Trying to Get My Son on a Nap schedule...any Good Advice?

Updated on November 11, 2008
R.F. asks from Keller, TX
24 answers

My son is about to turn 3 months old and I am working towards getting him on a consistent nap schedule. Right now, one day he takes a couple good naps( hour or more)then the next day he will have only a couple 20-30 minute naps. Now, if I put him in his car seat, take him on a walk or put him in the swing he goes to sleep, but the crib is another story. I am concerned he is not going to be a good napper and I want to establish good sleep habits with him early. The days he does not nap well shows greatly in the evenings. He is fussy and hard to get to bed. When he does nap good he goes to bed great. I can just lay him down in his crib and he goes to sleep. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated?

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So What Happened?

Thank you so much for all your advice and encouragement. I do think I am strssing too much on this schedule thing. I will work on it gradually and let him tell me when he is ready. Thanks again!

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C.G.

answers from Dallas on

I second the Babywise book. He is not to young to develop a sleeping and eating habit. I swear by this book with both of mine. My first is 4.5 and still says I am ready for my nap now and my second is on schedule, they are like clockwork. You have to get it.

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R.A.

answers from Dallas on

My pedi told me no nap schedule until he is 6 mos old. Like clock work when my little boy was 6 mos old he was on a schedule. Hang in there....

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A.N.

answers from Dallas on

I swear by Babywise. It's a controversial book but man does it work. My dd is so well developed and takes naps and goes to bed at night w/ no fuss whatsoever and I give full credit to the things that I learned by reading Babywise.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

Get the book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It will answer all of your napping questions. You can check it out at the library (which is what I did at first) but I can guarantee you will want your own copy!
Good luck,
A.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

I have a 7 month old little girl, and her nap schedule changes all the time. While I was on maternity leave for 2 mos. she had no nap schedule. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't get her on one. She has been in daycare since she was 2 mos. old and has yet to have a consistent nap schedule. She may have the same schedule for a week then all of the sudden it changes. She's just not a good sleeper all the way around. Now my son was a great napper. He was like clock work and I didn't go back to work with him until he was 10 mos. old. He slept through the night from 2 mos. on..took consistent naps and still does. I think every kid is different. Don't force a schedule on them, because you might just be fighting your self. You can try to get somewhat of a schedule down, but be prepared for it to change.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.L.

answers from Dallas on

What I did that worked well with both of my boys (now 5 1/2 months and 2 1/2 years) is focused on getting on a regular eating schedule first. At 3 months, they typically nursed at 7:30AMish, 10:30AMish, 1:30PMish, 5PMish, and 8:30PMish. Both of my boys started sleeping through the night between 3 and 4 months. Once I had decided on a good base feeding schedule (basically a goal, I fed earlier if they seemed really hungry or sometimes a little later if they were napping--but I did wake them up each morning by 7:30 if they were still sleeping and I did wake them up from naps if it was meal time.), then I focused on getting them on an eat, awake, sleep schedule. Combining the feeding schedule with this order of events naturally lead to a nap schedule. For morning nap (usually around 9AM) and afternoon nap (usually around 2PM), I put them in their cribs with the same night time routine (feed, stories, music) that we used at bedtime. For the little mini-naps that they still took around lunch and in the evenings, I just let them nap where we were (in the car seat, swing, etc.). I do put my boys down for naps/bed awake so they go to sleep on their owns without rocking or nursing to sleep. Hope this has been helpful. Please feel free to send me a message if you have any questions. Good luck!

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W.L.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter was/is similar. I say "the more she sleeps the more she sleeps and the less she sleeps the less she sleeps." I've found limiting her stimuli and watching for cues (yawns, disinterest in play, sucking her thumb) that she's tired and when I put her down as she gets tired (and not after she's overly tired or overstimulated) she naps well and sleeps well. I know this is hard for grandparents to comprehend, though ;) When grandparents are here they want to engage her all the time and she's so easily overstimulated and then overly tired and we get into the cycle of poor sleep. Also, we would let our daughter cry in 5-10 minute intervals to go to sleep when she was overstimulated or not going down for a nap well. (I hate hearing her cry, thus I try prefer the approach of limiting stimuli). That worked, too. Blessings to you!

