Trouble Getting 2 Year Old to Stay in Toddler Bed

I have the same problem...I have tried the earlier bed times, no nap in afternoon and earlier bed times, I pretty much have our routine down with brushing teeth, getting sippy cup of ice water, saying good nite to Daddy, and then to bed. She will stay in bed for 10-15 min and then it is right back downstairs. I am constantly taking her right back into her bed. After close to 2 hrs some nights she finally gives in and falls asleep. However she gets up like 3 hrs later and we do the same thing all over again. I know that this was not much help but be rest assured you are not alone!! Good luck.

Hey S.. My son is 18 months old so I don't have personal experience about your situation so I'm just throwing some ideas out there. Maybe, even though he was climbing out, he isn't ready to be in a bed; clearly its safer to have him out of the crib though. What about putting him in a pack n play instead of the toddler bed for all sleep periods. Or maybe night sleep in the pnp and then naps in the bed to sort of ease him into it?

S.,

I have been nannying for several families in the past and still do. I love this show in England called "House of Tiny Tearaways". Don't know if you have heard of it or have seen it, but it is basically a psychologist living with a family for a week and helping them with questions and problems they have with their children.

About your son, do you have a bedtime routine? I found it is easier to put kids to bed at this age after a warm bath to relax them and then doing the whole brushing teeth/pajamas, and a story that is not raced through. Some of my favorite moments were putting the kids to bed because we would wrap-up the day or just talk face-to-face, etc. And singing the son marks the end and that you will be leaving or have something. I know this all takes time, but it is important. And if you have a husband or caregiver, then, it is important that your son also has a routine and knows this with them.

Also, it is important to say that it is time to go to bed and that you will be there ... and that it is bed time and you need to stay in your bed. Tell him that if he gets up, then, you will put him back in his bed, etc. He needs to know your clear expectations and what will happen.

On the show, the first few nights, the mothers ended up putting the kids back in bed a ridiculous amount of times (sometimes 40+), but by the third night the kids knew what was going to happen. When you put him back in his bed, do it gently and DO NOT talk to him, lay next top him, and leave. It might sound harsh, but it will be hard to do this the first two nights ... but it works! There will be a lot of crying, but this will give you PEACE with yourself and the situation in the long run! He will eventually stay in his bed at night-time.

Some things to consider are to make sure that toys are generally put away, so your son would not be distracted while he is laying in bed. Maybe you could do this before the bath routine?

Another thing, I am not sure what time he takes a nap, how overtired he is during the day, what time he sleeps in, etc.

Or maybe you work during the day and are only home during the bedtime routine and he just wants to be with you as much as he can.

There are so many factors to consider, but try doing the return to bed routine for a few nights and see what happens. IT really does work! It does have a specific name, but am not sure what it is off the top of my head. Hope this helps.

Is he afraid of anything at night? with my sons, we made "monster spray" to banish any uglies hiding under beds, in closets,etc. Simply mix water and lavendar essential oil in a spray bottle. The lavendar also is relaxing and helps with sleep. Since he's only two, it's a little tougher to reason with him. But he's training you nicely by making sure you lay with him until he falls asleep. You could try rewarding him for staying in bed. With my daughter, when she was about 2, I would tell her that if she stayed in her bed until I came back to check on her, I would tell her a short story or I would rub her back or I would brush her hair or sing her a song. At first I would come in within three to five minutes. Pretty soon it was five to ten. Then it was fifteen. And after that she was almost always asleep. And, if she did get out of bed, I would simply pick her up and put her back in her bed. Occasionally I was faced with tears and tantrums, but consistency paid off and she's now a snap to get into bed. My three year old now gets into bed easily, although he's spoiled by getting fifteen minutes of Animal Planet when he goes to bed. Would relaxing music help as well? My oldest son was always soothed by music like Clannad or Enya or Loreena McKennitt (he didn't like standard lullabies, but loved Celtic music). I'm just tossing out as many ideas as I can. I hope something can help!

