Transitioning Two Kids to One Room

Well if i was you i would put them in the same room. I might or might not keep there sleep times the same it all depends. You could make this change at the same time you move them. The benefits to putting them down at the same time is you can read to them together and lay them down at the same time. If you don't normally have trouble with the older one you can talk to her about setting an example for the younger one. It is a good way to teach sharing and it will make the bond better. (if the room is big enough) Good luck

First, kudos. I am so impressed you would be willing to share with your Mom to give your kids their own space. tha tis dedicaiton and love and real sensitivity yto them and putting them first.

But, yes, have your own room. You will be a better Mom for it. I dont' know how long kids can room together like that, so I can't help there. In general, I think it is preferable for kids to hav etheir own rooms. They can learn to share in lots of other ways. But if they need to share, they will do great.

I would suggest looking at your new home and considering how to giv eyour kids their own space. I feel especially for your four-year old girl, but I think it applies to your son too. FOr instance, do they have a playroom? Can you set up a little playhouse for your daughter to be "just hers" and somethign similar for your son. Or can you giv eher her own special chair with her name on it. I don't know if I am saying it well, but I don't think kids should hav eto share everything. I think they are entitled ot their own space, their own special toys, their own alone time. And anything you can do to encourage and enforce that, I think you should.

I thik your idea of keeping your daughter up later is a great idea. Even if it is just 10 minutes alone iwht Mom it gives ehr her own time. And it gives you son a chance to go to sleep without them riling each other up. I also would keep him in the crib for a few months. Restricting him physically will enforce the new boundaries of the new house (go to bed and stay in bed). Then when you move to a bed, he will know the rules.

When we moved in November, we moved from a large house into a three bedroom apt. We need one of the rooms to be an office, so the kids have to share a room. They were almost two, and four years old (two girls) at the time. They have actually really loved it and now prefer it. At first, I wasn't sure how it was going to be, but it's ended up being just fine. The only hard part is when one of them is sick or just having a bad night. They tend to wake one another up in those cases and that can be frustrating. That's the only downfall though. I think it's very important that you have your own space. I love your heart though in wanting to give to your kids. Good luck with everything!

Hi T.! First of all--you're the grown-up, and you deserve your own bedroom. Seriously--you need your own room. I've just moved my 3-1/2 year old son and 12 month old daughter into the same room. The boy is in a toddler bed and the girl is in a crib--I think having the little one in a crib is very helpful, and I'd keep it that way if that's what they're used to. Our daughter had been in a pack-and-play in our room, and what worked for us what making the change on a trip--making the kids share a room while we were away from home when everything was different anyway. Then when we got back home, we just kept them in the same room. If you have any upcoming opportunity to spend the night somewhere else, you might give that a try. If not, I'd just go for it when you move--it's the same idea--everything will be different anyway, and you can just explain that this is how things will be at the new house. If your older child is excited about it, I think you'll be fine. Just make the move and see how it goes! Good luck!

I'm a single (seperated) mom too! My boys are 3 and almost 6. I think you could do bunkbeds if you can. We got ours at Walmart, so they weren't that expensive, and they've taken the wear since my youngest was not yet 2! If you are worried about him falling out of the bed, I put a body pillow next to him on the edge of the bed so he didn't fall out. I don't think its selfish that you want a room to yourself. Good luck w/your situation...I have 6 months down, 6 to go! I hate this waiting a year thing in VA, but oh well!

Hi,

My son, 6 and my daughter, 11 share a room. they love it. sure, they fight sometimes but they are very close. They have been sharing a room for 4 years now and even though they would like to have their own room at some point, they always miss each other when one or the other is gone. I absolutely feel that you should have your own room and the kids should share!! You are the adult and they are kids.

No, it's not selfish! I would keep the same bedtime routine. You don't want your daughter to start resenting your son if they have to go to bed at the same time. Plus, their sleep needs are different. Regarding the crib...would you have been ready to put him into a bed if you were staying where you are? If not, I would leave him in the crib. That might be too much change for him, especially if he isn't ready for it. My neighbor has a similar arrangement with her children, similar age. One issue that is developing now that her daughter is 7 is she wants some private space. If you can carve out a corner in the house for your daughter alone, especially as she gets a little older, she will likely appreciate it. Good luck with your move.

T.,
I would definitely put the kids in the same room so you can have your own room. As for bedtime routine, I wouldn't change your son's just yet. I would, however, alter daughter's routine slightly. Instead of one on one time in her room, have it in your room. That way you won't risk waking the baby. I don't have brothers but my niece and nephews (18, 19, & 21 yr old) all shared a room until the oldest entered middle school. They are still very close even though they attend college in different cities.

There was a time not too long ago when it was commonplace for siblings to share a room. I think it builds better relationship skills that kids need as they grow up. Good luck to you and your young family.

K.

I think your plan is fine, for now. Usually opposites shouldn't share a room past age 6. My son 8 likes to campout on the floor of his younger sister's room, but that's on special occassions.

I would try to keep the 4yr old up later. We got to the point that if the 8yr old is sleeping in the other room, that the bed time is the same.

One thing to try is to put the dressers or bookcase in between the 2 beds. That way they sort of have their own space.

M.

Yes, T.. You should absolutely have your children share a room. Kids are much more flexible than we give them credit for most times. We have three children and have always had two of them sharing. I think it strengthens the sibling bond. As for bedtimes, unless you have a need to change the 4 year old's to match the 23 month old, I wouldn't force it. You can go back in and quietly put her to bed. If you see it's a problem for your son, then you could adjust the bedtimes. I've done it both ways over the years.
Ultimately, this way your kids will be able to look back on their younger years and see that everyone had to make sacrifices, not just you. It's ok for kids to see that adults get to have certain freedoms (ie. a room of their own) that kids do not. They will know that you made plenty of other sacrifices for them.

Go ahead and let them share a room. They are little so it is perfectly fine for them to share the room together. You deserve to have a room to yourself and so does your mom. Good luck!

Keep the same routines, keep the same furniture, just have the one-on-one time with daughter outside of the bedroom, since the younger brother will be in there falling asleep.
Take the room for yourself, and have some time for yourself. It'll really help you find a way to stay focused on what is important to you and live that way. (Help separate what ideas are yours and what ideas are your mom's, or kids, or others). Good luck to you, this can't be an easy time for everyone.

I haven't done it, so I can't offer advice. But my opinion is that it's definitely your turn to have a room to yourself! Your kids are little and will learn to deal with it. I think it's fine until they're teenagers. Even then, if necessity dictates, then they have to make do.