, and she had about every potential cause of night waking listed... her first cold, rolling over, teething, maybe separation anxiety (not sure).... it was really hard for a month or so, then she settled into waking up just once or twice at night. Me, being the first-time mom, thought at first that she was going through a growth spurt and needed the extra milk, so I nursed her, but realized later that I probably shouldn't have done that because it got her into the habit of waking to nurse in between her REM cycles. In the end, what cured it was checking on her every time she woke, but quickly leaving, and then checking back every 5 min. 'til she fell back asleep. It was hard the first night, but in three nights she was sleeping through the night again. Each night, you can lengthen the time, so check about every 10 min the second night, and every 15 min the third night, if needed. We ended up waiting until 9 months before doing that, but I wish we had known to try it sooner! Good luck, and hang in there. Know that this phase will seem surprisingly short when you look back on it! :-) oh, and definitely try to put her down "drowsy, but awake" so that she can fall asleep on her own... it will help!

I was sleep deprived until my son turned 6 years old and we had our daughter. When she turned 22 months and both of them seemed to want parenting 24-hours a day, I had enough. I yelled at everyone to leave me alone and I stormed off to my bedroom and went to sleep, daring anyone to wake me. Since then, no one has disturbed my sleep again unless they are ill. It is a miracle I still have my sanity (I think), and I still love my family. I would rule out any digestive issues that can cause sleep problems. My son, when he was a baby, had a difficult time with gas, which contributed to crankiness. He also had chronic ear infections, allergies and asthma (later diagnoses). If you've ever had sinus problems, you can imagine how uncomfortable bedtime can be, so we learned to elevate his bed. When he was 3, we got the bright idea to get him a bunk bed, which he loved. It wasn't until he turned 10 that he was able to articulate that the bottom bunk was very uncomfortable. Probably hated the idea of sleeping with something over his head. So, we told him to sleep on top bunk, we added humidifier and he's had a much better sleep since then. So, you've put a flannel blanket in and one of your own t-shirts? Make sure she's not allergic to flannel or the detergent you are using. Also, have you tried swaddling her? I can't remember the name of the wrap method, but basically, the baby feels like she's back in the womb, which is probably why she enjoys you holding her while she's sleeping. I never got the hang of it with my son, but when my daughter came along, I learned it quickly and it does work until baby is about a year old. You can find out more about that at www.aplaceofourown.org. And, if you are indeed sleep deprived, try taking naps when she naps in the daytime. I didn't do that as much with my son, because I continued working. When my daughter came along, I quit and learned to conserve my energy-not doing housework while she slept. And, I wish someone had explained to me that some degree of sleep deprivation is part of the mommy job description, particularly if Dad travels a lot with his job. See if you can enlist some help from family, if they are nearby, so that you can rest. If family is out of area, maybe one might be willing to visit you once per quarter or so to give you a break. Or hire a babysitter that can come at least twice per month and will babysit while you are home so you can rest a bit. You'll feel a lot better.

Have you started solids yet? I know there are so many studies out there that tell you not to start until babies are 6 months old, but our pediatrician said to begin at 4 months b/c my son was always hungry.

Once I increased his food intake and changed his schedule a bit (feeding him right before he went down for the night), he slept through the night.

Now, at 7 months, he takes anywhere from 2-3 naps during the day, depending upon his "activity" level, and he sleeps from 7:30 pm to about 7 am.

Adding solids (he is also eating pureed "real" food, for lack of a better word) has worked wonders. Ask your pediatrician b/c they are all guided by such different philosophies, but I swear this was the answer for us!

Hi J.,

I guess I didn't exactly pick up on if she's awake or asleep when you lay her down. If she's asleep, then what you need to do is get her to the point where she's got a full tummy, a clean diaper and is sleepy, then lay her down. It's jarring for them to wake up in their crib when the last thing they remember is being snuggled in mommy's arms. Most babies wake up a lot, but they only get half way awake then fall back asleep. Your daughter is probably doing this except when she's half way awake, she notices that she's not where she remembers and this stresses her out.

The best thing you can do is to put her down while she's awake but sleepy. Some would say then leave the room, but I stayed with my boys, just reading in a chair or something so they knew that it was ok. Babies take their cues from mommy, so just be where she can see you but don't look at her. Just be calmly occupied with something quiet and maybe glance at her every once in a while so she knows you're still watching over her. She should drift off into a deep sleep from there.

Hope this helps.

Hi J.. My daughter is now 9 months old but I remember she started to do the same thing around 5 months old. I think it just an age where they really start to take leaps in development so they want to stay with you as long as possible. What my husband and I decided to do and it worked for us was, we she would wake up we would just listen to her fuss for a bit. We got to know, "I'm fussing because I want you to come in and hold me", and then the "I'm fussing because I'm hungry, uncomfortable, hurt, messy, etc" cries. If it was just the "come here and pay attention to me cry" we let it go. This wasn't easy because I never wanted her to feel like I abandoned her. But she started to fall asleep easier and easier every night that I didn't go in. I think she just needed to understand that is time to sleep and that she can put herself to sleep just fine. I also noticed that when I did hold her for awhile like you did, when I first put her back down she would wake up and cry, but if I just left her room quickly she would go back into a deep sleep with a few minutes of fussing. Hope this helps a bit!

I wouldn't try solids.

I would try backing her bed time up to 6 or 6:30. I'd also try a white noise CD. There's a great book called the No Cry Sleep Solution, if you are interested. Does she have a routine? How long is her routine? Is she nursed?

The very first response is wise.