Okay I am going to sound like a complete idiot but you just dumped ( for the lack of a better word) your son at some commune living? Or was it his choice to leave? ( I have no idea what a group home is but I will guess it’s like a borderline 1/2 way house..) I will also go as far as to guess not the best characters reside there.....he rather live there vs following what it sounds like unreasonable rules.. and being micromanage?! I bet he had a hell of a time in hs where his friends are using a computer and he is not allowed.
Wait..Is he special needs? Does he have any disorders or diseases? Was it ever diagnosed.. did you try medication?
I get limiting, I get earning, knowing the rules and being a tough parent. But I also see how electronics improve our lives..World moves forward not backwards. I get limiting gaming, computers etc. we have that at our house. You earn video gaming. Computer is used for educational purpose- it is in the kitchen so at no time are they alone with the computer. Hubby has an office and his computer has face recognition and or password that kids do not know.
And tv is full of educational programs. Travel, history, how things work and so on. And honestly if you reject electronic things but now you kinda back down..?!
But now you are going back on your rules and looking for “okay” games.. ?!? I think what is addictive to some obviously is not to others. Google or play the game .. I mean I have over 15 pages of games on my I phone. My kids play for few and move on. Now with this fortnight you need to be careful.. it’s engaging and has a ton of upgrades, new skins, evolving slings, back packs, gliders and etc. my kids are limited to 1 hour play time when school starts... if they have time between practice, games, homework and traveling with the team. Did you guys invest in your kids-sport, travel, outdoor activities, board games etc when your kids were little?
when kids were about 4 we did a ton of sports with them.. stopped at hockey and now they are traveling all over.. now 19 is obviously too late to start but maybe doing some activities with your son? Bowling, billiards, paintball even, traveling with him.. And reward him with what he likes?
Does he have plans of schooling ( I will guess he finished HS) college or trade school?
It’s just such a weird unhealthy situation. He doesn’t live in a loving and supporting home.. yet you still control him, yet you now want to back up on your word and rules.. he needs help yet he is not getting it from you., he is an adult and yet you treat him as a child. Weird.