Trying to Get Her to Sleep???

I have a 5yr old and a 3yr old. I found the book best baby on the block when my first was born. I really liked it, but the beset part was what the book and my doctor told me to do... put them to bed for the night, the first time baby wakes wait 5minutes and then go in and rub their tummy, lean in close to their ear to whisper, anything you can do to comfort with out picking up. When they calm down leave. The next time wait 10 minutes before going in, then do the same... next time wait 15 minutes and try to calm again. each time they wake after this wait the 15minutes. Some times it takes a lot of times going in, it all depends on the baby. For me the first night was very long but it only took a few nights of this and we were all slaeeping throught the night. When I did this with my daughter she would go in patterns where she started waking up and each night she woke up more often... but this process worked for her as well each time she started waking up again. From what I have read @ 16lbs baby's no longer need to feed at night...my daughter started sleeping throught the night on her own before this so you choose. Basically I found it is more of a rountine and comfort issue than a needing to eat issue.

My pediatrician recommended giving a bottle of water when she wakes up. It will stave off the hunger and hopefully she will go back to sleep until later in the morning. It only takes 4 days to create a habit for a baby so expect it to last at least that long. Also, if she is able to cry herself to sleep when she goes to bed then she will be more likely to put herself to sleep when she wakes up in the night. I have a 3 yr old boy and an 8mo old girl and she didn't completely start sleeping through the night until maybe 1 or 2 months ago and it really started working when I allowed her to cry herself to sleep for naps and bedtime. If I feed her to sleep she needs the bottle to get herself back to sleep when she wakes up in the middle of the night. I hope this is helpful.

One thing I remember my doctor was saying was to try using just a bottle of water at the time they wake up in the night. Once they realize that they will be getting water and not food hopefully she will stop waking in the night. Especially with babies everything with them is a trained response, they cry they get fed, for example, so maybe the baby just needs to be retrained, but try the water. Good luck.

I wish I had a better answer, but really the only way I know how to fix it is the "cry it out" method. I couldn't do it at that age. I went 13 months with my eldest (who's almost 4) without a full night's sleep. I even quit nursing at 8 1/2 months (much to my sadness) because I thought it would fix the issue. Nope, it didn't. When I was ready, and he clearly understood me when I said "Lay down!" out of complete frustation, I knew it was time to sleep train.

I read all the books and came up with my own version. I stayed on his floor during the entire process and reassured him. I took away all bottles, music, bouncing, etc. No more sleep dependencies. It took about 3 nights of waking up looking for his bottle and me just lying there reassuring him. It was sooo hard to do. I actually did it when my husband was out of town because it was easier with just the two of us.

But once trained, he never cried at night again and at almost 4, sleeps like a log and stays in his twin bed.

Now I have a 15 month old and I still haven't trained him. I haven't thought he's ready. I tried doing things differently with him as an infant and he was better, but every little illness or shot messes him up. I am going to do sleep training when he's over his cold he currently has. I don't look forward to it at all.

I wish you so much luck. Do what is in your heart. If your baby is nice and chubby, I highly doubt it will cause issues if she misses her 4 a.m. bottle and has to wait two or three hours.

D.

Hi T., I feel for you....a lot! My daughter is 7 months old and has been doing the same thing since about 4 months as well. I do get up to feed her around 3am most nights - I have had a few times lately that I havent had to do that but she still wakes me up several times a night - seems like just when I get back to sleep, she wakes up again. It is very frustrating and difficult. I have a 3 year old as well and know somewhat of what you deal with - you have to get sleep to be able to parent the older one as well as the younger. I have found myself nodding off after feeding her (while I am trying to burp her) in the morning and my son (3 year old) is running around the house getting into everything. I was never much of a coffee drinker before the 2nd child but now I am up to at least half a pot a day just to keep me awake.

I wish I had some positive feedback for you as far as what to do. I just felt I needed to respond to let you know that you are not alone and not everyone out there is mean and rude about this subject. Hang in there.

Oh, and if you get any good ideas sent your way, let me know - I would love to hear them!

