Update to Weird Obsessions

I don't know about the obsessions, but my sister's kid is a little houdini and they had to install locks high on the doors to keep him from getting out. You might want to look into that.

R., please call a children's hospital and ask for an appointment with a developmental pediatrician. Have an evaluation done. I too am concerned that this is a sign of autism, and you need to ask for this to be ruled out.

Meanwhile, please install locks on exterior doors high up that he cannot reach. What happened that night is very scary.

Good luck,
Dawn

It's possible these are symptoms of autism. Autistic kids tend to fixate on certain things. Talk to your child's pediatrician about your concerns. Just the fact that he's putting himself in danger is a reason to check with a professional. If it is autism there are many resources available for help and the earlier it's diagnosed, the easier it is to treat.

I echo the recommendations to have your child evaluated. It could be nothing, but it's best to rule out any problems.

My son had similar obsessions and intensities when he was much younger. He was obsessed with signs that had symbols on them, particularly bathroom and handicapped parking signs. He always had to touch them when he saw them. He's had random obsessions with silverware, elbows, and numbers, especially the number 7. If we went to an amusement park ride that would number the cars, we would have to pray that we would get the number 7 or he'd throw a fit. He would instantly bond with random things. There was one day that he spent the entire time at the zoo clutching an unopened bag of microwave popcorn. And these were just the tip of the iceberg when it came to dealing with his issues.

We had him evaluated when he was 2 1/2, and he qualified for a range of services that were transferred to the school district when he turned 3. I don't know if it was all the early intervention or if he would have grown out of these behaviors on his own, but I am happy to say that he is now an awesome 6-year-old. He started to really turn a corner when he turned 4. By the time he started kindergarten, you would never have known there had been any problems. Sure, he can be a little more focused than his peers about the things that interest him (he knows more about Star Wars than almost anyone I know, including adults, despite never having seen any of the movies), but they are not debilitating obsessions anymore. He is so much more flexible than I ever dreamed he could be, and he's happy and healthy.

So there is hope. Don't let fear stop you from seeking help and don't feel like a discouraging evaluation is the end of the world if you get one. In the meantime, find ways to make his obsessions safer. Give him a small handheld flag (or several), so he doesn't have to worry about the ones outside. Discourage the thumb tacks. Replace them with those sticky hooks that you can remove if he wants to use them to hang his necklaces. And don't be afraid to impose limits. Find a room that is safe where he can't throw things around, and put him there when he has his tantrums.

Good luck. I know this is so tough. The years from when my son was 18 months until he was 4 were the longest years of my life. But it can get better.

If this is a real post:

Let him have the flags. Let him have the necklaces, as long as there isn't a danger of choking himself. Tell him he can't have the thumbtacks, they are dangerous for a three year old. Lock the doors so he can't go out in a snowstorm.

I would talk to a counselor. I would say small obsessions with toys or items are normal but when you talked about sneaking out and finding him in the snow going to find flags...and that they might be dead if they are not moving....? I think that the tacks are dangerous and you need to take them away. Period. Even if he cries or throws a tantrum. You need to really get ahold of this now. I would get some assistance now while he is young...
good luck, glad you are asking for help.

OCD?? Sounds like he has some obsessive tendencies. Lots of the people in my family have OCD, its good you are noticing now, I would suggest to take him to a behavioral therapist that specializes in OCD and obsessive behavior. Some attachment to things is normal at his age, but this sounds a little beyond that. If certain items, such as necklaces and tacks and flags are causing problems, maybe those things could be put away for awhile, in a tuperware and only gotten out occasionally.

Maybe keep a special necklace in the car, if he is good while you are out, he can play with it on the way home?? Also, I find it helpful to go over expectations with my dd right before we go somewhere. Maybe if you let him know before you go out that you wont be getting anything and if he can behave then he will get abc once you get home or at the end of the trip.

I agree with the other moms. This is a bit outside of the range of normal behavior for a 4yr old. Especially when you add on the violent tantrums - that is a bigger red flag than the obssessing. Get him evaluated