Unusual Nighttime Potty Training Problem

It's like this. Don't put the pull up on her until she's sat on the potty and made a deposit...lol.

Sit there with her until she eliminates the urine in her bladder.

Then straight to bed.

Then for the fun part.

Limiting fluids hinders night time stuff. She should get milk with dinner and later if she wants it.

Waking her up does absolutely nothing for her or for wetting the pullup. She is asleep. As soon as she wakes up she clinches that muscle and doesn't go. If she does it would only be a trickle.

Wake her up by taking her by the hand and straight to the toilet. Take the pullup off and sit her on the toilet. She can sit there asleep if she is slow to wake up.

11 hours is a super long time for a kid to not pee. She's not supposed to wake up to go pee. Her body is supposed to shut down the production of urine when she falls asleep. Unless she's been guzzling drinks for hours she should be able to sleep normal sleep hours in a couple of years.

She is doing what is normal for her age. The peeing in the pullup before laying down can be fixed right now, today. Just don't let her put it on and wear it around the house. Toilet until she pees all her urine out then straight to bed.

She goes to bed really early so I'd say she's going to continue peeing while she's asleep until she's old enough to sleep less hours.

I hope that you understand that peeing in the pull-up on purpose is just a SYMPTOM of what is really going on with your daughter. There are no long term ramifications of peeing in a pullup on purpose. There ARE, however, long term ramifications of not dealing with whatever is going on with your daughter that is causing her to need this kind of control that she resorts to wetting herself on purpose.

figure THAT out and you will have helped your daughter.

You don't appear to be coming at the situation from that angle.... the one where your goal is to *help* your daughter. So, I would start there. Forget about the cost of the pullups (I know it's hard... they are expensive) and figure out what is really going on that would make her behave that way. Is she feeling out of control? Is she angry about something?

If you've ruled out medical issues (or won't rule them out until she's 6) and she is fully potty trained during the day, that indicates there is something mentally/emotionally/socially going on.

If you come at her from a place of "I won't stand for...." she is going to learn negative attention is what mommy is about. Instead, have her help you clean up. Have her help you change sheets. Have her help you do laundry to clean her clothes if they get wet.
She may be wanting attention. 3 kids and working full time means there is not a lot of individual attention for the middle kid. Older sibling is doing new things first (because they are oldest). Baby sibling still needs mom and dad's help because they are still a baby. What does middle kid get? NOTHING - probably in her mind.

So - change it around so that the time she gets from you is positive and see if that helps.

Good luck.

I would have her use the toilet at night, JUST before she goes to bed, and then the pull up is the last thing she puts on before climbing in. Don't give her the opportunity to play or anything else. Pull ups are for nighttime. Period. I would explain to her that a full pull up can cause her to have skin rashes and infections and it is not good to use it instead of using the toilet when she is awake. I would make sure there is a night light on the path to the toilet and in the bathroom and praise her when she gets up to pee on her own. And then I would mostly ignore it. I tell my DD to get up and change. She does it herself, no cajoling from me. I simply tell her that a pull up with pee in it gives her a rash, she needs to get out of it and didn't let her to anything else with her morning (no breakfast, no playing, no tv) til that was done and it became a habit.

I would also find ways to praise her for being a big girl, that have nothing to do with this issue. And when she is dry, give her praise.

Since she is wetting the bed without pullups, they are not the problem. Start putting them on at the last minute right before bed and taking them off in the am as soon as she gets up. Then stop worrying, you can't control what she does in between.

Not allowing her milk at dinner or any liquids after is not healthy. She needs to have liquids in her to avoid dehydration. You also can see that it has not changed her night time wetting, so you can drop that tactic.

Waking her up has not helped either, so let her sleep.

As far as the cost of pullups, it is not cheaper to do more laundry and give an extra bath in the morning when you have a wet bed every morning. Look for coupons and sales to get the best price on pullups. Relax mom, she will grow up in her own time. In the meantime, be grateful that she sleeps 11 hours straight.