Hi,
I know how you feel. My daughter was sleeping through the night by 7 weeks - from about 8pm till 630am. Then suddenly at 4 months, started waking up between 2 and 4am and would not sleep until she was fed. Most books I read said feeding her was a mistake! So, the next time she woke up, I gave her water. By the 3rd night, I patted her till she slept, with no water. Did she cry? Yes. Did I feel mean and wicked, CERTAINLY. The 4th night she woke up, whined for like 30minutes then fell asleep. By the end of the week, she'd stopped waking up at night. She did it again about two weeks before she turned 6 months. I figured that since she sleeps at 730pm and she'd taken only about 2 to 3 ounces, which would not get her through the night, I would wake her up between 10 and 11 pm to feed her. I made sure she was awake (a bit drowsy, mostly), played with her for about 5 minutes, then offered her a 4 ounce feed (she's not a huge eater, as you can tell from the figures!) of which she'd take almost all, and then put her back in her bed. Not a peep out of her till morning.
Now she's almost 7 months and still likes to try to play at about 4 am, but after cooing for a couple of minutes with no response, she settles back into sleep.
It's really hard, I know, but you'll need to be firm (with a 4month old? I've got to be kidding you, right?).
Goodluck!

try giving the baby a bath before bedtime. You can also use aroma therapy to get her sleepy. A little bit of lavendar oil never hurt any one. Also, don't let her take long naps during the day. Try to keep her up as long as possible during the day and she will likely sleep through the night. Good luck!!!!

Hi T.,

Well, each baby is different. Mine slept through the night very early on because we began to put some rice cereal in with her milk.Which you have done already, so continue that. :) It makes the tummy more full. It was about 4 or 5 months when we did this for our daughter and it really helped her sleep. I would also research sleeping through the night as an infant and that might help. Also, try not to stress about it, because that can affect the baby, and even if they want to sleep they won't.

I have been there and had that happen. Another thing you can do is use formula just at night. The formulas now are great! They even have bottles designed like a breast nipple just to assits with feeding. That is incredible! Once in a while our daughter would wake, take the bottle in be back to sleep in minutes. Blessings to you. :)

K.S.

As I was doing my morning jig because my 4 month old had slept a whole 4 hours straight last night, I read your post. :) I understand sleep deprivation as I am also living it with a 2 year old and 4 month old that sometimes wakes hourly at night - so I truly know where you are and how desperate one can become for sleep. First, I do think it is an unrealistic expectation to expect more than a 7 hour stretch from a baby so young. Even with heavy, slower to digest foods like formula and rice in her belly she still has a tiny tummy and it will be empty by then.

So I would move on to how to get as much sleep as possible within the constraints of your kids' sleep schedules. What time do your boys go to bed? If their bedtime is earlier then I would really work on moving your daughter's bedtime to theirs as well. That has really saved my sanity. Make sure the whole house is dark and quiet for an hour before bedtime, do the same quiet bedtime routine with all the kids and then after you put the toddlers to bed, give your daughter her bottle and sing/rock/whatever to indicate it's time to sleep. Then, and this is the important part, GO TO BED as soon as all the kids are asleep. You can get back to your husband/cleaning/watching TV time (whatever you usually do after the kids are asleep) in a couple months when your daughter is sleeping better. Right now though that can all wait until you get the sleep you need.

I hope you find a good solution and I'll be watching this post for pointers as well!

A.

I'm not sure what your routine is before bed, but what helped us (and now my son sleep through the night) I give him a bath after his last afternoon nap. Then I we do a lot of playing, basically I make him really tired. I give him his last bottle a half hour to an hour before bed time. By this time he's so tired and cranky that he goes to sleep without any problems. If we fusses at night, we play soft music that's beside his crib and give him his pacifier and he goes back to sleep. Sometimes we give him water if he's really fussy.

I know how hard it is. My sister's son and daugther are not good sleepers at all. Her son has never been a good sleeper, he still wakes up at night sometimes and he's 4. It's difficult, but I'm sure you'll find somethin that works for you soon enough.

