Vow Renewal, Ceremony, Party Suggestions?

Updated on May 03, 2012
N.G. asks from Arlington, TX
13 answers

In July 2013, my husband and I will celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary. We chose not to have a wedding- I found the whole planning process overwhelming, and neither one of us felt compelled to make a big to-do about it. We went to the courthouse wearing flip-flops and t-shirts and tied the knot, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

However, ten years later, I am more in love with my husband that I have ever been. We were married young and although I know I loved him then, it's a different kind of love now. I am still not interested in ever having a huge ceremony, but I would like to somehow express with my husband how deeply committed to our marriage I am, in front of immediate family and very close friends.

I'd like to have a very VERY small vow-renewal ceremony at our church, either just the two of us and our kids, or surrounded by our children, parents, siblings and very close friends only. I can't decide. I don't want to spend a lot of money, and by that I mean less than $500-$700 dollars total. Having never planned a wedding or event of any kind, I'd like to get started soon so I have the whole year to plan (I get overwhelmed easily so more time will be my friend).

What suggestions do you have to make the day stress-free and memorable? I want very low-key, beautiful, something we will remember and cherish for a lifetime.

Thanks!

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

***grabs popcorn***

10 year anniversary?

vow renewal?

I sincerely hope you don't get attacked like another poster a few weeks ago. She got PMs calling her names.

Good luck!
ETA - found it....
http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/11407093206362554369

5 moms found this helpful

More Answers

J.H.

answers from San Antonio on

I'm glad you're getting more polite responses than I did. I had people telling me I was ridiculous for wanting a celebration for our 10th and to get over it. And as someone else said, I also got PMs calling me names.

Start by talking to your pastor and seeing how much it would cost to do the ceremony there. Some churches allow you to do it for free, others will charge you a fee. I would spend the majority of the money on the party/reception. Decide where you're going to have it, then decide what kind of food you want. Once you've decided what kind of food you want, then you can decide if you're going to "cater" yourself, or if you're going to hire someone to do it.

For a vow renewal you can send out e-vites. If you want to decorate, you can find flowers for cheap, or just do candles everywhere...or a combination of both.

If you have any questions, feel free to message me. Our vow renewal is in 5 1/2 weeks. I've done all of our planning.

*hugs*

3 moms found this helpful
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L.M.

answers from Dallas on

If you have nothing nice to say.... Come on people- she's not asking your opinion on whether "it is too soon!" Good grief!
Congratulations on your 10 years coming up! We will be celebrating 10 years this August and we want to do a small vow renewal too, also on a tight budget. We are looking into local bed and breakfasts that allow that sort of thing on their scenic grounds if you rent a room or two. We just want immediate family to be involved. I'm also looking into party boat rentals on a local lake because that would be fun for the kids... not sure yet but I don't feel too much pressure to plan since there is no set standard for what a vow renewal should be.

2 moms found this helpful
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H.M.

answers from Denver on

If you want I can send some pics from when we did our renewal. It was for our 11 year anniversary and we had our kids part of the ceremony and only had close friends attend (family in another state).

We had ours outside at a park with a gazebo on the water - it was very pretty. I wore my original wedding dress but had it altered so it looked more like a casual summer dress - my daughter (18 months at the time) also had a dress made from the material of my wedding dress - hubs and son both wore white polo's, khaki shorts (it was August) and we had a reception at the park in a pavillion - I ordered food and had it delivered. I think we spent about $1000 but it was worth it.

The kids had a FANTASTIC time playing (the pavillion was right next to a park) and the adults were able to chat, hang out and just enjoy the beautiful day.

Oh - we also had Gerber Daisies which I LOVE as our flower...it was very informal and absolutely perfect. :-)

1 mom found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I'm glad you asked this. My husband and I are the same and plan to do a vow renewal in October 2014.

I know we will do it in a church this time, but very small, close friends and family...or even just family.

Hubby and I will take an amazing vacation. That's all I know so far.

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J.T.

answers from New York on

Lake shore (if your pastor would do this out of the church) and then a restaurant?

If you have a nice yard, back yard barbecue? You could even have it catered so you have nothing to do but write a check and have fun....

Congrats on 10 years!

1 mom found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Have you checked into the fees at the church. Our church was 950 and my dad's was 1,200. That was just for the pastor and use of the church.

We got married last July, both me and my dad. I planned mine and I didn't think it was bad but I really didn't sweat a lot of details. I don't think I had a place for the reception till a month before the wedding, oops. Ours was small, fifty people, and it cost us around 4,000.

