Trouble with My Toddler Going to Sleep by Helself

Start by taking her to her own bed to lay down with her. She needs to get used to being awake and laying in her own bed. This will help her get used to the sounds and feelings she has in there in the dark.

Once she's asleep you can get up and go back to your own stuff. You can wean her off this after she is feeling more confident and secure in there.

As long as she falls asleep in your bed she won't ever get used to being in her own room to relax and fall asleep.

Hi M.,
So, I'm guessing she's not in a crib?
Have you tried playing a story CD or music so she can unwind, listen & relax?
Really, if you don't want to do it how you're doing it now, you need to change the routine, follow it, get her used to it and stick to it!
Do everything on your list, but add take her to her room, kiss goodnight, nightlife, music or story CD, say goodnight & out you go!

Maybe you can do a sticker/reward chart for smooth nights?
Good luck!

At that age, we laid down with our toddler until she fell asleep because she was in our bed, not a crib. By 3, she moved into her own twin bed, but we still had to lay down with her for another 6 months. At that point, we told her that she was going to be going to sleep by herself now, just like other kids she knew did. We installed a clock with hands on the wall at the end of her bed and we showed her the big hand of the clock and told her that by the time it reaches such and such number, she should be asleep (about 15 minutes). She was at an age where she understood and it worked for us. I think you may have to wait a bit longer until she is truly able to get to sleep on her own, independently. Good luck.