I have a 4 month old son,he doesn't sleep through the night but he will sleep for 5-6 hours at a time. I talked to my pediatrician and she told me that when you see him stirring or getting restless, get the bottle and feed him before he's had too much crying or stimulation. Basically don't talk to him, ignore eye contact and he will go back to sleep after finishing his bottle. It works!! He takes his bottle and sometimes doesn't finish it all before he's asleep. I tried the rice cereal in his bottle. It didn't make ANY difference to his sleep pattern. Good luck to you, sleep deprevation is the pits!! but this too shall pass!

Seriously, count your blessings!!! Neither of my children slept like that until they were 3.

According to the sleep book here, babies are naturally hungry at 4 or 5 am. Please do not let her cry. Go to her. Feed her. And then crawl back into bed!

There will be times hen she is teething or sick and she should be soothed then as well.

Good Luck!!

I'm glad you put your question here, you're right, this is a really supportive site.

There are no easy answers to the sleep questions. I had my second baby while the first was only 1. I really wanted the baby to sleep through! I started putting her on the same bedtime schedule as Big Sister around 7 p.m.- jammies, stories, rocking, and then put her to bed. Even though I knew she'd wake up again, I just acted like she was going to bed for the night. Then she'd wake up again around 11 p.m. to eat. I fed her then and put her right back to bed. With such a late feeding, she could usually make it until at least 6, which was enough for me to not lose my mind. I hope you find something that works for you, but even if you don't, since you have two older kids, you know that this won't last forever, and soon your Baby will be sleeping just like her big sibs. Good luck.

Hi there,

Unfortunately, you really have to accept the fact that this is normal and that it will be a little while before she can start sleeping through the night. Eventually, the time will come and you will be able to sleep through the night...just hang in there and be patient with her. It's tough having 3 kids at those young ages, but I don't encourage forcing them to sleep through the night when they are that young. That's part of their development. My suggestion is if they take naps around the same time...take one too!! That's the only way you can catch up on your sleep. Have someone watch the kids if they don't nap at the same time so you can nap for a bit yourself.
I was very surprised when my daughter was 6 weeks old to start sleeping through the night. It happened when we were in CA for my brother's wedding, we lived in Baltimroe at that time. I guess it was the CA air that did the trick...this was a big surprise for us and we actually thought she was dead! (Thinking of SID too.) My son on the other hand didn't sleep through the night until he was about 5 or 6 months old.
D.

Hello T. -

Doctors have a tendency to lump all kids into only two or three very general categories. Sure, lots of kids are sleeping through the night by this age, but lots of them are NOT, so try not to take your doc too seriously.

What worked with my kids was bringing them to bed with me after they woke for a feeding. I was never a mom who could sit in the rocker and stay awake for 20-40 minutes while they nursed, so I took the wee one into bed and laid him (we have all boys) next to me and gave him the breast. He would nurse then fall asleep and we would stay there, snoozing until the rest of the house was stirring. It allowed me to get them back to sleep right away without interrupting my sleep cycle too much and without waking the rest of the house.

Bottom line is that they are waking and crying because they need something from us. Either she has a wet diaper and being chilled woke her, or she needs food. If you are breastfeeding, I recommend the above. If you are bottle feeding then the cereal in the bottle trick is the best solution I have heard of.

Best wishes.
D.

T.,

I think that a lot of changes in a baby's schedule take time to "sink in". Hopefully, the fact that she slept longer that first week is a good sign that she can, and maybe will (soon...hope hope) develop this routine.

With my son, he had a period of time where he'd wake up an hour after going down at night, and flatly refuse to go back to sleep until he was nursed. I read a book recommended to me by a family member (who has a degree in infant care, and is just someone I plain respect), and got a big "education" about the importance of sleep. It's a great book....lots of great information, even some scientific information about the need for sleep, how sleep works, etc.....BUT, if you don't WANT any scientific information, you don't need to worry about that part. It's mostly in the introduction. In the chapters, divided up by ages, it's mostly just stories about what parents tried, and a pretty good variety of choices of what to do for each sleep "issue".

The book is called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth.

Anyway, what I learned was, I needed to let my son cry, to get used to the new routine, until HE got used to it.

Of course, that's easy for me to say. My son was older than your daughter, and I don't have other kids. But really, it's never easy to listen to your child cry. 10 minutes feels like an hour. But, I must say, it worked like a dream. He's a great little sleeper. And I don't remember what they recommend for 4 months, because, like I said, my son was older when we worked on this issue.