The problem we ran into is it grows. Ya know, well we did this we should do that. We weren't going to do a formal reception but it just grew out of everything else.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Talk to your pastor.
(LOTS of churches "charge" nothing--although customary to give officiant a gift of money--$100 for example).

Perhaps you can do it after a service on a Sunday, write your own vows and take everyone (close friends and family) to a nice brunch following. Have a small cake at the brunch?
Gonna be tight on $500-700.
IMO, 10 years is too soon for a vow renewal.
What about a fantabulous romantic vacation, sans kid(s), for the two of you? I'd prefer that.
We eloped--but I've never regretted it--not that you do--but we did have a small reception after.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I love what you said about your husband. How wonderful!
Congratulations!

What a fantastic idea.
You can have everything you want, have it be memorable, fancy-looking etc.....all on a budget. You just have to get creative.

-you can do it outside. Weather permitting (not too hot etc) at a park, or a friend's backyard
-do you have anyone in your family that is already orgained to perform
weddings? You can, also have someone you trust become ordained but you need to make sure they can handle the pressure of that moment.
-call your favorite inexpensive restaurant to see if they have dinner party trays to have delivered or have someone pick up
-then just add little white lights to any outdoor setting (like the kind you put on Christmas trees), hurricane lamps w/white candles inside, white table cloths to any kind of outdoor furniture, card table etc & voila
-have sodas, bottled water, alcoholic drinks if you imbibe
-have a friend or relative make you a cake
-p/u some local flowers for a bouquet or tulips/carnations to decorate outdoor space
-have some music from an iPod attached to speakers playing
-and you're done

You don't have to spend much. You just have to think outside the box

Have fun!

S.S.

answers from Dallas on

We were going to do the same this year since we eloped 5 years ago. I think the key will be a lot of do-it-yourself projects. I wouldn't make it very formal but tasteful. The idotaketwo website is a good help, I used it. You can also get some good ideas on theKnot.com.
Some of the local parks in Arlington are really nice and you can rent a gazebo or pavilion for the whole day for really cheap. And instead of a cake we were going to do a cupcake wedding cake and that's easy to do yourself. I agree about e-vites, as that will save a lot of money. And you can get a nice dress pretty inexpensive if you do research on the net.
Good luck and have fun! Don't let the process stress you out.

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

That's great that you want to celebrate your love. I would say doing it with family and close friends. Talk to your church and see if they will charge you to rent it. Some will some wont. If you can't do it at your church find someplace that you can do it. If you or someone in your family have a nice house that is big enough for you family and friends have it at their house. I knwo outside in TX in July will not be doable!!!!!!!!! Or find a resteraunt in the area that has a private dining room that you can use and move stuff around in. Any flowers do them yourself or have a friend that will do them as a gift for you. You live in Arlington so you are not too far from Traders Village that's where I bought most of my flowers for my wedding. They are so much cheeper out there. Then go to like Hobby Lobby or someplace like that for the other stuff you would need to make them. I did all the flowers for my wedding. It was lots of fun! Just find a nice dress unless you want a wedding type dress. If you want a wedding dress a lot of times David's bridale by the mall has some for like $99 thats what I paid for my sister in laws wedding dress at that store. If you have the kids in the wedding party just find them nice dresses if they are girls or slacks or dress shorts for boys. We probably spent the most money for our wedding on the candle abras and that tuxs. Well and cake. If you want a wedding cake just price them. I know Walmart even does some wedding cakes. Or if you have a friend that bakes see if they can do something. I know there are lots of classes at JoAnn's people can take adn one is for cake decorating. HOpe this helps!

Good luck and God Bless!!!!

T.K.

answers from Dallas on

http://www.idotaketwo.com/

I would invest my money more on the celebration than the ceremony. I would want the party to be the big deal and the service to be reverant and simple. At church, surrounded by the people that have been there to support and uplift your little family and your church mentors. Then move to a differant venue where you can let your hair down and really enjoy yourselves.

T.M.

answers from Redding on

Here in CA at Yosemite National Park there is a chapel that does "renewing of the vows" every year on the first Sunday of May, which is this coming Sunday for us. We have been to it a couple of times. It's a bunch of marrieds all listening and renewing at the same time, much cheaper than your option. I think it's 50 bucks a couple. We arent going this year cuz of some other plans we have, but it's really fun. You might check around your area to see if some place offers the same thing. The chapel here is right across from Bridal Veil Falls and it's so pretty. After the ceremony you are free to move about the park in one of America's most beautiful places ;)

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