Our son wore pullups at night till he was 7 1/2.
He slept very deeply.
When he woke up dry every morning for 2 weeks straight we were finally finished with them.
He had a very few accidents from time to time - you keep the water proof pad on the bed for a long time.
I agree about putting the pullup on your daughter right before she gets into bed and after she's used the bathroom.
Waking them up in the night just exhausts everyone and doesn't help her bladder mature any faster than it already is.
Some of our sons friends wet the bed till they were 11 or 12 yrs old and our pediatrician said it was very common.
She won't be going off to college and still be wetting the bed, so try to relax a bit.
It might take longer than you think but you both will get through this eventually.

My 4 year old still wheres pullups at night and, while they are not cheap, I will not even consider not putting him in a pullups until I'm sure he can stay dry all not. Not doing special sheets or water proof mattress cover or alarms. Nothing!

I know that my son will pee in his pullups after he wakes up on the weekends because I haven't always told him he must get dressed, even if we aren't going anywhere. I have not noticed him do this on school days.

Do you think it might help if you focus on streamlining the bedtime routine? When does she put on then pullups? Is it before you read books and brush teeth? I was just thinking, that might be the place to start to work on this concern you have. Maybe you put her in the pullups at the very last minute before she climbs into bed. Also, just before that you could have everyone use the potty one last time. Do you think that might help with the peeing in the pullups before bed?

As I said, I know our 4 year old does this after he wakes on the weekends, but he does not do it before bed. In fact, he will climb out of bed (especially if I've already turned the lights off and said goodnight) and say, "I gotta pee!" and run to the bathroom.

Personally, I do not cut off liquids. I like having a glass of water by my bed at night. There are times I wake up thirsty and really want a drink. I will not cut of liquids after a certain time, and my kids do have drinks with them in bed (water bottles that "should" not leak).

Good luck! This does sound like a pain in the butt!

I agree with most of the previous responses. Don't limit liquids and stop waking her up, those things don't work. Put the pull-up on last thing, and take it off first thing in the morning. My daughter wet the bed, less and less frequently, until she was 9. Praise her if she's dry and reassure her that this is normal and she will grow out of it. It is not unusual.

Make sure that the last thing she does before going to sleep is pee, then put on the pull up. At least that way, you'll know she doesn't need to pee in it before falling asleep. Don't wake her when you go to bed, but just check on her and see if the pull up is wet yet or not. If you (or your husband) wake up before her in the morning, check again to see if she's wet or dry. If she's wet at either check, you'll know it's not intentional.

What do you say to her about the intentional peeing? Do you talk to her calmly and explain why that's not acceptable? Make sure you're listening to her too so you can try to understand why she's doing it.

I agree with some others that you don't need to limit her drinks in the evening. Peeing at night has very little to do with how much you actually drink and is much more just related to your body and the signals it does (or doesn't) send to your brain.

get one of those alarms. A friend just used it with her 5.5 year old and it took a few days.

My son was five and wetting every night. After having to change the bed twice in one night (while he wore pull-ups, but soaked through them), I finally bought a pee alarm. It attached to his underwear and would alarm and vibrate at the slightest bit of wetness. Turns out he was peeing up to six times while he was sleeping. He was such a heavy sleeper, he just didn't wake up when he had to pee. It took 3-4 months,(instructions said most kids train within two weeks) but he did learn to wake up when he needed to use the bathroom.

Set alarms at regular intervals to make sure she gets up and uses the bathroom.

I second the suggestion to delay putting the pull up on her until just before she climbs into the sheets and have her go one more trip to the potty just before that. The very last thing before she goes to bed.

I always let my kids have a small cup (less than half full) on the bedside table during the night, in case they woke up thirsty.

Some kids are not reliably dry at night for a very long time. But I would imagine that at almost 6, she should be having a few nights here or there where she is dry. At least occasionally. Do you celebrate those times with her? Even though peeing when asleep is beyond her control, you now know that she also pees in them when awake. So, celebrate ANY dry nights. Clap and smile and cheer her. (no need for gifts or toys or treats).

Finally, realize that she is sleeping a LONG time.
If it is possible, try getting her up just before she would normally wake, and get her into the bathroom to potty first thing, before she has a chance to lounge in bed and pee in the pull up. You know she wakes around 6:30, so wake her up at 6:25 instead, and walk her to the bathroom.