Good Luck!! You'll figure it out....let us know what happens!!!

the book Baby Wise changed our lives!!! Originally we thought how weird to put a baby on a schedule, but we tried it for just 2 weeks and our baby was happier, calmer and sleeping 8 hours (now she sleeps 10 hours at 8mos). Buy the book, buy the book! Good Luck

Hi T.! Sounds like you have your hands full! I know the feeling of sleep deprivation, it's really no fun. What got me through was remembering that the situation really is temporary. You will be getting more rest "soon" :) For now, your baby will need to be fed when she is hungry, regardless of what time it is. All babies are unique and will sleep "through the night" at various ages. If she is not even 4 months and is sleeping from 9pm-4am, I would say she is doing pretty good! My son didn't do that until he was 7 or 8 months. I think co-sleeping helped us while we were breastfeeding (and even when we had to switch to formula). If you are bottle feeding with formula (it sounds like you may be), you can keep a thermos of warm water ready with all of your clean bottle parts and formula so the bottle making is quicker. Hopefully it will help in allowing her to fall back to sleep easily. Hang in there. You are doing great and you aren't alone!

A great book is called " On becoming babywise" it gives you great hints and tips about getting your baby to sleep 7 - 8 hours through. Once baby sleeps for a certain period of time, you know she can go that long without eating, try soothing her back with some back rubs or water. Try to avoid picking her up and cuddling as this can lead to an even worse habit of having to rock her to sleep! An extra feeding before bed can also help! Good luck!

I would read Elizabeth Pantley's book (or portions of it) called the "No Cry Sleep Solution" if I were you....if you follow her method and it is still a problem, then she may be having a growth spurt and therefore need more food for a bit. I also found that anytime my daughter was learning a new skill (rolling over, sitting up, crawling) she would go through a really bad patch sleep wise...and to be frank, 4 months is really early to expect her to sleep longer. From what I read, "through the night" for a baby that young means 6 consecutive hours (bummer I know).

And of course in my situation, my daughter had GERD - so anytime she was flat for any length of time with no food in her tummy, she was in pain...but unless she has other symptoms, I wouldn't suspect that.

Now for the bad news...some kids are just early risers...we have tried everything and the absolute latest my daughter sleeps (now 21 months) is 6:00AM and that is a RARITY! Normal for her is 5:00AM.....granted she takes a 3 hour nap every day (and yes, we tried shortening and eliminating that, no luck) but she is just too excited to get her day going. LOL! Lucky me...not a morning person myself, so it is really really hard. This too shall pass.

Oh also as FYI - "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Karp, is a great book (mentioned in an earlier post) but is really geared for the first 3 months so will be less useful to you at this point.

Good Luck!
K.

Hi - every child is different as to when they start sleeping through the night. I would really try to stop worrying about when she is going to do this and force her to try to sleep through the night when she is maybe not ready to do it. I will tell you too that my son is 11 months old now and as hard as I have tried to get him to sleep later in the morning, he wakes up at 5:30 without fail. Maybe for some reason that 4 am time has become a natural time for her to wake up and be hungry. My sons were both about 5-5 1/2 months old before they slept through the night. I did the cry it out method for them and it worked for us. It may not work for you. I would feed her if she needs to be fed. I know it is hard not getting sleep, but it will happen. It sounds like you need some help too from your husband? I would get him to help you put the others to bed! Just try to relax about it and go with your baby's ques. To me, it sounds like she may not be ready to sleep through the night and still needs to be fed, which is okay!

Yes I agree it is a touchy subject. So here it goes, we have a boy who is three and a little girl who is four months. We used the concept in a book named Babywise. Ever book you have to choose what you like from it and disregard what seems to extreme for your taste, however the general concept worked. My son slept through the night at four months and our girl at three. Also make sure that is not her teeth coming in and interfering her night time sleep. Good luck and I hope you get your needed sleep.

Hello T.. In my book, a 4 month old who sleeps from 9 pm til 4 am IS sleeping through the night. That's 7 hours straight, and it is not surprising that she is hungry when she wakes up. The problem is that no one else in the house is ready to start the day at 4 am!