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G.A.

answers from Dallas on

I am glad you have given that information about nap time. I had an issue with a parent that does not let her kid nap. She said it was hard to get him to sleep at night. Well, I think they have trouble because they do not let him nap. The min he comes to my day care he wants to nap. Then I will not let him sleep too long and get him up for lunch and he will nap again. My children nap after lunch from 12:30 until almost 4 but some days will all wake up at 3:00. It takes some times a half hour to take each to the bathroom for potty or diaper changing so it is from about 1-3:30. They are all exhausted and so am I. I find the younger ones naturally will go to sleep about the time I am fixing lunch about 11:00. They will sleep some times through lunch and other times I wake them for lunch. Let them play until 1 then put them down again. I had a weird week when it day light time was changing. Some slept a long time through lunch, others were up and I ended up feeding weird times. This week seems to be normal and last week. But for two weeks all were off schedules. I printed out some information online and gave it to the parents. It said contrary to what parents think children who nap some will sleep a long and more peaceful night. Thank you. Just let him have his schedule it will even out. I have a preemie that sleeps a lot. He comes at 5:45 and will sleep until about 11. The doctor says let him sleep.All get worn out after hard play and interaction with each other. I think hard play, a story read, soothing bath calming down after hard play helps children fall asleep easy. We would. Outdoor play also wears them out and fresh air. G. W

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

Get the book "On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep" by Gary Ezzo, Robert Bucknam, Robert Bucknam, M.D. and read it tonight!!!

It is awesome!

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S.J.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with those who recommended Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child. Also Baby Whisperer. Babywise is helpful too, but can be unrealistic as far as breastfed babies go. I combine the best from all of them. They have a lot of good advice to help get your baby sleeping well. Most important is watching the cues and getting the baby to lay down before he gets over stimulated. He shouldn't be awake longer than an hr and 1/2. follow the EASY method (Eat, Awake, Sleep, Yourself: Feed baby, give him some awake time--like on the floor gym/swing/or bouncy seat-- watch cues and put him down for a nap.you could swaddle hold for a minute, lay him down awake in crib, and give paci--let him fuss for a few minutes and come in and calm him down--shhh pat/paci also you can cover his eyes for a minute to block out light that helps too. then while he's asleep, do something for yourself and your sanity) it works! I have a 3 yr old and 3 month old and I will say I'm having such a better time this time around since I knew the routine from the start. (with my first I waited until he was about 3 months old to start the sleep training b/c I didn't have a clue) Hope it works for you!

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S.S.

answers from Dallas on

Napping is hard and every child is different. My first son, now 2, always napped well. From like 3 months on he would nap from 10-12 then 3-5. My second son is now 7 months and I cannot get him to nap regularly to save my soul. He just naps whenever he wants. But one thing I've noticed with him is that if I put him into his crib and turn on the animated mobile we have he will eventually fall asleep.
Good luck, this is hard!

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B.L.

answers from Dallas on

As a nanny fro 17+ years and a mom of a 14 month old my best advice is this...

Babies at that age will need to sleep again after 3 hours of wake time. Some, like mine, need help to do this.

At the 2.45 hour mark of them being awake begin to settle down and relax. Cuddle, nurse, rock, read a book etc. Then put him in his bed really drowsy and "blinky" but not completely asleep. Pat him on his back until he falls asleep in the bed. This will help him get used to falling asleep in his bed and not on you.

It will of course take several months (possibly) to establish a "perfect" routine. The schedule and sleep time routine will greatly help. He will eventually fall into a regular sleep pattern with longer periods of sleep. He will know what to expect and when to expect it and not be confused or surprised by what is happening next.

*if your baby is on a feeding schedule of every 3 hours this will help coordinate naps. If they nurse on demand you might need to top them off before nap time to keep them from hunger waking.

Here is a sample schedule we tried to stick to.
9am wake and nurse
12pm nurse and nap (1 1/2 to 2 hours)
3pm nurse
5pm nap
6pm nurse
9pm nurse and down for the night

If my baby woke early from a nap I would attempt to get him back down. Sometimes he just needed his paci or I would pat him for a minute. More often than not this would work. I would also wake him sometimes to keep him on schedule.

Just keep in mind that every baby is different and you have to take their lead sometimes. As they grow their needs will differ. Enjoy every wakeful second because before you know it he will be running around that house!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Just try to establish a routine that works well for your son and you. If he only sleeps well in the swing, then put him in the swing. Both my sons napped in their bouncy seat, as we called it, until they were around 8-9 months old. Both my sons transitioned to the crib for naps well after that because a routine had already been established.

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D.B.

answers from Dallas on
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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

My son didn't take good crib naps till he was about 4 months old (he took them everywhere else but the crib). On the other hand he slept with no problem at night in his crib....:) It just took time. I started trying the crib naps at 3 mos & it took about a month for it to work. Good luck!

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

My DD didn't really go for a schedule until she was 4 or 5 months old. Even then, it was hard to get her to stay asleep longer than 20-30 minutes b/c she would fall asleep nursing. We eventually (at 5 months old) started letting her cry it out. It was horrible for a couple of days, but she eventually learned to sleep on her own and has since taken good naps at pretty regular intervals (10am-ish-11ish and 4pm-ish-6pm-ish). She goes right down for bed at 8:30pm after milk and Barney. She's now 12 months old and can tell me when she wants to go down, and also says no when she doesn't. :)
Don't be too concerned about it right now. He's still so young.