I just sent a request similar to your's. My 2 1/2 year old is doing the same things. It is very frustrating. I actually heard him up in the middle of the night the other night. We can't lock the door because its old and gates are expensive and in the way so we put a towel on the top of the door and he can't open it. So that solves the wandering at night problem

The other issue that I see is they don't go to sleep or stay in the bed. My son was finally asleep at 10pm last night and my husband found him on the floor. I refuse to lay down with him because I know people that have and its so hard to break that habit. What we do is keep putting him back in bed an don't say anything to him. This hasn't been too successful yet, but I think eventually when he gets a little older it'll all work out. The main thing is to keep him safe. I've removed almost everything from his room.

Good luck and let me know if you figure something out.

My 2 1/2 year old will get up too. I recently put a night light in her room(a blue one so it's not so bright). If she gets up too much, I tell her I will lock her door if she gets up again. And I have held the door shut or put the safety cover on the inside door knob before. When I do that, she cries a bit and gets back in bed. I would like to keep her door open at night, but my husband would wake her up in the early morning getting ready for work. I also play some lullaby music that turns off on it's own. That seems to help. I used to have a CD player in her room and play a CD every night until the CD player stopped working. I think I will try the CD again and see if that helps her stay in bed. Good luck! It can be quite frustrating! Try to break the habit of laying with her.

I have been having the same problem with my two year old as well. He rooms with his older brother (7) so that doesn't help much.
He was doing the same thing as your son, he'd be appy as long as we were in his room but once we left he'd follow us out and we'd put him back a million times. Bedtime would start a little after 8 and we wouldn't get him to sleep until well after 10 and that was with a lot of crying, threatening and frustration. So this week at bedtime I started playing soothing classical music in their room at bedtime and I can not believe the change! He will get out a few times and make a bit of a stink but within half an hour he will be asleep. I really think the music is helping with that. I sure hope I am not jinxing myself by telling you:) SO if you are able, put a cd player in or near his room and play come classical music, calming music and see if it helps, its worth a try anyways.
Hope that helps
K. H

With my oldest I made a special routine for her. We would go to brush her teeth and I would tell her how proud I was of her. We bought her a special toddler bed and for the first few days I would have to lay on the floor until she would go to sleep. Or sometimes she would fall asleep in my arms and I would place her in her bed. I put a gate by her door and she had side rails on her bed so she couldn't fall out. Evenutally she caught on and started to go to sleep without alot of prodding.

I'm sorry, S. but I don't have any suggestions... I just wanted to let you know that you are NOT ALONE! Our little boy turned 3 on Wednesday and still won't go to bed alone. We end up moving him from our bed to his after he falls asleep with us. He does the same thing with following us out the door and has said he's afraid of the dark because of ghosts if we try to get him to go to his own bed by himself. Good luck... both with the two year old and with your pregnancy! Nicki

We tried the nanny 911 where we kept putting our dauther in her bed. That lasted a 1/2 hour before I was exhausted, we put up a child gate but she'd cry and cry to the point she pooped herself, and we laid in there but another bad habit was starting, and then after my husband did some research....we shut the door and our daughter freaked out and cried but it worked. By shutting the door she couldn't see that we were doing. We put the door knob cover on her side so she couldn't open the door. She cried for over an hour then as the days went on it gradully got better and better. I checked on her after 10-15 minutes or so to make sure she didn't poop herself. We'd get to the point she started to chase us out the door but we'd push her back or run faster than her. It seems so cruel and it hurt so bad but it was the only thing that we thought we had left to do and it allowed us to get enough sleep to function at work.

two gates stacked up on top of eachother.
light off in the hallway.
take all the toys out of the room.
ignore.

in two days, you'll have a kid who sleeps in her bed. or on the floor...but she'll understand it's bedtime and not snuggle with mom and dad time.

parents always are going to have bedtime struggles, I think, until they're teenagers and we give up and they figure out how important sleep is. Our job is to enforce the rules.

It's not a punishment...I don't think I'm a strict parent but when it comes to bedtime, I thing its very important moms and dads have time to themselves at night and that kids get lots of sleep b/c they're growing.

good luck!