You could give her a quick "snack" at 4 am and let her go back to sleep for a couple of hours. Or you could adjust her schedule so that her last feeding is later at night and hope she wakes up later in the morning as well.

Well I'm sorry about the trouble you are going through. My daughter just started sleeping in on her own. I have a suggestion I heard from other people. They have given water instead of formula/breastmilk. This way the baby will be like hect I am not waking for that and wait until morning. Hope that works or you find a solution.

My son didn't sleep through the night until 18 months! Every child is different. Try that book called "the happiest child on the block" or something like that. It is supposed to be a really good book for helping set up routines so children sleep through the night.

I hate it when people say to 'let them cry' - that may work with some children, but not with the strong-spirited ones, and a child is crying because he/she needs something.

I know one thing is making sure your daughter gets a nap during the day so she is not over-tired at night.

My oldest started sleeping through the night at six months. (Of course, he stopped taking naps during the day so there was a trade off!)

Have you ever tried to go to sleep when you're hungry? It just doesn't work. And babies just have such small stomachs and fast metabolisms. Feed your baby when she's hungry and go back to bed. It won't last much longer and you'll miss this age soon enough.

I know exactly how you feel! I am also a stay at home mom with 2 boys and a baby girl. My oldest boy just turned 4, #2 will be 2 in April and my baby is 4 1/2 months old. I did the crying himself to sleep thing with my second son (my first son is a natural born sleeper...I think that's why I expect my other 2 to be like that too?) It would work after a couple nights of crying it out (he was older though like 6 months, again at 8 months and again at 12 months we did that!) but eventually he'd start waking up again wanting to eat. It's hard and was so cranky in the middle of the night waking up to feed him. But he now sleeps through the night, but he was a lot of work to get him there. I haven't made my daugther cry it out yet since she's still so young. When she doesn't sleep through the night I just feed her and put her straight back to bed. If this continues when she's older we'll resort to the crying-it-out thing. Is your daughter warm enough at night? We recently started having our baby sleep in a sleeper blanket (it's basically like a fleece blanket that zips on like a pj bag, it goes over the pjs). Plus we still put a blanket over that and once she started sleeping in that she seems to sleep better at night. She may be growing, that is why she started waking up to eat again? Does she nap a lot during the day? I started trying to keep her up for longer periods of time during the day too which helps. I know a routine can be hard, but I've found that by feeding them about the same time each day and having naps at a regular time (hers are 9-10/10:30 am and again from 1pm-4pm and after her bath around 7 she has a 20-30 minute nap) my kids sleep better through the night. I know it's hard, it really is, and I have to remind myselfof this EVERYDAY but we will get through it and sooner than we know it, they'll be grown up and this will be long forgotten. Best of luck to you!!

Have you tried "filling her up" during the day? I read a book that said if you feed your infant more during the day (maybe even when she's not indicating she's hungry), it will help sustain her. I do it with my little boy (almost 3 months) and it usually works. Also, check to see that she's not cold. My little one gets really cold at night so I have to really bundle him up. If I don't, he wakes up and wants to eat just to get some warmth. Just a thought! Good luck!

Hi. I don't suppose you are able to get to bed right after the 9 pm feeding. Have you tried to feed her again right before you go to bed? Even if she isn't asking for it, a "night cap" might get her to sleep in.

My four month old son sleeps through the night for about 9 hours. He slept 6 hours a night when he was 6 weeks. I will just tell you what I do, and maybe it will help you. I swear by the book, "On Becoming Babywise" ....It teaches that your schedule during the day with your baby's eating and sleeping patterns will help them sleep through the night. At this age, your baby should be taking 2-3 naps a day the morning and afternoon nap should last about 1 1/2 -2 hours in length. Basically, feed your baby, followed by some awake time, and then lay them down for a nap. Don't let them sleep directly after a feeding, unless it is bedtime. Also, I have heard that adding cereal doesn't actually make them sleep any longer, but could aggrivate their stomach, making it harder to sleep. My son is still breastfed and sleeps through the night, so I guess feeding them cereal wont help...Not to say that you have to breastfeed. Actually the book says that formula fed babies can sleep about 11 hours at night at this age.. Some people still think they need a feeding at night, but mine doesn't .
Well I hope this helps you. Check the book out it explains things a lot better than me! It really helped...This is my first baby, and all my sisters used the books guidelines to get their kids on schedules, and it worked for them, too! Good luck!