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C.S.

answers from Dallas on

"On Becoming Baby Wise" I promise this will help all future sleeping habits.
````````````
http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Baby-Wise-Reference-Worldw...

I have two children - one that wore me out and never wanted to go to bed and still doesn't as a teen and another - with the help of "Baby Wise" goes to bed so easy. My husband and I feel like real people. We have a life and have wonderful conversation or do our hobbies or just watch grown up tv. ahhhh.

This books helps you put your baby on a schedule and baby also learns to trust that you are in charge and you will take care of them giving them peace and the ability to fall asleep by themselves.

My son is five now and he never gives us trouble at bed time except for more food. :)

Think how you will avoid all those future stories of how to get your child to stay in bed and go to sleep and you are exhausted!
:)

Congratulations on your little one.
Many hugs to you and baby, C.

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

As much as you want to make sure he is a good napper, he is still very young and has time to develop that skill, so don't beat yourself up over it. Based on the experiences I've had with my DD, I now find it funny that I thought she could get on a schedule at such a young age. I think some kiddos are inclined to it sooner than others. Until about 6 months, I just kept her on a routine, but gave up on a set schedule. Around 6 months old, it seemed like she had changed a lot and I put more effort into a schedule and self-soothing. By then, I think she remembered the routine and hints that nap time was coming. Now, she is nearly 18 months old and has been a great sleeper and napper since she was about 7 - 8 months old. Hang in there! He'll get it. I agree with several of the other responses and I also recommend Healthy Sleep Habits Healthy Child. Personally, I found it very helpful.

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R.A.

answers from Dallas on

I know there are a lot of ways to get your little one on a schedule, but what worked for me was the simple cry it method. It was really hard at first, but it will get better.
We started when i went back to work at 8 weeks, when she gets sleepy or cranky, we lay her in her crib and she might fuss a little, but she gets herself to sleep. She is now 9 months old and we can just lay her in bed and she puts herself to sleep, which is such a blessing.
i wish you all the luck!

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D.W.

answers from Tyler on

Consistency- everyone who cares for your son on the days you are not home needs to follow the same schedule with him. If he knows grandma will hold him more, then he may not sleep... or whatever may be causing him to not want to sleep.

Consistency is really going to be the key.
Hope this helps.
D.

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J.E.

answers from Dallas on

3 months might be a little young for a nap schedule. At that age, most babies still sleep, eat, play, sleep - with a max of 2 hours between sleeps. My daughter was a little over 5 months before a regular nap schedule set in. Try reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." While I don't think the author, Dr. Weissbluth, has all the answers, (he recommends letting a baby cry for up to an hour!) I think he has good recommendations for the amount of sleep a baby needs and at what ages what nap schedules are appropriate.

My daughter napped in her swing until she was almost 6 months old. Don't worry, your son will let you know when he's finished napping in the swing. Until then, it is a very good method for getting a baby to sleep longer. (Weissbluth would disagree.) Also, try swaddling, if you don't already. We still swaddle our 8 month old and it definitely helps to make her a better sleeper. I hear from others that she will let me know when she's finished with the swaddling like she did the swing.

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E.T.

answers from Dallas on

My son would only nap in his swing until he was about 5 months old. It was almost as if, at that point, he was ready to nap in his crib, but not before. At around 5 months, I started to rock him while I nursed him or gave him a bottle, and then when he was almost asleep, I would put him in his crib. When I had done that a couple months earlier, he would wake up and not go to sleep. At about 5 months, he would drift off and nap well.

I know each child is different, but I do think that sometimes you can't rush them on certain things. Also, don't worry too much about 'bad habits.' I worried about that too with the swings, but my son is 16 months now. He goes down easy in his crib for his 2 naps (each about 2 hours a piece), and rarely gives us a problem going to bed, where he sleep from 8-7. It hasn't always gone this well, especially if he gets sick or is teething or something, but I don't feel like we "trained" him -he started sleeping better when his body was ready.

Good luck to you!

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

Don't fret, momma! At 3 months he is not ready for a real schedule. It may be 2-3 more months before that truly kicks in. But you are doing the right thing by sticking to a routine of putting him down for two naps, even if he is inconsistent. I've had three children and never once did a true nap schedule kick in until about 6 months. My youngest is 21 months and ultimately she only settled on one nap in the afternoon. She was about 6-7 months old when she truly became consistent.

And keep trying with the crib. A family member once caved in to her infant son's preference for sleeping in the car sit and boy did she have problems getting him into the crib! Probably your son is just not used to all the room in the crib . . . that was a similar problem I had with my children as well. Maybe hold him or put him in his seat until he is almost alseep, then transfer him to his crib. Again, this is something that will kick in with time. Just be consistent and you will prevail, and your son will thank you in the future because he'll become a wonderful sleeper!

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B.L.

answers from Dallas on

I have a sleep program I can send you. ____@____.com

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