Our son just turned three months so we're in similar situations. I heard from our pediatrician that a child is considered sleeping through the night if/when he/she gets a full five hours of sleep, not the 8-10 some of us adults are used to. I read The Happiest Baby on the Block, which several people have recommended, and I would highly recommend it as well. I didn't think I would co-sleep with our child until after reading this book and others about attachment parenting (if you're interested try Dr. Sears' book "Attachment Parenting") Our son's bedtime tended to fall around 1-2am in the morning, a little too late for our tastes. So we started swaddling him at night and placing him in our bed with us on either side. The lights were dimmed so it was dark enough to promote sleep but light enough that he could see both of us. I did read in another book that swaddling past a certain age can cause damage to babies' hip bones so we left his legs free, just tightly wrapping his arms. It works probably 85% of the time to get him to sleep. Occasionally he'll need to nurse a little but then he falls asleep. The best thing is he is learning we are there for him if he needs us. I don't think I have the strength to use the cry-it-out method but I support people who do. You have to find whatever works best for your child.

Hi T.,

I feel your pain and I understand just how stressful this can be. It must be so much harder having two more to care for. Also, very well meaning people can be so pushy with advice (particularly loved ones is what I have found). I have a 6 month old who up until just recently had been sucking and draining every last drop of energy out of me litterally. She demanded to be fed and put back to sleep by nursing everytime she woke up which ranged from every 2 hours to every 20 minutes. I too tried letting her cry it out, like what you experienced, she wouldn't stop crying. I my case it made matters worse and she was harder to put down. So I read about 4-5 books on the subject to decide what would work best for our family. They ranged from "crying it out" to "no cry" to basicly continue what I am doing because "it is such a short time in your child's life." I am sure as you are finding with 3 children it doesn't feel so short and I imagine you might be feeling quite desperate right now. The middle of the road appoach that I found was the "Baby Whisperer." She recommends a 4 hour Eat Activity Sleep and then You routine NOT schedule(EASY) that takes care of a lot of the problems you have mentioned. The pick up/put down method was very helpful for our daughter. She went from 20 minute stretches and having to eat to be put back to sleep to 4-5 hour stretches in 1-2 days. The biggest success for us was getting her from expecting to eat to be put to sleep and learning to fall asleep by herself. We also found that she wasn't eating enough during the day (which may not be your problem). Her idea of "dream feeds" worked wonders. It is where you feed her while she is asleep at a certain time so she doesn't wake you later. I felt like we overhauled the whole day and in effect told her who was boss when she was taking control of the whole family.

She explains the difference between habitual waking, which may be the 4 am waking, and waking due to hunger or discomfort and how to fix both.

We have regressed into some of our old habits again, and have always had a problem with set times, but we still are benifiting from doing the EASY routine on our terms. There is such great wisdom in this book that I have to recommend checking it out at the library! The second book is better than the first published. Below is a link to amazon.

http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Whisperer-Solves-Your-Problems...

Good luck T. and sweet dreams ahead.

I had to let my now 3 1/2 yr old cry it out-it was painful, but eventually it worked. It took him less than a week and in the beginning he would cry for a LONG time, and then it got less and less each night. I also purchased the camera monitor system where there was a camera over his crib and then I had a tv monitor to watch him next to my bed. That way I knew there wasn't anything physically wrong with him. It was so difficult to do, but it paid off in the long run. It's also something that can be such a touchy subject with others who don't believe in letting little ones cry it out, but every child has a different temperment and mommas need to get their sleep.

Hi T....I know how you feel. My son was almost four months and he was still waking up every two to four hours to eat...I had to go back to work so I decided I had to do something. I used the "Ferber Method"...I is basically where you let them cry it out. It usually takes three...very painful nights and then they sleep. The first night he cried for about thirty minutes off and on through the night...no kidding..I thought I was going to die...but the next night it was for about fifteen minutes total and then the next about ten and then he was sleeping through the night. I know a lot of people object to the letting your child cry it out but if they are healthy..weight wise and such...they do not need to eat at night. Before I did it I checked with my pediatrician and he recommended letting him cry it out. I said how long and he said atleast twenty minutes before you go in and feed him. Another thing I have read is decreasing how much you feed them at night...like if you are giving her 6 oz when she wakes now decrease it to 4 oz one night then slowly decrease the amount every other night until you are only giving like an ounce and she should stop depending on that nightly feeding.

Is she napping too much maybe? I know babies this age need around 14 hours of sleep total (wide range of course!). My 5 month old seems to do well with anywhere from 12-15 hours. If left to sleep as long as he'd like at night (which unfortunately, he wants to stay up until 11ish, and then I have to get him up by 7:15!), he usually sleeps 9-10.5 hours. We haven't started cereal yet, he just nurses 5 times a day (maybe I am a lucky one!) I do still swaddle him pretty tightly, my doctor said as long as he needs it, go for it- maybe swaddling would help? Good luck!

first off, I admire you for having three kids, I'm sure it's a lot of work!
There are many ways parents choose to stop the night feeding, some don't for a long time because it's they don't want their babies to cry and it gets them back to sleep easily. I will tell you what we chose to do and it worked wonderfully fast. When our son was 4 months old, we decided to let him cry when he woke for his night feeding. The first night he cried for 22 min. It was sooooo hard to lay there and listen to him cry and not go in, but he finally went back to sleep. The next night he cried for 8 min. and the next night after that was for 3 minutes. It took about another week that he's wake and fuss for about 1 minute but since then(now he's 18months) he's a great sleeper! now at night, he'll even say bed and reach for his bed to sleep!
I wish you luck!

Hi again, T.! I have a 5 month old daughter, who is just naturally a good sleeper. Thank the Lord! But, here are some things we have done since day 1 with her. We always play with her during the day after she eats. We do the baby whisperer method of E.A.S.Y.: Eat, Activity, Sleep, You time (yeah right!). So, at 4 months old, she would eat, play for 1-2 hours or so, and then sleep again. This seems to help tire her out, so she will sleep longer. We also try to feed her every 3-4 hours during the day, which is supposed to help them sleep longer at night, too. Then, we do one last later night feed between 10 and 11.
We also still swaddle her and have a special swaddle blanket that keeps her snug and secure.
Our older daughter needed white noise to help her sleep. So, we always had a fan going in her room.
We have also found that the better she naps during the day, the better she sleeps at night because she isn't overly tired and can just relax and sleep. She often sleeps for 4 hours in the afternoon and takes a 1 hour nap in the morning. Then, we put her down to sleep at night at about 8:00. Then, my husband gets her up around 10 or 11 to give her the last bottle of the night.
Best of luck! Sweet dreams!

It is so frustrating I know!!! My oldest daughter went through that at 5 months old. My pediatrician said to let her cry it out and that it would only take 3 nights. The first night she screamed for 3 and half hours!!!! I sat outside her door bawling my head off. The 2nd night it was only an hour and a half, the third night about 45 minutes..then about 20 minutes. Then it was all over and she's been a great sleeper ever since. I'll tell you right now it was the HARDEST thing I ever had to do because you just want to go in there and fix it!

The other thing I would suggest is reading both "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Harvey Karp, MD. The man is a genius. It may be that your baby still could benefit from being swaddled really tight (I know it sounds crazy but it's not) and also some kind of white noise mechanism in in the room (like a fan). My 9 and 5 year olds still sleep with fans in their room and they're great sleepers!

Good luck! Do you have any family around that could take your kids for one night so that you could get at least one night of good sleep?

I'm a 38 year old stay at home mom of 2 girls (9 and 5)

L.

I agree with your doctor. Infants need to be fed in the middle of the night, often until over 1 year of age. My son ate 2 full meals in the middle of the night until he was 18 months old. If you're breast-feeding and sleeping with your child it's easy to feed them in the middle of the night, quickly and quietly. Please read the article below, it really explains why touch in infancy is so important for neurological development and lifelong happiness. Touch (sleeping with your child and carrying them during the day) is just as important as eating and having your diaper changed. If you're sleeping with your daughter she will hardly wake up in the middle of the night, feed and then quickly be asleep again. :)

http://faculty.plts.edu/gpence/PS2010/html/Touch%20and%20...

One thing that helps to remember is that babies grow in spurts. When my babies were GROWING(!!) (they never seem to just "grow," you know), they HAD to eat, NOWWWWW!, like four times a night ... and I would be, OMG, I Just Can't Do This. And then a week or two later they'd return to once a night maintenance feedings for a month or so ...

Since you are supplementing or not breastefeeding (unclear), can your partner alternate with you?

One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard was "Always assume your partner is at least as tired as you are"--this helped me to not snap at him. But I missed the corollary, "Your partner may also not understand that about you": you need sleep, and your partner probably would be glad to help with that if they really understood the gift it would be to you. Most partners of SAHM's just don't understand (it often never occurs to them) the 24/7 nature of the job--that you CAN'T "turn off" unless someone else has directly said, "It's OK, I'll do it."

Hi T.,

A seven hour stretch for an almost 4-month old sounds like through the night to me! I say you're lucky! Also, I've heard the cereal in the bottle is an old wives tale. My state dept. of health and the AAP and I believe the WHO all state that babies need nothing but breast milk and formula for the first 6 mo. I have heard that introducing solids too early can cause allergies. Perhaps she has developed an allergy? Also, babies, as I'm sure you've figured out w/ having had 3 aren't made from cookie cutters. So, saying a baby should sleep through the night at 4 mo (which your baby, isn't yet right?) is just sort of a guideline. Just follow your babies cues. The bottom line is that after 7 hours she's probably just hungry.

Try giving her a separate bowl oatmeal instead at night. Then right before she goes to bed, feed her a bottle. That worked really well when my kids were babies. It filled their tummies up so they didn't wake up until about 6 or 7 (going to bed around 9 or 10) My kids awesome until they were about 1 year old...it's now that they're toddlers we have problems!! LOL!

Also, I hate to say it, but 4 months is a little young to be asking her to sleep through the night. I know that as adults we like to have our schedules and yes, we like our sleep, especially with toddlers too. However, it might just be what your little girl needs from you right now and you might just have to grin and bear it for another few months. In perspective, 6 months of waking up is better than 4 years of it, right? lol.

The book Healthy sleep habits, happy child (they should have it at the library) was a life saver for my family. Check it out, good luck. Only one of my three slept through the night before 8 months though :(

Granted it has been 20+ years since my boys were little but I went back to work within 6 weeks after their birth and I needed to get sleep also. First, I did give them a bit of cereal at night and the other thing I noticed was when they got to be at least 12 lbs, then they were able to sleep more than 4 or 5 hours at a time. My grandson is doing the same thing, he has reached 12 lbs and is sleeping a lot longer. Hang in there! L.

My kids are 12 & 15 years old now, but I remember many night-time feedings! They both woke up during the night for feeding and a clean diaper until they were about 12 months old. It's great to hear mom's gush about how their babies slept through the night at 3 months or whatever, but the reality is your little one needs something and you or your husband need to provide it. I'm not saying it's easy, but I don't think anyone thinks parenting is easy. My kids are bright and wonderful and so much fun! I hope the extra time I spent nurturing them in the middle of the night are partly the reason. Take care and grab that cat nap when you can! Also, don't be afraid to ask your husband for help. A. M.

There is a book called BabyWise. I totally reccommend it. It helps with establishing feeding, wake, and nap times. Not to mention the problem with sleeping through the night. You don't have to use it as a solve-all, but I found it very helpful. My little guy was sleeping about 6-8 hours through the night at 2 months old. Give it a try. Really, the important thing is to establish a routine with the babe. This helps them get their matabolism in line with daily/nightly schedules.

Hi, T.- I haven't read the other responses yet, but if it were me I'd let her sleep with me. It really makes it easier to just feed her (sometimes while you snooze), she goes right back to sleep, everybody's happy. If you have fears or questions about co-sleeping, check out askdrsears.com for some great info... We didn't co-sleep per se, more of a combination (half the night). It's all about what works for you and your family!
blessings-